MUA My LTKR journey continues to RTKR<

[sistersinhim]

Try not to look at your progress daily. If you do, you won't see any. Look back at a week ago. Remember your progress last Wednesday! 30 points! That's a huge improvement!

Are you seeing any reduction is your swelling yet? How's your back? You are in my prayers.

 

[SusieShoes]

Quitting pain meds that quickly is going to leave you feeling ill, no way around it. I did the same thing, though I quit because of my stomach and gut and was willing to do anything to not feel nauseated all the time. The shakes and the queasy and the just plain feeling sick, it was no fun. But if you've gotten through that, you've gotten through the worst and it can only get better.

This recovery is grinding. It's long. It's slow. It's good some days and not so good on other days, and sometimes it seems you are getting nowhere at all, or even going backward. Keeping an eye on the big picture, the long game, the light at the end of the tunnel... some days that's asking a lot. We forget after several weeks what those first week truly felt like, how painful and grueling, and how very small those early victories were. Incremental, really. We truly do grasp at straws, if that's all we have to grab onto. But those straws add up. The good days come more often and the bad days fewer and farther between. All we have to do is stay with it and try to be patient. Being patient isn't easy. I think it's the hardest part of this recovery.

Here are some more hugs for you!

 

[liam2015]

@becticu ~ i'm in a similar mind-frame as you, only at a later stage in my recovery. my r.o.m. is barely 90 degrees, going into 11 weeks. i actually feel very well physically ~ sleeping better, hardly any pain, (but stiffness after sitting or driving in car) walking up the stairs alternate feet (but pulling myself up with my arms on handrails) and walking quite well in general. however; i'm not noticing much improvement in my bend, can't do a full rotation on bike, etc. i think my swelling might be going down finally, not that it's very much. it's frustrating that it is so difficult to get to the 90 degrees on my own. the physiotherapist and surgeon get it to 95 degrees with pushing. i didn't start physio until the 6th week, so my knee had all that time to, at least partially heal, enough for me to progress ~ but it didn't and i didn't (other than a few degrees).

hang in there and think about how great you'll feel in a few weeks. after reading @bertschb progress chart, i'm hoping i will too. i'm not sure about the pain meds as everyone is different, but maybe you'll feel better once they get out of your system and you can switch to tylenol or something with less side effects. i quit mine at 3 weeks and they took another 2 weeks for me to feel better. enjoy your long weekend.

 

[kmak81230]

Hoping today is a little better for you Becky - and Jenn! You, and the others who have done both either at the same time or when one is still healing, are heroes to me . . . . it is tough when you want to take charge of this and yet our bodies have a different plan in mind. Hope you can negotiate the switch in pain med protocols and begin to feel better soon. I also found @bertschb recovery timeline helpful - but must admit that spending 4.5 mos in the same place gave me pause. One day, one hour, one moment at a time , , , , sending hugs your way

 

[Celle]

Hi Becky,
I hope you're starting to feel better now. It's not even a month since your second TKR, so it was really a bit too soon for quitting the narcotics.
It should have been possible for your surgeon or PCP to prescribe Tramadol, which is a useful step-down drug from the heavy-duty narcotics.

I also decided I had to go off the opioids. I have been on them just days shy of a month. I started cutting the OxyContin from twice a day to once a day and was trying longer stretches between Dilaudid. I actually started to have some withdrawal symptoms which really really scared me. At that point I stopped everything cold turkey. Yesterday was really bad with shakiness, high BP (I usually run low) heart palpitations and nervousness and lots of crying. I am taking Loritab every 4 hours now and putting 1 Tylenol in every 6 hours to help hold. I do have break through pain but I will handle it. The last 3 days were tough but I feel much calmer and stronger today so hoping the worst is behind me. I am being really vulnerable here. I've never had to take the strong meds before these surgeries and I really don't understand the addiction to them.

Quitting pain meds that quickly is going to leave you feeling ill, no way around it.

I'm sorry you had such a bad time, but Susie is right. It's never a good idea to stop too quickly. Cold turkey is not a good idea.
I suspect you were afraid of addiction, but that's not a common problem because you are taking the narcotics for a genuine reason.

Although you had those horrible withdrawal symptoms you weren't addicted. Your body had become habituated, used to taking the narcotics. There's quite a difference between habituation and addiction.
Myth busting: on getting addicted to pain meds
There's a suggested regime for coming off narcotics in the last post in the above article. For the sake of others who don't read the article, here are Jamie's suggestions:

Here is a suggested schedule for cutting back on prescription pain medications. Stay at each level for 3-4 days or even longer if you notice the pain symptoms increasing. This schedule assumes you are starting with one pill every 4 hours before beginning the reduction process.

