Bilateral THR Aug.18 - a success!

[DeepBreath]

@Hip Hip Hooray! Sending tons of hugs and good thoughts your way, friend. I know today must be difficult.
Wow, the difference in your hips is AMAZING!
(((Hip Hip)))

 

[Horseshoe]

@Hip Hip Hooray!, very interesting to see both x-rays. I'm getting better at reading them and your new ones look amazing. Quite like that the stem has a ledge thingy that sits on top of the femur bone, must give it great stability. Fascinating stuff, thanks for sharing

 

[Hipster Girl]

@Hip Hip Hooray! that had to be tough with the anniversary of your mom's passing, especially right on the heels of Mother's Day.

I'm glad you were able to get to the gym. It sounds like you are doing fantastic - 30 min of cardio plus weights, wow, that is awesome! I know what you mean about the endorphins.

What a neat idea to add baking soda to the liquid soap to make a scrub. It is amazing all the many uses of baking soda. I remember my grandma used to use it for everything from laundry to brushing teeth.

That is exciting about running into your old boyfriend. It sounds like you two are on good terms and it was a good relationship but various life circumstances kinda got in the way. Like they say, timing is everything, and maybe the timing for you two wasn't right back then but maybe it is now? It's good that you have a journal to refer to about your relationship and how you were feeling about it. It sounds like he was a big part of your decision to have THR. I know how the hip problems age us before our time, but now that you are recovered, the age difference wouldn't even matter.

You sound really good. Sounds like things are on the upswing, friend. Very happy for you!

 

[Hip Hip Hooray!]

@Hip Hip Hooray! Sending tons of hugs and good thoughts your way, friend. I know today must be difficult.
Wow, the difference in your hips is AMAZING!
(((Hip Hip)))

Hi @DeepBreath,
Thank you. I actually had a really sweet dream yesterday morning that felt like it was from my mom. So, yesterday was a good day. I know...I'm very impressed with these xrays. Dr. Matta is so exact. I hope you are doing well.

 

[Hip Hip Hooray!]

@Hip Hip Hooray!, very interesting to see both x-rays. I'm getting better at reading them and your new ones look amazing. Quite like that the stem has a ledge thingy that sits on top of the femur bone, must give it great stability. Fascinating stuff, thanks for sharing

Thanks @Horseshoe, Yes, I like that detail on the stem, too. It's interesting to me to see how the ball of the hip joints had moved out of the socket before the surgery. The femurs had shifted, too. I like how the edges are all aligned on the after xray. I've got to find your thread and see how you're doing. I hope all's well.

 

[Hip Hip Hooray!]

Hi @Hipster Girl, Yes that scrub with baking soda and liquid soap does an excellent job. I'm going to try using it on my counters, too. I add them both to my laundry, as well.

I'm glad I have my journals, because my memory is foggy. I'm just staying open and listening to my heart. You're right, timing is everything. His boss has had both knees replaced, and the mother of his partner at work has had her hip replaced. He had offered to take me to the doctor, and to help me after the surgery. I was completely against the idea for quite a while. I was too terrified. Now that it's behind me, I am so relieved and recharged. I'm still feeling more improvement, especially in the past month.

I'm excited that I'm able to use the gym again. This new routine seems to be working well. It's a good balance, without causing any aggravation. I like the energy of the people there. It's a positive vibe.

I didn't really notice the age difference with him. When my hip problems started to accelerate, then I noticed it with everybody. I feel so much younger now, and I don't have any pain. It still flabbergasts me how the glitches in my back are gone, too. It was all connected to the pelvis and hip joints. I hope you are doing well, friend.

 

[Horseshoe]

Thanks for your replies on my pre op threads. I've read parts of your recovery thread, it's very positive and a comfort to read and like the tips about taking it slow and listening to your body during recovery. I used to be quite active and will def take it down a few notches and introduce hip friendly activities when the time is right, think it'll be fun to do new activities

 

[Hip Hip Hooray!]

Hi @Horseshoe, I'm so interested in hearing about your surgery. It sounds like you are doing one hip at a time for insurance reasons. I'll keep an eye out for how you're doing. I like what you said about the cost of cars. That's how I looked at it. I had $20,000. in savings, and actually went without a car and paid the surgeon cash. After that I inherited a really nice car. It's so worth it to get the best possible surgeon. I found the bilateral to be cost effective, too. I look forward to reading your thread.

 

[Hipster Girl]

@Hip Hip Hooray! it's amazing how the pre-surgery hip problems affected so many things, isn't it? I'm with you, I feel so much younger now. I didn't even realize how I always had a pained look on my face until I see old pictures of myself. I think it's great that you are staying open and listening to your heart. Who knows what might develop with your old boyfriend....I'm one of those believers who thinks if something is meant to be, it will be.

