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TKR Lavender's getting a new left knee for Christmas

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Hi @tiredwife I love that movie we both do. Emmett Otter was always a tradition to watch for Christmas. We no longer have a vhs player but have this movie on vhs. It is like the gift of the magi hoping it will be shown on tv this year they seem to be putting more movies on at Christmas now . I also love The Homecoming with the Walton family set during the depression . Brings back some memories of the family traditions decorating the tree together as kids excitement of putting up the tree, Christmas baking , grew up in a large family so connect with it meaning, closeness of family, and how little things meant so much. Love this movie along with so many others.
Curl up on the couch with a blanket over my feet and relax as their stories are told. One of my Grams favorite Christmas songs was the Little Drummer Boy and she loved the movie to. Can see her now as she player her record, singing such beautiful memories of times we all shared and how special those days were. Holly
 
@lavender We have Emmet Otter on dvd, so I can watch it every year. I love the Christmas branch.
I watched the Walton's growing up! Every once in a while I will see the actors on something else and then I remember a certain show. There were 5 of us kids, the 4 being close together in age and me being 6 years later the baby of the family.
 
Hi @tiredwife I come from a family of 5 kids to. I have an older brother and three younger brothers we were all born within 2 years of on another and my youngest brother and I are 9 years apart. My husband is the youngest to there were 8 kids in his family now only my husband and his brother left . Every year we try to find one new Christmas movie to add to our collection so far we have not looked but have lots of them they are our favorite entertainment.

Today we watched "The Christmas lodge" Thomas Kincade love it also have the Christmas Cottage and love it to. Trying to get an early start seeing them as December is going to be very busy. Maybe we will look and see if we can find Emmet Otter at the video store up at our mall . Still early enough we should hopefully find it there. Lots of movies but some of them on vhs have replaced our favorites with dvd but still some we only have on vhs.

Our pantry cupboard is now a movie cabinet the movies have taken over but nice to have to watch over and over and many you never get tired of so always have something to watch. One more week and then my appointments along with my husbands appointments will start. time is going so fast.

Very cold here now lots of snow fell today and windy. Cozy sitting under the throw my husband bought me last Christmas made of plushy material and has a girafee a lion, other jungle animals very soft and warm and just nice to sit under keeps my legs warm. Almost time for bed, need to turn the furnace up a little kind of chilly with the snow blowing and ready to have a good nights sleep crossing my fingers. tired and ready to go to bed. Hope you have a great sleep to. Holly
 
@lavender Good morning! Hope you keep warm. It's been really chilly here, but is suppose to get up in the 50sF this weekend. We have a little stand beside the tv that we keep our dvds on. Always nice to have something to watch when we can't find anything on Netflix that we want to watch.
There are only 4 of us kids left. The oldest, my sister, died in a car accident a few almost 4 years ago.
We both have through blankets we use while watching tv. Mine has tigers and hubby's is a Harley blanket.
 
Hi @tiredwife It looks cold outside have not poked out yet to check but last night you could hear the wind it was really blowing so thinking we will have to dress warm today. So hard to have lost your sister in the accident this would be very hard to handle . No matter what still care so much for my family even with the issues with my Mom so many great memories and always thinking my Mom was the best. I always felt so very lucky with being part of my family we were all so close the loss of someone you love can change things. Who could have ever expected this to happen. Last year at this time we were shopping for her cookie baking supplies, picking up a few gifts she wanted to buy for her Grandchildren, and every day we had her out for either an appointment of just time to pick up her groceries, or just to sit together and talk.

Love sitting under my blanket It just feels so cozy on find it keep putting on and off then on again get hot and then cold and just like having it comfortable.

Today not much planned cleaned up the bathroom wiped up floors, wanted to do a few things a day to get things ready . Saving the traditional Christmas movies till closer to Christmas but have others that we are getting a head start on. Have a few Hallmark movies so maybe watching one of those today. Hope you stay nice and warm and hope you have a wonderful day Holly
 
@lavender we lost my dad about 15 years ago. He had heart and kidney issues, so it wasn't unexpected. My sister with her car accident was a shock. She had never been in an auto accident of any kind before, not even a ticket. She hit some black ice and hit another car head on. Those type unexpected deaths are the hardest to deal with. Saddest thing is that she was so looking forward to retiring in a few months. Well, such is life!

