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snowleopard said:
My health insurance is free for me through my place of employment, and costs a little under 2K a year for my husband, and an additional 2K a year for our children. Both of my children went off the insurance this year, and since my divorce is supposed to finalize (after an eight year separation) next month, my husband will go off of the insurance as well. (I keep reminding him to get routine medical tests taken care of, as our whole family's deductible and out-of-pocket is covered for the next three weeks. Nope. But then, he didn't listen to me before, so no surprise there.)
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Amazing, but yeah, if he didn't listen before, there's little chance of him doing so now, even when it would benefit him so greatly.

As a member of the US military, my health care was entirely free for my entire 28 years of service, and I pay a whopping $270 a year plus some co-pays now that I'm retired (it's a very good deal). I am concerned Congress wants to raise that amount quite a bit, but I realize to people paying nearly $1000 a month for health insurance, that's not going to earn us military folk any sympathy. For decades, we were promised free health care for life, though, and that's why veteran's organizations fight so hard to retain those military benefits for our people who have volunteered their lives to defend the country.

snowleopard said:
I remain utterly grateful to live in a time and place where this level of care is available. In a hundred years, this will no doubt seem primitive, but for here-and-now, we are among the fortunate minority. l had a friend who had to wait eight years for a new knee, because she'd worked at jobs that didn't pay insurance, and when her knee went south she couldn't work anymore. Someone gave her a scooter, and for the last four years, she used that to get around. When she turned 65 and qualified for medicare, suddenly the world was at her feet offering her services: surgery, home health care, physical therapy. And if she'd gotten this surgery when she first needed it, she'd have been a productive member of the work force, not to mention a lot happier, for another decade. Her recovery was a lot slower because she had deteriorated so much over time. I'm good with having some kind of safety net for people like my friend, but I don't pretend to think there's simple solutions.
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This is our challenge. How to provide needed services for people at all levels of employment. I know there were dreams the Affordable Care Act would do this, but I don't see it happening. Nobody can afford any plans that offer any real care. (If someone here is willing to admit they have benefited from this, I'll qualify my statement.) What I see from our non-US members who reside in countries with a National Health Service, it appears for many to avoid long waits, they must purchase supplemental insurance at a pretty hefty cost to achieve this. There are no easy answers on this.

snowleopard said:
I also heard about medical supplies being provided via drones, and even speculation of high-risk babies who are born in off-road communities being delivered to critical care facilities via these modern-day storks. Poetic as the image is on a certain level, I find that idea terrifying.
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I could deal with drones providing medical supplies. Pick up and delivery for critical care services? That would take more than a casual, run-of-the-mill drone. That's a pretty sophisticated drone on the level of Global Hawk. Not a trivial solution.
 
NHS and private are completely separate.

All UK residents are entitled to use the NHS for all of their healthcare requirements. It is free of charge at the point of use apart from dental which has a reasonably small charge. Everything else is free - GP visits, emergency care, surgery, cancer treatment and treatment for anything else you need. It is funded by our taxes. The system can get overburdened resulting in long waiting lists. Generally, care is of a very good standard.

Only a relatively small number of people have private medical insurance. Some choose to pay the premiums themselves. Others, like me, get it from their employer as a benefit. The level of cover varies hugely depending on the type of policy purchased. The main benefit is the ability to choose whichever specialist you want to see, get a prompt appointment for a consultation and have the surgery or treatment in a private hospital with little or no wait. However, most insurance companies insist on you being referred to the specialist by your NHS GP, so there the two systems do meet.

My OS works at one of the best NHS hospitals in the country for orthopaedics. Most NHS consultants and specialists carry out private work in addition to their NHS work. Makes them a lot of extra £££. I researched my OS's specialisms, found out where he does his private work, asked my NHS GP to write a referral letter to his private practice then called my insurance company to get authorisation to see him and then have the surgery in a private hospital. Without the insurance I could have asked my GP to refer me to him at the NHS hospital but the wait would probably have been long, at least a few months, perhaps even longer. By the time any additional x-rays etc had been carried out and the NHS agreed that I could have the surgery it would probably be scheduled for much later this year or even into next year, rather than me being 6 weeks on the other side today.
 
