TKR Two years out from October 2023 TKR

[Dmcfad2]

@Jockette @Layla Thank you for your support. l am having a difficult time. I respect my surgeon so much. He is tops in his field and I believe he knows what he is talking about. Still, it is at odds with everything I learn here on BoneSmart. Frankly, the BoneSmart way makes more sense to me. It’s just difficult to go against his advice for me and I can’t help but think that if I work harder, I will see results. The whole thing is literally making me feel sick. And now, because of what my surgeon said, I’ve got my husband telling me to work harder, take the pain and try to make it even more painful so you get better ROM. I snapped at him and told him I would do what I want and to leave me alone. Shoot, he’s not the one dealing with this, I am.
Anyway, I will continue doing my PT exercises for the next couple of weeks and see where I am at that point. I will push just a little harder to get more flexion and do the exercises more often, but I‘m not going to kill myself. I’m hoping my ROM improves over those two weeks and I won’t have to deal with an MUA at all.

 

[JusticeRider]

@Dmcfad2 , it makes me so angry that your surgeon did this to you. You were coming along well and though the mental aspect is hard, you were coming through it. And then he berated you and frightened you and discouraged you, and made you feel like a failure! I am so sorry.

It has only been FOUR WEEKS. That is a blink of an eye in the scheme of things. Most surgeons are satisfied with 90 degrees at 6 weeks. I don’t understand why he is giving you such a hard time. Under no circumstances should he be making you cry and feel physically ill.

I just want you to know that I wasn’t anywhere near 90 degrees at 4 weeks, and here I am hiking and backpacking and riding my horse and running my farm. I hiked over 10 miles recently over a trail rated as ‘difficult’. That ‘window of opportunity’ stuff is BS. Can I say BS here? Moderators please feel free to censor me. You don’t deserve to feel like you’re failing, @Dmcfad2 , you are doing great!

Surgeons are experts at the mechanics of those artificial joints they put in us, but they are not experts at knowing OUR bodies. Is there any other situation where hurting ourselves until we cry is good for us? I refused to do it and I have no regrets.

Just remember that your surgeon works for you, not the other way around. You know your body better than anyone. I want to reach out and give you a big virtual hug. You deserve better. I’m pulling for you

 

[Layla]

Can I say BS here?

We all know it stands for BoneSmart.

It is sad and unfortunate that this visit has upset you to the point of feeling sick. Sleep on this and see how you feel in the morning. Don't lose sight of the fact that this is your recovery to do however you choose. You are not even one month post op. Set realistic expectations for yourself.

 

[Woodbutcher]

Do not be bullied into hurting yourself. We all progress at a different pace. Work until you feel pain and then stop. When you feel better do it again. You will get there and your knee will reward you.

 

[sistersinhim]

He is tops in his field and I believe he knows what he is talking about.

I'm sorry but I disagree with this statement. There is no window of opportunity to achieve ROM. Your doctor was cruel and it angers me. This was so unnecessary to treat you this way.

Do not be bullied into hurting yourself.

Hurting your baby knee will only cause more swelling and less ROM. We see it here all the time. It's cause and effect.

Frankly, the BoneSmart way makes more sense to me.

We have had years of experience from tens of thousands of members. Your surgeon sees you two or three times after your TKR. We see many people every single day.

I’ve got my husband telling me to work harder, take the pain and try to make it even more painful so you get better ROM. I snapped at him and told him I would do what I want and to leave me alone. Shoot, he’s not the one dealing with this, I am.

Good for you telling him to back off. Why don't the two of you go to YouTube and watch a live TKR? You will understand why it takes months and even a year or more to heal from it, and why overworking the knee will only make it worse not better in the immediate future. You don't have to do that. It is not necessary!

There is no reason at all for you to have to go to pain to recover successfully. You can not heal a joint replacement in only 1 month. Would you exercise a broken leg until it completely healed? Well, your knee has two major bones that were cut off, and drilled into, and foreign materials were pounded into it. Just watch the video. You will be amazed that you are doing as well as you are.

