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Revision TKR Woohoo I'm starting to feel better!

Hi @icep707

Thank you for your concern.

I had to have a revision done on my TKR. I was worse after 8 months of my TKR in January, so I was admitted on 22nd Sept. It does feel better already. In August I had to go back on antidepressants because I simply wasn't coping x x x

I was diagnosed in July with a condition called Bronchiectasis after my asthma had worsened, I had five chest infections in four months. It is treatable but not curable. Just to twist the knife further they found nodules on my lungs which they say look benign. However, I have to have annual CT scan from now on.im under the Chest Clinic for that. The consultant is a friend of my GP, so I'm being very well looked after.

My cholesterol is high so I'm on statins now and trying to be good with my food. Very difficult when you're more carnivore than herbivore lol x x x

How are you Ice?

Love Nana moon 27 xoxoxoxox
 
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Oh Lord ! I did not know you had a revision . Did they remove all the hardware from the surgery in January ?? If thats the case, than back to meds on time , all the time , elevation and excessive iceing. I will be so happy for you when you get to enjoy your knee , the way im blessed enough to enjoy mine . That will be a great day. Believe me when i say , you will enjoy your knee! As for your asthma and nodules , sounds like you are under great care and obviously all that needs to be monitored by qualified professionals. I get all my fruits and veggies through my nutri bullet. I put spinach , parsley, beets, bananas, berries , apples and chia seeds or almonds in with water and blend and drink. I also work out alot with no pain at all in the knee. I really feel great and feel much younger than 50. As for my son , he turns 22 very soon and his daughter just turned 4. As you remember he has been more than a handful and in trouble more than not. However over the last year and a half he hasnt been in jail at all. Unfortunately however with cannibis being legal, sort of in california , hes made a small fortune and managed to stay out of trouble, but im concern with his safety and stuff. So that stresses me out abit. My Girlfriend just got her dream job working for the horsing commission for the state of California. She starts in November. I guess Tuesday she goes to our state capital Sacramento for fingerprinting and final clearance. Im so happy for her. Its a dream job for her and i couldnt be happier. Whew! Thats alot of info but it whats going on, can you send some rain to California ???? Well best wishes Iceman
 
Hi @Nana moon 27, I have been trying to write a message on and off for the last 30mins and then it poof disappeared. Hope everyone is doing well. Your knee looks like it is healing. I see what you mean about the wider space but thank goodness it is healing. I can imagine it being sore and hurting as you have had a lot of manipulation with the knee. I will be exactly a year in 2 weeks for me and my knee is still sore sometimes. I cannot imagine not being able to drive all this time. I know you will be so glad to get behind the wheel when you do and drive yourself. I was so glad to get behind the wheel a few days shy of 4 weeks. I am so sorry about your job, but glad that they did give you half pay for all this time. And hopefully you will be able to go back possibly in January. It is good that you have that to look forward to and that the job is holding your spot for you. So nice the supervisor is coming to see you. Hope that visit goes well. Hope you get some good sleep :sleep:and have a good pain-free day. To you and everyone else. :loveshwr::loveshwr:
 
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@Nana moon 27
Hi Ann,
I'm sending you lots of hugs! :console2::friends::friends::console2:

I'm so sorry your husband acted as he did. It must have been awful for you. I can understand a bit why he did it, though. My husband is being quite good, but I know that he is counting the days until he can be the passenger in running the house again. He keeps on telling me how tired he is, just from doing the cooking and dishes, when I usually do them all the time. I'm afraid I usually come up with a smart answer, such as "Yes, A housewife's work is never done!"

I'm feeling your frustration, too. Around 3 to 4 weeks after surgery is when the black time usually hits - when you feel as though you should be all better, but you are not. You're better enough to notice what is going on, but not better enough to do all the things you want to do. And just so darn fed up with the healing taking so long!
It will pass, but I am right there, feeling it with you!
 
Hi @Celle,

Caryl, You are so right. I think he needs the load lightening a bit. I've had a few words with my daughter tonight, not exactly bad but stood my ground.

There is no doubt after 9 months me and my husband need a break. He wants to catch the tail end (excuse the pun) of the fishing season here before it finishes on the 17th. He and I agree that I should be ok to manage alone after my OS appointment on Tuesday. I can't do heavy housework but I can do a sandwich, microwave a jacket potato or a ready meal. Other people who live alone have to cope. My daughter disagrees completely saying that he should be here full stop. Supposing I fall in the shower or downstairs etc etc etc. Very difficult. I can see both sides. She is saying he's got into my head again and getting his own way above my own needs. She said three weeks post op is too soon to be left alone.

