OP
OP
hopefaith
post-grad
@bottomshollow welcome! and good idea!
TKR Hopefaith's Ups and Downs of Recovery
- Thread starter hopefaith
- Start date
bottomshollow
Former BoneSmart staff member
tiredwife
alpha
@hopefaith Sometimes you just have to do something calming! We often drive through a close-by State Park because it calms us, even if it is to hot to get out, it is calming just to drive through.
71Beetle
post-grad
@hopefaith
Just checking in to say hello and see how you are doing. Hope you are felling a bit better. Never worry about whining on the forum. If you can't do it here where the heck can you! We are here to cheer you up when we can and offer advice when we can and sometimes, just to be an ear or a shoulder for you.
With regards to doing something, are you feeling well enough to garden? Do you have a hobby you have been neglecting for a while that you can get back into? Depending on your mobility, how about going to an art show, a museum or even the library. A change of scenery that does not cost a lot where other people go solo.
Hope you are doing okay. I am thinking of you.
xox
Just checking in to say hello and see how you are doing. Hope you are felling a bit better. Never worry about whining on the forum. If you can't do it here where the heck can you! We are here to cheer you up when we can and offer advice when we can and sometimes, just to be an ear or a shoulder for you.
With regards to doing something, are you feeling well enough to garden? Do you have a hobby you have been neglecting for a while that you can get back into? Depending on your mobility, how about going to an art show, a museum or even the library. A change of scenery that does not cost a lot where other people go solo.
Hope you are doing okay. I am thinking of you.
xox
OP
OP
hopefaith
post-grad
Thanks @71Beetle
It's 4:30 a.m. wide awake.
Gardening? I have done a little. My mobility has increased greatly since changing PT's. It has been amazing not to need my crutch except at night if I get up. So, probably my frustration is a good thing in a way. "Olivia", my knee's name starting gripping a bit yesterday after I had done more, so I listen to her, but she is way happier lately.
My sadness comes from my life circumstances right now. It is a process. Grief is not a "move on". In fact if we do that it'll come back and bite us in the butt later. I definitely know that from going through a lot of therapy.
I know I will heal, but it is time and letting myself grieve. (I just lost about 5 sentences. :( )
I received a call from a Pediatric home nursing Company yesterday. They are going to connect with me in 3 weeks about working very part time. I am interested because I love Pediatrics, and they have some interesting cases that may be a fit.
I don't talk about this but I am unable to work very many hours, especially now. That is just true.
Also, I have not talked much about my relationship with my older son, it is very difficult, and makes me very sad. I am unable to talk to him about it right now, because he is dealing with a lot of his own stuff around me from way back. (like I said it'll come back and bite you in the butt later) I had a card awhile back that said "If you can cry about it when it happens you can smile about it when it is over." I really like that. I realise that people have very different views on processing rough times. That is okay. This is how I process. It is who I am.
This is a loooong post.
So, that is how I am right now. Thank you for "listening" ( I love the UK way of using "s"'s, so I do it sometimes...@dogwheels will appreciate it )
x x x
~hopefaith
It's 4:30 a.m. wide awake.
Gardening? I have done a little. My mobility has increased greatly since changing PT's. It has been amazing not to need my crutch except at night if I get up. So, probably my frustration is a good thing in a way. "Olivia", my knee's name starting gripping a bit yesterday after I had done more, so I listen to her, but she is way happier lately.
My sadness comes from my life circumstances right now. It is a process. Grief is not a "move on". In fact if we do that it'll come back and bite us in the butt later. I definitely know that from going through a lot of therapy.
I know I will heal, but it is time and letting myself grieve. (I just lost about 5 sentences. :( )
I received a call from a Pediatric home nursing Company yesterday. They are going to connect with me in 3 weeks about working very part time. I am interested because I love Pediatrics, and they have some interesting cases that may be a fit.
I don't talk about this but I am unable to work very many hours, especially now. That is just true.
Also, I have not talked much about my relationship with my older son, it is very difficult, and makes me very sad. I am unable to talk to him about it right now, because he is dealing with a lot of his own stuff around me from way back. (like I said it'll come back and bite you in the butt later) I had a card awhile back that said "If you can cry about it when it happens you can smile about it when it is over." I really like that. I realise that people have very different views on processing rough times. That is okay. This is how I process. It is who I am.
This is a loooong post.
So, that is how I am right now. Thank you for "listening" ( I love the UK way of using "s"'s, so I do it sometimes...@dogwheels will appreciate it
)x x x
~hopefaith
OP
OP
hopefaith
post-grad
Knee update. I see my OS Monday again, since he was so unhappy with my progress. My bend has increased since last visit......I don't think he will talk MUA. I wouldn't want that for many reasons.
I am more mobile, still do not have the bend I think I should, but you all, and I love you all, encourage me all the time to not compare and it is my recovery. I feel a little more confident in my new knee. My PT says that it takes time for some people (me) to believe that my new knee can do what my old knee couldn't. He says I have Phantom pain....isn't that weird? (for an old knee that was almost completely torn up?) Whatever he is doing is working. An addition to regular exercises, which he has me do a lot of, and I have to say "no more" when he pushes me a little too much, he has me do things to calm my CNS down. I think I already said that a couple of weeks ago....sorry if this is redundant.