 

[CatieViv]

I think you are doing amazing. Don't let that surgeon do anything with your knee. You still have a lot of healing to go. I read @JusticeRider recovery tread. If she can overcome this major surgery and all the frustration and tears, then so can you and I. I'm sure I'm probably not where my surgeon wants me to be either. I will see him at 8 weeks (6 week was postponed.)

Keep going the Bonesmart way. You will be amazed at the changes you will see even in 2 weeks. And come back here and vent whenever you need to. There are good people here. Big hugs to you

 

[Dmcfad2]

Everybody on this site is so nice. I admit I feel defeated right now and don’t really have anything to say. I feel like my surgeon was upset with me because I wasn’t doing better. I’ve always thought he was so nice, but I saw a different side of him today. He was kind of abrupt. I have been on the verge of tears all day. I’m looking forward to a better tomorrow.

 

[mendogal]

Sending a ((hug))... surgeons are highly skilled technicians who do their best work when we are asleep, and sometimes we can't ask or expect much more of them; ultimately their opinion of us is neither here nor there.

 

[sistersinhim]

@Dmcfad2, I pray for your peace of mind and healing mentally, emotionally and physically.

 

[JusticeRider]

My husband says he thinks these surgeons treat everyone as if they are the laziest couch potato who will sit around doing nothing, never moving their leg and getting stiff. Sure, there are probably people out there like that, but that isn’t most of us and our dr’s shouldn’t treat us as if we are. Most of us just really want to heal, get our ROM and function back, and get on with our rich and fulfilling lives.
Husband also said, as a manager of a team, that fear and shaming is a terrible way to motivate someone anyway. I agree!
Hang in there, @Dmcfad2 , as you can see, you’ve got a whole community here who understand. Get some good sleep and tomorrow will be brighter

 

[Loulou67]

Well it’s my 4 week anniversary today….. and I know I’m not at 90 degrees yet, but I also know that I’m doing my best and I believe I’m improving, slowly, every day.
I’m not back at physio till a week on Tuesday and I’m hoping that I’ll have improved by then.
I’m so sorry your surgeon has made you feel so rubbish, I’m dreading my next consultation with mine, but it’s not for a couple of weeks yet, I just hope he doesn’t treat me that way, because I will cry!!
The ROM seems to be taking over our days , and yesterday I stopped doing the heel slides, that really hurt me to do and I started sitting on the arm of my sofa letting gravity pull my leg down and then just did gentle leg swings back and forth and you know what…. It really helped me…. And then I’ve been sitting with my leg bent as far as I can get it and gently rocking it back and forth while holding onto my my knee or thigh and that seems to be helping me too…..
I think we both need to keep reading other folks journeys on here and realise that we’re probably doing way better than we think we are . I’m sending you a virtual hug right now x

 

[Dmcfad2]

sistersinhim Layla JusticeRider Woodbutcher CatieViv mendogal Loulou67
Wow. I can’t express how much your support and words mean to me. It is overwhelming and I am so grateful to have found my friends here on this forum who have been through this and understand. I can feel the love and support and it makes a huge impact. Thank you all from the bottom of my heart.
I had a good sleep last night. I said a heartfelt prayer to God and just asked for Him to help me with this whole thing. I have a greater sense of peace this morning. Interestingly enough, I feel I turned a corner this morning. When I got out of bed and walked to the kitchen, I noticed my knee is less stiff. The tight band feeling is better. I can bend further. My heel/toe walking is easier. Coincidence? I think not. I don’t know what others here believe, but I know my prayer was heard. Maybe 4 weeks was the magic number for me. I’m not saying I’m 100%, but I am definitely getting a better bend this morning with much less pain. I also worked really hard yesterday doing heel slides and other flexion exercises. I pushed harder than I have before, so maybe that helped, too.
I also reached out to my physio and told her what happened. She sent me the nicest email saying that she thought I was good where I was at and that she and her supervisor thought talking about an MUA already was premature. She knows how hard I worked in PT. It was good confirmation for me, as well as all of the support from everyone here.
Anyway, I feel more optimistic today. I am in charge of my body and I do know it better than anyone. It is ultimately up to me to do what I think is best. Happy Friday to everyone. I love this forum so much!!

