New here and terrified

[ByGosh]

Hi Butterfly I'm sorry, but I didn't get an alert again that you'd posted a message to me! I don't understand why the alerts don't work sometimes. Well, tech things can be finicky, I guess.

Lands End is supposed to have good suits that are designed for all different body types that you select according to your particular figure. They probably have some of them on sale right about now. You can look at them on-line then call the company for some personalized service and advice. They're very helpful.
https://www.landsend.com/shop/swim/-/N-jl7?cm_re=tab-_-swm-_-070813
Try copying and pasting that in your browser bar and see if it'll bring you to the ladies swim suit page. I just looked them up, and they look great, and are very cheap now - some only $12.99. And their return policy is no-hassle, too. Let me know if it works out for you.

Glad your hanging in there. I love Belleruth Napersteks CD. I think it's very relaxing and helps ease the tension from the pain, and even the pain when I'm listening to it. I hope you like it and it helps you out, too.

I've been listening to one on YouTube by Jon Kabat-Zinn MD, who's the Director of the Stress Reduction Clinic at UMass. He's published books and has many CDs on Mindfull Meditation. The one I listen to is a Body Scan one called Mindfullness with Jon Kabat-Zinn. It's on a meditation CD of his for beginners. It's great, almost 30 mins long, free, and if you look up that title, you should find it on YouTube. I think you'll like it, too. There's others by him there, and also lectures he's given on meditation that are really interesting.

Keep your spirits up - you're getting closer and closer to the date, and you're right, there is a light at the end of your tunnel.

 

[Butterfly]

ByGosh I'm ordering the Belleruth Naperstek (couldn't she have an easier name to type?) one about preparing for surgery and one about stress and anxiety and healing-- forgot the actual name of it. I listened to a couple talks by Kabat-Zinn on you-tube TED talks, but they seemed more academic than relaxing -- more about how it works or something. But I've probably been listening to the wrong ones. I think the one I listened to was a talk he gave to some medical convention. I'll try the mindfulness one you mentioned. I used to have some cassette tapes by Bernie Siegel which were very good -- I'm going to see if I can dig them out and find my cassette walkman thing. His specialty is cancer patients, but his healing CDs and relaxation stuff I found very calming.

I went to my hip class today and it only increased my anxiety -- in addition to others, there was a PT there who was telling us all about how to get out of bed, and even demonstrated on a sort of harder surface treatment table how you have to life your body up off the bed using your arms and good leg and put yourself down a little bit more to the edge and sort of turn, and then do it again till you are where you can get up properly and not violate the 90 degree rule or the midline rule.

Trouble is, I HAVE NO GOOD leg. I have a very bad leg and a very much worse leg. I'm having the worst one done and then the other 5 weeks later. I have a hard enough time just turning over in bed. I was hoping that since you've had a bilateral procedure you might know what I can do if I can't do the thing with the alleged good leg. I tried to ask the PT, but it was sort of like talking to a stone wall. She basically said I HAD to do it that way, but my question is, what if I can't? I do not know if she didn't hear me correctly, or didn't care, or what. I am going to try to start working on it and some other things she said to do, but if I get myself into a situation where I can't walk at all, what then? So I don't want to overdo, even at this pre-op stage.

The PT also emphasized the work, work, work, thing, which is contrary to what I've learned here, and I believe what I've learned here. She also didn't say anything about icing, and poo-poo'd the elevation thing. She said you could elevate your knees slightly. Again, contrary to what I've learned here. She said I should have signed up for 6 weeks of pre-op therapy, but I really can't afford that (fairly high co-pay for therapy visits) and I'll need God knows how many weeks of post op therapy. I really can't afford that either. Josephine has said that you really don't need that much PT for a hip replacement, and I figure she knows better, having practiced longer than this PT person has been alive, and she also has some compassion, which this PC person seemed to be lacking. I felt like a little kid being talked to by a grumpy teacher about multiplication tables or something. I just flatly refuse to be part of "assembly line" thinking by the PT. It is my body and I have to live in here.

I also have to go out and buy some equipment (they only provide the walker and a "hip kit" which has a grabber and sock thing, etc., which I already have) and the right kind of chair. I'll get my daughter in law to help me with that stuff after I settle down a bit.

I'm just all frazzled and probably overtired, but I guess I need some advice and encouragement and kind words. If I refuse to fully participate in physical therapy after the first hip, do you think my doctor might refuse to fix the second one?

