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2 weeks left to chicken out.. my random thoughts

It's tough being a mum, isn't it......if we're not worrying about something or feeling guilty, we start worrying that we're NOT worrying! Comes with the job, and no-one warns you before you have them.....but then we wouldn't swap for anything, would we? Your hips are NOT your fault, and you're a lovely mum who just wants the best for your children.....keep telling yourself that and chase out all that doubt.
 
@Mascaramom guilt comes hand in hand with being a mum doesn't it? You spend all day feeling guilty that you're not doing enough for them or too much. You have shouted at them too much, you have not shouted enough etc etc. STOP right now my friend! Your hip pain is not something you should feel guilty about! You are the one suffering not them. They still have your love which is all they need in their life! I was born with my pelvic deformity and I am now 53! I have days when I think why didn't I complain sooner? Why did I not think that there was a problem when I was in pain? I couldn't walk properly for months after childbirth.....doh!!! Anyway my point is I didn't because as women I think we just put up with pain, it's in our DNA so we can put up with childbirth! You are doing something now for you and your family. This is the easy part. The hardest part is putting up with the pain and not knowing what it is. You are now on the road to sorting it out. Well done you! We all cry in the wee hours but cry no more! This is the start of the rest of your pain free life!!

:running::biking::fasthorse::tennis::swim::bicycle1:
 
Sometimes it's just everything...but you will be getting this hip thing sorted out soon.
The children will probably be surprised to see you fragile. Mine were and they are young adults.
But it is a good thing for them to be be able to help in small ways.
It's okay to let our family take care of Mom a little....think temporary.
Chronic pain and an upcoming major surgery? Can't imagined why you would feel anxious..:shrug:
You will have tons of support here!
 
All of your feelings are normal @Mascaramom. I had guilt about not being able to do things with grandkids and things at work. No matter what our situation we hate that these hips keep us from living and we try to power through it and realize we can’t.

Even though you couldn’t do the things you thought you should be doing, you spent the day with your girls. This will soon be behind you. Focus on the fact that you are doing something about your condition.

I agree staying busy this last week will help. Bone on bone pain will soon be gone and a new start on life will begin.
 
@Bevlah @MammaT @anny @Mojo333 @Layla

I woke up this morning and went straight for the forum because I felt that I needed some encouragement before my feet even hit the floor. And sure enough that's what I got!
All of your words REALLY hit home.
Today I am making an effort to focus on the FUTURE and the groceries, and the laundry, and the puppy, and the kids Softball practice....
Right AFTER I drink another cup of coffee... lol
HAPPY MONDAY FRIENDS
 
Mascaramom said:
I realize that surgery will make that a reality again, but I still can't shake the guilt that I allowed this to happen to myself because I didn't take care of myself in some way shape or form. The guilt that im letting my husband down somehow. (Not that he EVER made me feel that way) I know it sounds stupid.....

I counted the hours today, until I could put the girls to bed, take a hot shower and just CRY!!! I HATE wishing my days away like that.
Click to expand...
Please don't feel the guilt like that you sound like a wonderful mother and wife you are now on track to a new and full life with your family . Like my wife family is everything and what you are now doing is as much for your family as yourself. Stay strong and keep positive in 6 months time things will be fab. :SUNsmile:
 
Hi Mascara! Having a lack of mobility can really limit your life, and as hip pain progresses, your world gets smaller and smaller, and you have to give up more and more. The gift of this surgery is you will be getting back what you lost! All of your feelings are completely normal. And as the others have said, keeping busy will help you....

We are here for you and rooting for you....:yay:
 
Hi @Mascaramom
You're attitude is very healthy!
Busying yourself is the best distraction right now. In the anxiety filled days leading to surgery
I'd kept reminding myself, just like Scarlett O' Hara (fictional movie character) that I couldn't worry about
surgery today, I'd worry about it tomorrow, lol! I kept pushing those unpleasant anxious thoughts to the back of my mind and continued moving forward.

Focusing on hubby, the girls and recovery right now should keep you pretty busy. Keep coming here also to draw strength. It doesn't matter if you wah, wah each time because we'll scoop you up and dust you off, it's a promise, sweetie! Hope today is great!!
 
