Hi Marian, Hoping you can find some moments of peace this weekend. I know it sounds like a simple thing , but have you tried listening to some music that you like? That always helps me when things are overwhelming me. Your family sounds very supportive , that will be a big help in your recovery. Try not to go over all the past problems in your head, that's what makes us crazy. The day of surgery will come and go, and you will have s brand new, good knee in there. Sounds like your new OS will try to keep you as comfortable as possible after surgery too. Thank goodness for ice. I know being sensitive to meds can be a curse sometimes, hopefully they will be able to give you something that works well for you this time.