TKR Speedy2 Knee's First Birthday!
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Rlucillem
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Hey I know EXACTLY what you are going through. I am also 46 and had partial knee replacements July 15. My cousin had totals on April 1 and he went thru it with flying colors...no pain..
I am so discouraged I had REAL pain and can't work like I want to and the left knee is still stiff and tight. I have wished a million times that I had NOT had it done. I lost my mom in March and that with the surgery, I have had some real dark days. Hope this finds you feeling better. I live in a constant fear of needing another replacement since I am so young. I am really tired of hearing the "no pain" stories. rlucillem
Hi Rlucillem, so sorry to hear that you are having a rough ride but if it makes you feel any better I think you'll find most people on this forum have had problems one way or another. I know when I first found Bonesmart it was such a relief to find others that were on, or had been on, the same journey. I can well understand your feelings of 'what have I done' as I had them myself on quite a few occasions. I also have had dark days which again is part of the course but I hadn't realized it. However, you have had the added trauma of losing your Mum which must be devastating for you.
Perhaps you were like me and had unrealistic expectations about how the operation would effect you? I really didn't know what to expect except after being in pain for years I foolishly thought it couldn't be any worse - i've also realized that i'm not a very patient person towards myself! The one important message that everyone quotes is don't compare yourself with anybody else as we all heal and recuperate at different rates - which is so true but also difficult to do at times.
I'm sure that you will find that some days you will find that you are not in so much pain as others. I have had excellent advice about elevating and icing my knee on a very regular basis which has definitely helped with the pain and swelling. I also realized that I hadn't been elevating it correctly! And if you have looked at other threads i'm sure that you will know that the Bonesmart mantra is rest,medicate, elevate and ice.
Keep your chin up, we are all here to support each other. I hope knowing there are others that care will in turn make you feel better. I'm sure others, far more experienced than me, will be able to offer you specific help and advice if you need it.
Take care.
Perhaps you were like me and had unrealistic expectations about how the operation would effect you? I really didn't know what to expect except after being in pain for years I foolishly thought it couldn't be any worse - i've also realized that i'm not a very patient person towards myself! The one important message that everyone quotes is don't compare yourself with anybody else as we all heal and recuperate at different rates - which is so true but also difficult to do at times.
I'm sure that you will find that some days you will find that you are not in so much pain as others. I have had excellent advice about elevating and icing my knee on a very regular basis which has definitely helped with the pain and swelling. I also realized that I hadn't been elevating it correctly! And if you have looked at other threads i'm sure that you will know that the Bonesmart mantra is rest,medicate, elevate and ice.
Keep your chin up, we are all here to support each other. I hope knowing there are others that care will in turn make you feel better. I'm sure others, far more experienced than me, will be able to offer you specific help and advice if you need it.
Take care.
patient 99
post-grad
Rlucillem, Oh such a sad post. But honestly what speedy2 says is so right. Two things stand out. One, you say` you wished you hadn't had it done'. My recovery is slow and it gets me down too, but the one thing that keeps me fighting back is that I know if I hadn't gone ahead my knee would FOR CERTAIN have just got worse and worse. At least this way I have hope that it will get better and better still. This is true for you too.
The second is that you live in fear of needing to go through it again if it wears out. You can't deal with the What Ifs. You have enough on your plate with what you have to deal with today. The What Ifs are the unknown and 100 and 1 things could change them.
But you know I have a strong feeling that you already know all of this. If you are down and grieving (which is how it sounds) you need comfort and support. We can't bring your Mum back. We can't wave a wound and make your knee better. But Bonesmarties are ace at listening and giving comfort and support, not to mention loads of practical help. Keep messaging. Carol
Bionic woman2
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I think a big part of the problem is we've been "Hoodwinked" into thinking it's a quick recovery and it's not. 
Telling someone they'll be back to normal in 6-12 weeks after KRS is the equivalent of telling a woman she's only going to carry her baby for 9 weeks! lol Whether or not the woman has a C-section or natural birth, she's still gotta do close to 9 months to have that baby. As far as TKR vs PKR goes it doesn't matter; a slit open, sawed on body is gonna take around the same amount of time to heal, then the joint mechanism in place will make the difference.. but first you gotta heal. I too have the 6+ inch scar and two holes top and bottom on each of my legs. Those to use to hold the surgical robot in place. Thanks for holding THAT tidbit of information back before surgery doc! 
I get depressed too. I was was really down for a while, having to recover without a mate and just my boys as my helpers.
THAT'S a whole nother story. 
