TKR Acceptance and Understanding<

[Needhope]

@Wilsomasan My OS basically doesn’t believe in prescribed meds other than the bare minimum. It’s been a subject of some of my past posts. Unfortunately the opioid epidemic here in USA, now has government stepping in to police this issue. I’m not a druggie, never was, don’t want to be, but because I had major surgery that is painful, I unfortunately am now an innocent patient who suffers because of others that chose to ruin their lives abusing the medications that persons like me need, but can’t get.

 

[Jockette]

When I’m stressed, normally I get up and do housework, or pace

Well this explains a lot! Kind of like my sister in law who says cleaning relaxes her.

Try to change your mindset. You know that taking it easy and resting your knee is the best thing for it. So don’t look at it as “doing nothing”. Look at it as “working hard to give your knee the best chance to heal”. And for you, it will be hard to do that, so you really will be working hard, but in a better direction than you have been.

You can do this! It’s important.

 

[sistersinhim]

Doing the job of healing your knee should be your number one job! That includes rest and icing, not working it. We will be praying that your job of not working your knees will get easier and that your knees will approve of your new job!

 

[Needhope]

There will be those that don’t understand and think I’m being lazy. For one, me. I’m my worst enemy. But I know it’s important. I’m fearing muscle loss and atrophy, that’s my worst fear. I’m expected back at work in a couple weeks unless I’m granted an additional couple weeks of short term disability through work insurance I paid for. Major stress factor for me. After speaking to my boss last Friday, I’m still employed there but their concern is I need to be able to walk throughout factory, squat, stand, use machines all unaided by cane or without lagging a leg behind. There are no sit down positions. It’s factory. I believe they also expect no restrictions imposed from my surgeon. It’s stressing me out thinking of it, it’s overwhelming to imagine this is going to be possible considering how my knee feels right now. I’ve got a huge weight on my shoulders, so sitting here makes me feel like I’m not helping my situation...... BUT....... I have to..... I know it now. I’ll try to remain positive, and not expect more of myself than I can do. So for today, I ice, tomorrow I ice. That’s my plan.

 

[Wilsomasan]

Needhope: I feel so bad for you! You are only 2 weeks out? I know what you are talking about with the opioid epidemic. It’s out of control in the US. Patients who need it should not have to suffer. Why aren’t doctors more enlightened in the US? I think that it’s driven by insurance companies - the fact that they push PT so soon and expect you back to work resuming normal activities too soon. Luckily my doctor is kinder and he listens to me. You’ve gotta stop being so hard on yourself Hon. It will only increase your suffering. I know it’s hard but you need to rest in order to heal. Kick back and be kind to yourself. Watch a series on tv. Treat yourself like you would someone you love.

 

[Needhope]

@Wilsomasan I had my LTKR April 4, I had RTKR September 22 2017. After my right was replaced, my left couldn’t handle the extra work it needed to do for me, it crumbled and basically I had no choice but to replace it within a short time after right one. Nightmare that I’m trying to push my way through. Never thought this would have to be, but it was. .......It all is, what it is..... but it doesn’t make life any easier. I’m trying though. Thank you.

 

[kayow11]

I am just putting my 2 cents in here, if it's worth anything to you.
My husband has been caring for me after 3 TKRs for almost 11 months now. I'm sure he has gotten tired of it many times, but has never made me feel bad about my condition, and just did the duties like it was his job.
I don't think this is extraordinary behavior from someone that loves you, and that you would do the same for them. He wants me well as much as I want to be healthy.
Don't feel like you are a burden to your daughter. Many adult children these days have no idea what real life is because parents have taken too good care of them, and did everything possible to make their life easier.

I am 6 weeks out, and definitely walk with a limp due to weakness, pain, and not real coordinated. When I take my 15 minute walks, I use a cane, which improves my gait, and takes pressure off my sore knee.
You still need your cane, except for walking to the bathroom, or some short distance like that. Remember your are causing more swelling, pain and inflammation when you do that. Of course this increases your misery.

I can notice TINY improvements each week, slooooooowy. In reality, several months of healing, and even more for some of us, like you and me.

