Today at physio I took my first steps with a cane. Starting bawling with pride
What a dork I can be ... I played national level vball growing up and now I get emotional taking a “big girl step”
Hi tracyes,
Read your thread this morning. You have been through quite a range of ups and downs, probably beyond anything you ever imagined possible before your surgery. Many, of not most of us first-timers, have experienced the same thing. Honestly, I knew it would not be much fun (I had been told that a few times), but I had no idea just how much “not fun” it was really going to be.
Your comment about playing national level ball, then getting emotional about taking your first step with a cane really stood out when I read it. I had my Right TKR 34 days after my 79th birthday. I have been blessed with extremely good health all of my life. All of my Blood work is in range, even cholesterol. I’m “retired”, but still work out of my home office, and travel as required.
So, at 8:30 on the morning of December 10, I checked in at the front desk, an overly self-confident pillar of strength and optimism and bravado. At 12:15, I was an oversteamed carrot. I was totally dependent on everybody for everything. About the only difference from when I was born was that at least now, I could vocalize my desires. I came home on the second day, and for 4 days, my wife had do do everything for me, including lift my leg onto and off of the bed. The first time I was actually able to sit on the side of the bed and raise my leg onto the bed unassisted she said, “WOW, look at you getting into bed by yourself!” That sounds like things I remember saying to my children when they were 2 years old. I was a little sullen for a while.
In spite of generally good health, I have had a bad back all of my life. My knee exercises irritated that enough to drive me to my Chiropractor. There were 4 people in his waiting area with me that had TKR, 2 of them bi-lateral. They all encouraged me to hang in there. They had all been through the same cycles, all had the same “What the heck was I thinking? I should not have done this!” moments.
This will pass, and you will be you again. I can’t exactly say that from personal experience; I’m several weeks behind you. I’m told I am making very good progress. But when I’m thrashing my way through a sleepless night looking for that non-existent comfortable position, or rubbing my leg trying to alleviate that “tooth-achey” feeling, it doesn’t seem like progress. But if I clear my brain a bit, consider that on my first “heel slide” I had to struggle for 6 inches, that I can now walk with very little help from a cane even though my knee is still stiff and sore, I have to admit things really are getting better. Slowly unfortunately. (Patience is not one of my primary virtues.)
So keep moving traceys. One more thing to consider. Everybody is different and unique. Your experience will be unique to you. Apparently, the sleep problem is common to you and me, but one of the people I spoke to in my Chiropractors office said he had no problems whatsoever with sleep. I’m jealous.