Become an Insider

petrified of op and life afterwards....

Status
Not open for further replies.
stargirl, I am much older than you are (I'll be 49 in another week!), but I was still extremely upset when I found out I needed hip replacement. At the time, I thought that was "an old person's surgery", and I'm NOT old, dammit!! LOL But I am SO very glad I had it, and wish they had discovered the problem a few years earlier (it had been there for a while, just took the right doc to investigate far enough). I know you will feel an immense sense of relief after you have this out of the way! And you are probably right....you need to take care of your own body, before trying to take care of a precious, totally dependent child. I've heard of several women who had children after hip replacement, so I'm sure you'll do fine. It will happen when God thinks it's time.....in the meantime, take care of YOU!!
 
I was 42 when I had my THR and my OS was so disappointed that I said that I didn't expect to have a baby afterwards. When I had my follow-up with him at one year post-op, the first thing he asked was whether I had decided to have a baby after all. He was so sad that I said no.

My point is that my OS is really conservative. If he's that supportive of women giving birth after THR, that tells me a lot!
 
Thankyou young gma and alextthecat for your beautiful comments. Its amazing how the old internal clock kicks in and before you realise there is so much societal and internal pressure we give oursleves to have a child.
I hope to god i can fall pregnant a few months afterwards. Thankyou again xxxx
 
Bottomshollow you have the most beautiful pics i always watch out for your wonderful posts!! xxx
Thankyou ded, sissy and bellaroma xoxox Very Very nervous now, waking up at 4am in angst most mornings driving my husband insane, i am just trying to move forward to the date one day at a time..
 
[Bonesmart.org] petrified of op and life afterwards....
[Bonesmart.org] petrified of op and life afterwards....
I am truly sorry that you are suffering from such angst about your upcoming hip replacement when you should be looking forward to it. You do not want to wait for agonizing pain before you do this. And after it is done and recovery is over, you will rarely ever think about your hip. It will not feel different from your original equipment--people who say they can tell just have overactive imaginations. I can only suggest that you find things to read, music to listen to, or a special DVDs to watch that are calming and ease your mind. Keep busy, do spring cleaning now, have your house spotless, all the laundry done, the windows washed, meals prepared and frozen, whatever to keep you busy, busy, busy.

This is one of the world's most successful surgeries and you will be in the hands of people who do this all day, every day and know what they are doing. You will end up with a pain free hip that not to long down the road you will hardly every think about. You can do this----positive thinking is absolutely necessary, so just tell yourself often during the day (and night when you're awake) I CAN DO THIS, I CAN DO THIS, I CAN DO THIS!

Please take care of yourself and keep us posted. We care.
[Bonesmart.org] petrified of op and life afterwards....


 
Stargirl, do you pin your anxiety on any particular worries, or is it free-floating?

Here's a few things that woke me up in the middle of the night during the weeks before surgery. I worried about what would happen to my cats if I died, and I worried about what to take to the hospital. I worried that my friend who was taking me at 0530 would oversleep and not pick me up in time, and I worried that I would get a urinary tract infection from the Foley catheter. I worried about inconveniencing my friends and relatives post-op if I needed more help than anticipated, and I worried about having to go to a rehab place if I didn't do well enough to handle the stairs to my second floor condo. I worried that I would be very depressed about not being able to go kayaking or bike riding for at least 4 weeks.

In other words, I am a World Class Worrier. I can always find something. Now I'm worried that my new hip is doing so well, I will overdo the activity and finish off my left knee and have to have it replaced, too. Sometimes I just have to laugh at myself, because I am truly ridiculous. Free-floating anxiety is not something I experience very often, because I can always find something large or small, trivial or significant, to attach it to.

I think you are a kindred spirit, Stargirl.

So what worked for me? Well, nothing, entirely, I'm sorry to say. But it did help to make definite plans for all the anticipated disasters (none of which happened.)

Instead of dwelling on the surgery, focus instead on the days after surgery, when you'll be walking around on your new hip. Just think, in less than 4 weeks, all this will be in your past, and your recovery and new life will have begun.

You are wise to express your feelings verbally, and this is a good place to do so. There isn't one person on this forum who can't relate to one degree or another to what you're experiencing. Some of the folks who were the most anxious pre-op are the ones who are most joyful after it is all over and all is going well. And that will be you.
 
Great Post Sissy!
isn't it amazing at how we can become so conscious of our own self while trying to help others?

Stargirl, there are so many here at BS that had worries and concerns before hand that if you didn't
i don't think it would be normal!

I myself had many many tasks around the house to take care of knowing i would be laid up
for a few weeks, and i over did things and worried too much before hand. Now looking back,
i realize it, but, because we have never personally been thru something this before we don't really
know what to expect. I didn't read much of the info here until after my surgery, so you have a
great head start reading the stories of others beforehand, and can get a better idea of the recovery
and what's involved, albeit very varied from person to person.
 
Fantastic post sissy46 - thank you :)

'Free-floating anxiety is not something I experience very often, because I can always find something large or small, trivial or significant, to attach it to'.

You have just described me... now I have a new term... love it.... I can now not only claim to be eccentric, but also that I have 'free-floating anxiety'...... Love it, love it... hugs xx
 
Wise words from Sissy!!!! Hope you can take them to heart. You're going to be fine and well on your way to a better and pain-free life very soon. Pain has a way of keeping everything in your life at a high stress level. You'll be amazed at how different you feel once the arthritis pain is gone. Surgical pain is a whole different animal AND it gets better, not worse.
 
