Become an Insider

THR SurreyGirls's 2nd THR Journey

It is Tuesday, the 5th day at the HFzhbsnd I am in a benign mood.
Breakfast arrives at 8:30 and I look at it in appreciation. Poached egg on toast and perfect with the glistening yolk pleasing “eat me” I pick up the spoon. And there is a knock on the door. It is Nurse x there to give me my daily blood thinner injection. Talk about timing…

“Ouch”! I yell as the Nurse , trying to be as gentle as possible expresses surprise. Of course! I haven’t had any morphine for quite a while.oh well, at least it shows the morphine is leaving my system.

The once perfect egg congeals in its imperfection. I eat it anyway and wait for the Carer. And wait…
 
And wait… this is not good. I am aware that time is gettting on and I need to get washed. The delightful Senior Carer G (fair of face) has assured me someone is coming…

09.06. Ok, physio not until 10:30 but I take a lot of time and have to compose myself mentally before physio in order to be able to concentrate and learn in the sessions.

Still No sign of carer. Amuse myself by accidentally dropping my phone on the floor. Impossible to pick up!

Try to get it vertical with shoehorn and succeed but grabber not coping. I have an “idea”.

I put the cloth thst covers the icepack on the floor. I flip the phone onto it. The grabber will now slide under the phone and I grab the phone sides. A perfect manoeuvre. Phone now “told off “ and placed securely on the table
 
09:26. Breakfast was nearly an hour ago. And the carer arrives. She is a delightful petite lady. I tower over her in the shower.

Unfortunately, and not for the first time with the Carers , she seems unaware that I need to have a special extra dressing over the wound which should have temporary tape too. I am used to putting an extra large towel around the affected area. The Carer gives me quite a lot of “feedback” as to why she is right and I am wrong. After all she has 20 years of experience behind her ! she finds the extra plastic but no tape and we get going…I am VERY nervous so probably don’t help much.


Sadly, at one point, the shower head gets the wound wet. I quickly dry it with the big towel. Hopefully the telltale blue gauze by which the Grumpy Consultant can tell if it got wet is intact. It is. Phew!

However, I am now really really fed up. I am exhausted by having to tell different people each day about the “special” wound dressing and it’s special care.

90% of guests here would not have this issue but the GC is a stickler for the wound-that-must- not- get wet. He is paranoid re potential infection and so am I.

I should mention at this point that my lovely sister, Christine, died of sepsis that could have been prevented and I am paranoid.
Deep down I have a morbid fear that is breaking through the morphine haze.

I end up having a strip wash and ask the Carer if we can wash my hair in the salon later. She agrees and goes off to make sure we have permission to use it in the absence of the hairdresser. Bless her. She wants to get it right and I am being a Diva!
 
Time is getting on.
I sit down (clean but with disgusting hair) and think. Do I want the physio? It is imminent. The Physio of the Day will be coming up soon.

Am I in a fit state to concentrate on it?
No.
So “What If” I cancelled?

Decision made I call reception. “May I see a Manager asap?”
(Note I did not say “NOW”!)

I also cancel the physio. Somewhat to their surprise.

I get my phone and start scrolling through my notes. The brain is clearing but I am still rather muddled but my one thing is clear. I have been here 5 days and the experience is not what I had hoped for..

The Customer Care/Manager arrives..
 
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J is a lovely woman and I knew her from my previous stay here. She was also the one who greeted me on arrival this time after my early departure from the Royal Surrey.

The meeting takes an hour. I show her the physio card which looks like a Bingo Card on Acid.. She is horrified at the number of changes.

We discuss events slowly and carefully. I sip my water as my mouth is dry and confess I am buying myself time in order to gather my thoughts . It is hard going through dates and times in my current state particularly as J wants to backtrack, make notes, go forward, backtrack again…. She is being thorough but my head is spinning and I am aware I am stammering. Not usual for me and a sign of stress. I feel I am trying to think through a tight band around my head.

. I make a point of praising Carers and Nurses as and when . The problem is not with them.

Eventually we get it all down.

J has listened and the following is agreed..

Breakfast will be by 8:30am thereby allowing me to take the morphine in time for the Physio.

all physio times switched to 10:30 (where they were in the first place)

I will be assigned a Senior Carer each day and clear instructions as to how the wound is to treated will be communicated.

During this meeting the Carer knocks on the door 3 times… “we have the salon! I need to do Mrs S’s hair!

Even though J and I are trying to have a serious discussion we can’t help smiling. The very conscientious Carer is only trying to do her job. I feel sorry for her having to deal with Moi!

I really also like J despite the circumstances..

I am promised that the next 5 days will turn around my current experience and J and I depart amicably. And now to Hair. Finally!
 
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The Importance of Hair

We are in the salon and we are happy. My hair is being washed with great care and, with permission, I take a video. The Conscientious Carer (TCC) is determined I should have a gold star experience. Senior Carer G also arrives.