Peace and love to you, and thank you, and sorry for the long rant.

 

[Butterfly]

Red Shoe I went to my hip class today and i found it very discouraging. I feel like maybe I just need to cry about it, but that always gives me a terrible headache. I wrote to ByGosh about it to ask for advice because she had bilateral replacements and most of my issue is about what they were saying I have to do with my good leg or else, and I DON"T HAVE A GOOD LEG, just a very bad one and a worse one. I am just discouraged right now. I need a hug.

Peace and love.

 

[Poppet]

bottomshollow... Luuuuv those bathers.. In this so called land of sunshine one would think one could purchase stylish swimwear.... no! We are boring... We, and those prices... Just a very plain swimsuit here is at least $100 AU!

 

[glynis]

Dear Butterfly

I'm sorry you are so concerned about your upcoming surgery. My initial surgery was the result of an accident abroad, so I didn't have time to work up any true head of worry about it before the cannula was IN and I was OUT. I can honestly say that the surgery was no big deal. I had some pain for a day or two afterwards, of course, but was recovered enough after 12 days to tackle the long-haul journey home, which was 24 hours door-to-door.

But I do understand your extra concern about not having a really good, strong leg to do its share of the work. I have no experience of that, and from the sounds of the unsatisfactory session you had with that arrogant physio, neither did she. I've come across many of her type before. I bet she came top in all the training classes she's ever been to, but somehow managed to be Absent when they were doing Caring, Compassion, or Common Sense. I bet she also had that sort of smarmy way with her, didn't she? Little half smiles and you can tell she is thinking: "I'm so bored here. Why do they have to bother me with patients? I'd rather be out with my mates telling them how the entire physiotherapy service in New Mexico would be unable to function without me." Nuke 'em, I reckon.

Is there a possibility that someone else will be on duty when you actually go for your sessions? When I have a major worry in life I always think it right through, decide on what would be the absolute worst outcome, and then say to myself "Glynis" (because it's my name), "Glynis, just allow yourself for one minute to believe that this bad thing just Might Not Happen." Not very scientific, I know, but it sort of gives me a moment's p-a-u-s-e in the
general overall onslaught of concerns.

You told me on another thread that you live quite near Tijeras. I spent a few days there a couple of years ago, having travelled from LA on the Southwest Chief. Wow! Some landscape. I liked Albuquerque. It seemed to have a very cool vibe (man). (Hark at me, the 63-year-old, with her cool vibes...)

All the best.

Glynis

 

[zauberflöte]

{{{((( Butterfly )))}}} awwww I know that feeling, and please, please, there's no need to apologize for ranting-- we all need someplace safe to vent and right here on Bone Smart is it! I always like to keep in mind that everything we say here is going to help untold numbers of people we'll never meet. You will cope, and do fine, because your hip will talk to you about what's best, and you will get around in your own fashion! (PS I'm another one who can't have a good cry because of the splitting headache that pays me back)

I had anterior approach, so getting in and out of bed didn't require any attention to 90 degrees. I think your PT was locked into the company line, and never having experienced this herself couldn't visualize/feel with her own body where you're coming from. I would think that so long as you don't violate those restrictions, or fall off the bed, you can get out however you can (that's not medical advice tho )-- and that's what you might want to practise? Your own best way? By the time you have the second hip done you will be amazed at how strong (and of course bone-pain-FREE) your new hip is!

I'm going to tag Littlejem , who had a bad and a worse hip to deal with, three months apart-- she's on the other side of both now, but I hope she can shed some light on the getting out of bed issue for you!
And you know?-- some people sleep in their recliners for awhile. I don't have one, but perhaps you do?

As to the "pre-hab", it can be helpful, or it can not make any difference to your immediate aftermath. I was able to do about 6 months of a lower body routine, and it did help me immediately post-op, but I would have gotten along fine without it, too. HowEver-- if my hips were as bad as yours, I wouldn't have been able to do a lick of exercise, so it would have been moot. I did do my simple PT exercises diligently for about 4 weeks post-op, and they did help tremendously. I wasn't walking miles a day, and the simple exercises prevented me getting all stiff, and did wonders for helping the muscles remember what they had known how to do before. I only had three home PT visits before I found out they weren't covered at all (!), and all he did was run me through my paces, ask to check my incision, and watch me walk. Those three visits were more than enough to get me started on my own, and I was pretty darn motivated to continue.

