Thanks, Jamie! In a year's time, I might forget these "little details" and just when and what I was doing at certain stages. There just isn't a lot of info. out there for people that are thinking about, or have been asked to concider a fusion. I know "caneguy" and "awolfpaw" were a GODSEND when they found my post. I remember I cried when FINALLY....somebody who had a fusion was available to me. AND...having 3 different types of fusions here on the site as well and different recoveries and experiences (thankfully, all postivie!) to refer to!
As you know, I was at the end of my rope, and my Dr. and I had "experimented" with everything from drugs, to trying a last ditch surgery in hopes that my life would become better. I think when you have come to the conclusion that life just "stinks", and you would rather just stay in bed, that is the time to concider something more "drastic". I knew I didn't want an amputation, which was also mentioned. I'd rather have my entire leg, foot and toes, thank you! So...once I made the decision, I never looked back and got into the mind-set of actually looking forward to having the fusion. I know that sounds bazaar..."looking forward to having a straight leg"...but that's how I felt.
I had a day last summer when I was in the cast, and I just did the pros and cons. I knew keeping my leg straight and supported caused less pain. I knew that when I was in the cast, I could participate in daily activities, go shopping, enjoy my horses, and even go to the beach. When I didn't wear the cast, I was hunched over, scared to death of falling or having my knee go out from under me, and sitting for more than 5 minutes was impossible. Plus...I kept thinking about being a grandmother someday. How could I hold a baby, or even think about babysitting if I were in this condition? I want to be able to get on the floor and play...to pick my my (future) grandchild and hold him/her. (I get teary eyed just typing this) I knew for safety reasons, I would not be able to do this. That was the ice-breaker! I now had motivation and the DRIVE to do this and never look back.
AND...my daughter and hubby are going to start trying this summer, so maybe by the fall of 2103, I'll be a Grammie!.