I'm happy that things are going well at the gym for you, especially happy that it's a positive vibe and you like the energy of the people there. That is so much a better environment than that grumpy ol' knitting group. It makes such a difference to be around positive people.

That's an interesting analogy about the $20K car & the hips. I never quite thought of it that way. These hips will last so much longer than even the most well cared for car, not to mention the new pain-free living which we can't even put a price tag on, so I would say your investment was well worth it.

@Horseshoe you are smart to tune into your body and take it easy introducing new activities. Slow and steady wins the race.

 

[Hip Hip Hooray!]

Hi @Hipster Girl, Yes, it sure does make a difference to be around positive people. I'd rather be with my dogs than with people who are antagonistic.

Today I was rereading my old journal from before the surgery. It brings back so many memories. It really makes me appreciate the whole journey. I'm way beyond what I expected. In three more months I will have my one year anniversary. Wow!

I was very slightly sore from the gym workout, so I iced a couple of times yesterday. Today I did the basic PT exercises again. I think they're good for toning the legs, too. It's so much easier to do all of my household tasks, compared to last year.

I called Blue Shield and Dr. Matta's office to find out how much the one year post op visit will cost. He's out of network, so I don't know which is the best way to pay. They might cover 50%. I don't understand how it works with the deductible. I left a message with his billing company. They're really good. Hopefully it won't be too expensive. It's worth it. Money well spent. I hope everyone else is doing well...

 

[Hipster Girl]

@Hip Hip Hooray! hard to believe it is coming up on a year already, wow! What a difference a year makes!

That's great that your household chores are so much easier. I am doing better with those, but still not there with others that require bending/stooping, like scrubbing down the shower stall, and even vacuuming with one of those big canister vacuums. I'm not pushing it - if I can't do something comfortably, then I don't force it.

I hope you hear back soon from the billing company. I wouldn't think the one-year post-op visit would be too expensive but I'm sure they will want to do x-rays. I wouldn't think it would be more than a couple hundred dollars but California rates may be higher.

Have you talked anymore to your former boyfriend since you saw him the other day at the gym?

Have a great day!

 

[Hip Hip Hooray!]

@Hipster Girl, I decided to email my ex last week. We were in touch a couple of times. I asked him for a referral for a mechanic. I needed some work done on my car yesterday and he's really good with cars. (I have had trouble with three different mechanics selling me things I didn't need.) He offered to stop by on his way home from work. I was thinking how dependable and reliable he is. My neighbor had been telling me how much she thought he loved me, and she pointed out how he was always here, and how he stayed with me when my hips were really bad.

So, he came over and talked to the mechanic for me on the phone. I was afraid it would be an expensive repair, and it turned out to only be $240. He was sweet as can be, and I fell for him all over again. We had a nice dinner, and he explained how all of the issues we had when we were a couple were now resolved. (certain financial issues that worried me.)

Anyway, he also told me he was on Facebook, so today I looked him up and read his page. It turns out he is in a relationship with a woman. I looked her up, and she had posted that she was in a relationship with him on April 30th. She had a heart on the post, and her friends were congratulating her.

I won't go into what happened last night, but it wouldn't have happened if I'd known he has a girlfriend. What a bummer. I guess I should be glad that I found out right away. Still, it's disappointing, especially at my age. He kept saying how he loved me, and complimenting me right and left...I feel really foolish.

 

[Hipster Girl]

Oh @hip hip hooray, I am so sorry. I know even though things were just starting to get rekindled, that really must have hurt a lot to find out

Please don't beat yourself up or feel foolish. It's not your fault. It's a good thing for technology so things like this come to the surface sooner. I'm so glad you found out sooner rather than later when you would have been even more emotionally invested. I'm so sorry, friend.

 

[Hipster Girl]

Hi @Hip Hip Hooray! just checking in to see how you're doing today. I know there is a cliche that says "it's not you, it's me" but just know that in your case, it really is not you, it's him. I know that doesn't make it sting any less but hopefully it helps to know you avoided getting any more emotionally vested in something that would only hurt even more further down the line.

Take care of yourself and keep dancing and riding your bike, and soap-making, and all the little things that you enjoy and bring you fulfillment. Maybe this opened your mind and heart to the prospect of another romantic relationship and you may not have even been aware that this is something you wanted, but now it may be something to consider. There are lots of other men out there, including some good ones, so maybe this thing with your ex-boyfriend accomplished one thing which is to open you up to the possibility of a love relationship with someone else.
Be extra kind to yourself and pamper yourself this weekend - you deserve it.