One of the main things that helped me cope was BONESMART. Reading other member's struggles, making cyber friends and LAUGHING OUT LOUD! I almost got addicted to the site, it's like Crack
, not that I would now anything about that! 
Seriously, I say it's like Online Dating without the heartache and disappointment. When you're feeling down, you can always find someone doing worse off than you, someone who's overcome what you're presently going through and someone who is exactly right where you are and there's tons of laughter along the way.
So step away from the razor and get down off the ledge (yep, some people consider doing a double.... What's that movie with Sandra Bullock, Sylvester Stallon and Wesley Snipes? There was a line in it that went, "Murder, death, kill." lol I'm laughing wit'cha.
Come'on, open up and SHARE your struggle so we can help you. You may be doing something that we've already done and KNOW it doesn't work and may be hurting your progress.
There's a movie called "Laugh At My Pain" by a stand-up comedian Kevin Hart. I always thought he was too foolish for me. Well about 2 weeks out of my first knee surgery, I watched it on netflix and LOL the whole time. If I could have
I would have. When I was done it was like the heavy spirit was lifted off of me. A few days later I found bonesmart where I now perform my "Cyber Sit-Down Comedy" on a regular basis. I AM going to go through this pain, and it's gonna take as long as it takes... I can do it isolated and depressed, or I can do it with other people who are going through the same thing and sometimes get depressed. Bottom-line you can't un-do your PKR, so come hang out with a fellow PKRer who has/had the same doubts/questions/pain/depression and aggravation.
I am so sorry to hear about your mom. I know that's still fresh. Both my parents are deceased and I still miss them. I think about asking my mom stuff and I can't. That hurts.
I joke that "I'm grown" because there's no one who can correct me when I make a mistake, but the flip-side is they're not here to help me my when life seems to be falling apart. I miss that. Not trying to make you cry, just know I can relate. 
Hope to see you on my page.
Telling someone they'll be back to normal in 6-12 weeks after KRS is the equivalent of telling a woman she's only going to carry her baby for 9 weeks! lol Whether or not the woman has a C-section or natural birth, she's still gotta do close to 9 months to have that baby. As far as TKR vs PKR goes it doesn't matter; a slit open, sawed on body is gonna take around the same amount of time to heal, then the joint mechanism in place will make the difference.. but first you gotta heal. I too have the 6+ inch scar and two holes top and bottom on each of my legs. Those to use to hold the surgical robot in place. Thanks for holding THAT tidbit of information back before surgery doc! I get depressed too. I was was really down for a while, having to recover without a mate and just my boys as my helpers.
THAT'S a whole nother story. One of the main things that helped me cope was BONESMART. Reading other member's struggles, making cyber friends and LAUGHING OUT LOUD! I almost got addicted to the site, it's like Crack , not that I would now anything about that! Seriously, I say it's like Online Dating without the heartache and disappointment. When you're feeling down, you can always find someone doing worse off than you, someone who's overcome what you're presently going through and someone who is exactly right where you are and there's tons of laughter along the way.So step away from the razor and get down off the ledge (yep, some people consider doing a double.... What's that movie with Sandra Bullock, Sylvester Stallon and Wesley Snipes? There was a line in it that went, "Murder, death, kill." lol I'm laughing wit'cha.
Come'on, open up and SHARE your struggle so we can help you. You may be doing something that we've already done and KNOW it doesn't work and may be hurting your progress.There's a movie called "Laugh At My Pain" by a stand-up comedian Kevin Hart. I always thought he was too foolish for me. Well about 2 weeks out of my first knee surgery, I watched it on netflix and LOL the whole time. If I could have
I would have. When I was done it was like the heavy spirit was lifted off of me. A few days later I found bonesmart where I now perform my "Cyber Sit-Down Comedy" on a regular basis. I AM going to go through this pain, and it's gonna take as long as it takes... I can do it isolated and depressed, or I can do it with other people who are going through the same thing and sometimes get depressed. Bottom-line you can't un-do your PKR, so come hang out with a fellow PKRer who has/had the same doubts/questions/pain/depression and aggravation.I am so sorry to hear about your mom. I know that's still fresh. Both my parents are deceased and I still miss them. I think about asking my mom stuff and I can't. That hurts.
I joke that "I'm grown" because there's no one who can correct me when I make a mistake, but the flip-side is they're not here to help me my when life seems to be falling apart. I miss that. Not trying to make you cry, just know I can relate. Hope to see you on my page.