Fascinating. So many layers. But it seems to make some sense.


Jean

LTKR (Stryker Triathlon): 21 April 2015
Right Knee Arthroscopy: 25 July 2006
Left Knee Arthroscopy: 10 February 2005
 
Of course many of us have wait times to see the OS, particularly for initial appointments, and for other specialists even with insurance in the US. So much depends on where you live and what your insurance plan is.

:xmark: But we should probably get back to your recovery before we get completely derailed.
 
Thank you, @kneeper.

I do have a recovery question. The dreaded `tight band' is still under my knee. I am comparing myself to our prodigies whose bands are gone (and you know who you are!) When I try to stretch mine out by moving the lower leg directly back, the band feels as if it's pushing the knee-cap askew towards the inside. Very disconcerting and a bit painful if I go too far.

Did anyone else experience that? Did it go away with stretching? Or time? bleh. Feels as if everything else is ready to be healed and done with it, and this one aspect of my knee is holding up progress.
 
Mine seemed to get better once I stopped wearing the dreaded stockings. And as I increased my walking. I didn't do anything, it just sort of went away. Sorry, not so helpful!
 
The tight band can linger for quite a long time. Try not to worry about it and please don't compare your recovery to anyone else's.
Don't try to do anything about it. It's only 2+ months since your surgery, so you have plenty of time.
 
With my first knee the tight band took 7 months before I realised it had gone completely. The left knee done 3 months ago hasn't had the tight band feeling but does get stiff if I do one thing for too long. My physio said its like the leg is splinted and its a response to stop us doing something that will hurt it.
 
@snowleopard - Just now catching up on your thread.. Have been thinking about you.. Not sure how I got so behind! So glad to hear your surgery went well.. How was the flight and logistics surrounding that? You're a busy gal! Hopefully you can breathe a bit after the next couple of weeks!! :yes:
 
@snowleopard - I didn't mean to disappear after asking that question, but thank you for taking the time to respond so eloquently. And @Jamie - thank you so much for your comment! It can be a touchy subject and one that I'm sensitive to and about. Growing up my sister was called all of the names you mentioned and probably a few you didn't. Spaz was probably one of the most offensive since her type of CP is spastic paralysis. I remember one year traveling through Florida, going from Miami to Pensacola, we spent the night in some very small town. In the morning we stopped at a diner for breakfast. This was a few years before the Civil Rights movement so there were separate dining areas. There we were - "Northerners" with a "crippled" kid. Want to guess which section we were seated in? And yes, even in recent years we've been in stores or restaurants where the clerk/waiter only addresses me and ignores her. We've come up with a few ways of dealing with that and while it's never my intent to humiliate someone, occasionally it does help make the point.

No doubt growing up with someone like my sister colors how I view the disability issue. Through all of my recent surgeries (shoulder reconstruction, spinal fusion and 2 TKRs), I've viewed myself as recovering or rehabbing but never disabled even though there might have been things I couldn't do at that particular time. Interestingly, my sister and I had a conversation about this issue and she said that she realized she had challenges that most people didn't but that she never thought of herself as being disabled.

Dealing with people who offer or insist on helping you can be tricky. Obviously, if the person is being condescending in the way they address you or how they offer, an angry response is completely reasonable and understandable. For the others, there are 2 things that I try to keep in mind. First, I have absolute knowledge that I am totally capable of handling my own groceries (or shoveling snow, etc.) so accepting help takes nothing away from my independence. And second, I truly believe that sometimes another person's need to feel they are helping is more important than my need to show them how independent I actually am. Maybe they're trying to pay it forward for the time when they need help and maybe, when that time comes, I'll be around to pay it back.
 