You have a great day!
 
Life has a way of throwing us some big curves. The loss of life is hard to deal with makes you really look at what matters brings back memories and puts what matters into a different light. My husbands brother died two years ago after watching his wife battle with cancer for so long he was emotionally worn out he loved her so much. His brother was getting ready to retire to he found out he had cancer just a little while before this and had made plans to do things he had waited to do he lived in the Yukon and worked and managed a business that insulated pipes.

He came home to our city where he was born and grew up and no one was told he was this sick he took care of his final needs at this time I think he wanted all finished next thing we knew he died. He had no children of his own and took great care to leave what he had to all of his nieces nephews and his generosity was how we managed after 10 years without to buy our car it was something he left in his wishes that we would have something warm to get about in so that my husband might have an easier time. My nephew bought a cleaning business with his portion, another helped to build a cottage. We had scrapped our last car after being hit by a car while out one day and before that had spent so much on repairs as the accident cause damage that started to show along the way.

Our store had been sold and although we wee as senior employees kept on pay checks were much smaller then before. Decided to go on our own walk ride our bicycles, and managed we were doing fine and happy but he wanted more for us. His death was something that hit my husband very hard and why now we have taken time away from getting another job to have time to take care of health issues, and have a little time to spend together and then time for my surgeries to. I make sure to take time each day to thank him talk to him so often and thanking him for the help he gave us so unexpected but how much it has helped. So needed to help when driving to see my Dad and getting my parents around and out for their things he helped all of us.

The men in my husbands family do not make it past 60 so taking care to give him a nice while and doing this has helped so much with issues with health that have given us many close calls Our nephew died the same way in a car crash coming home one night from work he was in a head on crash he was just 22 years old and died they said on impact cars on my husband side have been the cause of two other deaths as well due to the injuries his sisters had because of them. So sorry your sister had to die this way so sad good that you are in touch with your other family members still. Holly
 
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@lavender Holly I am a firm believer that our spirit lives on, so my sister and dad are still around and we will all be together some day. I believe in spirits in the form of ghost because I have had too many personal experiences not to! That is why death isn't that scary of a thing too me, but I have things I want to do with my hubby before my time comes like retiring to the Oregon coast. I want a few good years for us out there to really enjoy each other and have fun.
 
I agree @tiredwife I am a firm believer to and believe that my Dad my Gram my Gramp all are still with me to . I have always believed this way even from a tiny little girl I have believed. Not in a scarey way either but with love for the fact that they all meant so much to me and us and that they just did not simply disappear totally. Still in my heart with all they meant to me and still do. I talk to them still include them in my life daily always having a little thing to say to them. Even talk to my cats who have all died now and remembering how much I loved to hold them and care for them wonderful memories. Things have happened that make me believe to some people do not believe this is the way things go and that is ok but I do. When my Gram died I was so close to her loved her remember talking to my Mom on day she was saying things about things she needed to do with Grams things and her house. She did not remember after this saying any of the things she said but at the time thought it was not her it was my Gram we were in my Grams house and really believe she was the person that was talking to me. My husband respect how I think but the same night when he offered to go to her neighbors house next door who was also a friend of my family he said he saw my Gram at the end of her small driveway on the way down and then he said how could I have not a believer like me but he was sure he saw her waving at him.

When my Gram was in the hospital we went everyday on days we worked nights went in the morning. The hospital was just a short walk up the street and down the tracks to the gate at the back of our house and my Mom would take her home a few times a week to their house to spend time she had cancer she was going to die but she wanted to live just the same so a short trip to somewhere other then the hospital

Her wish was to go home to sit in her pretty little house and be with what she had missed. The hospital would call me at work I worked at Kmart they knew what was happening no problem they put the call through to me. Sometimes a nurse would call and ask if I was her grand daughter and she had asked if I could take her home that day it was her last wish to have these little visits. A few days they call would be my Gram talking and asking honey can you come. I would go right after work somedays they let me go early and getting her set in our car make the ten minute drive to take her home she was brave she never let you see how bad it was she was amazing all she wanted to do was lay on my Grampas bed we now think she was hoping she would stay there maybe not go back as she missed him so much.