So, very early morning and two very looong posts.
x x x o o o
~hopefaith
I am more mobile, still do not have the bend I think I should, but you all, and I love you all, encourage me all the time to not compare and it is my recovery. I feel a little more confident in my new knee. My PT says that it takes time for some people (me) to believe that my new knee can do what my old knee couldn't. He says I have Phantom pain....isn't that weird? (for an old knee that was almost completely torn up?) Whatever he is doing is working. An addition to regular exercises, which he has me do a lot of, and I have to say "no more" when he pushes me a little too much, he has me do things to calm my CNS down. I think I already said that a couple of weeks ago....sorry if this is redundant.
So, very early morning and two very looong posts.
x x x o o o
~hopefaith
Jozilla
supremo
Big cyber hugs to you! You have had so much to deal with @hopefaith. You offer so much good advice and kind words to others. Be kind to yourself. You so deserve it! We cannot change our past but we can do better in the future. Our pain has helped make us who we are. Emotionally this surgery will try and bring you down but you have had to deal with so much more. Rant away -- we will do our best to help you! Xoxo JoAnne
busylizzie
post-grad
@hopefaith, big hugs going your way also. You are dealing with so much at the moment. I have been reading threads but haven't been posting much. It doesn't mean that I haven't been thinking about you. Even a few hours work a week may worth trying and may be the step forward you need. If it doesn't work out what have you lost? Slowly slowly does it, baby steps, as we say on Bonesmart
Try and get some rest and sleep. Take Care
Try and get some rest and sleep. Take Care
OP
OP
hopefaith
post-grad
@Jozilla and @busylizzie
Thank you for your kind words. It really does help to hear from you all. Yes, I have trouble being kind to myself. There are many reasons for that. Forgiving myself doesn't come easy at all and I have a lot to forgive myself for.
I often wish my thread was more "happy". Sometimes, it is.
~hopefaith
Thank you for your kind words. It really does help to hear from you all. Yes, I have trouble being kind to myself. There are many reasons for that. Forgiving myself doesn't come easy at all and I have a lot to forgive myself for.
I often wish my thread was more "happy". Sometimes, it is.
~hopefaith
tiredwife
alpha
@hopefaith All we can do is take one day at a time, and do what we can. Nobody should expect more of us, not even ourselves! Each day is a new beginning. Hope that you gain strength each day.
OP
OP
hopefaith
post-grad
@tiredwife You are so right. I have trouble truly doing that! I look down the road and worry worry worry.
I have my own saying " I love that the sun rises in the east." Every day is new.
~h.f.
I have my own saying " I love that the sun rises in the east." Every day is new.
~h.f.
Phil75070
post-grad
tiredwife
alpha
@hopefaith I have always like the saying:
God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can and the widsom to know the difference. We all have 'I wish I would have' or 'I wish I wouldn't have' but it is in the past, do what we can to change things, but accept that we can't rewrite the past.
@Phil75070 Behave yourself!
God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can and the widsom to know the difference. We all have 'I wish I would have' or 'I wish I wouldn't have' but it is in the past, do what we can to change things, but accept that we can't rewrite the past.
@Phil75070 Behave yourself!
Phil75070
post-grad
tiredwife
alpha
@Phil75070 LOL
OP
OP
hopefaith
post-grad
(I always wondered why people didn't like spam.)
busylizzie
post-grad
Monty Python's spam sketch and the spam song!
![[Bonesmart.org] Hopefaith's Ups and Downs of Recovery](https://bonesmart.org/forum/attachments/monty_python_spam-jpg.24035/ "[Bonesmart.org] Hopefaith's Ups and Downs of Recovery")
Jozilla
supremo
Beautifully put @tiredwife Would of, could have, should of. I think we all beat ourselves up. My counselor helped me the most with "what if". She said they were the worse two words in our language! I have had two serious meltdowns in my life and never know if they will happen again. It is very difficult to change our personality and way of thinking. I try to keep things in balance daily - some days are more successful than others. I don't know how I would have made it thru recovery had I been challenged with other things. I do hope you get the pediatric job. It sounds like it would be great. I give all nurses a ton of credit for what they are able to do every day and know that has also got to be stressful. When icwas recovering from my first tkr i watched a lit if what i called stupid shows. Breaking Bad, Sons of Anarchy , Justified. I found a sense of humor in them and didn't take a lit if concentration. I am planning on watch all of Breaking Bad as i thought it looked the mist entertaining. Take care and i will be checking on you later. I usually read a lot even if i dont post! Xoxoxo
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DogLoverx3
post-grad
- Joined
- Jan 5, 2014
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I'm excited for your pediatrics home care job in the future. That sounds like a wonderful fit for you!
So glad your knee and mobility are getting better!!!
I'm sorry about all the other things going on in your life right now, my friend. I know it's hard and some days it feels like you're getting buried by it, but you're a strong and good hearted woman. You will get through it all and be better for it in the long run. It just sucks while it's going on is all. xoxoxoxoxo
So glad your knee and mobility are getting better!!!
I'm sorry about all the other things going on in your life right now, my friend. I know it's hard and some days it feels like you're getting buried by it, but you're a strong and good hearted woman. You will get through it all and be better for it in the long run. It just sucks while it's going on is all. xoxoxoxoxo
