TKR Winner winner, chicken dinner! Bionic Liz's new RTKA

[Spex10]

Ooh a self inflicted MU no A!

 

[newlybionic]

Remember, don't fight through the pain to do anything including stairs. If it starts to hurt or you have more pain or swelling afterwards just stop doing it for a few days or so and then try again. This recovery is not a linear progression but more like a roller coaster with ups, downs and curves. We all get to the end at some point but it usually seems to be longer than we expected or been told.

 

[Mireille]

@L.I.T hey girl, wondering how you're holding up. I've been slacking on the posting.

 

[L.I.T]

@newlybionic, I definitely will heed your advice - so far the only 'steps' I have even attempted are a set of 5 mini-steps (3in high) that lead to our guest rooms - I still have enough fat pad swelling and banding that I don't have the heart to try anything crazy!

So here's my question - instead of listing all the 'issues' I still have and knowing the RICE and time are the answers, I'm going to try to tackle this insecurity from another angle.

What did you do to convince yourself that you were not going to be stuck like this (7 weeks) forever?

Mostly, I saw significant improvement in the first 4 weeks - but since then, aside from the RIP event a couple of nights ago, I seem to be stagnant. I'm still attached to an ice machine every waking opportunity, due to the internal swelling.... And still doing a fairly good job of resting. But no long walks, as even just having my knee bent on the floor for 20 minutes this morning (fixing my computer) caused my knee to swell again.

So how did you convince yourself that it's going to be fine and that you needn't worry?

I WILL be going to an alanon meeting tonight, regardless of my condition. I desperately need to be reminded that I am not in control and that I am where I should be in my life.

Thank you guys for all the support and help!

L

 

[Mireille]

@L.I.T oh Liz, I know exactly how you feel. I don't know the answer because I'm asking that myself. It is so much easier to give comforting words and reassurance to others than to ourselves. As I'm writing this, I'm wanting to remind you of other TKR journeys on this forum of people who felt the same way we did and they got through it. How hypocritical of me when I still doubt my own recovery! I do however recognize that it does make me feel better to hear it from someone else so I'm going to tell you anyway. This will pass and you will be in much better shape than when you started this journey. I sincerely hope we stay in touch so that we can reminisce and laugh about how silly we were! Lots of hugs going your way!

 

[L.I.T]

@Mireille,

YES! I can't wait for that day when we get to say "how silly were we!?!?" Where is Michael J Fox and his DeLorean when you need them??

 

[L.I.T]

Well, at least I can say I have a contortionist for company today.....

 

[Mireille]

Adorable! My doggie does that too. I tell her she's just making fun of my stiffness!

 

[newlybionic]

All three of my dogs are now on my lap. They range from 6 to 14 lbs. it's a good thing it's an oversized recliner!

To answer you question concerning how you convince yourself things will get better I pose this to you. Would this surgery be one of the most done surgeries around the world if you wouldn't wind up much better after surgery than before? Just remember you are only 7 out of 52 weeks into recovery. Granted you will feel much better before a full year but just keep that in mind. You won't notice changes day by day any more. You will progress without thinking about it. A few months ago as I was walking in a parking lot of a grocery store and it start to rain. I found myself running to my car. I haven't been able to run in years but there I was running!

 

[L.I.T]

@Mireille Ha ha! If it were my other BIG cat, I might actually feel the same way! Thank goodness for our animals!

@newlybionic, you must have one *seriously* oversized chair! Do your dogs use you as a highway? Since I've been home from the hospital icing and elevating, my two 20lb cats have found that my chest is a very convenient route to the window sill.... I'm surprised I don't have permanent cat paw imprints!

OK - 7 out of 52 weeks. I know that in my head, but seeing it in print makes a HUGE difference. Also you mentioning that we will progress without even knowing it. It makes me think of 'watching the grass grow', 'waiting for a pot of water to boil', and 'watching paint dry'. I can me tally grab on to that.

What I need to do is find some new activities to keep my mind off of it all. Since I still swell so easily, activities are not my solution. I need to figure a hobby I can do while icing. I shall work on that and try to just let my knee boil, dry, or grow

Thank you @Mireille for your green light, and thank you @newlybionic for giving me different perspective on which to chew.

Off to Alanon!

 

[newlybionic]

My daughter when she was in college took up coloring in a coloring book. There are apps you can get if you use a tablet. We have a Community tab on the top that you can go to. There are simple games you can play with others. Another favorite was watching Netflix. I saw so many good series. A good one for today's political scene is House of Cards. Some do knitting or crocheting but that would only drive me crazy.