Hey stargirl .... Fellow Aussie, just read your previous posts regarding wanting to have a child...

Well guess what we have a hippie member who is about to have twins on the 31 Dec 12 by Caesarian...

We also have a second member who must be getting close..

So do not give up hope :)
 
Stargirl, How are you doing? I have been away from your post and I thought I would drop in and see how you are doing. Please try to stay into today. tomarrow will happen tomarrow. when I am really worried I write the problem on a piece of paper and them put in a jar and seal it, Then I buried it in my yard and then I walk away. In my mind I gave the problem to God or Higher Power. Know we are here and will be 24 hours, 7 days a week. So please keep us posted on how you are doing. Please take care. Tashia
 
Thankyou guys, you are truly amazing all of you xoxoxoxo. I have told my whole family about Bonesmart and how it has given me the courage to commit to surgery finally (afetr so many cancellation dates of surgery) I am so blessed to have found you all and have the opportunity to vent my fears to like people who have endured and suffered for too long much like myself.

I am tired of living a sub rate life defined by the pain i feel day to day and stuffing my face on painkillers and being bloated for it :( I just want to walk and walk wihtout pain, and from what i have read it is not an urealistic expectation..

I was so happy in as sense to know it was hopefully my last Christmas of pain and disability and tht by this time next year i would not think twice about going for a nature stroll or shopping or socialising.

I love Bottomshollows post 'Courage is being scared to death but saddling up anyway!!' this is me!

Thankyou again everybody you are such beautiful people and I wish from the bottom of my heart happiness, love and light to you all. May 2013 be a phenomenal year for each and evry one of you, granting all your innermost dreams true!!! <3
:cheers:
 
Hi Stargirl! Counting down to the 23rd? Have you got everything ready? Some good books to read, a stack of good videos, a freezer full of ice cream? You know, the important stuff...
"I just want to walk and walk without pain...." You will! and soon. And it won't be long at all before you will be taking some short nature strolls or hikes.
Just thinking about you this morning:SUNsmile:
 
Hi Guys,

just wanted to touch base, and let you know getting as settled as i can be with this decision to move forward to op on 23/1.
I only have to walk a few metres to relaise without clinging onto my husbands hand and pulling him down for dear life i usually cannot go any real distance. Boy a cane would be handy! :) , better still the operation!

I guess main fretting is just remorse about the whole baby thing, but who knew this hip would rear its ugly head so soon needing replacement, i thought i could have put it off another couple of years, but this whole limping thing is exhausting and enough of public stares already..:scary:

Younggma - wise words thankyou, they are like water washing over my soul in a time of complete angst.

alexthecat - thankyou for the encouragement xx

cnydutch - too true this forum has been my everything, like a best friend that you can confide your everything to without prejudice or judgement., and the best friend has encountered almost every experience you are fearful or rejoiceful of.

Sissy46 - thankyou for caring, i am getting a little more settled and so looking forward to reconnecting with nature and the beautiful beach around the corner from my unit. I have not walked on it in years!! :sorry: when i do take my first walk i will probably cry like a sooky buba the first time! :snork:
I am definetly strating to stockpile dvds etc..thankyou for the tips keep them coming xx

tashia & Jamie - Beautiful words and great advice thankyou.

ilovefall - wow!!! so lucky not long to go, lets just soldier through onwards and upwards and get on with enjoying the rest of this precious beautiful life we have been gifted. I am tired of my hip playing commando of my life!!.
I wish you the very best of goodluck and well wishes form the bottom of my heart, judging by our members i am sure it will be the greatest gift of your life. I love the posts where our readers report feeling ten years younger and having movement restored they could not even remember undertaking pre op!.

Poppet - <3 i think this says it all.
 
Yay, Stargirl, you sound wonderful, taking charge and getting ready. How awful it must be for you to have a beach right around the corner and not be able to walk on it---but that will soon change, as will so much in your life, for the better.

You'll still be getting public stares, though, when you're walking down the beach with a goofy grin on your face because you're euphoric about being able to put one foot in front of the other without pain.:egypdance:
 
It funny, we see this over and over again. As we get nearer to the big day lots of hippies start seeing an increase in pain and decrease (yes even more) in mobility. It's almost as if the body is confirming your decision is right! Time to get it fixed and get on with living! You will be walking on that beach soon stargirl!
 
regarding fear of the hip operation. i recently found a book online that i wish i would have had before my op on dec. 18. it's by peggy huddleston and is called "prepare for surgery: heal faster". amazon has both new and used copies. good luck with the op
 
Wow, stargirl you have inspired some of the loveliest, most thoughtful comments I have read on this forum, that's wonderful. I waited to check in with other people until after my surgery, which was a big mistake. It is so much better to get onto that operating table knowing you are prepared both practically and emotionally. Sure, getting our grabbers, constipation meds and ice cream etc. is vital but no-one (except people here) suggest we brush up our inner strength and patience for the weeks ahead. You will do just fine...put your worries in a mental balloon and send them into space...they are pesky little fleas trying to sabotage you. If you want a good book to distract you pick up Gone Girl. Its the most exciting thing I read last year.. X
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Active Antimicrobial Hydrogel

Members online

Total: 906 (members: 2, guests: 904)

Latest posts

Back
Top Bottom