She wanted this so much to go home so happy to have a chance to help her with this wish. My Gram did not talk about how she felt about people dying and never talked about spirits and ghost. She did one night see my Grampa one night though she thought she was dreaming and saw him at the end of her bed at home and in her dream which she realized was not a dream he had both hands, their floor squeaked with the wooden floor board he stepped on and their floors at this time were now carpeted. She never spoke much about this time but said she told him she wanted to go with him she missed him so much he said she was going to have to wait she was not ready yet. I think going home with me and a few with my husband and I she knew she was almost ready she was dying and hoping he would be there the next time and say he would take her with him.

My Gram died one night over night in the hospital it was on a night that I was working at our store. and the next day at work got the call from my Mom. The morning after the three day period of time off I went to work early as I did to set up my toy department my Christmas toys were pouring in it was about 8 oclock and store would not open for over an hour. A phone call was receive call for a phone call for toys answered it and a soft voice was on the other side of the line . Not normally getting calls that early I answered it and started to talk then realizing that the voice that sounded like my Gram as she was just before stopped me quick she had just died and then the voice stopped will never forget it like she was saying bye. the phone call ended just a Hello Hello. I find death scarey for me as find hard to wonder if my Dad is ok is he happy is he safe is he alright not scarey for my dying as I believe they are all waiting to see me again but afraid to ever be without my husband with me.

My husband is understanding of me understands but I believe so strongly I really believe that all the goodness and wonderful things that make us us just my opinion do not simply disappear some of those things stay behind even if it is just my way of handling how much hurt losing someone or some body like our pussy cats they leave a part of them with you even if it is part of how much they meant in your heart. Many things looking back as telling my brother trying not to upset him the other day that looking at a picture we took of him saw a light around him just his head and arm just before the day he died maybe I am crazy somethings are too clear but knowing this is just they way I believe and hoping some of it is true what keeps me from being as afraid. Holly
 
@lavender I have seen 'ghosts' before, first time, that I remember, is when I was about 8 and my parents and I went to look at this house that we were going to buy. It had a big basement room that was going to be us girls' room so I went down there while my parents were upstairs. I walked into the room and saw this old woman sitting at a table in the corner, I said something like "oh, I didn't know anyone was here" and she just sat there. I decided to go ask my folks who she was but as I left the room I looked back. There was no woman, no chair, no table! I didn't say anything because I couldn't quite process what had happened. Later I learned that the previous owner's mother had died in the house. That is the house I spent most of my childhood in. I have had other encounters.
 
I believe in the same things @tiredwife. I used to think I felt our kittens brushing up against me used to think I could hear them walking across the floor the way they did and one board in our living room has a little squeak so it would squeak as someone passing over it crossed. Sometime think I can hear my Gram and feel her soft hand touching mine. My thinking about the lady in your house that your parents were buying maybe she was watching to see who was moving in. One of life's mysteries. we all look at the reasoning differently. My Gram died in the fall just 8 years after we got married. She was very independant and never asked for help she thought she could do for herself and she could walk for miles we never knew she loved to walk

. She volunteered at our hospital after my Grampa died and she would go by bus to do her volunteering and caught the bus at the end of her street she never let anything get her down she was amazing. The spring that we moved into our townhouse after she died remembering a shape not anything really you could put your finger on but it was there a dark shadow or that is how it seemed in the corner of our living room where our hall tree now stands. Not sure how to describe what I saw but something almost looked like soft black chiffon not even there but I saw it. Think she stayed close but maybe it was someone else who had lived where we moved to but it was there still remember how it looked

This story if I told some may make me seem a little crazy but this is how it happened. We worked night shift at this time I had an extra day coming to me so my husband went to work on his own. Never minded growing up being on my own sometimes lots of friends to do stuff with and as kids are always something to do so sometimes just nice to spend time in my room doing my dolls or other stuff. I no longer like being on my own as much now like being with my husband and doing things together just not liking being on my own especially at night.

I was saying goodbye to him wishing him a good night getting ready to put on my night gown and waiting to bring the laundry up from our basement from the dryer waiting to hear they dryer had stopped.

I was now ready for bed and did not think I would be able to sleep right away so sat a little longer still waiting for the dryer.

It was somewhere around eleven o'clock now noticing as I looked out past the hall way into our kitchen by the telephone I saw a shape never before had this happened other then the shape that was described before. I saw a man this was a very clear vision he was wearing a light colored suit very light beigh almost cream he was older, he had white hair very thick and very tidy his suit was loose and soft and he was looking at me. Never spoke he was still , quite tall and looked like he was nice had a white old fashioned type mustache and his jacket was not buttoned.