 

[Mireille]

@newlybionic thanks, that is a great perspective! This knee consumes my every waking moment, med to find another focus

 

[BARBRI]

I do a lot of crossword puzzles.

 

[Spex10]

I think that's the problem. We get obsessed with our knees and the various routines around them. I've improved a lot since my wonderful physio said to stop thinking about it and 'doing' exercises. Get out there and live your life she said.
At my desk I sometimes look down at my knee and wonder when it started to bend so far back. I just hadn't noticed because I was so busy doing something else.

 

[Cratchit]

I think when you`re in pain or discomfort and life is restricted and smaller because of it, it`s very hard not to focus and think about your knee a lot. It`s only when time passes that you realise you`ve thought about it less and less - but then, hopefully, you have less issues, too. You`re a good few weeks behind Spex and I @L.I.T and @Mireille so hang on to the knowledge that you already have that it does get better, in time.

I only think about my knee/leg and ongoing issues for about 99% of the time that I`m awake now. That 1% of time when I am distracted is usually when I am eating! So maybe it`s more like 50 - 75%, not 1 . . .

 

[KarriB]

It will get better. During my infection which came a month after surgery and meant another surgery, no bending, wearing an imbolizer brace, IV antibiotics, oral antibiotics, no white cells due to all the antibiotics, I couldn't focus on anything BUT my knee. However, a month after the 2nd surgery the brace came off, a few weeks later I was driving and went back to work 2 months after that second surgery. At the time the hours move slowly, but in the end you'll look back and know this made you a stronger person, not just a stronger knee. Perseverance develops character and this recovery requires perseverance.

 

[L.I.T]

To: BARBRI, KarriB, Spex10, Cratchit, Celle, Mireille, and newlybionic

I MUST thank you all profusely for keeping my spirits from falling into the dumpster. I honestly don't know what I would do without you all!

Shiver me timbers, but the ortho gods must have gotten tired of my belly-achin', as they gave me a wee peek of some normalcy yesterday! I woke to an only slightly swollen leg, and as I crossed the parking lot to go to PT, I noticed I wasn't struggling to move my leg at a snails pace! Granted, I certainly wasn't Mario Andretti walking, but my limp and knee were not so obvious that everyone had to stop and wait for me. After PT, I even went grocery shopping for 30 minutes without thinking of how much I was going to pay for it later. And the BIG kicker.... First night after PT that I did not need to take a pain pill! Woo hoo!

Now for the bittersweet part. My physical therapist told me to take a couple of weeks off and just do normal walking and let my soft tissues calm down (I'm having some incessant popliteal tendon popping).... He then told me that my OS would be thrilled with my progress, and that next time my PT sees me, he's discharging me.

I think I may be the only person on these boards who is actually sad to be released from PT! They have been my third family (after my hubby and you guys), and I'm going to miss all the laughs, whines, and education that happened during my time at PT.

But progress is good, and apparently he believes there is nothing more he can really help me with... That it is all up to father time now.

The irony is not lost on me that he thinks I am doing well, as well as thinks the OS will be 'thrilled' with my progress - and yet, here I have been feeling like I'm stagnant and not getting anywhere. I think part of it is that b/c of my hyper flexibility, I came out of the gates with a good ROM... So really it was the swelling and pain that I had to improve - and those are harder to tackle.

But after everyone's comments the other day, and being released from PT (along with a moment of progress from the ortho gods), I feel a bit of a renewed hope. Although the ortho gods apparently try just wanted to give me a 'peek', as my knee is nice and swollen again today!

Still, I want to thank all of you for your comments and suggestions. I'm going to focus on some other activities (coloring, crosswords, maybe planting some seedlings in containers) to keep my mind off this dratted alien that has held my focus for nearly two months.

Of course, I can't promise I won't come back and whine again.... But I will genuinely try to have a better attitude!

Thank you, again!

 

[Mireille]

@L.I.T Woo hoo, that's fantastic! It's a 2 way street around here, you also give us motivation and encouragement. I think we tend to be harder on ourselves!

Super happy and excited for you!

 

[RMasano]

@L.I.T Great news all around!!!! Congrats!!!! Please don't leave us!!!!

 

[Spex10]

That's brilliant. More or less exactly the same as me. I'm enjoying going out and about but am definitely slow and sometimes stiff but that's OK