And lastly regarding pain meds, on my Oxycodone bottles, my OS name has never been on any of them. It has always been a PAs name. Every time I read your posts, I get so angry with your surgeon, and the misery he is putting you through, and wielding his POWER. It's despicable!

Have you directly asked your PCP if they can help you out? They may say they don't like to, but does that mean for sure, that they refuse to help you? I would want a for sure, yes or no.

You will survive this pain, despite the suffering you are going through. Think long term for the healing process. I have struggled many times with this also. But most of the time I realize the reality of my condition, and recognize how it has been going thus far. It helps me to think more rationally.

 

[kayow11]

I forgot to add this to my last post.
I did lose my job due to my slow healing, could not meet the job requirements, needed to have a revision, etc.
fortunately, my company had availability of long term disability, which I did qualify for. Does your employer have this option?
One advantage I have in this situation, is my age, 63 years old.
I know you are a lot younger, and fear unemployment now. If you are granted more off time, that may be enough. But if you can't do your job when time is up, then you will have to make alternate plans.
Your life will not end, but will change.

I am a realist, and like to plan for many scenarios, so I am not surprised or super stressed if The unplanned and unexpected occurs. It gives me a little peace of mind.

 

[mlwreader]

After my right was replaced, my left couldn’t handle the extra work it needed to do for me, it crumbled and basically I had no choice but to replace it within a short time after right one.

@Needhope I had a similar scenario. The way it went for me was that I was scheduled for a RTKR when the left one blew up, making it impossible for me to walk without a walker. I couldn't get my first OS to agree to do them both at the same time, so I found another doctor in another city who was all for doing them both at once. I am almost 8 months out now, and neither one is completely healed, but I am able to walk on them pretty much pain free. I am struggling with patience, because I read on bonesmart several updates of people with less time than I have who are walking two miles no sweat, and I just can't do that. I get tired and spacey and feel wobbly after about 1.5 miles still. So I understand your frustration. And fear. Because a tiny little voice in my head whispers that the knees will never be ok. And I have to just take it one day at time and hope for the best. And trust that my knees will keep getting better and better. And you do too, my dear. Hang in there and breathe. Big hugs.

 

[Needhope]

@kayow11 I was told by the short term disability company that I do not have long term available. Also regarding my pcp, I saw him in Feb as was put on antidepressants and anxiety meds because of all this. He also is my moms pcp (she is very ill) and my estranged fathers pcp so the topic of conversation always ends up about them and him asking me, every single time, how they are doing. And every time, I remind him I do not see or talk to my father and haven’t since he left when I was in high school. My pcp is old and honestly, needs to retire, so we don’t really have a great physician-patient relationship. I cannot go to him for pain management medication. I’m in a pickle and I’m trying the best I can to get through without much support. I guess I’m doing something right because I’ve gotten this far through all this without.

 

[Mutti3]

If possible,suggest finding a new PCP that has no association with your family. Relationship with your PCP is vital to your health. Try to find a young PCP who will be your doctor as the years progress. That was my plan, so far it worked.

 

[Needhope]

@mlwreader I’m hanging in there! No PT for me today. Only thing that I don’t understand is being 5 weeks out from TKR is even just getting myself a cup of coffee or walking to bathroom causes my knee pain to start escalating. Therefore I sit. It really is frustrating beyond belief. I can’t do the smallest of walking about without it flaring up.

 

[SusieShoes]

Only thing that I don’t understand is being 5 weeks out from TKR is even just getting myself a cup of coffee or walking to bathroom causes my knee pain to start escalating.

Please try to remember that one reason your knee is acting up this much at 5 weeks is that you didn't give it the rest it needed at 1,2,3, and 4 weeks. You pushed it a lot and it got very aggravated. Now that aggravation needs to settle down.

Healing a TKR takes time for everyone who has this surgery, even when the knee doesn't get pushed too hard or aggravated. It takes six weeks just for the body to do the major repair work -- this is true for every major surgery, not just joints -- and then there is continued healing for many months more. There's just no rushing this.