I was scared not by his appearance but by the thought I saw something there still can see him in my memory made me scared so scared being alone that I was afraid to even go to the basement to get the laundry. I sat for a while really scared he was with me for a while then when he was not hurried to our basement pulled the laundry out and ran to the top. What would have happened if we spoke would he speak to. Wondering how to say I had seen this and how it makes some understand and others would think I had made it up still wonder if he was someone who had lived here or someone from my past was I seeing things no knew I had not imagined him he was actually three dimensional and not see through. He was there. My husband as I said is respectful of these things he listens and believes me but he does not believe this sort of thing happens he believes me but it is not his belief.

I can still see this man when looking back thinking people back so many years ago saw things to and how they were treated. He was not threatening but I was so happy when the morning came . I have never seen anything like this again never felt that again . My Mom told me that when my Dad died he would not have found his way home he was in a home 1 hour away so she said she did not think he was here. I disagree he has been not by visual proof but by the feeling that sometimes it is like things are going tough since he died things changed guess he was the one who kept things smooth. Feeling stressed worried and then a soft warm feeling comes over me peaceful feeling like he is standing by me and saying it is ok do not worry it is ok. I sound spooky but have always believed our spirits are amazing. The man that I describes looked one of my great aunts brothers she had only brothers she was an only daughter to and she had 2 sets of brothers who were twins. Looking at photo albums one day of older family pictures the man the visited me looks like her brother Peter never met hims but he looks the same first time seeing him up close by photo wondering he was this man. Holly
 
My daughter in law and son were visiting and she said when she walked in the living room she saw a man standing beside the fish tank. She described my dad, she had never seen my dad.
Odd thing is that when we bought this house we were told that the woman had died in the house on Christmas day. Her spirit stayed with us for many years. The most aggressive she was is when she through a fork across the kitchen and hit my hubby in the leg.
 
The fork would have scared you and your husband I would have been scared to be there. I have however felt things to. I have not felt anything for a while that I can really remember other then for the past week I have woke up hearing sounds. One night it sounded like someone dropped a small knitting needle it did not bounce just one sound in our spare bedroom. Have had a little look around but nothing small on the floor, my knitting needles are in a zippered bag and others are in a case so not a knitting needle. Last night I heard something drop not far from where I sit in our living room a shuffle sound of something falling nothing there but heard something move. My husband as I said is very patient listens to me and believes what I say but he is not a believer in the same idea about people doing this. I think I am the only one in my family that does or maybe some are not comfortable saying so but know how I feel.

I have a friend who believes as she has told me about things she has encountered so much so that she actually went to a physic to talk. I do not really believe in physics or maybe they do what they say just know what I have thought. She saw someone on her staircase one night she lived near us she told me that her Mom had a painting she did not really like. She kept taking it down off her wall and put it away for some reason she did not like it and it kept going back on its own.

Did not know how I felt about that when I heard it but who can say what is possible. She was very sure this was happening not sure how but it was happening. My Mom never believed what people say happens but now remembering she kept telling me that things she put somewhere moved she kept saying that things she looked for were missing and then somewhere else. we thought maybe she was not remembering where she put them and surprised she would say these things as she never believed things could happen. She told me one day that she was sure that my Dad was downstairs in his workshop one day she could hear him singing he was moving things around.

Books were moved from the big bookcase he built and the clocks that he built no longer chimed the large clock he lovingly kept wound on the wall above his chair stopped to.I did not say much about the things that I saw over my time as she being pretty open minded at one time not so long ago did not think these things could not be explained . My Dad did so many changes in the house I grew up in it was new when they built it I was only two when we moved there . He was always doing things around the house he could do anything and when he left things that he would have touched up and fussed over to make them work right were left he was no longer there to do the things he had always worked on.