 

[Hip Hip Hooray!]

Hi @Hipster Girl, Thanks for your posts. I am glad that I found out so quickly. He had already offered to do some work on the roof and the pipes. He's really good at construction and plumbing, and that was such a help when he lived here. He probably would have started living a double life. That's not for me. Thank God I didn't marry him or have children with him. It could have been much more complicated.

You're right, there are a lot of other men out there. I went to the hardware store yesterday, and bought a pruning blade for my electric saw. My ex had given it to me, and it works really well for trimming the trees. It's light. There were a couple of men there who showed me how to remove the old blade and how to install the new one. It was really easy, and it only cost me $12.00 to buy two new blades. I had been procrastinating on that forever. I like doing those types of projects. They're easier than they look. I spent hours out in the yard yesterday, removing the dead wood from a fruitless mulberry tree in my front yard. I cut up all the branches and piled them by the curb. That'll make some nice firewood for somebody. Now I'm working on an old pine tree in the backyard. I'm removing the lower branches. It was the perfect therapy. It kept me busy, cleaned up the look of the landscape, and built my confidence. Tree trimming is very expensive when you pay a professional!

One good thing about the situation is that it made me see that my hips have really healed. My pelvis used to be locked backward, and my lower back was sway backed. Now my back is straight, and my pelvis in perfectly in alignment. I didn't realize how much that had affected my sex life. I had gotten used to the pain and lack of mobility. Now I feel like when I was in my twenties! Such a relief.

 

[Hipster Girl]

@Hip Hip Hooray! that is great that your lower back is straight and your pelvis is now in alignment. It is amazing how much our hip problems affected other parts of our bodies, that get corrected when we finally have THR.

I'm impressed with all the landscaping you are doing. That's a lot of work but I bet it looks great and the fact that it was therapeutic is an added bonus. And you're right, the cost of the blades is far cheaper than hiring a professional. I have hired a tree trimming service before and they don't come cheap. Much better to DIY if possible.

Sounds like you are doing well and in a good place, all things considered. You dodged a bullet with the ex-boyfriend for sure. Have you talked with him or do you plan to talk to him about what you found out?

 

[DeepBreath]

@Hip Hip Hooray! I'm glad you had that lovely dream about your mom. That sounds very comforting. Hang tough and keep doing the things you love. Nature is healing. *Hugs*

 

[Hip Hip Hooray!]

Hi @DeepBreath, Thanks. The dream was very special. It had so many symbols of her. Today I mopped the floors, did laundry, and went to the gym.

@Hipster Girl, I just confronted him by email. I let him have it, which is very out of character for me. It felt good, though. I'm curious to see how he responds. I've never really gotten mad at him before today. We had an amicable separation.

It felt good to tell him how I felt and to point out that neither his girlfriend or I deserve to be treated this way. I told him that he should be ashamed of himself, and that the least he could have done was to apologize and explain his lies and deceit.

I'm not sure what to think. It's brought up a lot of emotional pain, so I am going to take a bath. I am glad that I said something, though. When I was young, I just accepted this type of treatment. He drinks, and I think that's part of it. I am very wary of people who have drinking issues.

 

[DeepBreath]

@Hip Hip Hooray! I'm so sorry. I didn't see the post about your ex.
That was cruddy and dishonest that he didn't tell you that he's in a relationship.
Sending good thoughts out for you, friend.

 

[Hip Hip Hooray!]

@Hipster Girl, No I haven't talked to him. He hasn't responded to my emails. It was such a shock, because until we got back together, whenever he would see me, he looked distraught and like he was going to start crying. He had to come over a couple of times to work on the plumbing. I felt badly for him. It still seems so weird to me. I just let it all go and did a ton of tree trimming today. I cleared off the top of my chicken coop. It was covered with pine needles, pine cones, and dirt. I stood up there and sawed off several branches from my huge pine tree. It looks SO much better. It was very rewarding. I spread out the pine needles like mulch in the backyard. That should help suffocate the weeds. It's good for the soil, too. It feels like a forest floor.

@DeepBreath, I agree. It was such a shock. We had such a good time together, and I was so excited about how well things were going. He had been so helpful, and I thought the whole thing was an answer to my prayers. It's weird, because when we were together, he was very dependable and reliable. Oh well. I can't control it, so I've just thrown myself into my yardwork.

I used your words in an email to him. He's not used to this side of me. We never really fought. I feel a lot better today. I bought some comfort food at the store. I made tuna and noodles, and had some vanilla and caramel gelato for dessert. I'm going to henna my hair tonight.