I am a little concerned. I go back to work hot-and-heavy for our most intense season of the year, ten weeks w/no breaks to speak of, starting Monday. I just came downstairs to do some food prepping and am resting on the couch after making a batch of over-fried almond-crusted chicken fingers (not exactly a major prep). I am trying to spend the rest of this weekend getting ready for next week, with food prepped and clean laundry and any shopping wrapped up. But I am feeling drained.

A recap of the last week-and-a-half: flew out of town for eye surgery on the 5th, procedure completed on the 6th, flew home on the 7th (Friday). Monday, long-overdue mammogram; Tuesday, results of bone-density scan; Wed, fasted and prepped for colonoscopy, Thursday had that procedure, Friday teeth were cleaned (mega-doses of antibiotics for both). Trying to head off the reaction I had to the antibiotics last time with major doses of probiotics and yogurt. And still trying to get my winter's wood supply (not to mention next winter's!) squared away, and preparing to face divorce court early next month.

Small lump ("nodule, probably benign") found in one of my breasts, so that will need ultrasound, possible needle aspiration; who knows? Hopefully that will be attended to quickly so that my insurance year doesn't run out and restart on me. Also have follow-up scheduled w/general practitioner for advice on the osteopenia and then re-visiting my knee surgeon at the end of the month. Then, I hope, things will slow down and I can just concentrate on daily living.

My STBX wants to come out this weekend and try to talk me out of the divorce, as he did last weekend, and the weekend before, and the weekend before that. Since he really didn't show much interest in reconciling until he realized that this was going to be an expensive procedure, and since he's not said anything new, and since I end up emotionally drained, I'm thinking about taking a pass this time. I have that edge-of-trembly-tired feeling, and want to just stay relaxed for awhile, rest, and face the upcoming week feeling rested and ready.

@Braunzie, the eye is healing up, but it takes a few weeks for the muscle to heal, and then another week for the sutures to dissolve, and a few more months for the eyes to relearn to work together. So there's still energy being diverted for that. But overall, the operation appears to have been a complete success and I look forward to living with the improvement, much like the leg.

@susie09, thank you for your eloquent reply. Let me think over what you said and get back with you.

One of those no-way-out-but-through times of life. Now, must go check on that chicken!
 
@snowleopard - wow.. you are doing so much. No wonder you feel so drained. Sounds like you're going to spend your weekend working, while heading into a really busy week in itself. You need to downtime, my friend!! You need to make some time for you to rest and regroup. I get there is a lot to do.. (Not to mention the energy expending on the extra healing and wondering about what the ultrasound will find. ) Do you have any friends that might be able to come over and help you? I say pass on the visit from the STBX... sounds like he's had plenty of chances.

Hope you find the time to rest.. May the Force be with you!!! :yes:
 
Absolutely take a pass on the STBX visit. You are smart to get clothes and all ready before the work week begins. I come home from work and go straight to bed for an hour or so, then have something simple to eat, lay out my clothes, breakfast, and lunch for the next day, and go back to bed. And my job is not strenuous. Did more today than I should have - worked a bit in the yard, introduced a new caregiver to a client, drove (for the first time! Yay!) across town to my favorite fruit and veggie store, went to Sam's Club, and came home and cooked dinner. This is not a heavy schedule. But I am toast. So my point is, save your weekends for you. I am doing very little tomorrow, just so I have some reserves for the week.
 
Sounds like STBX is realizing the gravy train is about to end. He didn't listen to you before. Why should you listen to him now? Let the divorce go final and good riddance.
 
@KarriB, to be fair, he offered. He even invited me to stay at his house. But I declined because he's a loose cannon. I never know how he's going to behave, and I didn't want to be vulnerable to his blow-ups if they occurred when I was unable to get up and get away. I also felt that any kindness would more-or-less come with a jacked-up price tag; "I did this, and therefore you owe me this." He tends to exaggerate his contributions and minimize mine, and I'm just so done with the bookkeeping and negotiations.

And he did a few things for me--lent me his cooler, brought me ice a few times--then turned around and referenced this as a reason for me to drop the divorce. ("Didn't I help you out with . . .?")
When his brother died and I helped facilitate transportation of the remains, military honors, and travel arrangements for him and our daughter a few weeks earlier, that didn't come with conditions or expectations; I just did it because he struggles with that sort of thing.