 

[Layla]

What great news! I am happy to read you're feeling more optimistic after prayer and a good nights rest.
I am a believer, so I agree that it's not coincidental. However, as your body continues to heal, you will likely have some ups and downs, but you were in desperate need of a major dose of grace after what you were forced to deal with yesterday and I'd say you received it.

I'm happy you have a fresh outlook this morning. Your OS is the expert surgeon, but those you've met here are a testament to how recovery can go through their personal experience, so don't lose sight of that. I'm glad your PT also agreed that MUA talk is premature so I hope you can toss that notion out of your mind, take one day at a time, not losing sight of what was done to your leg and that it's still early days for you. You will get where you want to be, just not today, or even next week, it's a s-l-o-w process, so sit back and try to enjoy the ride to the best of your ability. You know your limitations.

Happy weekend, Debbie! I hope it's a good one for you.
@Dmcfad2

 

[CatieViv]

Prayer is amazing! I have so many friends praying me through this recovery. Don't know what I would do without Him. So glad to hear you slept well last night and are in better spirits today.

 

[sistersinhim]

I am also a believer, and a strong believer in the power of prayer! You have many here praying for your successful recovery, but also for your patience. Putting God in control of your recovery will, I believe, bring you peace of mind and a realistic recovery goal. It is so uplifting to read of your new attitude. We will be here through your ups and downs. If you need to vent, then vent. If you want to celebrate, we will cheer right along with you!

 

[Dmcfad2]

I am also a believer, and a strong believer in the power of prayer! You have many here praying for your successful recovery, but also for your patience. Putting God in control of your recovery will, I believe, bring you peace of mind and a realistic recovery goal. It is so uplifting to read of your new attitude. We will be here through your ups and downs. If you need to vent, then vent. If you want to celebrate, we will cheer right along with you!

Thank you. I appreciate the prayers. I usually come to terms with whatever might be happening, but sometimes I need that one day to cry and rant and feel sorry for myself. I'm much better today.

 

[Dmcfad2]

I’m awake at 4 am and I had trouble falling asleep last night, so I‘ve only had about 4 hours sleep. Hopefully, I can nap today.
My knee was aching more than usual last night and I’m sure it’s because I‘ve ramped up my exercises. I’m not hurting myself, but I am definitely pushing myself a little harder on the flexion exercises, pushing my knee to a very uncomfortable position and holding it there a little longer. I’m icing and elevating after every PT session I’m doing at home. I spent about 30 minutes at a time yesterday doing my home exercises and I did them 4 times. I‘ve done them every day since surgery, but I’m being more disciplined now.
Little accomplishments: I drove yesterday and I didn’t need to move the seat all the way back to get my leg in to the car and then move it back up to my driving position once I sat in the drivers seat, which means I could bend my knee enough to get in. It hurt a little, but I did it.
I stood up from a seated position on my couch without using my arms to assist me.
I still need my cane to walk properly.

 

[CatieViv]

Little accomplishments are so uplifting! I have noticed getting out of the car is getting easier too. Good for you for getting up off the couch with no hands! I've been able to do that once from my bed.

Sounds like you are going a little hard on your exercises. That aching tells me I've done too much. Stay out of the ODIC! Happy napping

 

[Layla]

Little accomplishments: I drove yesterday and I didn’t need to move the seat all the way back to get my leg in to the car and then move it back up to my driving position once I sat in the drivers seat, which means I could bend my knee enough to get in. It hurt a little, but I did it.
I stood up from a seated position on my couch without using my arms to assist me.

See…progress! You may think it's slow, but it is progress nonetheless.

 

[Dmcfad2]

deleted