Rlucillem
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Rlucillem
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Carol, Thanks so much for your support. My mom was the closest person I had in my life. I still have to cry when I think about her. With the recent surgery my emotions have really been upset. One thing makes it worse is hearing the story of my cousin who had a full double knee replacement in April and had no pain. WHY?? because he is a man?
Oh well life is hard and I had even more issues to deal with that would fill the page. Thanks again, rlucillem
Oh well life is hard and I had even more issues to deal with that would fill the page. Thanks again, rlucillem
BigGene
graduate
Speedy, you are right. This surgery will change your life. Just not in two months.
I could not go up or down a step. Now, two years later I can do anything I want. I ski, hike, ride my bike long distances but it didn't happen overnight.
It's hard to be patient. You will get both support and good advice here. Follow it and next year you will hardly remember the challenges of recovery.
Hang in there it is worth it!
I could not go up or down a step. Now, two years later I can do anything I want. I ski, hike, ride my bike long distances but it didn't happen overnight.
It's hard to be patient. You will get both support and good advice here. Follow it and next year you will hardly remember the challenges of recovery.
Hang in there it is worth it!
BigGene - Now that's the sort of encouragement that we all want to here - thank you.
Rlucillem are you absolutely sure that your cousin had a double knee replacement? I have had so much advice from people like this and then when you get down to the nitty gritty they've had an arthroscopy - no comparison!
Even if he has he may well have complications later. Some people are just lucky, however these seem to be few and far between.
bionicwoman you are right, 'recovery' is definitely helped by having the wonderful support and advice from this sight. Whatever you feel, someone has felt the same which is so reassuring. At the end of the day we just want to know that everything is as 'normal' as it can be at the various stages of our recuperation.
Rlucillem are you absolutely sure that your cousin had a double knee replacement? I have had so much advice from people like this and then when you get down to the nitty gritty they've had an arthroscopy - no comparison!
Even if he has he may well have complications later. Some people are just lucky, however these seem to be few and far between.
bionicwoman you are right, 'recovery' is definitely helped by having the wonderful support and advice from this sight. Whatever you feel, someone has felt the same which is so reassuring. At the end of the day we just want to know that everything is as 'normal' as it can be at the various stages of our recuperation.
Bionic woman2
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Did you hear this from HIS mouth, did you see him go through his recovery? Sometimes things get lost in the translation. Also some men do not admit they're in pain and sometimes they're BIG BABIES! lol So your cousin is a macho man, that's not all bad.
Believe me if he had 2 TKRs He had SOME kind of pain right BigGene. Perhaps, we can hear from a male's perspective why there aren't a lot of men on this site. Maybe you guys recover differently. We definitely have different frames. I think the percentage of replacements is something like 60/40, male/female. 
Yet, I don't see near as many men on her to match that ratio.Bottom line is I can't look at other people who are doing better than I am in this recovery and get upset. Shoot, if I took that attitude in life I'd be mega depressed because "Life for me ain't been no crystal stair." Langston Hughes must have wrote that poem for me! lol
I've just learned to make the best of my lot. If I can change something, cool. If I can't it's serenity prayer time. I laugh, I cry, I laugh some more. That's Life! 
Hey, I've got all kinds of quote and songs going on this morning.... What else is new. 
Hi speedy2
, I think I kinda got confused as to who's thread I was on in my earlier post, I was speaking to Rlucillem but I imagine it was for the good of the group. In any event I apologize, not trying to high-jack your thread or anything. My knees aren't yet up to running from the authorities. I hope you're having a great day. My knees are my knees. lol it's 3 weeks out from my surgery on my LPKR today and I still do the Thriller walk WITH the walker to bathroom in the morning. lol This too shall pass.Have a Kneeeasy day everybody
kar1963
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I am loving this thread as most of you are around my surgery date of Aug20 i agree on the jeans issue I put min on and could not stand it. I got some nice cotton pants in case I need to look less gym or pt , we have a wedding to go to this month so now I am looking for something to.wear to that and I hate shopping but am grateful or online shopping. I did some.shopping with my husband but only lasted about 15min then I had to go to the car , that made me sad but I know this to shall pass. Take care everyone
Bionic woman2
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It will pass and one day you'll be able to Shop Til you Drop
, not Plop!