Rock and a hard place here at the moment. Don't know what to do for the better xxxx

Live Ann xxx
 
Read josephine story of going it alone after TKR. It is in the library.


Sent from my iPod touch using BoneSmart®
LTKR Sept 13 2011
Revision April 15 2014
 
Oh @Pumpkln it is fantastic. I read it before. It's so beautifully written and she managed ever so well, even feeding the cats. So there's no reason why I can't be left alone as long as I'm careful with the stairs xxxx

Only fish to feed in the tank and the pond xxx

Love Ann xxx
 
Ann @Nana moon 27

Sometimes those with the biggest heart feel the most pain.

Knowing you are a very caring person through your posts and witnessing your kind and warm heart in what you write, it can be 'heart breaking' when those who should be closest to you seem to have a coldness in their heart.

When our role in a relationship changes due to health, financial, empty nests, new interests, etc. and the familiar has changed, anger can sometimes fill in the gaps.

It is fear of the unknown, that as the ground is shifting from what once was to the new way of living and having new roles that can be frightening.

Fear can manifest as anger and anger then can be destructive to a relationship.

When you're down and weary, you just want comfort,peace and understanding.

You were very honest in your post and sharing that experience with others hopefully took some of the pain from your heart.

Hoping for better days ahead,
Cathie
 
God bless you Cathie @marmora. Your words are so kind. It took me a lot of courage to post that tonight. I needed to do it. Yes, you're right I do feel better.

I really do think that it's the situation we are both finding ourselves in xxx the shock to us both. Before my knee went completely last August, we used to walk miles. Ok I'd be in agony after and need pain killers but I still did it until the bone on bone episode. That when the world changed for us.

Thank you for your support xxx

Love Ann xxx
 
Oh dear, husbands I've got one of those I don't think they realise what there like sometimes,I know mine gets very angry and cross sometimes and when I tell him he's always sorry, not that it helps at the time, but after 43years I guess I can cope.
Anne your bound to feel low after two major operations in less than a year,let him look after you,I bet he feels really bad,it will get better your doing so well.Take care love Terri
 
Oh Ann my heart goes out to you, when I read your post of your call from hospital I felt so bad for you, but I'm sure your husband feels a hundred times worse than me. Thirty seven years of marriage is something special, you both have foundations going back a long way, yes there might be a major earthquake going on at the moment, but you will both survive that. It might be a bit strange and uncomfortable now, but nowhere near as strange and uncomfortable if he wasn't there at all, I'm sure he feels that deep down he needs to support you.
I thought @marmora's post was beautiful, I just can't put it as well as she did.
Lots of love you you xxx
 
@Nana moon 27, I have come to this a little late. I know just how you feel reading last night's post. We have been married 39 years but my illnesses over the last ten years have taken its toll on our relationship. Just as we are getting over one hiccup another one comes. We have discussed spliting a couple of times but have ridden the storm. I think it is hard on the partners. The patient is cared for in hospital but their partner is often at home alone worrying. I have had twelve ops in the last ten years and other stays in hospital.They don't know how to make things better. My hubby is worse, the more pain I am in. Sometimes I hide it from him. It isn't that he doesn't care but he doesn't know how to make things better. He hasn't got a magic wand. He is frustrated by it all and his way of coping is to shy away. It is not just the hospital stays but the endless rounds of appointments and treatments and the care that is needed. Fitting in of holidays and not being able to plan ahead in case you are not well. We have come to the stage of life when we should be out enjoying life without the strings that were attached in our younger years. We should be free and easy not constrained by the effects of this surgery. I think it makes us all weary, carers included. We are not our normal selves.

I was medically retired a few years ago and hubby decided to retire early as the pressure of work and looking after me was too great.
 
@Nana moon 27 Sounds like the fishing trip is just what you both need. Just carry your mobile all the time to reassure everyone. I felt much better emotionally after any of my surgeries when I could be left alone. Perhaps your daughters could make some dinners that you could heat in the microwave.
I have been very fortunate and also have a "star" of a husband through all of this. I have also been fortunate in how I have recovered. Part of recovery is dealing with the mental side of things. I imagine anyone who has a difficult recovery is angry and frustrated and questions what the "new normal" will be. Add in pain meds, and pain, to the mix then emotions get high.
It may help to set some recovery goals -- small ones at first -- and keep a record of what you have accomplished. My big goal after any surgery was always to get onto Tylenol alone as soon as possible --sometimes it took quite a time but I knew when I did that I was able to be more myself as I could sleep well. I wonder if next time you see the OS you can talk about creating a long-term plan to wean off the morphine.
Hang in there Ann! :friends:
 
You have hit the nail right on the head! Funnily he keeps saying now much he wishes I could get back to normal. (Since we had the big row he has opened up, which for him is unusual). You're right about the endless rounds of appointments. It's constant knee, chest and GP appointments. He has said too that he feels like he's lived in hospitals/doctors, this last 9 months. Add into the equation a revision that we didn't expect and he's thrown back to square one again. Into a role he finds very hard. Apparently he can't stand being helpless and watching me suffer. His answer to this was to put up a shield and withdraw away behind it. Again add in my total insomnia and 22 tablets a day, my chest constantly feeling rubbish and taking three inhalers, wow, chaos.

