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Depression/post-op blues - open for all

The post-op blues is a very real thing. I have found that it is exacerbated by having a major surgery in the fall and winter. I had my first shoulder surgery at the end of November. It was so disheartening to be in pain and have nothing to do but stare outside at the rain and snow. Very depressing and progress seems to slow to a crawl.

Since then, I have really tried to have major surgeries (everything but a scope) done in the late spring or summer. I have found that having friends or family around to take me outside is very beneficial. When I had the OATS done last year and was on crutches for two months, my dad came up to help me out. In addition to dropping me off at school, we went fishing. Granted, he would have to carry everything for me, but it was a great thing forgetting about surgery for a bit.

This year, for my partial knee replacement and tibial tubercle transfer (May 30th), I have a ton of stuff to do. I am still going to be coaching (cheering) my t ball team. I am helping with the execution of a big canoe race (by computer). Basically, I am just continuing to do the things I love to do, just in a different capacity.

I have found that if I am busy, I don't have time to dwell on the things that I can't do.

I hope this helps a bit.


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RidgW003 I am sorry I missed this thank you! Yes it does help you know I was going to do mine in Winter as I detest winter and suffer SAD I am glad I didn't now cause I'd be much more down ... I am still looking for the stuff to do that will pick me up.... I wish I had 1 piece of furniture in my living room that wasn't super low... I think this would stink less if I could get up and down on my own in the living room I bet the fishing was fun with dad
 
Fishing with my dad is always a good time. Takes me back to my youth.

My wife has to travel this year for a week right after my surgery so the old man is coming up to help with them and me. I think during the day we may try it again.

Another couple of ideas. I really only watch one show religiously, I have purposely skipped the last several weeks so I can have some catch-up to do. I do the same thing with some podcasts I listen to. Might even pick some new ones based on things I WANT to be able to do once recovered (anybody know any podcasts about crocodile wrestling?). This is also a great time to plan a coming out adventure. I am planning a 340 mile canoe race next year.

There's so many things that I can accomplish in my "off-season" that I simply wouldn't have time for otherwise.

Living in Seattle, we see the SAD quite often so I can really identify with that.

Just try to keep yourself engaged with whatever you can and that glass will start appearing to be half full again.

If you do feel yourself getting down, it may be a good idea to just pick up the phone and be brutally honest about your feelings with a friend or loved one.

I hope this helps, and I am always available by message or email if you need someone who knows what it's like.

Matt


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MyAussieGirl said:
I wish I had 1 piece of furniture in my living room that wasn't super low...
Click to expand...
Put a firm cushion on low furniture to make getting up easier.
ridgw003 said:
If you do feel yourself getting down, it may be a good idea to just pick up the phone and be brutally honest about your feelings with a friend or loved one.
Click to expand...
Great advice Matt.

And if there are no friends and family around - there is always someone here on the BoneSmart forum!
 
Matt you rock and are very kind. I think your family must be very nice and supportive...mine was too. My future but not too far in it is to hit the beach all summer I got a really pretty swim suit today and went to church it was a great day...... I'm all over the place lol... It felt good to get to church see church friends they treated me like gold... I agree with you 100 per cent sometimes you do NEED people to HEAR things aren't going well at that time and being heard helps... I may take you up on the email I really might Thanks
 
Please do! I've been there and done that with a lot of stuff!

Just shoot me a message on here and we will link up via email. I'll probably need some help this summer too!


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Jaycey yo we tried the pillow trick honestly but we think our pillows aren't firm enough so hubby still helps me up and down I appreciate it but sometimes you have to go potty at a time nobody is around that's the stuff that stacks up on me...Thanks you're always there for me and others
 
You are right the cushion needs to be very firm. I bought a firm wedge pillow and used it everywhere post op. It ended up in my car as the bucket seats always hurt my bad back.
 
A big cause of my postoperative depression was traumatic things that occurred in the hospital after the surgery. When the physical therapist came to my house some days later, I cried my eyes out telling her what happened. She was extremely kind to me and I was able to let go of some of the negative feelings. But indeed I was taken aback by the intensity of my depression; I just didn't expect it. Fortunately it lasted only a couple of weeks. The general feeling was helplessness, I think. You go into the surgery feeling relatively well and you come out looking and feeling like you've been run over by a truck. I think that for women who have had previous traumas involving helplessness, surgery can be triggering.

The amazing thing, for me, about hip replacement is that a year later you're not even aware that you have this artificial thing in your body and all the memories of the surgery and convalescence have faded. Walking normally becomes second nature again and it's hard to remember the time when you walked bent over with a cane. The body heals itself, and the mind does as well. You're too busy living to dwell on depression and so on. I honestly remember very little about my recovery period. I remember walking 1 mile at day 10. I remember getting on my bike after 12 weeks. Those great milestones.
 
No Jaycey to clarify when I get on the sofa I want to lay and watch TV I can't have it up and down
 
Thank you too PinkOrchard I think you're right on and make perfect sense ....
 
Believe we have an unbelievable crew of virtual handholders on Bonesmart . I had several from prep, some more though the hand wringing oh what have I done first days, and empathizers and sympathizers as I continue past my one month mark for bilateral THR.
Bless them everyone!!!
 
I've have the best hand holders since I joined Bonesmart.
Several to get me through pre op, more through the horrid first scary days, and sympathizers and empathizers who are still sustaining me as I pass my one month out mark.
Bless you everyone!
 
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