Hello Bonesmart Peeps!!
I've been in a weird place mentally...probably mild depression, so I apologize for not keeping up with you as much as I would have liked. I am just weary of recovering!
I also feel a bit guilty feeling this way when I see so many of you all struggling with really challenging issues.
I am actually happy with having both knees done 15 weeks apart...I can move better, my legs are magically straight instead of severely knocked, I have had little segments of time with barely any pain.
Having life revolving around recovery just. seems. endless.
I have to start job hunting soon. It is frustrating seeing job postings come and go that I can't apply for quite yet.
On the good side, I am extremely grateful that because my PT continued right up to my second surgery, my disability insurance company has just determined that they will continue paying me through the second recovery, which was a total surprise, since I am no longer even paying for coverage any more. So I am double embarrassed at being bummed out having been at least temporarily spared from real financial hardship.
Upon re-reading this, I am so tempted to delete the whole whiny thing.
On the other hand, it's my post-holiday, dark January reality...
(Has anyone found a fast-forward button yet? I think that's all I need)