Again, you are right about the fitting in of holidays, is nigh on impossible, when you have endless rounds of appointments.

I do understand all of this. I said before that not all men are born nurses/carers. I totally understand too why he feels the need for a break. He does need it. The girls don't understand this. This morning he went out. I took my mobile into the bathroom. Had a shower got washed, dried. dressed, brushed my teeth and hair. I went downstairs put a little light rubbish into the bin. I miraculously ignored the washing up because the amount down there I'd have been standing still for too long. I put some underwear/nightwear into the machine.

I came back up, went into the other bedroom and got my magnifying mirror our. I plucked and tidied my eyebrows, tied my hair up in a high ponytail, secured it with a bobble and twisted it into a high bun. I cleansed my skin, serum and moisturised. I got some gentle skin moisturiser and gently massaged the edges of my scar and rubbed the rest in. I felt half human again. It got on my nerves doing the plucking but my face looks much better for it xxx I think it's probably too, a few years off (not many). I cannot do that Cara Delevigne look with the thick bushy eyebrows. Eek x

Thank you all for your support, I really thank you. I needed it. I wasn't coping at all. I was just festering over it and the self destruct button that is my depression was starting to have a real hold and negative effect..
 
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Nana moon 27 said:
Apparently he can't stand being helpless and watching me suffer. His answer to this was to put up a shield and withdraw away behind it.
Click to expand...

Hi Ann, @Nana moon 27

Wow! You really hit the nail on the head there! I think that is what bothers a lot of men who are used to having capable wives.

I know that it bothers John, and that he reacts in exactly the same way as your husband - he withdraws and does nothing. I have found that the best way to deal with it is to be direct and specific - "I need you to do this for me, right now, because I am sore." He never "gets" hints or messages that a woman would understand.

When I had my partial knee replacement, John had to go away on business 2 weeks later. I managed just fine and I think you probably could, too. It does take a bit of forward planning for things such as groceries and TV dinners. Make sure that you have a phone beside you all the time, so that you can call for help, if necessary. Ask your daughters to each check in with you daily.

It's just the stairs that worry me a little. Do you have a downstairs loo? If so, could you move downstairs for the time that your hubby is away fishing? Because I think that he deserves a break, too.
 
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Oh @Celle a few years ago I was given a lovely gas range cooker with twin ovens, a griddle, five burners the lot. If I want a downstairs loo, it has to go and be replaced with a gas hob and inbuilt oven, to which I've now said ok. Problem is with me on half pay there's no spare money. So we have to try and save for it xxx

The stairs are quite narrow. Once I'm facing straight there's just enough room for me and two sticks,I be either side. The space is ultra tight!!

Like you I have to be direct which I hate because it can found bossy even with the prefix saying "can you do me a favour please? ".

Night @robynhood I did manage a two hour nap this afternoon xxx

Love Nana moon 27 xxx
 
Wow @Nana moon 27, Ann, I am glad you got that off your chest and you can see you are not at all alone. I think hubby should have some time away. I don't know if you said how long he would be gone??.. Ann, you are a strong woman and in spite of the perils you have been through this is another hurdle that you can and will get over. I think in order for your husband to continue to be supportive and there for you, letting him have a little space would be great. You already know you must be careful on the stairs. @marmora and @Celle summed things up nicely. You will be okay. Cell phone on or near you at all times excellent suggestion. Keep us posted on the board here. I know you will. Wishing you a good night's sleep and a great day tomorrow. Take good care of yourself. :loveshwr::loveshwr:
 
Woohoo!!! I just had almost three hours sleep. I must share this. Very early on in my previous recovery in January, I was recommended by a @kar1963 (Bless her!) on the forum, to try a sleep app. It worked back then but I was a bit wary of it as I was having probs with the morphine. Every time I closed my eyes I kept seeing things. Anyway I thought last night in desperation I'd try it. Thank goodness I did. It is called "sleep hypnosis" by Erick Brown.
Sleep Deep Hypnosis Subliminal by Erick Brown on the App Store ...
broken link removed: https://itunes.apple.com/gb/app/
I've had also most three hours xxx well worth a shot xxx

Love Nana moon 27 xxxx
 
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