Jeff,
I too live in NJ, and I had my surgery in NYC also, but at NYU Joint Disease Hospital, not HSS. HSS is very excellent, my golf buddy who has severe osteoarthritis had several surgeries there, they changed his life. So good for you to pick one of the best places to get this surgery.
I am 20 years older than you, I had my left hip replaced two years ago this month and my right hip replaced 4 months ago. I waited 9 months or so once the real pain started to do my left hip, but then when my right hip started to get bad early this year, I did not wait at all. I was very scared too, but I am pretty stoic, I just wanted to get it over and get on with life. I am mostly retired, I have been golfing now for a month (3 months after surgery), and I do not notice either hip; and I am more flexible than I've been in 30 years. No joke. I am going to the gym, playing golf, running after grand kids, enjoying life, you will get your life back too.
I hope this will help: We are all scared of these surgeries. But they are now pretty routine, so that at a place like HSS, where they do hundreds of these per year, the success rate is VERY high. In my case, this June, I was walking laps on the hospital floor with a single elbow crutch just 8 hours after I was brought to my room, and I was released and went home after about 36 hours. (They gave me a set of crutches, a walker, a shower chair, and some other stuff in the hospital to take home). I did not even use the walker after the second hip. (This is probably not so typical, but it is possible). I liked elbow crutches much more than having a cane, but that's just me.
Please read my two recovery threads which you'll find below in my signature, I think they'll help you understand what to expect from the surgery. The most important things I would tell someone about these surgeries:
a -- The surgeon will take care of the surgery, you need to work at the recovery phase, which includes PT as directed, painkillers to keep the pain at bay. Doing PT at home (which they arranged for me at the hospital) and then outpatient PT after about 3 weeks, were very important to me to do. Taking painkillers so you do not suffer while you heal is super important too. I think that I healed faster and got off the painkillers faster by never letting myself suffer after the surgery.
b -- After surgery, you will be very tired. I mean VERY tired for a few weeks. Accept it. Understand that your body is healing. I slept every day all afternoon after both surgeries. I woke up, had breakfast, read the paper, did my PT, did some work, had lunch, then took an oxycodone which put me right to sleep. It was the best thing I could do.
If you have questions, let us know, people here are the best, everyone will help. Both before and after your THR.
Best of luck,
Mark
United States
Seriously though make sure you take enough time off work to both physically recover from the surgery and to get your brain past the "brain fog" lots of us seem to get following surgery. It may be boring, but a couple of months well spent giving your body a chance to recover from major surgery will really pay dividends for the rest of your life. 