The atmosphere is amicable. I also using my own shampoo so the salon smells of coconut and newly-washed Surrey Girl. My husband is coming for lunch. Seabsss and new potatoes on the menu.

TCC starts to dry my hair and style it..Wait! I was going to do that myself. But I haven’t the heart to tell her I am worried about the time. And she really is excellent…

My new hip is grumbling a bit but probably glad of the break from physio. I am nieces looking Great and a complete contrast to Yesterday.. ! TCC has done a too class job.. and so to lunch….
 
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My husband is there and we meet for pre lunch drinks. I introduce him to new friend Jean, a lovely lady who tells him how much pain I have been in the physio.

The Senior Manager (SM) comes in briefed by J and asks me if I have time for a meeting. But I am already exhausted by this morning events , have my husband for lunch and am greatly looking forward to a from my sister.. so politely decline.

However I suggest that we run over the points discussed and SM agrees. So I explain about the issues the changes in physio times is causing abd the fact that each lunchtime I am pain due to not being able to ice in time after the physio and thst I hate to be the one going “ouch! at lunch, putting off and concerning the other guests who are helpfully suggesting the warm hydro pool as a solution.. however for the wound-that-must-not-get-wet this is not an option for me.,

Jean is listening intently as well as Hubby and I suspect half the people in the lounge! I did notice a perceived difference in attitude to me afterwards by the guests who no longer mentioned the much-desired therapy pool..

Hubby and I have a nice lunch and the food us delicious. Harry the Hip is turning out to be teetotal btw or very nearly and his new owner js following suit.

Pain levels a mere 1-2. Good

Hubby leaves and my sister arrives..,
 
She is looking stunning having just come from a meeting in London. In face I have rarely seen her so glamorous. I get to my feet and, most unuSually for me give her a huge and genuine hug. This takes us both by surprise. We have a lovely chat and I take her around the HFH and I can tell that outwardly she is impressed. We go up to the beautiful room terrace. The uk weather is cooperating so we sit outside for a bit. .having thought I had said goodbye to her I was delighted to see Jean, wrapped up in her woollens like everyone’s favourite Granny. She decides, unprompted to describe in graphic detail how the HFH eventually got her to move her bowels. Normally the HFH do not allow Admission until there had been a Emission, confirmed by the hospital that did the operation.

, Jean’s gentle and placid face belies the horrors of what she went through. My sister and I feel sick. But I am grateful for all the prunes, figs, apples and Laxido I had out through my system from the minute I was admitted. Jean then, having heard at lunchtime my conversation with the SM re my woes, describes what i had been through. My Sister is now angry. And has gone Quiet. Oh dear!

I say very fond goodbyes to Jean and hope we will stay in touch..

My sister says she wants a private chat. Now! Feeling a little like a naughty child i go to my room and she follows me.
 
We have a very long-ranging chat from the death of my other sister, her twin, who died of sepsis suddenly, to my long marriage and it’s pros and cons.

my hip is stating to hurt and my brain, which has been under pressure all day, is starting to stammer it’s words and gets confused. After all it has been a VERY busy day and recounting the events to my Sister is causing me more pressure.

My boss has previously offered me a sabbatical or the chance to work from home but in a place of my choosing for a few months. My sister immediately offers me a downstairs room in her house complete with private bathroom and access to a private workspace. I think about it. It is very kind of her and I can tell she means it. Somehow I need to take her up on her kind offer, if only for a week or two.. I am overwhelmed.

K the Senior Carer has been hovering all afternoon. She comes up to do something in the room. I ask to see my patient notes and ask her to find the page (screenshotted) of the picture of the outlined person showing where the wound is and which side of the body and placement. The paperwork has the name of the consultant too..

The special
blue gauze is mentioned but NOTHING about how it needs a special dressing. K agrees . She takes off the book but not before I scan the page and the pages showing the HFH’s notes from the day of admission. . K is lovely but sadly off for a few days.. we give each other a huge hug.

My Sister also goes to leave and wants to hug me. A first she is unsure, given my state, of whether to do so or how I will react to it. . I finally mention that she has lost weight and she is delighted I have noticed..,. She did it over 2 years by cutting bread and wine. We say a fond goodbye.

I stand up unaided and give her a big hug..

I feel more warmth towards her than I have in years and hope she feels the same..
 
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I am very tired. Some rather nice guests have invited me to “Supper Club”… as most guests are doing 2 x physio sessions a day many have supper in their rooms but the real survivors meet downstairs I’m in one big table for supper. Last time around I adored supper club and made some great friends. Unlike the lunchtimes where the conversations start with @when did you arrive”, hip or knee, who is your consultant etc and even whether you were operated in privately or Via the NHS!

Supper Club is different abd topics of conversation vary widely. With our busy lives it is rare to have the opportunity for these conversations and I treasure them.
However I am shattered after 2 visits and one intense meeting with management so no Supper Club for me tonight.

Supper arrives… I still have a sore throat from the op so have ordered ice cream. I finish my quiche and salad and greedily approach the small covered pudding bowl… but….. it is warm!
 