@PolarBear60, thank you. No, he didn't listen when we were raising young children together, or when I was raising our teenagers on my own. Now that they are out of the nest he thinks we should get back together to "take care of each other". When I encouraged him to access routine testing and procedures that he needs to take care of while the insurance was capped, he refused. Why would I want to beat my head against that wall any further, or take care of him when he refuses to take care of himself?

I didn't return his call yesterday, and shepherded my very low energy level, and I feel slightly more chipper today. In retrospect, I realize that all of the tests and the eye surgery was a lot to go through while I was recuperating, but the opportunity was too good to pass on. On the other hand, not having those done, and missing out on the chance to do them, would have been their own stress factors. Sometimes you just soldier on.

@Braunzie, I took your suggestion and made arrangements for some young friends to come over today and help with firewood, garage organizing, and some cleaning inside today. Three of my son's friends, two young men and a girlfriend of one will be coming. A free dental clinic was offered in our town, and this young lady took needed advantage of that. She had multiple cavities and needed to come back an extra day or two to take care of these, and as a result she lost her job. Infuriating, as I know how hard-working and reliable she is, and I'm confident that she didn't have medical coverage through her work. So I offered some extra work for her this week; a win-win during my transition back to full-time work.

@Slainte, thank you; that was 2x helpful, first for the routine you just laid out, and then for letting me know what that cost you in terms of energy. The next ten weeks are among the most demanding of our work year, and then I've got the divorce in three weeks, and will probably be burning firewood daily at that point to heat the house. I need to plan ahead and treat my energy like a resource.

So yes, taking a pass on the dithering, time-eating conversation that would ensue if my husband were to come out.
 
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snowleopard, you're doing a great job of taking care of yourself. We are acknowledging that and are encouraging you to continue to do so. Three weeks until the divorce? Will it be final then? Such a weight will be off your shoulders! You do not need to continue with that form of "bookkeeping" -- especially in a system guaranteed to drain your energy and make you the loser.

I'm so sorry to hear about the young lady losing her job for getting her teeth taken care of. From what you've described, I doubt she'll be out of work for long, and I'm thankful you're in a position to get some mutual benefit from the situation.

Yes, the medical matters do take a toll, but as you mention, not getting them done would take a toll, too, plus they would still need to be done. I'm glad you could do it now. Shepherding your energy for the next three months will be very important, but you can do it. Remember to plan and spread out as much of the effort as possible while still making good use of your time and energy. You got this!
 
@snowleopard - You ARE doing great! It is so admirable that you can do everything you're doing! I am so glad you were able to find some help with some things! I know for me, I hate to ask for help, but then I need to remind myself that sometimes people get more out of giving when given the opportunity. Sounds like this young gal will be benefiting from the opportunity more than just "feeling good".. Again, SO glad you were able to get some help. Hope you get a chance to rest today!
 
Just got caught up on your thread. Agree totally with the great advice and words of support given by the others.

In December 2008 I had a mammogram as part of a routine health screen. Something untoward showed up so I had to have a biopsy via ultrasound. I was utterly terrified. Not of the biopsy but of what it might reveal. I got the results two days before Christmas - a benign fibroadenoma - fatty tissue. I pay for a mammogram and consultation with my breast specialist once a year now - I am too young to have it done on the NHS and our insurance doesn't cover routine screening. Couple of years later another lump showed up, same procedure, same result. So I get how worrying this can be, just wanted to send good wishes and solidarity. As PolarBear60 said, you got this!
 
I completely glossed over the mammogram results. Since I retired, I've been using the VA for my mammograms, and this is something my VA does very well. They use digital devices, and they make me wait until a radiologist reads the results. If there are any questions, they take another view. I've have a couple views where I had to get another look with ultrasound, and, like Raffs, mine were determined to be fatty tissue. Here's hoping you get good news from yours, too.
 
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