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TKR Need Help and Encouragement, please...

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BEG, My husband has severe heart disease. He has an implanted Defibrillator----he also had v tach last summer and would have died without the ICD. He just dropped down one day and as I looked at him, I thought he was dead---then I saw that he was being shocked. I do understand a little of your pain.

When Bob was in the hospital with five bypass surgery, I stayed in his room--always available for anything he needed. I was exhausted, needless to say. One day, Bob asked if I had been there all along---and I realized that he did not even remember all that I had sacrificed!!! In true red head fashion, I stormed out of his room. I was driving around Missoula, wondering what to do? what to do. I went to the movies. I saw that Cinderella remake with Drew Barrymore. It was wonderful and I loved it.

When I went back to Bob's room, we had something to talk about besides his health and both of us enjoyed it. I realized that I could not let my life morph into his---I had to retain my own life both for my sanity and for our own interest level. I am much more independent now that I was then. I really like myself better this way. Kelly
 
All Right. What a way to go. :happydance: :egypdance: :dancy: :yay: :yes!: :yahoo: :puppysmooze: :puppysmooze: :spin: Being a widow is ruff at first because you have to find how to live a life you didn't want. You did so good. This will help you with everything. Have you hugged your cats today? :kittykiss: :kittykiss: I want a hug Mon. :loll: Do cats like hugs? :heehee: Have a good weekend. Tashia
 
Tashia, Kelly.....you both say the same thing in different ways. :) It is so true, you do have to find yourself, with or without a mate. I let myself morph into him and did not realize that until he was gone. I am so happy you are one step ahead Kelly. I remind myself....everyone in a relationship (at least one of us are going to go through this at sometime in our lives) it is just the way life is. My husband always said we would meet on the other side.

Tashia, you have such a beautiful outlook on things. You make me smile. :)


I have given up trying to understand my knee. One hour the swelling is not too bad and another it is hard andg warm. I just wish I knew what is going on, well I will soon know on the 26th. It will be 12 weeks Monday.
The bend is sooooo slowly getting better. I have no idea how much because I have no one to measure. I guess it is better this way? I just keep doing my stretches. Yesterday I actually went up the stairs alternating feet! It was still a pretty stiff but I was not able to do that a week ago.

What a roller coaster ride...you are all so right!
 
NO one ever measured me! 12 weeks really is early you know, you've a long way to go , plenty of time for improvement.
I'm not sure I could've sat in a theatre at that stage and couldn't do stairs properly. You must be improving even though you can't see it :)
 
Up and down stairs with alternating feet, I'd say you are doing better than you think! :angel:
 
The journal is a great idea!! I hope you are doing better now. I had a really bad OS, changed, and now I have someone who actually listens.
 
[Bonesmart.org] Need Help and Encouragement, please...
matter in recovery. Celebrate each one you attain. Keep a record of them; so on days you're feeling down about your knee, you can look back and see how far you've come.

Take care and keep us posted. We care. [Bonesmart.org] Need Help and Encouragement, please...
 
Oh, I can't go down stairs alternate...not even gonna try that. :scary: I got the nerve to hold onto the banister and go UP the whole flight. Slowly but I was able to do it. :tada:
...it was real stiff but not painful. I know I am not at 90 degrees. That would mean...when sitting my leg could be straight down, right? Nah...still not there but better than what I was. After my fall I was down to about 35.
I am seeing a small change. Thanks everyone, it feels good not to be in so much pain too. :)
 
BEG,
Sounds like you a doing very well now. Amazing how much the right pain meds help. As long as you see some improvment, no matter how large or small, you know you a moving in the right direction. You only have 10 more days to wait now and I hope the time flys by for you.
 