After 4 weeks I did more walking and ordinary activities, and not much PT, till one out-patient visit at 8 weeks, where I learned the next set of exercises. I haven't been doing those much either LOL. I've been doing the "walking cure", and it's fabulous! I think my body will tell me when to start with the exercising again.

Any chair can be the right kind of chair provided the seat is raised with a cushion. Some hippies have raised a chair and couch with risers under the feet. I was most comfortable in a chair that had head support (after I graduated from the couch!)

And PT to the contrary, you will probably find that icing and elevating (read the articles in there library here, too) are a wonderful addition to your recovery toolkit!

Sorry, I've gone on and on, but we all want you to have the best experience you can, and we'll storm the gates for you until you DO have that good experience!

 

[Littlejem]

Hi Butterfly please don't get yourself stressed out about this, I know it sounds awful, but really, it will all be ok! I was much more stressed about the first surgery than the second and didn't 'stick to the rules' much second time round!! I'm breaking the 90% rule all the time and have been for a few weeks now, I'm sleeping on my sides, another broken rule and I'm constantly bending to pick things up off the floor!! Moving in and out of bed for the first few days is hard, both times, you have an operated leg that feels like a lump of cement and trying to move it can be very hard work even with a good 'second leg' but you will manage it I promise, you can find ways of doing things for yourself, little tricks to get round not being able to bend too much. I was up walking within 24 hours and onto just canes by day 3. I found recovery much harder the second time for the first 2 weeks, then something changed and I got better in leaps and bounds, to at 7 weeks being back at work almost back to my full hours. Take all the painkillers they give you and if you still have any pain ask for more, my hospital were very mean in dishing them out! I can't explain it but I remember saying surgery was nowhere near as bad as I feared it would be and I'm sure you will be the same.

 

[Butterfly]

zauberflöte Littlejem glynis

Thank you all very much for your responses to my meltdown from yesterday about the hip class. Yes, the PT person was exactly as you described -- you must have met her before. AND, she took great delight in telling us it was not the goal in the hospital for us to be pain-free, but "we like to keep you at a 3 or a 4 so you remember you have just had major surgery." Really? Like I am liable to forget that in the hospital??? Or anywhere? She was very "uppity" as my mother used to say, which means she acted like she felt we were a bunch of morons, soon to be her next victims. I especially loved the part where she said we needed to make her job easier. Frankly, I do not give a hoot about making her job easier. I care about making my recovery easier. If she shows up at my room in hospital, I'm going to see if I can ask for someone else. Maybe she was just having a bad day, but she was just the kind of person I react very negatively to on a visceral level.

Anyway . . . I am doing a bit better today emotionally, but my hips are giving me fits from all the walking I did yesterday to and from the class. I know I'll get through this one way or another, especially with the support and caring of you guys and all the other kind people on this forum. Frankly, I don't know what I would have done without it.

I just have to get ahold of myself. Yesterday I was about at the end of my tether, but I've got a better grip today. I will figure out how do do things. Already I cannot bend over to get things off the floor --I use a grabber -- and I am very careful how I sit. A couple of weeks ago, my son fixed my recliner so it does not rock (he put a cinder block under both the front edges so it can't rock forward when I get up, and he put a wooden platform a couple inches high under it so it is a little higher. I think I can get out of it without violating the 90 degree rule. I"ll figure out the straight chair with arms thing, and I guess I'll figure out the stocking thing. I won't have help every single morning after the first week or so, but I'll figure it out. I"ll get that toilet frame (already have a riser), and figure out the shower chair thing. I have one already, but I have an awful time trying to get in and out of the shower. The side of my tub hi high and it is very hard to gt my leg over itand I know I violate the twisting thing to get out of there now.

Thanks again for all your help -- right now I need encouragement and caring. I had worked very hard to work up my courage and confidence, but I stupidly let that PT person kick a big hole in it. Now I just have to build it up again.

Peace and love to us all!

 

[Runaround Sue]

Butterfly this whole journey is like a roller coaster, isn't it? One day you feel fine and then realities hit you and you worry about everything. But you are stronger than you think and you will overcome every problem as it comes along. You can do this, you WILL do this because when you do your whole life will be so much better! You go girl! We are all here for you

 

[Butterfly]

glynis I just read in one of your earlier posts that you fell out of an airplane! How in the world did that happen?