I know it's hard for you to rest, especially when "doing" things is how you work off stress. My mother-in-law would iron whenever stressed. Aggressively. Aggressive ironing. Not being able to stand at the ironing board after a TKR would have left her beyond frustrated. It's more difficult for some people. Just hang in there!

 

[Needhope]

@SusieShoes okie dokie... will do! Hugs!

 

[kayow11]

I totally agree with changing primary care providers and you need to do this as soon as possible. It may not help with the pain medication issue now, but you need to have someone that cares for you primarily without other interference. It's hard to choose one also since you know nothing about any of them. You just have to try one out and see how it goes, and if you don't think this person is the right one for you, then switch again.

And regarding how your knee feels now, Susie shoes is so right about too much activity and not letting the new knee rest enough these first four weeks to help induce the necessary healing.
But you can start this process and be more consistent with less activity and more resting, any day. It's not too late to start.
I'd like to be super busy too and it has been extremely difficult for me to sit around so much for 11 months. Ask my husband how much I complain about that!
But it backfires every time if you don't do what your knee needs. Think of it as the new boss in town, and everything has changed from this point on. You will not win this battle, your knee will, so please listen to it.

 

[Needhope]

This comment needs no reply, I just need to vent it out. My knee keeps buckling now hahahahaha! Damned if you do, damned if you don’t! It is the boss!

 

[mlwreader]

I can’t do the smallest of walking about without it flaring up.

I agree with Susie @Needhope. Your pain now is not an indication of a surgery gone wrong. It is an indication of an angry knee. I had to remind myself of this after I moved from my old apartment to my new place in my new city at 5 1/2 months. My knees had a lot to say about that, and I had to listen to what they were telling me for several weeks after the move. I babied those girls, my new knees, plenty of icing and elevating and resting in my new apartment. Luckily I had the foresight (thanks to what I learned on bonesmart) to order a Lounge Dr. to be delivered to Denver before I moved, so I had it here at the ready when I got here. And I still use it quite a bit. But I did worry during that period, just like you, that something was drastically wrong with my surgery - that the pain and discomfort I was experiencing was a sign of something bad in the knees. And I shared about it here on bonesmart, just like you are doing, and the more experienced folks talked me down each time. I am so grateful for that.

I quoted you because I was wondering if you are using your walker? Before my surgery when my left knee blew up, and I wasn't able to put the slightest weight on that left leg because of the knee pain, I got around using my walker. I didn't go very far - just around my apartment, but it allowed me to function in my ADL's. Also I rigged it up with a carryall so I could get my coffee and food and such from the kitchen to my perch on the couch. I don't even want to look at that walker today, because it reminds me of so much pain and discomfort, but it certainly was a Godsend. It meant I could take care of myself, albeit very slowly and cautiously.

Hang in there gf. One day at a time. Give it some time and rest. Hugs.

 

[Wilsomasan]

@mlwreader what is a lounge dr?

 

[Needhope]

@mlwreader I stopped using my walker a couple weeks ago. I felt I didn’t need the extra stability anymore. I don’t know what’s going on anymore with this left evil-child knee. I’m throwing my arms up and letting it do what it wants. I can’t control how it’s going to act with just a small tootle to the kitchen or bathroom or wherever. I quit it. I hate it. Maybe someday it’ll decide it likes me. For now, I don’t like “it”, So we’re even.

 

[mlwreader]

what is a lounge dr?

@Wilsomasan It is a cushion to use to elevate your leg(s). Its sold on Amazon. The curve of the thing is the exact right support for elevating a leg after knee surgery. There is a picture of correct and incorrect elevation that some of the admins post regarding this issue. I think it is @Josephine. The one picture of the rather leggy lady reclining on the couch is one where the lounge doctor is pictured.

I stopped using my walker a couple weeks ago.

@Needhope maybe its time to get the walker out of mothballs until your knee settles down. I didn't use it for balance, I used it to keep weight off my very injured knee. Maybe stopping using your walker wasn't such a great idea, given where you are now? I'm just sayin'. Anyway, just a suggestion of something that helped me.