TKR Everything Comes to She Who Waits

[patient 99]

Hi Dorothy, how you getting on with your new exercise regime?

 

[patient 99]

Dorothy, I see you are online. I'd love to stay for a chat, but my neck ache is really bad. The only place I can get some relief is bed so that's where I am heading (its 8.45pm here) - never did get round to getting an IPad and its too awkward to use my laptop in bed. xx Carol

 

[Dabber]

I don't know

Oh dear Dorothy, hugs. I do know where you're coming from. I've arranged tomorrow to go car, train, bus to where I take language lessons, or did in my pre-op life. My post-op brain will have to search cobwebby corners to muster up some French; then I said I'd trot across the CITY to have coffee, that means another bus, escalators and a long Saturday queue, then reverse the journey.

Why?? Because like you I want to feel some semblance of normality. My Dh is coming with me, even after I chained him to the ironing mountain today, bless.

I am so sorry to hear about your neck, I strongly suspect mine is the same and also my left shoulder. I guess the osteoarthritis gets everywhere. I simply can't face finding out so you're braver than I. What did the Dr prescribe?

Monday you need to prepare for big time, rest, elevate and ice during the afternoon and have a footstool ready. How old is he? Nappies and bad knees are a no.

Big gentle hugs friend.
Sue.

 

[Dabber]

Carol how are you today? Do you have much pain or has it settled a little over night?
Sue

 

[Toothfairy]

Good morning Carol,
I'm sorry you had such a rotten day yesterday. Sometimes life just seems to give us a good kicking when we are down.
I hope you had a good nights sleep and feel better today.

Good for you getting the job and getting on with life. You are taking control. Go girl.
How old is the little one you will be minding?

Have a good weekend.
Toothfairy x

 

[patient 99]

Hi Sue, my neck is really causing me problems still. All the doctor has suggested is paracetomol. I don't know if its something that will pass after a few days or whether this is just something else I will have to learn to live with.

To be honest I don't think its fair to others to go on about it. I remember before all this stuff started that I used to back off from folk who only wanted to talk about their ailments. Now here I am talking about my ailments.

The little boy I'm looking after for a couple of hours on Monday is just turned 7. The problem is that prior to TKR I used to play with him when I was taking care of him. Quite vigorous stuff. We'd make dens out of the sofa cushions and such like. He still expects the same and I hate to disappoint him. Do you find something similar with your grandkids? Carol

 

[Dabber]

Hi Carol, don't worry in the least about sharing your pain, that's exactly what we can do here.

My older grandchildren are fairly aware of how fragile granny is but the younger ones want me to run and play. I don't like being in sole charge of little ones because I know how quickly they move and how slowly I move. Can you find something nice and engrossing for him to do, or a DVD? Usually by 7 they like some extra computer time although play like you used to do is really the best. What about doing some cooking?
I'm on the train now, I've said I won't do the coffee bit. Why do we find ourselves agreeing to do what our heads want but bodies can't manage?

Sue

 

[Mutley]

Sorry to hear of your horrible day Carol I understand your need to " get back to normal" HOWEVER, it seems for you & I & a few others, there is " No Normal" at this point in time. There is a lot of " Different", for example, today has been very DIFFERENT than yesterday, but " Normal" is not quite there in our vocabulary...
I think you haven't quite got the balance between wanting to do a little more in your day, to make you feel like a part of the human race again, and doing TOO MUCH. I UNDERSTAND implicitly how frustrating this is, as this is my topic of conversation almost everyday at NINE MONTHS post op. will the child be in bed on a Monday evening while you look after him? Can you not take round a bag of frozen sweet corn & use that time to keep icing & elevating your knee? You might not think it needs it however it will do it absolutely NO HARM to be well rested & iced for a few hours.
I will be making a report/moan/ whine on my thread in due course. Josephine, you have been warned...!
Whoops! Your other post came in before I'd sent mine! So, just because you USED to play rough & tumble doesn't mean you can't do something different. I'm sure an explanation to your young man about having a sore knee after an operation will be taken on board. Therefore, why not ask him what board games he really enjoys but his mum doesn't?! Suggest he chooses a different one each week where you can still be sitting with your leg up. I'm sure there are loads of things he would like to do, you just both need to think about it & come up with a plan!
Would it be worth getting a neck brace thingy to keep your head straight? Even wearing it for a few hours might help....

 

[patient 99]

Hi Jaki, Sue, TF and Dorothy

 

[patient 99]

Why do we find ourselves agreeing to do what our heads want but bodies can't manage?

Sue, I think its classic stuff. I'm convinced there is a book somewhere on getting old. I am on page 207. Its all to do with the brain not aging at the same rate as the body. Or at least that's how the brain perceives it. Also I know for certain that a lot of the time I am in denial - this stuff happens to other people NOT to me. Thanks for your ideas re Ollie (the 7 yr old). How did you get on with your language class? Were you as rusty as you thought you'd be? Carol

 

[patient 99]

for you & I & a few others, there is " No Normal"

Well I am just not having it. Who singled us out to be martyrs? Whose in charge? I want to have a few words with him, her or it. Its not fair I tell you. Its just not fair.