1 pill every 6 hours and 2 at bedtime
1 pill every 6 hours and 1 1/2 at bedtime
1/2 pill every 4 hours and 1 1/2 at bedtime
1/2 pill every 6 hours and 1 1/2 at bedtime
1/2 pill every 8 hours and 1 1/2 at bedtime
1/2 pill every 8 hours and 1 at bedtime
1 pill if you are really doing something active during the day and 1 at bedtime

It is usually better to wean off these meds over several weeks, not several days. But.....if you are still having pain, then your body is healing and you still need pain relief. And in this case, I would discuss your pain management with your GP instead of your surgeon.​

Becky, what are you taking for pain relief now? You still need to take something.

 

[VW54]

I'm so sorry you're feeling so down or miserable.
I know it won't helpmuch to write "been tbere, done that". I think many of us are frustrated with the slow progress an most of us worry something went wrong.
I hope some rest and sleep despite your sudden quitting of opioid meds will see you through these days , through the worst of sadness.
You asked about acupressure ( not acupuncture!)( i fear needles)
I looked it up on some youtube search and up came some videos showing how to use one's knuckles to press in /in my case to find the right spot for iscias/sciatic pain.

I tried several times. On the third try it worked.

Let us know how you are doing tomorrow, please.

 

[sandi4213]

Becky, I hope you are resting tonight and that tomorrow will be better. Everyone else has given the advice I would, so I will just send you big (hugs) and best wishes for a better tomorrow. <3

 

[becticu]

Thanks @AlaskaGrandy, I love the way we can encourage each other in our ups and downs.

I did choose to go off the opiate pain killers, not really because I was afraid of addiction but I wanted to see if I could do with less like Loritab or Trammadol. My doc (PA) wouldn't prescribe Trammadol because she didn't think it would control my pain. I felt like I couldn't think clear enough on all these meds. I know the way I went off them was too sudden. I did wean a day or two on OxyContin but quit the Diladid cold turkey. I was a tough weekend but I made it and just using Loritab with one Tylenol every six hours and staying at or below the 4000 mg a day. Thanks @Celle for the articles on weaning and I am going to get Trammadol from my GP if possible.

I know each of you knows how I feel because you have felt the same. @Pheebs52 thanks for all the encouraging notes to me.

@sistersinhim I know you have gone through so much more than I have. Thanks for the reminder that I did make progress last week!

Thanks @SusieShoes for the hugs! @VW54 I have looked up and reading on the acupressure. Thanks!

@liam2015, I kind of think like you I am doing better without the strong drugs. If I can keep pain under control like this I will do better.

@kmak81230 and @sandi4213 thanks for hugs and encouragement.

I love how everyone is either putting or updating their profile pictures. I feel like I know you guys but it's so good to put a face to your name. @KarriB i love your new picture!

 

[sistersinhim]

Are you feeling any better today? How's that swelling?

 

[IowaNana]

@becticu - Sending you positive thoughts that you are having a better day. As others have said - this is an up and down, back and forth journey of recovery. I also found it to be isolating from my friends and normal life, which adds to the emotional component for me.


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[becticu]

@IowaNana, I find that to be true as well. I am so limited in what I can do that's it's difficult to do family outings, eat in a restaurant etc. My knee doesn't bend enough to sit at a table more than a few minutes at best. I also have a very active career that I love and I worked the day before surgery and bam haven't worked since March 22. I think what was upsetting to me was I had 2 good weeks between surgeries where I was driving, gardening, cleaning house and fairly normal although not 100%. Then I went right back into it all over again and this time not progressing like I did last time. It really messed with my head. I'm trying to be patient and try and be more positive than negative and most of all have better patience!!


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[KarriB]

If you need a taste of normalcy like eating out, just prop the new knee up in a spare chair or beside you on a booth. I had to do it because of the immbolizer. About once a week my "chauffeur" and I would go out for breakfast or lunch after one of my appointments. With the immbolizer I had to keep the knee straight so I usually opted for a booth and just leaned against the side with my leg up n the booth seat. I can't tell you how it helped my mental and emotional well being to be out and a little normal.

My niece/adopted daughter is in the photo with me. I love her! Thanks, Becky!

 

[knit2tog]

Patience is so hard at times. There are times when I am gentile with myself and then others when I have had enough. I feel the best when I look back over the week and see the progress that has occurred. This has been the hardest recovery I have ever had.

