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Depression/post-op blues - open for all

@luvinlex and @Timetolive - oh thank goodness someone else understands! The loss of hair. I am an axious soul and the fact that my hair, like yours is getting thinner and thinner and stringy and lank. I, too, have avoided washing it as long as possible and dread seeing how much the comb holds afterwards. all of this adds to the anxiety - it is a vicious circle.
 
So true, and as I had mentioned, it's in "real time" and you're not reading posts from 2011!
 
Timetolive said:
I did not know there were nurses assigned to be hand holders.
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I should have said "self appointed"! It was a tongue in cheek comment.
Timetolive said:
I asked my GP about it and she said it was from the surgery - not the FIVE weeks of diarrhea I have had from the diverticulitis attack I had a month after surgery.
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luvinlex said:
Another girl who had the hair loss like we do, said it was because with a major surgery, you're under anesthesia an extended amount of time and that is the cause of the hair loss.
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Well the are both wrong! It's emotional stress/depression/anxiety that causes it.
Miss Muffet said:
I, too, have avoided washing it as long as possible and dread seeing how much the comb holds afterwards.
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@Miss Muffet washing it isn't responsible for it falling out. It's already separated from the hair follicle but being retained by the surrounding hair. Washing it just removes it.
 
Thanks very much @Josephine - I assumed washing would weaken it, but am glad to be put right on that score. I was also told that certain NSAIDs could cause hair loss, so asked to be swapped to a different one. Perhaps you can advise more on this? So it is the stressing/anxiety thing that is doing it. It did happen to me a few years ago when I was in the midst of getting a particularly nasty character out of my life (and my home). Being pushed about mentally and physically was an enormous strain which resulted in a very stressed me, hair loss and other anxiety-related medical problems. They DID subside in time and my hair DID regrow. I must concentrate on positive thoughts, breathing techniques and try to relax and let go whenever possible. Am feeling more focussed on the surgery (and hoping for a date to pin it on) so it must be the pain and frustration that goes with it that is the source. Getting the mix of rest and remaining mobile is the tricky part. Thank you once again.
 
Miss Muffet said:
@luvinlex and @Timetolive - oh thank goodness someone else understands! The loss of hair. I am an axious soul and the fact that my hair, like yours is getting thinner and thinner and stringy and lank. I, too, have avoided washing it as long as possible and dread seeing how much the comb holds afterwards. all of this adds to the anxiety - it is a vicious circle.
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Well, just be thankful the hair WILL grow back. Play with a short hairstyle for awhile maybe even change the color! Go from brunette to blonde, or even red! I think that would be a lot of fun. I know I'll at least cut it to my shoulders and maybe even shorter. I'm sure that will make it look thicker. I've already Googled images of "Women very short hair" and there are lots of cool styles.
 
I have studied the cause of this hair loss, and was interested if other people experienced it. It happened when my mother died 3 years ago and I was her caregiver in her own home. Incredible stress, lack of sleep, poor diet, and then the trauma of watching her take her last breath. About 3 months later, which is normal for this type of condition. ( Telogen effluvium) This article ( please read, it's short but answers the question ) with authoritative advice from the Mayo Clinic, describes it simply and accurately. I did not say that anesthesia causes the hair loss, only that a friend of mine thought that's what caused hers. ANY physical or emotional stress is the likely cause. I'm glad the Administrator pointed this out for everyone. There is nothing you can do, no special shampoo, no food or vitamin, no scalp massage that will make this stop. It will stop once you start growing hair back in the follicles where they were lost. You'll see tiny short hairs start to appear and that's the beginning of the new growth. I lived through it, I did have to deal with thin hair and appreciated the fact that I've always had thick hair and it's not as noticeable as someone with naturally thin hair. Your hairdresser can give you advice on short hair styles while you wait for it to grow out. Just don't do anything to pull out what healthy hairs you have left such as pull it back and hold it tight with a pony tail holder. Wash it as usual. Again, there are X amounts of hair you will lose, not washing just delays the inevitable. The article also discusses diet and other less common reasons for your hair loss. It is not ONLY stress and trauma. Happy still... your hair WILL grow back. In my opinion, it didn't grow back nearly as thick and curly as it was before. Link is safe and has been checked. It should be the end of any speculation. Hugs to you all. Hang in there and all you can do is be patient.

https://www.livestrong.com/article/305154-is-hair-thinning-from-stress-permanent/
 
Thanks all of you for the hair loss advice.:console2: To be honest if I have it cut short I will look bald!
Am due at the hairdressers next week and will chat through options in detail.
AND I will try to stop being a worrier! :yes!: What a great gang you all are!!! XxxX :yes::SUNsmile::)
 
I agree with each and every one of you. I can say I really had no one to confide in or talk to, I didn't know these forums existed. I walked into the hospital, through the doors, checked in. I remember being called but I was so petrified, I remember hardly anything until 2 days later when I left for rehab. I don't remember eating, I remember the nurses putting my legs in the special pillow, I remember the rehab people and walking but as soon as I sat back down and quit moving my memory goes. Right before I left I was given a chest xray I am told, but don't remember. My mind was foggy for weeks, my skin pealed off like a sun burn, my mouth was so dry my tongue stuck to the roof of my mouth, nobody put lotion on me in rehab or offered. Once home my live-in boyfriend wouldn't do it either said it was gross. I was depressed for weeks, wished I had never had the surgery, hated life. Now 5 months later I am still suffering super dry mouth and skin but can take care of myself, boyfriend after 15 years I have left. Found out how much I meant to him after all this...still having pain doctor said T band that he cut through this sent me to rehab for messaging, helped while being done but didn't last, I have a roller but difficult to roll the side of thigh alone. I still have sad days a lot of heartburn doctor said is stress related so hopefully when things smooth out, it will all go away. Good luck to us all:prayer:
 
