Knee Infection* Knee #2 Vent

[Sara61]

Congratulations on bring a grandmother 4th - so envious, my daughter is just to career minded at the moment and at 28 she feels too young to be a mum, the rate she is going I will be too old and doddery yo enjoy a grandchild haha xx

 

[Starsfan22]

Thanks Jockette, that's so kind of you.

 

[Starsfan22]

This thread is called a vent thread for a reason, so today I'm going to vent! My husband just told me after I pointed out a container of rotting coleslaw has been on our counter waiting to go to the compost for a week, that I should take it. It would be good for me to go down a couple of stairs then trek over uneven rock and lawn for about 20 yrds, plus I'd get some sunshine that I've been unable to enjoy for almost 2 weeks because I had a TKR!

I'm very unhappy about maybe missing my granddaughter's birthday party tomorrow. It's being held at a restaurant that I may be able to maneuver a walker around successfully. After riding in a car for an hour each way to the restaurant, I know I'll have to visit the restroom, will I be able to get up off their toilet? Who knows? Do I attempt it? I hate the doubt this surgery has forced on me..

I was blessed with a new grandson this week. I was unable to be there for the birth.

After expierencing an infection discovered in Aug. I had the pleasure of two aspirations in hospital, a surgery to clean out and remove all hardware, insertion of a spacer which I hobbled around on with my walker for 8 wks. I guess I should mention the pleasurable 6 wks of IV antiobiotics which I had a nasty reaction to.

And yet I should hobble out to the compost pile because it will be good for me! I'm so glad I'm off narcotics at under two weeks from my TKR because I'm having wine tonight!!

OK, vent finished and I managed to get a little pity party in there too. I feel better, thank you! I think rather than trekking out to the compost I'll watch TV Christmas movies and try my hand at painting a poinsettia.

Do you have a vent?

 

[Sara61]

I think you would be very brave to attempt any of that just after two weeks post surgery, I for sure wouldn't maybe you can assist the birthday party by videocall instead x
Maybe your dear husband should watch the video of TKR then maybe he will be a little more gentlemanly, some men just don't get it - until it happens to them
Hope you are enjoying the well deserved wine xx

 

[hawk2go]

Vent on! I hope your husband finds some info (any info) that makes him realize that what you need is not a coach but a cheerleader.

 

[djklaugh]

@Starsfan22 A very righteous rant! You have better control than I might have if I were in your situation cuz my imagination went to up ending the rotting coleslaw on to hubby's head. Nah, I probably wouldn't do that but the mental image is quite satisfying.

I agree with Sara61 - video call the birthday party .. and a visit with your new grandson too!

 

[MARYCOOL]

@Starsfan22 ..I hope your husband knows that the shoe could be on the other foot one day!
My husband knows that he is next (bad hip), and is taking such good care of me, as I will of him.
Most women do the cooking, cleaning, shopping etc. It must be hard to take over for us!

 

[Sks1997]

@Starsfan22 we all need to vent at times! You have been through so much. I totally understand your feelings about your husband. My husband had unrealistic expectations of my recovery early on and finally realizes that it is a long and challenging recovery. He shocked me the other day by saying, “don’t worry about anyone else’s recovery, you can only do what your knee will allow and it doesn’t matter how long it takes”. I also think he thought about the many times I have saved his life from blood sugars so low that he was unconscious (he is a type 1 Diabetic).
Congrats on the new grandson! You will see him soon as well as all the other activities that you love to participate in.
HAPPY HEALING! We are here for you!

 

[DEL2022Jan-23]

You are just two weeks post surgery- when I was at that stage I didn’t leave the house and couldn’t look after myself at all regarding cooking etc etc. Your venting is perfectly justifiable and understandable. You need to protect your knee and take it slow and steady the Bonesmart way- don’t overdue things just because others expect you to or even because you want to !
Its frustrating to not be able to do things you want to right now but in a years time you will be able to chase your new grandchild as they speed crawl across the room, just give it time
I think your husband might be listening to too many people who said they were nearly running marathons after 6 weeks- it happens but judging from the number of people on here with issues during their healing journey it doesn’t happen as often as he might think. Also everyone’s path to health is different. My husband was pushy at the beginning thinking that if he pushed me I would get better faster, I “enlightened” him
We are both on the same page now regarding my recovery, he helps as much as he can and I do as much as I am able.
Hope the glass of wine hit the spot!

 

[Starsfan22]

Thanks everyone who responded and justified my rant. I'm going to try to be patient with myself, have a come to Jesus talk with the spouse and do what I can when I can where the grandkids are concerned. The wine was nice!

 

[jaspa]

How are you doing @Starsfan22 hope your

come to Jesus talk with the spouse

did some good

 

[Starsfan22]

Saw OS today, we removed stitches but still need wrap until seeping at bend area resolves. I can shower with steristrips only, very exciting. He says I'm doing very well, actually he depended on my assessment, after all this is my 3rd surgery on this knee. He ordered PT, hope they are agreeable to my way, bonesmart's way. I'm beggining to use cane rather than the walker. I've been on walker for 10 weeks due to spacer placement and now TKR. I would love to throw it out the backdoor. I will miss the basket though, handy to carry things.