“Funny sort of icecream@ I think. And yes it is. Vegetable soup for pudding anyone?
 
I ignore the soup and miss the icecream and prepare for bed. I am an expert in strip washes by now.

Unfortunately earlier after a very intense day I had had a rather unpleasant incident involving the ice machine, bad pain , freezing cold and shivering and a very unsympathetic person and shock earlier - so was still feeling flaky. My hip is doing well but my mind is another matter.. I am still confused by those events even now… very unfortunate.

The wonderful Staff Nurse B comes to tuck me up complete with an extra blanket. She is caring, very considerate and kind even when she has to do the stomach injections she tries so hard to be gentle. She is a shining example of her profession.. I wish I could take her home!

I feel much comforted and drift into sleep. Nice and warm and cosy. A night without morphine hopefully but it is within reach.
 
At 3am approx I wake up. My bladder refuses to calm down so I have a pee and walk around the room with the zimmer. Hip doing well and my mind feels calm… I walk around for a bit and then get back into bed. I ring the bell. I want ice, tea and biscuits.

This is one of the reasons I am at the HFH, one can do this anytime day or night..
 
A “Domestic”!!

The talk male Carer arrives. I have nicknamed him Lofty. He is a fascinating person. Earlier in the week I had politely refused an assisted shower with him as although he has great presence I felt uncomfortable showering with a male stranger . He understands and explained st the time the HFH was a little short staffed.,

And so Lofty answer my bell.

He is a very interesting guy and quite the intellectual. He also studied at the same place where I work and knows some people I know. We have a wide ranging discussion and disagree strongly on sone subjects. He states that sone of his views are personal and not those of the management here… at one point he realises he has gone too far in disagreeing with one of my points of view. I say I respect his views and am enjoying the argument and to please continue. I strongly suspect he is enjoying this too. Another bell rings so He says he will be back after he has attended to the other patient and then come back with my tea and icepacks. As this is my second night off morphine my brain is now waking up and I have been enjoying myself.. I wait his return with anticipation..
 
And so he returns but the mood has changed. Something is wrong.

Turns out the patient next door had rang the bell. She heard the increasingly heated conversation and thought a “domestic” might be happening .

L and I are mortified. It certainly was not our intention to disturb anyone. As I have not yet met my next door neighbour I am determined to find her the next day and apologise.. more of this later.

L serves me my tea and is then called away by Nurse A… sadly I think we are both in trouble and I blame myself totally . It was me encouraging L that sparked off our heated discussion. It is not his fault.

I’m feeling bad about all this.

.
 
Oh my SurreyGirl
We can't take you anywhere:heehee:
Having a verbal spar with the staff at the hippy hotel within earshot of your anxious recouping neighbor ...
I'm sure when you see her - apologize and explain - all will be fine.:) :-) (:

You seem to be doing well, and I hope things continue to improve...
Happy Friday.

(Look out, weekend staff!... They will have been warned:snork:)
 
I'm laughing at this "exciting" conversation you two were enjoying...until...
I have my own thoughts and opinions but I'm not one to spar with another who has opposing view points. We were all born with and free will and able to think for ourselves, and I say you do you and I'll do me, we don't have to agree.
I have a friend that really wants to change my viewpoint to his viewpoint on some political issues, so now I tell him I love spending time with you but those issues are off the table. Respectfully agree to disagree.
I understand about you not wanting to shower with male nurse, my Dad was always embarrassed when female nurse assisted him in shower. It's nice now that there are more male nurses to help with male patients. For me, I've given birth twice so could care less who assists me when showering! LOL!
Try to behave yourself next couple of days! LOL! :heehee:
 
This is all being written slightly in hindsight but the timelines will merge soon. Writing this at home in the garden based on my recent notes.
 
The next day dawns. Before going to bed the night before the Senior Manager (SM) had been to check the physio had put extra stretchy stuff over the wound. I explained that noone had been to see me and my sister had been with me all afternoon. I rolled over slightly to show her…

Morning dawned and suddenly I was being treated like a Primary on the Below deck yachting series.

My breakfast arrives promptly after 8-15

Matron C a really delightful lady comes up whisktvi am having breakfast and the extra stretchy covering is applied and taped. One more plastic temporary layer for the forthcoming shower and my thigh looks like a boil in the bag chicken! She also queries me about the last five days and expresses regret that the “ wound that must not get wet” had had varying degrees of attention! My notes are updated with that day’s date to show that, finally, the extra stuff had been added.

One of the Senior Carers arrive and the plastic apron and tape is added. I have a lovely shower and a chat. Senior Carer, lCharming and Slim” - her words is delightful. She has been at the hotel for hippies a long while and remembers me from 5 years ago. It is fun! I have 30 mins before my physio so have time to dry my hair (hurrah!) and do a bit of light makeup and get ready. I also have time to take sone morphine in plenty of time to manage the physio.
 
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