 

[Pheebs52]

Becky, I've been troubled ever since I made those posts yesterday. I feel as though I didn't offer you or Jenn the validation you guys really needed. The heart is in the right place, but the words don't always coalesce to express the appropriate sentiment. Thankfully, tonight, @SusieShoes stated so eloquently what I had hoped to convey yesterday.

I've no doubt that the sudden withdrawal of Dilaudid added to your misery, but I also know it's not the baseline source. I can't help but feel that in your case and Jenn's, having a second knee done so quickly after just beginning to normalize plays a strong part in your troubles, both physically and emotionally. It's a tough road doing just one knee and both of you have had the double-whammy. You both had a few good weeks, and then...BOOM! It's actually easier to have never had something than to have had something and get it taken away.

@sistersinhim made a very important point with respect to measuring progress. In general, we just can't see or feel daily changes, but the weekly changes are often pretty profound. Sometimes, I even try to keep my outlook more long term; monthly or quarterly. I try to focus on just what great things I may be able to do at those more distant points. These goals may not necessarily be accomplished on my fantasy timeline, but I do know they will ultimately be realized if I can just be patient. I am secure in this knowledge from having had my hip replaced, a very lengthy recovery for me. At different points along the road, I just couldn't believe I would ever fully recover. I was wrong.

 

[Red's Mom]

Becky I can empathize with you. My second knee was more difficult than the first and that really played with my mind. I thought I "had it all figured out". These knees seem to have a mind of their own. I hope that you will begin to feel better mentally and physically in the days ahead. It truly is a marathon at a turtles pace. On the up side your procedures are done and soon you will enjoy life with those new knees.

Today I went to the Chicago Botanical Garden. On past visits with the old knees I was always looking for a place to sit. Today I walked all over the place never sitting down and getting to see so much more than before, what a joy! You too will soon benefit from two new knees. I will pray for healing and patience for you.

 

[becticu]

@Pheebs52, oh no I didn't feel that way at all. I always love your posts probably because they aren't always serious and they are fun! Thank you for the serious thoughts as well. I just need to be patient and my mind races ahead to the pending baby girl due any day and my back to work supposed to be the end of the month. I know he won't release me and I have more time but that time is ticking away!!

@Reds Mom, you've been through this as well. You are right, I thought I had it figured out and surely this one would be easier...not! Thanks for the reminder that this will be worth it, it's just going to take time.


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[AlaskaGrandy]

Dearest Becky, my heart truly goes out to you. You are in that Limbo place where time stands still. It seems like this hopeless place will never end. You miss work and your normal active life and wonder if you will ever get back. Hang on to our words of encouragement and love. Keep writing and sharing your true feelings with us, we will be here to support you all the way. If you are spiritual, lift your voice up and He will hear you.

 

[becticu]

Thank you @AlaskaGrandy, you amaze me with your bilaterals. I can't even phathom how that was. I do know that this is a safe haven where you can share if you have just had enough and don't even know how to cope. I also love how everyone comes along beside and helps pick me up and then reminds me that it will be okay and this truly is not the quick sprint I want it to me. You are correct about the spiritual aspect. I know not everyone feels the same way but I know that ultimately that's He is the one seeing me through and giving me the strength. I have spent many a night crying out to Him. Thanks for your encouragement.

 

[bkish]

Hi Becky. I have just followed your postings. Like you, I too had LTKR done in March (14th) and am scheduled RTKR for next Tuesday. I have been enjoying a couple of weeks of pseudo freedom and activity knowing the cycle begins in one week. I did not want to go through it again but, knowing it has to be done, did not want it to be hanging over my head. I want it done so I can start to move foreword again. I understand your feelings of " never ending nightmare" after having gone through it already. For me, the first time was fear of the unknown and now it is fear of the known. But you have been an inspiration to me and I will continue to follow you . Hugs to you and this helps me feel I am really not alone in this fun journey. We all know that there is a light at the end of the tunnel; it's just very hard to see some days. But it is there. And, yes, the spiritual aspect is a huge asset, in my opinion, whatever it personally is individually . So, hang in there; I will be right behind you.


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[sistersinhim]

Becky, you have so many on this site that care about you and are praying for you. You are on the upward side now. So many of us are still facing #2 replacement, but you are through that now! Your body was still down from your first surgery, and now you have a double whammy. But, again, you are through with that second surgery and now it's healing time. And you have the Great Physician on your side. You will use this experience, He is seeing you through, to help others. All things happen for a reason. Try to just think of what a blessing you are to all of us! Because you certainly are!