Less pain is always a good thing, glad to hear you are doing better with that. Hopefully your new OS will get you on the road to a better recovery. We all care and wish the best for you... :)
 
I do hope you put that into the journal. You are doing so good in both ways. I want to invite you to the Social Room. I started a thread on being a widow. I invite everyone to join. This is one topic that is avoided because it is painful at first but you do learn by living it and taking one day at a time. So please come and join me there to help one of the biggest things in life that is thrusted upon you. You will make it takes time and patience. And lots of hugs from :kittykiss: :kittykiss:. I had a :puppysmooze: when it happened to me. Come and join me there. Have a good weekend and do take care by going out for tea or coffee. Its ok to go by yourself. :friends: :dancy: :console2: Have you hugged you :kittykiss: :kittykiss: today? :heehee: Tashia
 
BrnEydGrl said:
I know I am not at 90 degrees. That would mean...when sitting my leg could be straight down, right?
Click to expand...
Hi there BEG. Good to know things are getting there, albeit somewhat slowly! To help you judge, this is a chart of degrees at the knee - hope it helps ...
[Bonesmart.org] Need Help and Encouragement, please...

 
BEG, I hope you're having a good day today! Getting to the movies is an excellent thing to do and now you know that you can do it, which made you feel better! :yay: It would be nice if your friend could come out and stay with you a bit, I'm sure that would help her as well!

Stay well and stay positive my BoneSmartie friend, good thing have yet to come! :thumb:
 
Brn, How are you doing today? Here the sun is shinning and will be a great day. I hope in Pennsylvania is also great. What are you up to today? I found that after doing something one day the next day I had to take a easy. How are you :kittykiss: :kittykiss:? Keep in touch. Take care. Tashia
 
Josephine, thanks so much. I am a bit scared. I guess that is normal? I am trying so hard not to think about it but tomorrow is 12 weeks. This waiting to see the new docs is really nerve wracking. This last experience has really damaged me, I was alway strong when it came to any surgery...procedures, anything! My last cancer surgery was 5 1/2 hours! Then again, that doctor made sure I was comfortable. I know it will be different this time but it is pretty fresh.
Tashia, I will check on your widow conversation over on the social board. Thanks. I have been having a couple tough days. I made a mistake and watched a documentary on one of my hubby's favorite bands. I liked them too,The Eagles. I thought I could handle it but I couldn't. Listening to their music was like a time line of our lives together. :hissy:
Anyway, when I get like that I kind of cut myself off. I did notice my knee was hurting more and I thought they were truly linked BUT then I remembered I cleaned the house...vacuumed, dusted..etc to keep myself busy. That may have done it too!:umm:
Right now I am laughing because one of my cats is sitting here right next to the computer watching all the "action" of the smiley figures. hahaha
Again...hugs to all of you for your encouragement....:friends:
 
BrnEydGrl, I know that you are trying to keep busy and that is good to know that. The problem is you knee needs you take a easy. Thats what makes it so hard right now. Please try not to do so much housework. Your knee isn't ready for all that action. Try to do something that you can do sitting. Do you have any hobbies or read books? I know its early but I found that doing something that my husband and I never did made it easier to start the life that I now live. Go slow and One day at a time. :kittykiss: :kittykiss: :friends: :puppysmooze: :console2: :console2: :flwrysmile: Tashia :SUNsmile:
 
BEG, I thought about you this weekend. I think that you are very brave to be going through this all by yourself. I wish that I lived close by and I would come to visit you. I hope you have good luck with the new doctor.
 
Thank you Clovergirl and Tashia. I saw my GP yesterday, he makes me feel so good and so "cared for." He could not believe how "warm" my knee was but the swelling was much better. He said he does not specialize in knee surgery but he will be there to help in any way he can. He let me know he tried calling my surgeon twice and never received a call back. I figured that would happen.
If you don't see me around that much, it is because when I do come here I start "reading" everyone's accounts and so many of them scare me!! If I need more surgery I don't know what I will do. It just shakes me to the bone even thinking about it. You say I am strong, but sometimes I feel very fragile. I know it will be a new circumstance but I just can't even imagine going through any more. I am not that strong.:sad: I am checking into airfares for my friend, yikes, they are ridiculous, I guess it is because of Easter Holiday coming up. :sigh:
Sorry for coming on here so down...it is just a bad day I guess. I am going out for a short walk and some fresh air to try to turn things around.
I should be excited to see the new docs on monday...why am I saw scared?
 
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