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Revision TKR Still having difficulty .... from Amberpep

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I think DC is the worst city we ever drove in. We were so lost trying to get to Arlington and kept driving in circles. NYC is a dream next to DC!
 
Abby,

You have to ask your children to help you! They are waiting to hear from a strong independent woman who wants to do everything for herself!

They know that if they offered you would say "I don't want to impose!"

Please :beg: Call your children! They need you just as much as you need them.

Spoken by a daughter who has a mom like you!:whistle::wave:
 
Jozilla ..... I totally agree with you. I may have said this before to you all, but driving in D.C. is like driving in the dark with a road full of monkeys. OI VEY! :yikes:
Abby
 
Rest Assured .... I know you're right. I am very hesitant to do that. Both my girls live 4 hours away and my son lives in Alexandria and works right in D.C. If I should need any type of surgery I will ask him, but with all the appts. before and after surgery, if I'd ask him, he'd probably, "sigh....and say he had a lot of work to do." When I had the original TKR he took me and was going to wait til I was in recovery. Well, it took a bit longer than expected so apparently he told the lady at the desk that he had to go back to work, to call him when I was done. Now, suppose something would have happened and I needed for a decision to be made? He's my trustee and my DPoA ....... nice.
abby
 
I am a born and bred DC driver, even 38 years after moving away!!

Park in Rosslyn and take the subway where you need to go. That's what I do.
 
maryo52 - OMG .... you must be talking a foreign language! I have no idea where Rosslyn is, though I've heard of it, and the metro? YEOWEE I've only been on it 2x in my 40 years in MD, so you can just imagine how twisted up I'd get. Living in Frederick, most of us avoid going down county unless we work there. It's like it's another land.
I think I'm totally directionally impaired!
Abby
 
I wish my knee was well enough to ride a subway, we do not have them were I live so I consider a subway ride a treat.
 
Abby, you know....the reason you get that response from your son is probably a factor of the way you talk to him about helping you. Do you ask in a way that allows him to waffle? He should be helping you. Period. Be sure you leave no room for less with a comment like......

"I need you to help me get to my surgeon's appointments and to and from the hospital for surgery. Here are the dates and times for the appointments. If there is a particular day that is a problem for you, please let me know now so I can make adjustments." Then you can gush a bit about how much you appreciate his help.

Just be sure you're not starting sentences with "Would you....." or "Could you....".

And how about getting your daughters to put a little pressure on him. I agree with RestAssured that this is payback time for all those things you've done for them.
 
If your son is too busy, give him a choice - take me, or pay for a taxi. Think how much good you will be doing his character by making him care for his mother! :heehee:

OK. I'll get off your case now - sorry to nag you. :friends:
 
I am sorry that you are having so many problems with your recovery. I am also having a very slow recovery and it gets so frustrating.

I agree with the others - you need to to ask your son directly for help (either direct or financial to take a taxi/get assistance from Visiting Angels). Like most younger people I am sure that he has no idea how bad this surgery is and how much help you might need. he probably thinks you are coping well - most people have absolutely no idea - I know I didn't.

I would not read anything at all into the fact that he didn't wait during your surgery (I was gone from the ward for almost 8 hours). The hospital I had my TKR at didn't even allow relatives to stay around the ward - they were sent home and in normal cases had to wait for the patient to call.
 
Wow .... you all are so right on. Are you sure you're not listening to my phone calls??? I do tend to "back in" a request, instead of asking for help outright. And, since I've always been healthy and active, I don't think any of my kids realize how extensive this surgery is. I never wanted to be a whiner and I'm afraid I don't know where the line is between whining and demanding and just asking for what I legitimately need.
Pumpkin .... that's funny. For me, the D.C. metro system couldn't be more confusing. It's a big one with arms going all over the place. With my knowledge of D.C. (very little) and poor sense of direction, well, I'd probably be one of those "adult amber alerts." :hairpulling:
You are all so very right .... so why do I have such trouble doing it? That's the backstory. Can we say "wus?"
abby :giggle:
 
My dear, I agree with @RestAssured about accepting help.

Our TKR knee should be loved and cared for as if it was our child. Accepting help is part of offering our knee the very best.
 
@amberpep,

This is your time. You raised three healthy children who are now capable of returning some of the many things you sacrificed in order for them to have the life they wanted to live. Whether it was sports, paying for different activities, fund raisers, or just being there as a Mom to listen, you sacrificed over 18+ years of your life. It wasn't a punishment, it was the pride of being a mother.

Now, the tables are turned. Why do you think you should deserve any less respect?
 
Recently I had tell one of my brothers to go see Mom, I told him he had to go, he is retired and has the time. He went for two days, took a load off my other brother who was getting 2 to 3 calls a day.
Had I asked he would have too busy.
Tough to be the one asking, have them help you, better now, than them feeling guilty after you turn you toes up and they are saying I wish we had helped Mom more.


Sent from my iPod touch using BoneSmart®
 
True @Pumpkln! I lost my Dad to cancer when he was 52 and I was 26!:cry:

I still miss him everyday:sad:, though the people who knew him say I have his personality, laugh, and sense of humor! Oh and his sense of Shyness too!:wink::)

My Mom is the only one I have left and I try to see her as much as possible! I would do anything for her! She has done so much for me that I can never repay; this is my chance to make her happy as long as possible!:happydance::yes!:

By the way, Mom says that my Sister takes after her, quiet shy and introverted!:wink: Hmmmm... maybe Mom should look up shy in "my" dictionary!:wink: :rotfl:
 
Hi all ..... sorry I have not written for a few days ..... my computer "went on vacation" I guess, and I had to call the computer guy I use. He finally came this afternoon so I'm back in working order again. Phew ...... didn't realize how addicted I was to it.
Well, I talked to my OS Tues. and he gave me the name of another doctor who is more reasonably located for me. He said he's excellent with knees and he's a good one for another opinion. He wrote a 4-page letter and e-mailed it to me to print out and give to the new doc. and it explains everything that's happened the passed 3 years. It was quite detailed. And ... at the end he said that he felt I might be a good candidate for a revision.
It appears there are a lot of lawsuits against DePuy for just this very thing. My question is, if DePuy knows there's a problem with them, why don't they work on changing the defect? My guess is that when they work, they work well, but sometimes there's a glitch in them. I don't know .... just a thought.
Good to be back here with all of you.
abby :yes:
 
Abby,
Glad to see you are back online!
Great your OS is being so supportive of you finding a second opinion, hope you can get in for your second opinion soon!
I have no idea why the companies do what they do, look at GM with the faulty ignition switch.
 
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