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New Here today 6/21/16 - afraid to have surgery

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Hi @CaliGal,
Oh goodness it's absolutely normal to feel that way. I'm a nurse based in the UK and understand the ins and outs of how everything works but it didn't help in any way at all. Trust everyone involved in the process and ask as many questions as you need. They do this every day of their working lives, it's what they do best. Sometimes though patient communication isn't the greatest because of this so make sure you get all the info.
I got to the stage with my osteoarthritis that 'normal' life was one where I couldn't do the simplest of things. Oh how I longed to be able to walk a reasonable amount without the pain that followed. Once the decision was made I put my trust in the experts. I did my research about preparing the house for what to expect, post op mobility etc. That helped me feel more in control. The day of my surgery was ok, not as bad as I expected. Tell the hospital staff you are very nervous, they will help if they know. I had a fabulous consultant who came to see me pre op. He just breezed in and said right Jacqui are you ready, let's do this together :)
The next thing I'm awake and it's all done.
It's now almost two weeks later and while yes there are up and downs and frustrating moments I am looking forward so much to the future. I woke this morning and just burst into tears. Was I sad? No!!! I have none of my old pain you see, it's amazing and emotional at the same time. Yes there is the surgical pain, but thats managed well with pain relief and one day I will wake up and that will be gone too.
I bet over the years you have been strong for lots of other people. Now is the time to be strong for you. You can do this, no one knows the strength inside us until we have to call on it. It won't let you down :) xxx


Right THR
10th June 2016

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@CaliGal Welcome to BoneSmart! Love your screen name BTW. I am a former California gal now living in the UK.
CaliGal said:
my biggest fear for a long time was not waking up.
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Worry not! The anaesthetist will be watching like a hawk throughout the entire procedure. They will monitor you very closely. If you have a spinal and sedation you will be awake as they roll you into the recovery area. I have had both general anaesthetic and a spinal and from my experience the spinal is SO much easier to recover from. You are awake and hungry within a few minutes.

Be sure and discuss all your concerns with your surgeon and the anaesthetist. Staff totally understand your anxiety and they will do everything they can to keep you comfortable.
 
@CaliGal, so, no where near where we will be. :( I really want to go to San Deigo, but maybe next time. The things I want to do there require a lot of time on my feet, so getting this hip taken care of first is a good idea.

@Sommers16 your post was so beautful. You are so eloquent. Thank you!
 
@Happy girl and @Jaycey thanks for your posts....it helps to hear all sides of what this surgery is all about, I appreciate you taking the time to care thanks so much!!!!!!! What house prep did you do Happygal? Jaycee what part of CA where you from?
 
It's not as bad as you imagine, @CaliGal and absolutely worth it. Feel free to ask any questions and if I can help I will!
 
Hi @CaliGal
The best thing you can do is inform yourself. Read as much as you can on this site, it will really help you.
I am 2 weeks post op and am thrilled with my results. My leg is straight, I see improvement every day, I'm healing up nicely.
I live on my own and the only support I have had is a ride to and from hospital. I prepared my place so that I stay on the main floor and moved things around so that I don't have to bend too much. Some things I consider essential.... reacher sticks(4), gel ice packs (4), easy to prepare foods, fruit, juice and fiber rich foods, lip balm, body/hand wipes, pain relief rub/cream, incontinence pads (I tend to leak before getting to the loo), pillows and a good sense of humour.:egypdance:The second day I was home, I dropped an entire tube of toothpicks on the floor!:gaah:

Best wishes in your journey xo
 
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HI @CaliGal!
I visited and researched extensively five surgeons in the SoCal area and hands down I loved Dr. Steven Barnett (he teaches other surgeons the anterior method). His office is in Orange County and he operates out of HOAG Orthopedic institute in Irvine (one of the best rated joint replacement institutes in the country and all private rooms). The only reason I didn't use him is because I live two hours away from HOAG and I thought the drive home post-op would be too far. HOAG is especially good for nervous patients because their program really educates you on every aspect of this journey. Hope this helps.
 
Hello, @CaliGal ! And welcome! You sure have come to the right place for both information and support.

As you have seen, you are so not alone in feeling fearful! I don't know anyone who has had surgery who hasn't. Even that fear of not waking up! But you know, with my first hip replacement, it had reached a point of such pain and debilitation, I almost didn't care, lol!

And of course, for informed consent we do have to be told all of the risks, and that can scare you away. Just remember with this surgery, those risk are *so* low! And becoming more so all of the time.

What I hear more than anything else is " I wish I had done it sooner!"

Surgery is not fun. It is messy, painful, and intimidating if you have never done it before. But I will tell you what. Those first steps I took post op? One of the most wonderful feelings of my life! There was NO joint pain. NONE! There was surgical pain, and yes, it really hurt, but it was nothing compared to that bone on bone day in day out pain. My kids told me I was walking better the first day post op than I was before surgery!

I cope by researching, gaining knowledge, being proactive where I can. I had to limit learning about the actual surgical procedure because like you, it icked me out, lol! But I focused on getting the house ready, trying to get optimal nutrition, doing the pre op exercises faithfully. I found a meditation tape for preparing for surgery that helped immensely. That was me, you may find things that suit you better.