 

[Red Shoe]

Butterfly sorry for the delay in getting back to you angel. My body has decided to melt down before my op. I found the hip class a bit daunting as my legs are rubbish and wondering how they will cope with being relied on. Lets try and look forward now and think in a few weeks it will all be over. Holding a cyber hand out for you lass

 

[Butterfly]

I found my hip[ class a LOT daunting and had sort of an emotional meltdown for about a day and a half. Because I have two bad hips, I KNOW I can't do some of that stuff the PT person said we have to be abale to do or else. (or else, what? I wonder -- does lightning strike and vaporize me right there in the orthopedic ward? Or do I have to stay there until I am 93, or what??? Surely I am not the first one to do this with two bad hips! GRRRRR! I'm still riled up at that woman, but I've been assured by someone who has recently been a patient in that hospital ward that the PTs in the hospital are very kind and gentle.

Anyway, I hope you are doing better with your foot and eye -- I, too, am trying to focus on the "after" picture.

Love and peace to you, my cyber chum

 

[bottomshollow]

Butterfly, cut yourself some slack, honey. Some of those folks who do those pre op classes are more than a bit over the top. You really will not have to pass a special forces type physical to be discharged from the hospital----your insurance company won't pay that much for that long anyway . As long as you're able to walk far enough to get around your house, do some steps (which always turns out to be easier than anyone thinks), and get in and out of a car (which is also not that difficult) and go to the bathroom on your own, they'll be sending you home.

Take care and keep us posted. We care.

 

[Jojool]

Butterfly sounds like your class was a bust! If I were you, I'd be sure to tell someone (dr, hospital) that the class SUCKED! The powers that be need to know that their class leader was horrible. I'd for sure be complaining to someone in power! Thank God for Bonesmart! What about those poor people that took the class and don't know about BS? Poor things!

I got my swimsuit at Kohls. I really like it, covers what it needs to and still looks cute. It's also black with a pattern, so it's "slimming" too.

 

[glynis]

Butterfly I'd be happy to tell you about my accident, but, how long have you got? It was quite an epic - to me, anyway. Here are some edited highlights...

My career is in children's publishing, and I have written many articles on great mysteries of the world - Stonehenge, Bermuda Triangle, that sort of thing. I'd always wanted to see the Nazca Lines in the Atacama Desert in Peru (loads of info on the internet if you don't know of them), and on New Year's Eve, 2009, finally got my chance.

Our guide had advised us to go for an early morning flight, as viewing conditions would be better, and we did indeed have excellent views. As it came in to land, our small plane had a puncture on the runway, and we skewed about a bit, on and off the grass verges. But we soon came to a stop, seemed to be in no danger, and weren't at all worried. However, as it was classed as "an incident" the rule was that the full Emergency Evacuation procedure had to be put into operation.

In brief, I fell, and had to be stretchered off the runway, with - incongruously - a TV cameraman capturing every minute. Apparently I made the 9 o'clock news in Lima, but I never saw the broadcast.

Leaving some boring bits out here, my next stop was the general hospital in the small town of Nazca. Here, they glued together 2 pieces of broken glass to make a plate for the X-ray machine, evacuated more or less the entire hospital, and left me in a room with this ancient behemoth of a machine, rumbling, grunting and grumbling as it went about its work. My husband spotted Marie Curie behind it, winding it up.

The X-ray was held up to a naked bulb, and someone - a doctor? - said what everyone in the room already knew. They couldn't help me there. They would have to get me to Lima, some 8 hours away by road.

Help was offered, with the provision of a small private plane. They took some seats out of the back and slid me in on my current stretcher (one of the 8 I was on during the whole day). The flight was across the Andes, and there was a lot of turbulence. At one point I rose right up off the stretcher, like a levitation act. And, as you know, what goes up...

We had assumed that the plane would take up to Lima International Airport. Er... no... There was some reason it couldn't land there (no security clearance, or somesuch), so we landed at a military airfield some distance away. It was very reminiscent of the final scene of Casablanca, where Humphrey Bogart and Claude Rains walk through the mist between the serried ranks of old bombers.

After 45 minutes grappling with the language barrier, I was loaded into the back of an ancient "ambulance", and we set off on the 4-hour journey by road to Lima. The nurse who was assigned to sit with me had a fun afternoon. Admittedly, there was nothing for her to do, and we could not converse. She incessantly grinned at me inanely, and chatted to her mates on her mobile phone.