I am a believer but did not understand her stories tried to and told her I did. Thought at the time she was trying to feel like he was still there and things that went unexplained were put on his being the one that did them. Knowing he would have done anything to make her safe and knowing in his way he would have tried whatever he could to make her feel she was not alone so maybe the stories of things moving were really happening. Hope so. Holly
 
@lavender after my dad died my mom was in bed and felt him sit on the edge of the bed. She will tell me things like that, but then will say she doesn't believe in ghost.
My daughter and I belonged to a ghost hunting group for awhile and formed our own group and did it until she moved out and got married. Her husband made too much fun of her about the ghost hunting. We had helped some people by being able to explain what they had experienced was caused by non paranormal things. We have helped some realize their ghost was friendly. We have caught some really strange stuff on videos, photos and voice recorders. We were in one house and my daughter looked down and a child was standing beside her. There where no children in the house at the time. I am a firm believer.
I believe some physics are real, but there are a lot of scammers out there.
I think that when people loose their wonderment at the mysteries of live they loose their ability to feel the spirits of those that passed.
 
Hi @tiredwife Your ghost hunting group would have been interesting and having both you and your daughter doing the group would have been something really neat. I think people feel things and just do not want to say they saw or heard something not sure how people will react but because they might not believe they just pass by and think it is just a coincidence . I think your experiences with the things you caught on tape or voices are very real. I am a true believer. Have you ever seen the movie The others with Nicole Kidman did not realize what was happening till the end of the movie but house inhabited by a family when already the family of ghosts was living there not knowing they were not living. I can remember my experience with both the corner in our living room and the man in the kitchen like they happened yesterday still a little uncomfortable about the man and where did he come from although he was not threatening takes you back a little.

I think if we just stopped each day and looked listened things that we try to make sense of are actually real they are just something that many do not believe in and therefore not noticed.

I used to watch our pussy cats and wonder what they saw. They would seem sometimes like they were trying to touch something that was not visible like they could see something we could not. people put this down to dust specks or sun shining in but think more to it then we might know.

I am a true believer always have been and the older I get the more I feel and think it is the way things are. Not sure how you feel about mirrors but older mirrors how many people have looked into them . My parents have a few antique dressers they have marble tops and all but one of these dressers was built by hand by relatives of our from the past and when my Dads Mom my Gramma died they were passed onto my Dad. One of these dressers has a very pretty mirror set into carved wood. The silvering on the mirror is worn and one time it was suggested by someone they had visit that the mirror would look even better if it was re surfaced some how my Mom said no she liked the mirror the way it was did not want to do anything to the reflecting part to change it.

I think I am the only one that believes in my family my brothers have never said how they feel sometimes little things I am feeling come out and people listen but someone always has a reasoning for why this feeling happened .

The time I mentioned before about the day that my Dad called me after my Grams funeral and asked if my husband and I could come that night to pack up dishes at my Grams house was not the only time that I felt that the person I thought I was talking to as it was that person standing in front of me was not actually the person that was talking to me. My Gram left me a set of dishes she told me all through my years that they were for me she had bought them the day I was born saving pieces all through the years her intention was that she wanted me to have these. She mentioned that they were to go to me when she died. Always said rather have her did not want to loose her she was wonderful so the day they were left to me so sad packing them as she was now gone material things she left could not replace her. My Dad wanted to make sure they were not broken when her furniture was moved out and things looked after so he asked if we could come. Felt that night she was in her house know that she was the person I talked to my Mom had no recollection of our talk she was the person that I talked through.


My Mom was not the person I talked to that night I knew it at the time my Gram was there know it was her as my Mom never remembered what she had spoke of she I believe spoke for my Gram never realizing this was how things worked. My husband saw her that night he had a hard time telling me he is not a believer but he saw her on his way to her neighbors for more newspaper he saw her he still says he did not comfortable with the idea she could have died and be in her driveway . My Gram was very special to all of us she was someone we will never forget same with my Dad . I have felt her many times, I know she has touched me and during the stuff that changed in my wonderful close family of that time has held me know she has how could people who are so important to people who they knew and love just go away we all believe in our own way but this is how I believe.

My Great Aunt Maggie was very old when she died . She was a very gentle little lady and she was Diabetic to she must have believed some of the thing that I do because when complications of her Diabetes caused her to loose her leg so many years ago she asked that her leg be buried so that when she needed it again it would be there for her. Early days when people might not have talked about these things but she believed to or think so as she believed her leg was needed. Thinking my Gramma did to . Holly
 
I started working for Kmart when I left high school started when the store was being built and helped to set it up before it opened. Our store had a ghost later on in years working there I was told that this store had a ghost. I did not see anything when starting out not until we started nights daytime shifts were filled with sound of cash register, and customers talking, hustle and bustle never thought anything was strange. knew at the time we had lost people we worked with some of cancer many had started working to help with their family expenses so most of the people who did die were then at the age I am now and some had complications in their health that caused their loss of their lives.