I can't hardly believe what I wrote only 4 days ago. The difference? I had someone who cared. Someone that understood depression but also knew it was ME that needed to make it better. It was ME that had to get things done. Knowing how I felt and how overwhelmed I was, she helped a lot by taking care of tasks. When you are in the depths of depression, you don't care if the dishes are piled in the sink, that your trash can is overflowing, that your hair is filthy, there might be weeks of mail in your mailbox because nothing seems to matter. The longer I stayed isolated, the worse things got. I'm lucky I can email my GP, she's a huge help and always replies the same day. So much better than making an appt. to just ask a simple question. Saves her time and saves me the bother. Bottom line is, **support** is what will help you most. Especially when someone actually knows how to do it without making it worse or telling you "man up" or "shake it off" ( which can then make you angry ). I'm going to talk to my surgeon tomorrow and will tell him I feel a follow up on your emotional well being would be a helpful part of your recovery. I'd bet if he had his patients fill out questionnaires a few months post-op, he'd have a better awareness of his patients and their needs. ( in my dreams ) Fingers crossed this was a one time bout and there are no more to come. It feels good to join society again. :dancy:
 
I wish I had seen this site sooner! I'm 8 weeks post-op of an anterior left total hip. I'm really struggling with my surgery. I have a new leg-length discrepancy of 2-2.5 cm. I have never limped before and now I definitely have a significant limp. I've been so blue and sad about the whole thing. I feel self-conscious about it and I'm struggling with my new body mechanics at work (I'm a diagnostic Sonographer), and have been very frustrated. I struggled with every aspect of this surgery, from pain control to benchmarking my progress (I don't know how to measure my recovery with this surgery). I stumbled on this discussion, and I'm just happy to hear I'm not crazy after all my tears of sadness and frustration. This was a HARD surgery for me, even after many other surgeries. I just wasn't prepared. But I'm glad to have found this site!!
 
Good morning (it is morning over here) @sonogirl - how lovely that you've joined this site. From a bag of nerves I have been slowly soothed by the warm and practical support here. I'm so sorry to hear you've had an unsatisfactory outcome. There are people qualified to answer some of your worries and I know they will pick up and help in any way possible. Don't lose touch X
 
@sonogirl Welcome to BoneSmart! So glad you found us.
sonogirl said:
I have a new leg-length discrepancy of 2-2.5 cm.
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Almost every new hippie feels there is a leg length difference. But in most cases this just eases and disappears. Have you had a measurement taken? It's usually recommended to wait until you are 3-4 months out of surgery to take a measurement. Here's a link on this from our Library Leg length differential - LLD
 
Thank you for the article on leg-length discrepancies. It was a bit reassuring. When I saw my surgeon post-op, he told me that it was long. I'm 2 months out now and I just feel like I'm really struggling. The more I limp around, especially at work, the more self-conscious and frustrated I am, and the more blue I get. I'm sure it will work out. It's helpful hearing everyone else's experiences too. Thanks!
 
@sonogirl Do you have a good physio or podiatrist? As the article describes, you can get measured and possibly use a lift in one shoe. That would ease your limp. I used a lift for almost 5 years and it did help.
 
I am so happy to have read everyone's input.....it makes me feel "normal" ? I wondered why I felt down, thought it was the snowy winter we were having in the Pacific Northwest. I am almost 3 months post L-THR. I have been walking everyday since week 3, about 30 to 40 minutes per day and I do my PT exercises that they gave me in the hospital. My numbness has gone, but at times I feel a burning sensation and I wonder what causes this.....maybe tendions coming back or muscles ? Best wishes to ALL of you
 
Excellent thread! Of everything about my surgery I was most surprised by the gloom. I had no pain, no complications, I had visitors and lots of attention. It was summer. So hard to express the feelings of being overwhelmed, the anxiety. Thankfully I found Bonesmart and so many compassionate people around the world. In the middle of the night when I was wound up I had my friends in the UK to talk me down! THANKFULLY it is temporary but you have to give yourself time. I am at six months now and my hip is fine. I got the shingles about a month ago and still suffering the nerve pain, so perhaps I am not as relaxed as I think I am.
 
Hi, I'm at day 11 of hip 2. and to be honest I don't feel anything as good as the first. It went well I think but I feel miserable. There have been a couple of days if I could have driven the car into the docks I think I might have. This sounds very melodramatic and I can't understand why. My husband has been really good, as usual, as have the kids. Friends as well, but I don't want anybody around.Lack of sleep is not helping as I have to get up every couple of hours to move my knee( also arthritic) which is black and blue and pretty swollen. Sorry for sounding so miserable esp since so many others have a hell of a lot worse than me.
 
I have actually started talking to people about this depression thing just to see reactions. I do not think most of my friends believe me, my "style" in life has never been one of excess emotions. (my husband actually has that role...but he also has a Dx of bi-polar) Crazy up and down feelings, one powerful (?) thing I did...the surgical center has a website for patients to post how wonderful the care was, medical care was good. Emotional support totally absent. Suggested they might want to explore this need, gave them a couple ideas. Actually got a response "thank you for your comments"... Trying to be ok with there isn't a "reason" for feeling down and trusting it will pass. Would help if sleep wasn't optional and pain not still constantly nagging and asking for attention. Finally not raining everyday (live in the U.S. Pacific NW...little bit of sun shine goes a long way.)
 
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