Hi everybody...I need to vent!!!
I don't know if luck isn't with me in the fall each year, but this is really nuts!.....I had my first TKR in October of 2009. 4 weeks post-op, my beautiful horse "Buddy" got very sick. So sick, that meds could not pull him out of it. After being scoped, the vet found that he had cancer of the brain, and it had eaten through to his sinus cavity. 5 weeks post-op, I stood in that field on crutches while we laid Buddy to rest. He was only 10 years old.
Sept. 2010 - revision on TKR and 3 weeks post-op we found out that one of the ponies we were anxious to buy had been sold, but was now up for sale again. Not the greatest time to add a new member to the family, but we didn't want him to go to any other home. We picked him up and he was skin and bones, sick and pretty much on death's door. (that would be "Diamond", my black and white Shetland). Where there is a will, there is a way, and I managed to get up to the barn each day to give him his medicine, shots and whisper in his ear to PLLLLEEEAAAASE get better. In December of 2010, he finally turned the corner and he's happy, healthy and the best pony I could ever ask for. He was my therapy...my reason to get outside and to walk....and to have a purpose.
Now it's October 2011 - 2 weeks post-op from a revision of the revision of the first TKR. (wow...that's a mouthful!). "Gracie", our black shetland that looks like Black Beauty came down with strep throat and sinusitis (there are names for these in equine talk, but you get the idea) and was losing weight FAST. Her eyes are all goopy and she's got gobs of "snot" running out of her nose. Basically...just a mess....and it came on sooooo fast! Now my hubby, who is the greatest man I've ever known, just could not give "Gracie" the 8cc's of penicillin by injection into her neck twice a day. That leaves only me. Again..."where there is a will, there is a way". It takes me about 10 minutes to "crutch" my way uphill to the barn and get "Gracie" into her stall. Hubby helps keep the others away from me so I won't get hurt if they start to run. (I've had horses most of my life, so giving shots really isn't a big deal to me, but it's very scary to somebody who has never done it). Well...I really thought 4 days ago I was going to lose her. We had a hard time getting the penicillin, and I was really getting angry!...as you all know, don't ever tick off somebody who's in pain! .....I got up each morning at 7am, gave her the shot and stood there and just cried. She couldn't lift up her head and she was so weak she could barely stand up. I just stood there with my crutches and rubbed her sore neck, then her back and anywhere else I thought it would make her feel good. During that time, I pretty much forgot about my own pain. We repeated the shot at 5pm that night. This has been going on now for 4 days...
I DO have a reason for writing (or venting) this, as I want all of you to know that no matter how bad a situation is, or how much you want to just give up, there is a strength in you that often we don't even realize we have. It usually comes from helping somebody or something else other than focusing on ourselves. We find that inner strength to deal with the situation at hand, for that is who we are.....strong people!
As of tonight, my "Gracie" is finally picking up her head and her eyes are looking a bit brighter. I brushed her and made her look "pretty" and wished her a good night. On my way down the hill, I heard a bang on the stall door and then the most beautiful sound I've heard in a long time....a whinny! I think she's going to be ok....we'll know in 4 more days, but it looks like the infection is backing off. It's too bad she still needs 4 more days of injections, but I'd be willing to bet that she knows that if I can get myself up the hill and to her, that she can handle a few more days!...and did I tell you?....she didn't even flinch!
I would appreciate any prayers you can send my way for "Gracie". I know she will hear them, for you are all great people!