Just had my other knee done, so no Black Friday for me. I can barely imagine getting through preparing Thanksgiving dinner, much less going out shopping the next day. Good thing, since I'm broke as all get out. It's gonna be a Tiny Tim Christmas FOR REAL this year. lol
, not Plop! Just had my other knee done, so no Black Friday for me. I can barely imagine getting through preparing Thanksgiving dinner, much less going out shopping the next day. Good thing, since I'm broke as all get out. It's gonna be a Tiny Tim Christmas FOR REAL this year. lolI've also got a wedding to go to and can't imagine what I will wear at this moment in time - unless it's my 'so stylish navy joggers'. I can just manage supermarket shopping if my husband parks close but i've had it after that and can't wait to get home to my bag of peas!!! What an exciting life. I must say I think I need to smarten myself up as even my husband is trying to encourage me to go to the hairdressers. And just think kar1963 how much money your saving by not shopping - save it and then you can really go mad!
And Bionic woman2 I think you're amazing to be thinking of preparing Thanksgiving dinner as your knee is so new-you have the perfect excuse not to. Don't you think Christmas has got so out of hand anyway and lost its true meaning? I will never listen to Micheal Jackson 'Thriller' without imagining you and your walk!
By the way, I can see that you are an expert at these little icons but I still haven't mastered it yet -any tips?
And Bionic woman2 I think you're amazing to be thinking of preparing Thanksgiving dinner as your knee is so new-you have the perfect excuse not to. Don't you think Christmas has got so out of hand anyway and lost its true meaning? I will never listen to Micheal Jackson 'Thriller' without imagining you and your walk!
By the way, I can see that you are an expert at these little icons but I still haven't mastered it yet -any tips?
Bionic woman2
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Hi Speedy. I just saw a commercial that used the Thriller song in the background and I laughed out loud for real. I should send them a video of "Walker lady" and see if I can get in on the next commercial. Yes Walker Lady is one of my personas. She's new, came with the 2nd knee surgery. 
Okay, the smileys. See that smiley face up top, and a little off / center to the right? The slash I typed should lead you to it. Just click on it and select till your hearts content. You can insert them wherever you want, just stop typing and "click it... click it good." That's my new version of "Whip It." Something else to reprogram your brain... You're welcome.
Yes Walker Lady is one of my personas. She's new, came with the 2nd knee surgery. Okay, the smileys. See that smiley face up top, and a little off / center to the right? The slash I typed should lead you to it. Just click on it and select till your hearts content. You can insert them wherever you want, just stop typing and "click it... click it good." That's my new version of "Whip It." Something else to reprogram your brain... You're welcome.
cycling67
junior member
Hi Everyone! Finally able to catch up on posts.
BigGene
Rlucillem: I am so sorry to hear of the difficult times you have had. I completely understand all you are going through and understand those dark days and how horrible they are. My Dad passed away this past May 17th after a long 9 week Hospice care scenario where myself and 3 siblings took care of him 24x7 in shifts. That was truly the hardest thing I have ever done and losing my Dad and last parent alive is certainly lonely. It is strange because this recovery from the RTKR at age 45 is also the 'hardest thing I have ever done' but in a different way. I have often felt that I have started to feel more grief at the loss of Dad and Mom (from 15 years ago) during this recovery. Likely because I am about as raw as possible. Please try and find the happiness of each day and count your blessings. I do this each and every hour. I still have plenty of dark times when I just don't want to do anything but we have to keep moving. Patience is my challenge. I also often think that my Mom and Dad can maybe better take care of me from heaven and are always watching over me.
All: This is such a wonderful forum with amazing people and amazing support. Today has been one of those 'dark days' but I am working through it and it helps to simply talk. Thank you all for listening. Once again, all my best to everyone and best wishes for your recovery!
BigGene
Excellent words BigGene and thank you SO MUCH! I am one of the impatient people and am working each day to try and learn. I am 9 weeks out tomorrow. With lots of effort and after warming up I can get to 108 so there is progress just super slow. I will keep on keeping on doing what is necessary for as long as necessary.
Rlucillem: I am so sorry to hear of the difficult times you have had. I completely understand all you are going through and understand those dark days and how horrible they are. My Dad passed away this past May 17th after a long 9 week Hospice care scenario where myself and 3 siblings took care of him 24x7 in shifts. That was truly the hardest thing I have ever done and losing my Dad and last parent alive is certainly lonely. It is strange because this recovery from the RTKR at age 45 is also the 'hardest thing I have ever done' but in a different way. I have often felt that I have started to feel more grief at the loss of Dad and Mom (from 15 years ago) during this recovery. Likely because I am about as raw as possible. Please try and find the happiness of each day and count your blessings. I do this each and every hour. I still have plenty of dark times when I just don't want to do anything but we have to keep moving. Patience is my challenge. I also often think that my Mom and Dad can maybe better take care of me from heaven and are always watching over me.