People never talked about ghosts, there was a stairway that was built when the store was build and it was called the stairway to nowhere as it went no where it went down from the upper stockroom level down to a little landing no opening to exit from it so you went up again went no where. There was also a large opening to the side of the proper stairway going up to the stockroom level a steel door opening and although after working so many years in our store and knowing almost every knook and crany in it after working for so long but really never knew what this was for. Like a window in the wall with heavy steel doors never needed to ask as never needed to be in there. While working nights I experienced what had been said by people who spoke of a ghost and the strange things that were happening it was a little quieter at night fast paced but not as loud as the days filled with the hustle and bustle of cash registers and other things.

My main depts were toys and shoes but worked where ever needed so one night working in fashion on a ladder on my own heard a voice do you ever get the feeling you are being watched no one around but like you are not on your own so busy with the amount I was trying to do that I put it down to being tired but heard a soft voice a womans voice and crazy as it sounded it sounded like the voice of a friend of mine who had at the time a number of years before died. Called back coming Marge when the soft voice called my name in a sing song way very soft but still there. Then after the second time saying to myself how could it be Marge she died. more then 5 years before this night. No one was around we were all so busy and if they were they would have had to be closer then just being a few aisles over as the voice was soft and would not have been heard otherwise.

I had the same experience the next night this time in shoes I used a trolley cart to move my freight around loading aisle by aisle and sorting as I went only to find the cart that I had loaded was not where it had been left I had moved probably 5 feet or more away within eye sight but I was so busy I did not notice heard nothing no squeaky wheel nothing but it was not where it was left thinking I had mad an error and it was where it had been placed but it happened again and checking carefully before leaving it noticing after it was time to get more shoes it had moved again . Mr Marsh used to like moving my cart to have some fun not sure probably just one of those things but funny how it moved and how much like he used to move it. No one on our team moved it would have seen or heard them but it had moved. One night our personal lady helped out she knew how much had been received with the heavy Christmas stock and brought a few people from the days shift we knew with her. It was the personal lady who commented at our break that she had placed stock on a wall display only to find it on the floor it was all over. She went back and the same down a counter side afterwords she had heard stories of this people actually scared and asked to come off nights she put it down to pranks but then decided it was happening.

It can make you thing wondering who was doing it had the field that the builders dug up ever had any form of burial of family's on it there were farms there before this time the land after that had been sold to our university and then people The road that the mall was build on was when I was a small girl a place that we went for car rides on a Sunday farmland people who doubted it said it was silly but those who saw things asked and wondered why was it just coincidence or could something have caused it.
 
@lavender I did see that movie! It is a different view of ghosts not knowing they are ghosts. I believe most ghosts don't mean any harm. However, if a mean nasty person dies and his or her ghost remains it can be mean and nasty. Most of what we encountered was friendly, however in a very old bar in a nearby town we caught sounds that didn't sound friendly at all. It use to be a brothel and people were killed there. Most of the employees would go to the top floor by themselves and some refused to go at all. They just used it as storage.

In one old mansion we got a photograph of a woman in a window, but no one was in the room at the time, and it was impossible for her to be that high in the window without standing on a ladder.

Too many things not to believe. Yes your Gram is looking out for you.
 
Hi @tiredwife Seeing the things and hearing the sounds you heard would make it hard to not believe in spirits and ghosts. I do not believe ghosts are trying to scare people either think if they are around you maybe they are just lost not sure what happened to them and trying to find their place.

I felt my Gram in her house just after she died when we went to pack up and help to take care of her things she was there. We went the next night just after this with my Mom and my youngest brother to help know she was there my Dad was working till midnight at that time in the school so he was not with us. Know she was there that night not by talking to her but just by feeling her. We all have our own special things things that make us us and those things I believe stay behind at least that is how I believe even if it is just how I want to believe.

My Dad wanted me to have some of my Grams things my Dad asked me to go into her rooom and see if anything of hers I wanted towel, sheets, stuff like that. He was always this way he told me that if I did not take any of these things home he knew the girls sister in laws would be sure to take them so I went and looked. Hard to look through someones things when there was always such a res pect for their privacy never looked through drawers as some do like my one sister in law just seemed to invasive towels and sheets were on her bed. I found a few knew that they were her favorites still have them pink and white terry towel striped and another pink with rose flowers she loved pink. just wanted these few.