Once in Lima (6pm by now) we spent 45 minutes in the foyer of a wonderful modern hospital, whilst money matters were discussed. Once inside, and settled in my room, I at last felt safe.

The surgeon said he would operate first thing, but then came back to say that he was sorry, but he did not have the right size prosthesis in store. The op would have to wait. It being New Year's Eve, my husband Graham and I had a couple of glasses of wine, then Graham went off to the hotel the insurance company had recommended, where he was given the Bridal Suite, with a 7 foot bed, and a Jacuzzi.

On Jan 8, a few days after my op, instead of going to the lunch booked at home for 12 people in a nice restaurant - for my 60th birthday - Graham brought me a crusty roll (very hard to find in S America), some nice cheese, a bottle of fizzy wine, and a box of Ferrero Rocher.

Well, you did ask...

 

[cornishhedge]

Hi butterfly,
Thank you for your reply last week. Sorry I took so long in getting back t you. Believe it or not I still !!!! Yes still have the migraine. Phew.!!!!

Anyway your reply about your problems with anxiety. Wow. I think we went to the same school to learn that one lol.
I am the same as you, started panic attacks when I was 26 they went on to happen about 30 times a day at one stage.
I sort of finally worked out what was happening to me. Problem is I don't think you ever get over it. I think you either suffer with anxiety or not.
So my deari certainly am up there with you on the worry side of things. It's driving me crazy everyday worrying about it.
Saw the hypnotherapist on Saturday. Not too sure if its helping to be honest.



I have my appointment tomorrow with the surgeon. It's is the second time because they refused me before.
Won't sleep tonight of course. Even having x ray gets me in a panic!!! I know it sounds silly but it's the truth. I guess I have hospital phobia.
I just have this feeling that. He will get me in quick as I have been on and off the list. Oh boy!!!!
Fear pure fear. Overwhelming pure fear. I do hate it so much. I've been doing relaxation, positive thinking, writing down the worries, o all sorts of things the therapist has suggested. Hmmmmm.

I have read your posts about that awful PT woman. Huh she needs to change her job! Perhaps working in a prison might suit the cruel woman. I wanted to say, I helped my mum when she was like you. She had two bad hips. Well please don't take any notice of what the Gestapo woman said. You sort of find your own way to manage getting to the toilet and out of the bed. Same goes with the shower.
I didn't shower my mum everyday I just gave her a good old wash over. Don't be too fussy it's not for long. Only a few weeks and it all sorts itself out. Just saying that its not so much of a problem as you were lead to believe. Hope I'm making sense here.


I will let you know how it goes tomorrow.

Bye for now
Angie

 

[cornishhedge]

Hi glynis

Well........ I'm here fed up and came across your story. It did make me laugh.you certainly know how to write a story.

Not that I'm laughing at your accident of course. Just your discription of he whole process.

I do hope you are well now. Your also very brave. Very very brave.

Angie

 

[Red Shoe]

Butterfly

 

[Butterfly]

glynis Well, I can certainly say I did not have such an exciting entry into the world of hip replacement! You have a story to tell your grandchildren, for sure. Did anyone think to give you any pain medication while you were bouncing all over Peru? And do you glow in the dark after the Madam Curie incident? I'm sure that though you now can look back on it with humor, the real thing must have been quite harrowing. How long did you have to stay down there?

You are doing all right now, no?

 

[Butterfly]

cornishhedge I like your new avatar! Is that you? I had a haircut exactly like that when I was about that age.

Did you see the doctor again? What did he say? Are you doing OK? Did you get a date yet? I had also hoped for a quick date, but alas -- there is quite the waiting list here.

You are right about that PT person. She belongs in some old black and white prison movie or WWII movie. The only thing she needed was a riding crop to make her the quintessential concentration camp guard.

It bugs me that I let her upset me. There's that old anxiety rising up again.

I hope your mum does well -- it must also be hard for her to see you suffer. I miss my own mother every day, though she has been gone since 1981. She was always my best friend.

I've ordered some relaxation and calming "prepare for surgery" CDs. I'll let you know if they help. I think the thing that helps me most now is having others to chat with on this forum who are going through similar experiences. It makes me feel not so alone to know I can reach out to others who care.

Peace and love to you.