Sorry for my absence! I didn't realize it had been so long since I posted. Thank you for thinking about me. I appreciate it. I'm just in a bit of a funk and I guess I was inadvertently laying low. Last week was difficult because it was my anniversary and it hit me a little harder this year. This is going to sound silly, but Swede (that was Russell's nickname...) was a huge Chicago Cubs fan too. So, the fact that they are doing so well is hard because he's not here to see them. I've just been thinking about him a lot more lately, and I'm sure with the recent death of my BFF Megan, it will all come crashing down again!!! I'm doing okay today, but I need to figure out ways to get out of the house more or keep my mind occupied better. Crossword puzzles have been a good thing for me. I've also been watching shows on Netflix. I'm sleeping like ****, but I'll deal with that. I should go to my PCP and get an rx for an antidepressant, but I'm not sure I want to do that so close to surgery again. We'll see what happens.
As far as my knee, it's doing really well! I *still* have about an inch long area at the top of the incision that is being stubborn! There is the smallest open area, but it does crust over often. But, because of the way it was closed and where it is, it's puckered a bit, so it pulls and takes the scab with it! So, I try to keep it covered during the day and open at night. And I keep it dry in the shower too. It was a bit red but much better today. I'm waiting to see if the PA will order antibiotics for me, just to be safe. It turns out that PT is a bit expensive for me with the co-insurance, so I'm going once a week. I thought it would be horrible, but I actually like being able to use my knee the way it should be. It's tough, and while it's awkward, it's not that painful, which I was really surprised about. They gave me a ton of exercises to do at home and I've been doing my best to do them. I completely switched to my cane on Sunday, and it's taking some getting used to. I miss the support of my crutches, but they were becoming...well...a crutch for not moving to the cane. I'm doing a lot better, but if I do too much, I get a little wobbly. No close calls or anything either! I like being able to strengthen my knee and really seeing how much better it will get! I have my own Thera-bands and cords to use. I also just ordered a 7 pound weight to help with my extension and will most likely get some sort of balance board. I have poor balance anyway, so that would be very helpful. I do still have some discomfort with certain activities, like high-stepping, some bending, but overall, I'm usually at a 1 or 2 for pain, and I've even gotten to 0!!!! That is UNHEARD of for me. It's been over 25 years since 0 pain in that knee! It feels a bit tight, but with more strengthening and use, it will be wonderful!
There are 26 more days until I have my RTKR. Luckily, I don't have to have all of the pre-op things done like last time. I can skip the class and my PCP appointment this time around. My pre-op H&P with my OS is 11/18. I feel like it's so far away that it's never going to get here, but it will be here before I know it. I'm actually so excited about it! After I have it done, then I'll be working towards two, perfectly, well-working knees and I've never had that! One of my goals in PT is to learn to get out of my kayak normally, so I will be ready for next summer! I already have a goal to put 500 miles on it!
Other than depression, I think what I'm struggling the most with is learning how to walk like I should and learning to identify as a person who can do things, and not have to make excuses not to participate. I'm still a ways away from being completely capable, but I'm on my way. I'm not sure if that makes sense, but it is what it is. Even just little things like being able to sit on the floor, or walking with my nieces and nephew to trick or treat, or walking a trail in the park. I can't do that now, but I will be able to in several months. I'm excited about that, but I'm also a bit apprehensive. I just hope nothing else breaks down too badly in the meantime! Hips...I'm looking at you!!!
That's about it for now. I'll hopefully be better with updates. I'm hanging in there and doing pretty well.
Good night my fellow Bonesmarties!
Jen