My first THR was in 2010, and other side in 2012. Both times, it felt like I got my life back, and I have *never* taken that for granted since!

Here is a saying I heard, can't attribute it. "It is okay to be afraid. But sometimes you have to be afraid and do it anyway."
 
Hi @CaliGal, I was terrified before my surgery. I cried hysterically when I watched the video. (Well, I couldn't watch it, but I listened.) I went to Dr. Matta in Santa Monica, and everything was excellent. I felt safe and secure with him. I had a GA, and I just went to sleep, and woke up in recovery. I didn't feel a thing. Things really couldn't have gone better.

I can understand why the pamphlet scared you. My friend told her surgeon that she trusted him, and that she didn't want to know what he was doing. It made her squeamish. She only had stiffness after her surgery, no pain. (and she couldn't take the hard medications, just Tylenol!)

I'm sure you'll do really well. It helps to tell them how frightened you are. I did a lot of yoga breathing, and had lots of friends saying prayers for me. We will be rooting for you, too. You can do it!
 
Hi, and welcome, from one Cali gal to another! Yes, this is no doubt a scary journey we're embarking on for those of us who've never had surgery - much less one of this magnitude! I've probably oversaturated my mind by reading everything I could find online on THR; even watched the surgery on YouTube! (I don't receommend that for those of us who are extremely nervous! I finished watching it, and then had to ask myself "WHY DO YOU DO THIS TO YOURSELF?"!!!! Hahaha!) My OS office just called me a few minutes ago to confirm that I was still wanting to stay on the surgery schedule (evidently it must be quite common for people to change their minds!) - I said "Yes" while the scared part of me inside was thinking, "Really? You're managing the pain even though you can't do anything anymore...." :sad:

I've been finding immeasurable comfort in reading the encouragement and reassurances in this forum (just read the post on here from @dinsmaum, and again, my mind was put at ease...) - I'm just sorry I found it so late in the game! (Just joined this past Saturday, and my surgery is 3 1/2 weeks away.) It's so wonderful to know there are so many people who've gone through exactly what we're going through, and can report to us from "the other side" of the operating room that all will be well!

(Thanks for the reassurances regarding the anesthesia, @Jaycey!) Not only am I afraid of not waking up, like @CaliGal, but I have an even bigger fear that I'll wake up in the midst of surgery and be unable to tell them I feel it!! :scare: I'm having a spinal with sedation, and have had my appt with the anesthesiologist, who was quite kind in listening to me go on and on about my fears - I'm sure they must hear it all the time! :)

Do you have a surgery date yet, @CaliGal?
 
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@DizzyBlond and @CaliGal
I did wake up during surgery and just like others on here who had awakened, it didn't bother me at all! In fact, I thought, "Oh yeah, that construction noise must be my surgery going on". So, I mouthed, "I can hear you" and the next thing I knew I was in recovery. If you should awaken, it won't scare you at all (pre-op you couldn't have convinced me of that for a million dollars)!
 
Oh yes! I want to second what @Hip Hip Hooray! and others have said: If you are nervous, if you are scared, tell them! I found that even the busy residents were more than willing to work with me, and the nurses were great!
 
@DizzyBlond and @CaliGal
I was assured that if I woke up during surgery I would not be stressed out.
True to word, I woke up twice...once to the hammering and my arms must have moved because I remember the anesthisist saying "no assisting the surgeons" and gently pulling my hands close to my body, the second time was hearing the staple gun going off and my OS instructing the resident surgeon on how to do it, I told them to "do a good job".
I was not upset by this at all, the sedation keeps you very calm. I woke up fresh in recovery chuckling at my memories in the OR.
 
@Cynthia777 ~ NO!!!! You woke up during the surgery, simply noted that all those carpentry sounds, and calmly let them know you could hear them????? You're right, Cynthia - what you couldn't believe pre-op I'm having a hard time believing too! :heehee: I hope to be able to say the same thing one month from now!

@dinsmaum ~ I'll be taking your advice, to be sure! I told the anesthesiologist at my pre-op meeting (not necessarily the one I'll have for surgery) how scared I was. He was so kind, said he made note of my concerns, and mentioned I'd have the opportunity to have more conversation with whichever anesthesiologist is on duty the morning of my surgery. I'll be telling them all, "I'm SO SCARED!!!" :rolleyes:

@msmo ~ Oh, my goodness - I'm laughing just thinking about you being told to not assist the surgeons! I'm so glad to hear all of you say that once I'm in that OR, they'll have me nice and relaxed, and perhaps even ready to add my two cents whenever I might wake up in the middle of it all! :)
 
I actually thought there was construction work going on nearby, until I remembered reading about other members who woke up during surgery. It was very surreal and I was so calm about it! It was no big deal! I still shake my head in disbelief (that it was no biggie) whenever I think about it.
 
I'm so happy you're now on the "other side," @BizzyLizzy! I hope you're doing well and that all things are going smoothly as you now are a "graduate" of the pre-op forum! :-)
Looks like I'd better be prepared to wake up during surgery! (So happy to read that it's not a big deal!)
 
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