14 weeks out?? I think.

[danni]

So sorry nadine to hear your news, maybe its the stress of everything and it might sort itself out. Your posts were such happy bubbly posts up to now and we really enjoyed them.

 

[nadineme]

And they had every reason to be Danni.......every reason in the world. I finally had life where I wanted it.... right about now I couldn't care less. I will eventually give myself a good swift kick in the butt.......however for now......I grieve and will grieve heavily for sometime.....but I will come h e double hocky sticks or high water continue my physio routine twice a day.....even if I am drowning in my own tears.......I'm still gonna do them. I'm loosing weight like crzy here so I am a bit worried about loosing any muscle mass I may have managed to get into the new hip area up to now. But I really am having trouble eating to begin with....I am sure this is going to compound the issue.

 

[JennyAWX]

I'm so sorry Nadine. I hope this is temporary. Focus on your health for now and hopefully things will settle down soon..

 

[forbesy]

Oh Nadine

It's at times like these that you feel absolutely let down, I dearly hope you man comes to his senses.
You really are a very special person/ woman that doesn't deserve this and I am sure all the woman on here will give you lots and lots of support.
I really am gutted for you Nadine and hope you can talk about this with your man to resolve the ongoing issues.
Thoughts are with you Nadine. :console:

 

[nadineme]

There is no talking things out.....we talked this afternoon.....he explained he just doesn't love me as a wife anymore. But he is worried about me.....he is going to continue paying all the bills here until i am back at work full time....and wants to make sure i call him for anything i might need......there is no resolving of anything here I'm afraid....I'm starting over yet again......And i actualy had a thought today already that I will never meet anyone and will be alone for the rest of my life.....thats how I feel right now......I realise that will probably pass......but right now its excruciating.

 

[1jt@atime]

Nadine, I am so sorry to hear about your breakup. Please don't even begin to think that being alone is an issue. You don't need a man to define who you are. You are a wonderful person and you will get through this and you just never know what's next. We are all here for you. Please remember that! Time heals.

 

[Jamie]

Nadine, my heart aches for you. It's hard to believe this has happened. But frankly, the sooner you can make the break, it's probably better. Having him there would likely just keep tearing you apart. It is certainly to his credit that he will continue to help you until you get on your feet. And....that he didn't try to "fake it" so as not to hurt you.

But....listen to Karen. She is right!! You are one heck of a dynamo and strong as can be. You will get over this hump and you WILL be just fine - maybe even stronger for it. You know we all have your back. We're here any time!!!

Sending you hugs virtual ((((HUGS)))).....let us hear from you again soon.

 

[Renate]

:grouphug2: Nadine, so very sorry, especially now that you have overcome your 'hip' hurdles. You are a very special lady, and I hope like other people here that maybe things can be resolved.

 

[Jaycey]

Nadine I am so sorry to hear this bad news. You are one heck of a strong lady and you will survive this and move on to a better place. If your partner doesn't see this then it wasn't meant to be.

You take care of yourself Nadine! We are all here for you - anytime and any subject.

You are in my thoughts! :console:

 

[Josephine]

That's really horrible - just when you are getting to the point that you can really enjoy life with him. What a

 

[linderbelle]

I am so sorry you are going through marriage problems at a time like this. Please try to get into counseling. In a few days my hubby and I will be celebrating our 38th anniversary. We have gone through counseling 2 different times. I've been at a point where he was more like a brother than a lover-husband. One time I almost walked and a friend said to me don't your kids deserve for you to get your butt in counseling and then after a year or so if you still feel the same way to walk. Point is that when your marriage is at rock bottom you truly do not know how you feel except that you aren't happy. Any kind of relationship takes work--especially to keep it alive.

Again, I am so sorry as I can't imagine having my husband do that right now to me. My emotional roller coaster from this surgery and drugs has been something else.

Praying for ya.

 

[nadineme]

Thanks so much Linda...emotional rollercoaster has been the same here.....but my man does not want to go into counselling......says it doesnt' work./....we are adults and have both been around the block a couple times....if we can't make it work between the two of us then it wasn't meant to be and we need to accept it and move on..........those were pretty much his words. And the look in his eyes when he stopped by to pick up clothes pretty much drove the point home....he looked...like he had blocked me out completely........swears upon taking care of us untill I am back on my feet at work......but there is no love aside from loving me like famly.....thats it. But if I need absolutely anything.....I am to call him or text him....he doesn't want my daughter and I to suffer. I can't hate him...and I can't be angry at him either..I sill love him......this is going to take a fair amount of time here.