You are right about my not getting the balance right when it comes to what I can/cannot do. But Jaki its hard isn't it. Also I might try the neck brace, early days yet, will see how it goes (with that and the compression stocking I will look a treat. Thanks for all the advice re my 7yr old charge.

You said you were going to send a message to Josephine. Presumably its to do with the continuing pain? I'm clutching at straws I know, but have you tried support/compression stockings. In the end you try anything if you think there is the remotest chance it will help.

Oh what a gloomy message. Hope to get my mojo back soon. Carol

 

[patient 99]

Hi Dorothy, After a terrible start to the day, things did improve. How are you getting on with your new exercises? Carol

 

[Dabber]

Well you know I had my silly head on, it couldn't speak much French, I searched the floor in vain for inspiration then blamed the knee and THEN walked across town for coffee. Tonight and tomorrow will be elevate and ice, in fact Dh threw an icepack at me before he scurried out to the beer festival in our town with son2. He did allow the purchase of a couple of magazines as I wasn't going
I walk with my head down, you mentioned this, it's so I don't fall flat on my face as I'm inclined to do with or without TKR, I don't think it does the neck much good.
Have a search on the internet for pencil and paper games, you may find ones we used to love before the computer age and you could sit at the table to do them.
Sue

 

[turtle68]

Hi Carol, Jaki, and Sue,

Just got home from doing "normal" things - Costco, drive by new house, and stopping at Sporting Goods store to buy new knee support. This one was only $15.00 so I can afford to lose it. While walking around costco, it felt like I was dragging around a gallon jug of water in my knee, so it really helped there. Icing and elevating now.

House is looking good, we'll find out more Friday but I think we're still on target for the beginning of Nov. Glad to hear your day has improved. When I logged on 1st thing this morning, I didn't feel so hot, but the day always seems to get better as it goes along. Haven't done my exercises yet today but will later after swelling is down. Like you still trying to find that balance. I had the neck thing for years and it seemed to come and go. Finally I had a cervical fusion, and that was instant relief. My husband has been dealing with that off and on - Have you tried icing. I used to put a little gel pack around my neck tied in a tea towel and wear it around the house, and it really helped. And don't ever to be afraid to talk about your pain. I went for years where I would go to the doctor and say everything was "fine" until I finally realized why I was going.

Sue sounds like you had quite a trek around town. And you're right about the oa going everywhere, if I told you my medical history you would be shocked. I seemed to get it early in life, I thinks it's why I can't stand pain now. I would never take meds, just kept myself constantly busy as a diversion. That doessn't work so well for me now. I try to control it but I seem to like to whine alot.

Jaki are you still packing or waiting until closer to move. I'm sure you will be glad when that's all over. I think writing to Josephine in great detail is a good idea. I was reading someone's thread where she responded, I forget how far along they were in their recovery but a good ways, that there was either loosening or an infection if there was still swelling. I feel much better now that the problem of loosening in the PCL and hopefully the water therapy will build up the quads where they have gotten weak from having to rest so much.

Dorothy

 

[RestAssured]

Carol,

You are 66, I am 48. Someone told me that I can't compare myself to people who "are aging more gracefully than me," ,
But I will let you in on a little secret! I have a herniated disc and two crushed discs in my neck. If I turn my neck instead of my whole body when talking to my hubby in bed, pain shoots through me as though a knife were stabbing me. So see, you have someone who understands! One of these days it may drive me to drink, but not yet!

 

[patient 99]

Finally I had a cervical fusion,

Dorothy, I googled this and my blood turned cold. It had a list of the possible complications, not least of which being damage to vocal chords which could affect speech. If they took that from me they may as well put a gun to my head. Reading on it said normally 6 weeks recovery, but for some people it can take 6 months to a year - sound familiar.

In the past I have always thought that if something was wrong, you took yourself off and got it sorted. That was ignorance. I now know that you don't march in with a problem, they fix it and that's it all sorted. For me to consider cervical fusion I would have to be in agony 24/7.

Again I remain amazed. You just chuck this one in - oh BTW I've had a cervical fusion. I am a dwarf in the land of giants. Carol

 

[turtle68]

Carol,I'm sorry I didn't mean to scare you. It was the best surgery i ever had and gave me instant pain relief. I'd been going to a pain management dr. and he referred me for the surgery, and it was barely six weeks before I was recovered. The hardest part was wearing the neck brace and not being able to drive for that period of time. Hope your neck pain is better and that your babysitting chores go well tomorrrow. I'm just baely awake so will post more later,

 

[patient 99]

Hi Dorothy, I think the problem with me is that my TKR was the only surgery I've ever had (apart from a broken wrist). As its been slow to recover and other things have piled in to compound the problem, I am very wary of having more - particularly as I was never brave to start with.

 

[Toothfairy]

Hi Carol,
Anyone who has had knee replacement surgery is brave in my opinion, that includes you,
Toothfairy x

 

[patient 99]

To be honest TF I didn't have a clue. I hadn't found BS at the time. You could have written on the back of a postage stamp what I knew about it. So thanks, but I wasn't brave. But I'll save your compliment for next time. I hope there are 2 strong chaps at the surgery door to stop me doing a runner (OK a fast walk then).

Just out of curiosity is there anything in particular that is making things a bit easier for you right now? Carol