@Mascaramom I hope you are up to that birthday party! :) My daughter is turning 12 on Feb 28 and I had promised her to get her hair and makeup done--so she is shown how to do makeup properly (and not too heavy!) and she was supposed to have her best friends sleep over afterwards. Well, we had to change things around after I got my surgery date. Didn't think I would be up to a couple of hours in a beauty salon and four hyper girls running around (don't get me wrong--her friends are fabulous). So this weekend is her big birthday weekend and we'll do something low key on the actual day. I feel like I'm letting her down having to move things around on her, but we do the best we can as moms right.
 
Aloha! @Mascaramom I picked up some jigsaw puzzels to work on when my grandson comes over. I don't know if your girls would be interested in puzzles, but I am sure you will have some great ideas. When my parents drove from Alaska to New England (we had lots of that type of journey) my Mom had games for us in the car. There are lots of fun activities you will be able to do with your girls. Coloring? I think Mom had it planned so there was a new 'something' every day.

I know you are stressed about your girls and we don't want you to be stressed. I hope I threw enough spaghetti on the wall that some stuck
 
what AgilityDog reminded me of something when my lot were young (I had 4 under 5 so they were all very close in age). I had to go away for a few weeks to do some training for a new career, and they were getting slightly worried, so before I went I organised a small 'something' for them to open every day when they got back from school.....maybe a small toy, chocolate bar, or a joint one promising a trip to the pictures with their nan and grandad, etc. They were so excited wondering what the day's surprise was going to be I don't think they remembered to miss me! It was quite a lot of work organising it beforehand but also a lot of fun :wink:
 
Hi @Mascaramom. I hope you had a good day looking forward. You’ve received some good advice. My kids had to tolerate me having a couple of surgeries when they were younger. They actually did a good job helping mom. It’s good for them to learn how to care for others.
 
So I am currently sitting on the floor, in my laundry Room, because I am actually comfortable for the moment SOMEHOW. . LOL don't ask. But it was the puppy's fault. :dogwalk:

I hope everyone is having a great day.:) :-) (:
Those are GREAT suggestions for the kiddos! Thank you EVERYONE!
I think I'll be doing some Amazon shopping today!


I stopped taking my Anti inflammatories yesterday and it was a killer.
I have 2 kids who attend 2 separate schools
lus after school activities so I am in-and-out of the car so many times playing mom taxi. LOVE MY JOB , But Getting out of the car is awful lol so sometimes I sit in the parking lot and play on my phone. I guess I'll be adding laundry Room floor to the list of strage places I sit for no reason.

Hipster, I think your daughter's party plan for this weekend sounds perfect! You guys can enjoy a mother daughter spa day instead, when you are up for it!!

AD... Alaska to New England ???? Omg. You.had seriously patient parents. I'd have to tie.mykids to the roof... JUST KIDDING!!!!!! Or am I ?

And how did you know my secret spaghetti Recipe lol

Anny... 4 littles??? Under 5???? At the same time??? Wow! What a challenge :)
Thank you for some WONDERFUL ideas!!!


HAPPY Taco Tuesday Everyone lol
 
Gosh @Mascaramom - stopping your meds is no fun! Can you take Tylenol at all. It might just take the edge off. I guess this is just more confirmation that getting that THR is the right move. Hang in there - eye on the prize!
 
Jaycey... it's Harder than I expected. 1 week to go!! My carpal tunnel seems to feel worse, every muscle in my body is sore, I'm assuming that's because of my limp favoring my hip? And my left leg feels like it weighs about a million pounds. Other than that I'm fine. :rotfl:
I'm calling to see if I can take Tylenol... ty for reminding me
 
Hi @Mascaramom
Ooooh do I sympathize with the getting out of the car!! Wins by a landslide as the most
painful moments of the day pre-op. For me anyway.
I used to put my hand underneath my thigh to slowly let my leg down.
If I lowered it without doing so.....excruciating!

I am still amazed when I get out of my car now "like a normal person" and realize IT DIDN'T HURT!
The first time I did it, once released to drive, I actually got emotional realizing there was no pain. I wanted to get in and out again, simply because I couldn't believe it!
Exiting the car was always my reality slap of how badly I needed the surgery.
Suffice it to say that 7 months post op there are still many "Thank You, Jesus" moments.
THR has been a blessing! Hope your day is peaceful.
 
Agree with Jaycey on the heat! I used it toward the end at night while lying in bed, watching tv, before sleep.
I felt it gave me some relief. Consider giving it a try, if you haven't already.
Hang on....this last lap can be a challenge, but you'll get there.
 
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