POD #12
Things have been going fairly well. Pain had taken a bit of an uptick but was settling out and manageable. I had a stomach bug last week which was not ideal when on crutches trying to get to the loo, but it resolved.
Then Monday I had my first physio appointment. I stood strong - no aggressive treatment, I raised my concerns about my incision being high risk for dehiscence since the dissolvable stitches they used to close are already dissolved (which I discovered when I changed my dressing Friday). He heard me, he respected my boundaries and just did light exercises and measurements. Flexion - 85 Extension -8. All was well. That night, my small church group was getting together for our weekly meeting and I decided to attend. Drive the 15 minutes, had to climb about 10 steps and then sat for 2 hours before driving home. It was uplifting to see everyone and other than starting to get uncomfortable sitting for so long, it was good. Came home, went to bed.
Literally slept for about 36 hours with a few visits to the toilet and my husband brought me dinner which I ate but was barely awake for. The pain in my knee/leg was increased and I had to take pain meds when I awoke. I’d iced my knee everytime I woke up. Only this morning have I managed to remain awake for a few hours. I’ve never experience this type of fatigue before and I’m not sure if it’s because it was only my second time out of the house and just exhausted my body, or if it’s because I lost a decent amount of blood and the low Hb is contributing to this fatigue, or what else.
This morning I awoke to find my husband had placed an ice pack on my knee while I was asleep and left me a tray with breakfast foods and drinks. It was really kind and thoughtful since he isn’t always the most empathetic regarding these two knee replacements. Then I found he’d placed a book on top of my shoebox of items I’ve been carrying around (my cross stitch, a word find, my iPad). It’s one I own but still, it seems to be sending a message from him like he thinks my exhaustion is because I’m depressed and not because my body is physically exhausted. Then I got. Text from him as shown, again alluding to him thinking I’m suffering from a depressive episode.
I’m sensitive on the subject because I have a Chronic Depression with episodes of Major Depression throughout my life time. But I don’t think this is related to those diagnoses. I mean, I know some of the symptoms are reflective of how I’ve been since surgery - poor appetite, not sleeping well, not showering frequently (although I wash my face and do the PTA wash daily), not having interest in regular activities, I cannot even remember the rest. But doesn’t that describe most people who have had a knee replacement in the first two weeks? Am I disconnected that I’m assuming my fatigue and pain are related to the surgery and not a bout of depression? I feel like his attempts to allude to this are making me second guess myself and now Im feeling like I’m losing my mind on top of being in pain and recovering from surgery.
Sorry for the lengthy post - I unfortunately have no one close to which I can air my concerns so I’m grateful for this group who can empathize with some parts of my journey. Thanks for listening/reading.