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I am so sore but grateful I had the surgery

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Do you know what i used to live by....be gentle with yourself Rich and be true to yourself Rich-

Those two expressions i swore by, they were like the sun rising in the east, like clockwork then slowly one day they just disappeared and lost their priority they no longer had any signifigance and i don,t know why that is and i can truly say i was much more patient and tolerant 5 yrs ago then i am now and you know what, it bothers me

I think the BIGGEST REASON i lost the quality of patience is i lost myself through drinking and drugging it totally made me become a different person, i was no longer human, i was,nt recognizable an it scared me but i lost the one thing i lived by - being true to yourself - patience came afterwards but once i lost the patince i knew it wouldn' be long before i lost myself - this went on for anothr 3 yrs until i gave up and i was never the same, the patience never re-surfaced
 
It will come back Rich... but you have to work at it each and every day.. it is not something that just comes, you have to be self aware..

I emailed it to you :

p.s. Rich, just out of curiosity, do you read other members threads/posts? - that might help you :)
 
I do make an honest effort working on my patience but i go right back to old ways when something doesn't go my way , and this is not conciesce either its almost knee jerk, i find myself,if you will, angry with just about anything, especially on the phone,i dont like the person i become( no excuse but i have acute PTSD) AT ALL i become vulgar and confrontational and people dont deserve to be treated the way i treat them when im inpatient,it isn't right and i also belittle them and why BECAUSE RICH HAS NO PATIENCE thereforei need to open myself up to be vulnerable and maybe can help me expose the side of me thats clearly afraid, because i think thats the BIGGEST excuse and/or reason why i have no patience-

By the way yes Sandy i do read other threads on here but i notice most of them have a bunch of replies therefore i dont seem to get anything out of them, i tend to get more out of threads that i read and reply to more often then not.
 
It is difficult for you Rich, with your PTSD, I understand :)

My motto in life is to treat other people as I would like them to treat me...

I am not saying that I am a goodie too shoes person... I get mad too sometimes, but I guess I have learnt that I am the only person who feels the hurt, the other person doesn't care...

Life is tough :
 
Hi Rich, I removed your email address from the post you made earlier. Not always a good idea to post your personal details on the web.

Sandy's advice is very good. Print it out and put it somewhere that you visit frequently.

Print this post out too - I did and read it over and over again.

How long does it take to heal.....

Just consider this a very short space of time in your life. If you get this recover right you have a lifetime of living pain free. Get it wrong and there will be more pain. This is a marathon, not a sprint.
 
Fo a long timd i played the victim so people would feel sorry for me or simply leave me alon , no its no longer like tat, yes i have PTSD and its a rough road at times only now i agree with you entirly only i feel thge hurt and they dont.

I tried that mottoo treat others the way you wan to be treated it worked for awhile but after awhile it got olf and yet again i wnt back to my ol ways becaus it was comfortable and safe or so i thought, it never dawned on me i had choices but i was so set in my ways i wasnt aware i could change whenever i was ready.

Change is never easy that much i know but it also takes courage , nothing happens in us good or bad- without courage i know i will fall far short of the mark alot but at least i ty , hats all you can ask for, afterrall whats your alternitive
 
Thank you Jaycey, once again it didnt even dawn on me that i used my email address, today was a a tough day, the wather here here was gorgeous and i was antsy so i went to un sone errands with my wife for a huge mothers da cookout we're having at our home on suday i didnt think anything of it, so off i went, well 5 hours lzte walking here and there in and out of stores, long story short my leg took a beating and my knee is still throbbing...next three days ill be in good shape its supposed to rain.
 
5 hours of walking so early out is a biggie Rich. Don't beat yourself up - you just did too much. It will come. One day things seem impossible and the next you are doing them without even thinking. Slow and steady my friend.
 
I felt so good today though if i thought for second i,d be in the position i'm in because of going out with myh wife i would have said " sorry hun im staying home " also i barely see my wife sh works nights 10 hr nights m-sat so i miss her when shes not around not mention she is around i want to spend all th time i can with her , anyway, i need t slow things down this tne third time i over did it i dont want to hurt myself that would make everything all for nothing i need to be awsar that could bed a perfect oppurtunit to practice patience regardless if my wife wants me to go with her to the store i need to really focus on healing seriously now, from now on.
 
Hey Rich, you are my star babe !

I have to log off now, but I am really grateful to ....

The man who wants to make a difference :)
 
Well done you :)

And you will, because I just know there is a big heart beating inside of you 

Goodnight Rich from one tired little Aussie girl
 
Rich, you could probably get by without prescription pain meds now - try using this instead Tylenol/ibuprofen cocktail. Just over the counter stuff. I am sure you will find it quite adequate provided to stick to the routine.
 
Hey Rich

check out the good news for the 'Daughter' thread you posted to last night and to Kerilyn from the pre op... Kerilyn has posted in the post surgery side now - surgery done.....

hugs, Sunshine
 
Rich, Remember it hasn't been long since surgrey. I do know you are tired of hearing this but this is very major and the body does need time to heal and get stronger. But its coming and you are doing great. I like Sandy saying "Treat people like you like being treated." It helps me accept my short coming. take care and be safe. :doggieshmooze:Tashia:friends:
 
Thank you tashia, sometimes i need to be reminded, on days i feel good i tend to forget that i just had major surgery and i almost aways overdue it and pay the price end up being sore,i will keep in mind from now on about how critical it is to be gentle with myself as im just early in my recovery, again thank you tashia for the friendly reminder.
 
Rich, did you try Jo's recommended cocktail? Hope things are easing for you!
 
I knew once my surgery was overwith and the days were furthe and furte away from such surgery the post would stop or fade, oh well, i hope my closetspeople i stay close to are doing well, i miss hearing from you, i know you know who you are, i hope you,re doing well, i'm having an ok day today, my hip is sore and throbbing a little bit, i'll get over it like i always do, anyway take care, i hope to hear from my friends soon.
 
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