I asked for one thing when offered to see if any of her clothes would fit only one thing and that was her Camel hair coat she had worn it for many years even so it was kept nice and my reasoning was it smelled the way she smelled it was like being with her tolding it in my arms when trying to make sense of all of it not to wear it was her coat just to take home and hold brought me closer to her she was gone but not believing she was all gone.

She used to give me clothes she worked in a ladies clothing store for many years and when she saw something marked down or maybe just thought it would look nice for me she gave it to me so used to her giving me clothes some were things she did not wear and being at that time we were both almost the same size they fit.

When she died my brother was given her house my older brother they were having problems and my Mom thought this might help keep things together and being the oldest she said it was supposed to go to the oldest by tradition so he moved in. Never felt my Gram there again never felt like she was there. Thinking she had left seeing her little house now changed over and things she had taken away she had left wondering if she did not feel like she still belonged there but no more Gram.

I have however felt her in our home told her when visiting her one night at the hospital that I loved her she told me she loved me to so many times she was very open with her feelings and this night I took things with me that I had made and knitted and the things that I had bought for my brother and his wife for her baby shower. Told my Gram we would take her to the shower we were holding all little duckies on the decorations she was so proud so proud that a baby was coming and called the nurses over this was the last time she would be this aware as she died the night after knowing she saw the baby even before we did know she did.

My Gram invited me back to the hospital that night my husband was going bowling and we had stopped in to my parents house that day to take her back to the hospital we took turns our turns we took her to her house she had that as her last request to go home and visit her house. After picking her up to take her back to the hospital she asked what I was doing that night thinking that she would be tired she said she would love to see me so I went again after taking my husband to the bowling alley. Our visit was wonderful she was excited she loved life and she talked to me we spoke of our common love for one another how proud she was of all of us and how much she loved us told her that when we were small so many things both her and Grampa did with us making our time with each of them special and knowing now how tired they must have gotten she said she loved every minute of our time.

I never had this chance again the next night early morning she died never to have had this chance with her again but even before receiving the call she had died knew something was not right working and feeling unsettled when the call came cried but somehow knew it had happened.

Before this time on that night she tried to tell me something she kept moving her hand in the way to bring me even closer then shushing it away wondering what she wanted to tell me always wondering what she would say wondering if she knew how things with her house were going to go knowing she knew more then she was saying she was a very strong woman tiny but strong. My Mom never had an easy time expressing how she felt she was still so wonderful but never could put her feelings into words she never cried during this time she said she was too busy I understood but not really as she told me just a while ago she still did not cry.

My Gram never let you wonder she told you honestly with kindness but she was very open my Mom never understood why I cried she thought it was only her who had lost she did not understand how we all grieved as she was the only one she thought needed to and she could not. understand . Did she know she would die so soon she was not well cancer was spreading but wondering what she would have said that night knowing she wanted the best for all of us and did not want to leave and knowing how much her leaving would change things she would not want this to happen. My Mom never talked about things she felt or saw not till my Dad died she then talked more know she has felt the things that I have but she does not feel comfortable with them , she was their only child and growing up so close to her parents some people actually thought they were sisters, they did so many things together and know if she could my Gram would try to stay with and help her through it her she loved her very much.
 
Today the weather is much milder still cold but the snow has almost totally melted rained last night so grass and sidewalks are bare. Tomorrow is going to get much warmer we have been in the minus temperatures over the past few weeks and tomorrow the temp will go up to 13 celsius about 55 degrees so it will be nice. Time is flying by and 29 days to go till my knee replacement everything is ready to go bars will go in the bathroom within the next week something they said they do for anyone needing help in their home so happy our neighbor told us to talk to them as sure it will help. Yesterday we watched a few of our Christmas movies the first movie we watched was a Hallmark movie "The Christmas Shoes and then after supper we watched the movie "Elf very funny. Not much happening today did some cleaning yesterday and then picked up a few groceries and then watching our movies. Not started shopping yet usually done by now but watching our money in case the bank messes up with our pension money again.