All: This is such a wonderful forum with amazing people and amazing support. Today has been one of those 'dark days' but I am working through it and it helps to simply talk. Thank you all for listening. Once again, all my best to everyone and best wishes for your recovery!
Well Bionic woman2, it's official the TKR has left me with no brain!! You would not belief how long i've been looking for smiley faces to click on - i've been up and down the page. Is mine different from everyone else or am I just very thick??????? I can not see a smiley face at the top of the page only my profile 'thingy' and nothing on that that resembles a smiley. I now just have to do it - I need a smiley character!!!!!!! I have even clicked on everybody elses smiley face but nothing happens. What a twit I must be...
You are doing so well cycling67 108% is fantastic - you must be so pleased. I'm nearly 10wks now and last week managed 95% with physio's help. I have been using my exercise bike more this week as now the saddle has been highered, I can manage to rotate backwards 'slowly'. At first it is quite painful to push over the top but it gets easier and loser the more I do. When I say 'more' that is a bit of an exaggeration, perhaps 6 - 10 rotations depending on how it feels. Don't think i'll burn too many calories or win too many races but hay ho from small beginnings...
Wasn't it encouraging to hear BigGene's success - that's a real motivator. Do you find the days all roll into one. How can they fly by so quickly when nothing much happens in them??? Some strange things have happened to my head since i've had this TKR!
Wasn't it encouraging to hear BigGene's success - that's a real motivator. Do you find the days all roll into one. How can they fly by so quickly when nothing much happens in them??? Some strange things have happened to my head since i've had this TKR!
kar1963
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I agree thinking of thanksgiving dinner preparation scares me , I am glad a d this year my sister said she would do it and all I have to bring is bread easy peasy.. I have been great at not spending money whirlwind.on leave but tomorrow I am splurging me. After pt I am going to get my do did, the whole.enchilada cut color to include dark purple highlights that I love and a brow and moustache wax . I am hoping the little extra work I did.today gets the bends bending better I am worried that I am only at 85 ,my therapist has not put me on a bike yet I wonder if I should ask her why.. well off.to bed for me night all
cycling67
junior member
Thanks Speedy2, i am happy about the 108. I am sure with time it will be easier to get there without warming up so much and stretching. 95 is great too, that is about where i am after a little warm up. We are doing this!!! SO glad you are able to ride the bike now even if only a bit. The recumbant bike and my upright stationary bike at home are my 'go to' PT equipment, so grateful for them. I had to raise the bike seat as well but each week i try and lower 1 notch.
Yes BigGene is a great motivator, yay!!! I find the days long actually, things take me do much longer. Mornings and night are the hardest for me, which is probably typical as my knee is the most stiff then. I remember earlier in my recovery where i felt pain or discomfort 24x7. I now have times when i feel not too bad, maybe not normal but not bad.
95 is great too, that is about where i am after a little warm up. We are doing this!!! SO glad you are able to ride the bike now even if only a bit. The recumbant bike and my upright stationary bike at home are my 'go to' PT equipment, so grateful for them. I had to raise the bike seat as well but each week i try and lower 1 notch.Yes BigGene is a great motivator, yay!!! I find the days long actually, things take me do much longer. Mornings and night are the hardest for me, which is probably typical as my knee is the most stiff then. I remember earlier in my recovery where i felt pain or discomfort 24x7. I now have times when i feel not too bad, maybe not normal but not bad.
icecoldtony
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Speedy I'm glad to see you are doing much better. I forgot to mention that one thing that seemed to make a big difference for me was an ice machine. Specifically the Donjoy iceman. For the first 8 weeks or so after my surgery I was using homemade ice bags to ice my knee. I used a combination of water and alcohol. Once the ice melted I would have to wait until they refroze. Plus it was inconvenient to put the melted ones back and get some fresh ones. So I only iced 2 or 3 times a day. A friend I met by chance had both knees replaced a couple of years ago and offered me the use of his Donjoy. The beauty of this machine is you set it up and the machine will keep your knee cold for hours. Using this machine I was able to keep my knee iced for 5 to 6 hours a day. Sometimes more. I was fortunate to have good ROM early in my recovery but the machine speeded up the reduction in my swelling and made the rest of my ROM improvements come much more quickly than they had been. These machines aren't cheap. If you can afford one or are able to get one some other way I think you would find it extremely helpful. Google it and see. There are other machines out there but I have no experience with them. Using just the bags would have worked the same. It would have just been a slower and longer process. Good luck!
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