 

[DEL2022Jan-23]

Have a conversation with your PT at your first appointment and explain what you want to achieve and how you would like to do it the Bonesmart way, I am sure they would be very happy to do so for you. It sounds like you are on your way and I am glad you had such a good visit with your doctor. Now that you are starting to use a cane you can also use a cross body shoulder bag if you need to carry things with you- I am not talking about being a pack horse and overloading yourself though- just lightweight things.
Don’t dump the walker yet, I found it handy to keep beside my chair when getting up, it gives you something to grab onto if you get a wobble before using the cane/crutch and it can be a handy support during exercises to.
You are doing so well!

 

[Starsfan22]

Thanks Eire 1, I'm slowly transitioning to the cane. I find the care most useful in the kitchen where I need to pivot around a lot. I'm wanting to do some Christmas cooking, hope I'm up for it. I hate that my tkr ended up being so close to Christmas, it ruins everything. Our activities are back to back 4 days straight. Hope I make it! Worrying about being capable is a psychologically draining.

 

[Sara61]

Try and get some rest time in the midst of your activities. I look at my new Knee as a Christmas gift, namely I get to rest, and waited on, no cooking, nor cleaning and by the Summer we will be able to enjoy the sunshine and all that the Summer has to offer xx

 

[DEL2022Jan-23]

@Starsfan22 Don’t worry about being capable this year-you can do only what you are able to do right now and next year you will be able to do so much more. Every time someone asks if you need help your go to answer is yes! Sit while working in the kitchen, sit to chop, sit to mix and sit to watch someone else do it! Your most important job right now is to heal and sometimes that looks strangely similar to you sitting in a chair with your leg elevated and ice applied.
My normal Christmas involves baking cakes, pies, decorating the house, cooking the dinner etc etc etc- this year I bought the food already prepared, husband decorated the house and he will cook the dinner with instructions from me from my chair. It’s not the Christmas I want but it is the Christmas I am going to have because I know my knee recovery is the most important thing right now.
Everyone knows you have had surgery, the only pressure is the pressure you put on yourself , no one is expecting you to do everything and if anyone does expect you to start running around doing stuff you can just give them the same come to Jesus talk you gave your husband( I just love that phrase)

 

[hawk2go]

the only pressure is the pressure you put on yourself

so very true

 

[Catalien45]

Omigoodness! I’m playing a little catchup, & just read your vent post. Your situation makes me think of the lady I met briefly today while getting my PICC line dressing changed. Hers sounded a similar situation. I felt So bad for her!

I had the one infection, one aspiration in the hospital & cleanout surgery, with new spacer. No fun, for sure. Today at my Infectious Diseases Dr appointment, she said they felt my infection did not appear to go deep, & are pretty sure they got it all. She also said, “ two surgeries so close, the infection, the antibiotic, of course, all these will fatigue you.” And you have been through far more than I have. Your body Must need some rest! I found this one has been more difficult, but lately am much better, a bit, day by day. I still feel weak & wobbly at times. Using cane outside, & inside, I’m OK with no aids. Once again, I think you have been through a lot more. You need to take care of yourself. ( btw, I find the walker handy to keep me stable & give support for some of my exercises.)

As to Christmas. Ours is definitely different this year. Not doing my beloved seasonal baking! For Thanksgiving, our daughter, son in law & grandson came here. She baked salmon, made dressing & sides& a pie at her home, my husband cooked brown rice, brought it here, & it was Wonderful,. Totally non traditional, but fun. Christmas will be similar. We put up a fraction of our decorations.... but it still looks like Christmas. I’ve just had to let go. But it’s fine. Looking forward to next year, too.

I’m in agreement with the Zoom idea. Our grandson (6) had a big outside event at his school, the first, shortly after my initial TKR. I wanted So badly to go! But, we all decided it could result in a setback. We didn’t go. But our daughter took some photos & sent to us. So we still got to enjoy it. Maybe someone can get you some good photos on their phones for you....
Also, we FaceTime regularly with grandson & his Mom, maybe just a short FaceTime with your grandchildren & a parent would be fun....

I do hope you are doing better as I post this. Btw, I had a fairly bad reaction to the antibiotic, pretty bad nausea, & No appetite. That has improved. More & more things taste good, very little nausea. And the I D Dr said that the oral antibiotics generally don’t have near as bad an effect. So that word of encouragement for us both!

Closing this with my best wishes & prayers for your complete recovery this time. Do take care of yourself.....

 

[Starsfan22]

I had my first meeting with PT today, it went well, she was impressed with my progress. ROM 90+ extension 0 at beggining of 3rd week. I told her exactly what I would do PT wise and what I wanted to accomplish. So far she's on board, thank goodness. I'm feeling well and sleeping well. Why I'm sleeping so well with this tkr is a mystery to me but I'm so grateful. Only pain is worse in this recovery than lack of sleep. Next week I see the infectious disease Dr., I expect he'll do a bloodtest to check infection markers. I pray all is well there. It's my turn for good news.

 

[Starsfan22]

Anyone else have dry peeling skin on the surgical knee? It's like I'm molting. 2 1/2 weeks after surgery. It happened with my spacer surgery too. There are so many strange side affects of this journey, most are just gross or a pain. Constipation, sleeplessness, pain in odd places, rashes from sitting too much, depression, fatigue etc, etc. Did I miss some?

I did several PT exercises today. Not many reps but knee got stiff immediately and needed icing, hope this gets better. I sure wish the weather was better as I'd love to do some walking.