 

[L.A. Hipster]

That is horrible, Nadine. Hang in there! Since he won't go to counselling, maybe you could go yourself to get the support you need.

 

[Jaycey]

Nadine, I just want you to know that you have been in my thoughts. Won't share what I thought about your man though. :hissyfit:

I think you are right about just making the break and getting on with your own life. Do you have friends or family who can help if you need it?

Take care!

 

[Jamie]

I agree with Jaycey. The sooner you can make a complete break and move on, the better it will be for you. He knows this was an awful thing to do and I'm pretty sure that is why he is so insistent about helping you until you get back to work and all --- guilt.

Your last post pretty much said it all....he has moved on already. The fact that he could be at that point so soon makes me think a lot less of him. Obviously this has been in HIS mind for a long time. Frankly, he's not worthy of you!! Life has much in store for you and that shiny new hip. I think once you get back to work and around people again, things will look a lot different to you.

((((HUGS)))) to you....hang in there!

 

[Lindawalms]

Nadine,

Just wanted to let you know that I too am thinking of you during this unbearable time...I'm so sorry this is happening to you and I 2nd many of the other posts on here - YOU are too good for HIM!!!

I can't imagine how difficult this is for you but I am praying for you - from what I know of you on this forum - you have the strength and personality to get through this and at some point be better off...I know this may not seem possible at this moment but I have a feeling you will b better than ok - you don't' deserve to be w/ a man like this and you are better off w/out him - in time I pray you come to accept this.

Please know I am thinking of you and praying for you - please keep posting about how you are doing and feeling - I think its key for you to rely on friends at this point in time

xoxoxo,
Linda

 

[pamela280465]

am sending you lots of love and hugs agree with what everyone else has said, but maybe with time he will realise what he has thrown away and will agree to talk, who knows how mens brains work??????? But am sure you will get through this xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

 

[sharonann]

Oh Nadine, I'm so so sorry to hear your news. It's come at such a bad time for you.
Please don't let it affect your recovery too much, you owe it to yourself & your daughter to get back on track as soon as possible.
Once you're back at work & amongst company again, you'll start to gather your thoughts together & accept the situation.
I know it's hard but try & look on it as a new beginning, you'll probably find an inner strength that you weren't aware of - yes, there's going to be bad days but life does go on & the sun will shine again.

Of course you still love him - you can't just turn your feelings on & off like a tap, but love yourself more!!! :flowerysmile:

Don't forget you have the support of everyone here so rant & rave as much as your like!

 

[Josephine]

And the look in his eyes when he stopped by to pick up clothes pretty much drove the point home....he looked...like he had blocked me out completely........swears upon taking care of us untill I am back on my feet at work......but there is no love aside from loving me like famly.....thats it. But if I need absolutely anything.....I am to call him or text him....he doesn't want my daughter and I to suffer. I can't hate him...and I can't be angry at him either..I sill love him......this is going to take a fair amount of time here.

Huh! He wants it all nice and sweet, doesn't he? Doesn't want a scene when he dumps you for some bit of fluff he's picked up. Good grief, girl - you get good and angry - tell him he can't have his cake and eat it!

I had a friend, a nurse who suddenly took the flat above me years ago. When we got to know each other, she told me how her husband had done almost the same thing to her except their two kids were teenagers and at uni. He seemed to be 'so reasonable' she felt she had to be the same and politely packed up and moved out of their beautiful Tudor thatched house in its own grounds and got herself a job! I was speechless as she told me. She claimed no maintenance, just let him have the house, the kids and everything. It wasn't till I told her she could have stayed and made him move out and pay her keep, she began to see what she had done. But then she found he had moved his bit of fluff into her home - that's when she finally got angry and stopped feeling like last week's laundry!

 

[nadineme]

I am planning on going. I have an appt already. Counselling. The only prob is that it takes so long to get in. I had the same problem when my mom ended up in ICU last year....I just couldn't deal with it. Took three weeks to get in....now I have an appt for the 15th of this month. Like helloooooo.....by then I will be well on my way...but I will still go.....its been a very long very eventfull yaer....and I am do to go back to work on sept 1st as well just to add to the pile a bit. Our couselling or therapy sessions are covered by where I work....EAP (employee assistance plan)......its great. I never have any trouble goin to talk to someone. None at all...friends are great.....but its nice to hear from someone else that the things going through your are legitimate and your not crzy....

That is horrible, Nadine. Hang in there! Since he won't go to counselling, maybe you could go yourself to get the support you need.