@xyxex_kayn, I can really relate to the struggles you're having and the worry it's causing you. Hang in there, you are doing all the right things and it will get better. i found the pain quite manageable but the swelling was a going concern all the time. Rest assured, the swelling is normal (and frustrating!). I'm 5 weeks out from a bilateral TKR and am still battling the swelling by late afternoon/evening. But I found a couple of things that made a complete difference for me in starting to reducing the amount of swelling and also deal with pain and swelling overnight. Maybe the same things will work for you.
1. It sounds weird, but wrapping your knee in cling wrap (yes, like Saran Wrap) at night is amazingly effective! Here is a bonesmart link to the video that explains how to do it and why it works. I suspect part of why it works is also because it's applying gentle compression which really does help. It doesn't hurt your scar and the first night I did it I slept like a baby! I've been doing it every night since I found out about it around week 2 and swear by it:
https://bonesmart.org/forum/threads/night-pain-solutions-using-moist-heat-and-clingfilm.12794/
2. Compression is the other BIG key to helping with swelling, I found. My docs don't use compression so it didn't occur to me at first. Then I started reading protocols from various other hospitals and several mentioned that they send patients home with Ace Bandages to apply compression. So that is what I did. I used two bandages on each leg, one slightly below and one slightly above the knee (leaving about an inch free so I cold still bend it ). I wrapped them snugly but was very careful not to wrapp so tight that it affected my circulation. What a difference! I started this a couple of weeks ago and now after 5 weeks since surgery and a couple of weeks wrapping my knees, I can feel the difference in such a big way. I was nervous about doing it at first because I'm a "play by the rules" (most of the time!) kind of person and my doc had not told me to do this. But I reasoned that if doctors in other hospitals are sending the Ace bandages home wit h TKR patients, that it is clearly simply surgeon's personal preference. (Aside: I prefer the sports wraps as they are self adhesive and seem to apply a much nicer compression). I put them on first thing in the morning when the swelling is the lowest as that is the most effective, and leave them on for most of the day and then cling wrap at night!
Between these two tricks I am now able to bend my knees, am seeing the swelling get less every day and am sleeping well. But of course this is what worked for me, through trial and error you will find what works for you. What everyone is saying is true, the first couple of weeks are the hardest and the worry factor was huge for me. My leg was literally double its normal size and the swelling went from thigh to foot. But after a while, you will begin to see some of the improvements coming day to day and you'll start to feel better about it. You start to see that things are working, that you are improving and then one day you realize that you're really ok and it's going to work out. It just takes time and you working it in your way, with what feels right to you. I will echo what everyone is telling you here as well, don't worry to much about the other exersises that are not done in bed right now. It's impossible to bend when swelling is such an issue. Once the swelling goes down you will be able to bend.
Sorry for the long message, I might have gotten a bit carried away! Lol. Wishing you the best of luck and the gift of patience and peace.
Jackie