@mainegirl1 I'm sorry to ask you but just wanted to be sure that you have your leg elevated and not just the elevation provided by the recliner? For example, I used a king sized pillow and placed it lengthwise under my entire leg to get more height. You may be able to help move some of your swelling.
Take deep breaths.. deep, as in breathing in to a count of 5, or 3 or 4, whatever is best for you. hold it for another count of 5 then blow out completely, still using the count that's comfortable for you. A series of at least 6 of these could help get your excess swelling to move.
Do this whenever you feel up to it during the day or night. The more supine that I could get in the recliner the more effective this was.. you have lymph nodes seated there in your groin and sitting up too much can cause a restriction of sorts.
You can, after the breathing, place your hands lightly on your upper thigh, right where the crease is in your groin and
lightly stroke upwards towards your naval.
I did this quite a bit post op and while it takes a while for the body to wake up and respond, it will and it will help get things moving.
The reason this can help is because our lymphatic system doesn't have our cardiovascular system to help lymph fluids move.. no assistance from the heart pumping. Our breathing and our actual movements keep it flowing.
If nothing else, this will keep you busy while recuperating.

I am so sorry to read that you are in such pain and that your husband is struggling, too.
Are you going to check in with your surgeon's office? It may be helpful to do so, there may be something they want to tweak.
Your daughter returned to her home, didn't she? Any chance of her coming to help for a few more days?