Not spending too much this year just wanting to be together but thinking I can find a few nice movies for my husband he will enjoy movies are a passion we share love movies. Last year we bought a cookie press from Micheals on 50 percent off coupon day found one for my mom to so going to have a look at it this year and bake some shortbread cookies. Used t bake lots at Christmas and make plate for family and friends to enjoy but now not eating sugar being we cannot eat it so not baking as often now. Our tree will be put up next week usually make room in the corner of our living room but putting it up by our window looks pretty there. I made a nice tree skirt when we moved here made of green felt with teddy bears and candy canes and it has been used for 25 years now.

The little girl next door to our home when we moved in helped me she sat and talked to me while eating cookie we had made and really liked her always told her to ask her mom and dad and they were happy she was welcome to sit and keep busy. The only problem is she got very excitied watching me sewing it and her little hand went out to touch something and down went the sequins but she helped me find them in the patio tiles each with a little pin picking them up. This tree skirt has a lot of memories.

A while ago I found a tree skirt in Mary Maxims also made of felt it was a Mary Engelbreit tree skirt had a coupon that day to and it was 20 percent day to so bought it all covered with things she draws and very pretty made of many tiny felt pieces and thought it would be nice to give to one of my family as a gift but everyone has their own traditions so making it for us ours is still so nice but wearing as our pussy cats loved laying on it while laying under our tree and our youngest kitty Katie loved the sequins so some of these are missing, but still use it every year Teddy bear family all dressed up in little dresses baby ones in sleepers and the Daddy wearing a bow tie and a little vest it took time to make drummers boys with little drums and candy canes which needed to be embroidered. loved making this tree skirt worked on it the first summer we moved in and how many hours of sewing the tiny decorations loved making it. Little Caroline was our neighbor she was the one when we were moving in that told us how things worked you put your garbage here on the day she would say then this is where you go when you need help she pointed at their door. She was our own version of the welcome wagon We enjoyed her she would come over and sit on the stairs or chairs with me and we would talk her family was from Poland and she was just such a nice kid. she was only small probably 5 when we move here. My husband and I were upset seeing one of the other neighbors kids who was always getting into trouble ring her doorbell and throw sand at her she was mean but Caroline was not she was a very likable little girl very busy and so excited about the things around her we did not have children so enjoyed her coming for a visit the only thing was word caught on that we liked kids so many times found our front yard busy others started to come to watch the building of the tree skirt to and it could get a little busy.

We never had too many kids for Halloween most people went to the mall where they could walk about in their costumes and most stores gave out candy but my husband and I made sure we had a special kind of candy for her special kind of chocolate or candy she was a nice girl nice family, moved away 10 years later wonder how she is doing they moved back to Poland we were told but so nice to have her spend time talking and watching me sew. Little Caroline also helped us plant our garden or at least she tried her bulbs went in upside down she tried. Memories of times without need of medication walked for miles loved to walk then it was a pleasure, so many wonderful things that we do during our lives the good outweigh the bad so many things to remember each day is a way of building memories each day a little more memories that all go together to make us who we are and the wonderful things that our lives have to offer to us. Holly
 
Well today is the day now starting to embroider a few Annie faces have a few little aprons and panties cut out from last time and dress material for the dresses and wool just the right color for their hair so the Annie building centre is now opening up starting to get things going to make some Raggedy Annes as after surgery it will be a little while before sewing as it is hard to sit for that long . Keep seeing them like they are calling me come make us we are waiting. Am I crazy hearing them maybe but love these little dolls part of Christmas and this time I can take my time.

They were advertising in the paper the other night for gifts for kids in the hospital who will be there for Christmas and thinking if I can get a few done they might be nice for someone with a small child who needs something to hug or even a baby who is there born for Christmas to their parents. Hoping to get started the faces are the first step asking my husband to move my sewing machine into the living room so that I can sew as I watch not as much rush to get them done this time around but thinking early enough to do them before surgery time when the month of December will be so busy with appointments. Have the urge to knit a baby outfit to no one I know is having a baby but maybe there is a reason for this feeling the need. Love to knit baby stuff so pretty and tiny and imagining a baby wearing them ..

Getting ahead of myself but that is what life is all about being as my Mom used to say excited about something every day look for something that makes you excited if you look close enough you will find it even on sad days counting the blessing that helped you get this far along in your life and the people who helped you along with the memories they have left us with.
 
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