Become an Insider

TKR gr82cu2 Hello new knee, it's great to see you!

Thanks everyone! I did end up going to PT and then cried while I was there. Ugh! Not from the pain or anything but from feeling discouraged and frustrated. I was fine until she (not my usual PT who is on vacation this week) told me I'm doing great. I just don't see it personally. I'm not saying I'm doing poorly and I don't have complications thank God, but I just feel like I've waited so long to feel better and I want that now!!!! This didn't begin on July 29th when I had the surgery. It's been going on for years just like it has for all of us here. I guess at this point I just can't get past feeling like I traded one set of pains and limitations for another. Yes, I know this pain and limitation will improve and the other wouldn't but gosh darnit, enough is enough. I'm ready to move on. I was so hoping for a good month or 6 weeks before I do my other knee and now I don't feel like that is going to happen. Then it's back to the drawing board. The first month post op the differences day to day were palpable. I could feel them and see them. This past month not so much. I feel stuck where I'm at and not improving for the past 4 weeks or so. I could probably even be satisfied with where I'm at with my ROM if it weren't for the stiffness and soreness setting in whenever I try to get up and do something. And we're not talking about extraordinary things, just day to day living things. Showering, cooking a meal, housework, all those kinds of things. I don't know, I've just been an emotional wreck the past 2 or 3 days. I'm sure it will pass. It has to. Honestly, I don't know what I would do without all of you and your encouraging support. I feel like no one else in my life quite understands how I'm feeling right now.
 
The changes come slower and slower by comparison with earlier weeks.
At ten weeks post tkr I have flashes of normalcy which are treasured.
We of course have no choice but to hang in there.

But it is worth it. With the improvement in function of my right knee, there is less stress on my left knee, and I feel now that I may be able to postpone this for a substantial time. Only had three ops on that knee! I may be able to make it without a tkr on at knee at all.

Normalcy is my goal. I can see light both during this journey, and at the end of the tunnel.
Hang in there, and celebrate your small wins. They are actually bigger wins than you think.
This morning I raised my tkr leg and dried my foot with a towel after a shower, and didnt grimace. That may seem like a small win, but you will appreciate how more human it makes you feel.


Sent from my iPad using BoneSmart Forum
 
@Reebok I sure was hoping my right knee would feel better and my OS even said it may but alas, it does not and has not. Actually the past couple of weeks it has been acting up more. It's not constant pain but more of sudden jolts of pain when I move just right. Stops me right in my tracks sometimes. That's exactly what my left knee did. As much as I would love to put off the 2nd TKR I just want it all over with. My husband keeps telling me to not worry about the cost of it (it will save us over $6k to do it this year) but the way I see it, if this is a year long recovery, at least I'll be dealing with both at the same time and looking at maybe a total of 15 months recovery time vs. 12 months and then another 12 months at some future time. May as well get it over with. I'm so happy to hear you've had some glimpses of normalcy lately.
 
@gr82cu2 I am sorry you are not where you would like to be. I am sure thinking about starting over with the next knee adds to those feelings. I certainly agree with wanting to feel better. You have been through a lot and want to feel the gratification and it will happen. Sending positive thoughts your way.
 
Thanks @Minnie's knees ! I appreciate it. It will get better, I know that. This has just been a particularly blue week for some reason. It gets ya down after awhile. I'll be ok. Please don't let it discourage you. We're all different.
 
@gr82cu2 It won't discourage me. Reading about the ups and downs of others is preparing me for what to expect. If I am super lucky great..if not I am prepared. I know you will be okay. I just hate that it's getting to you this week. Wishing you lots of good results and smiles :loveshwr:
 
Hello Janet @gr82cu2

I have seen you on other posts, but only got to your personal post this morning to read how you are getting on.
You sound tired, frustrated and weary.

But, underneath that I see a strength that is in you to push through as you prepare for your November RTKR.

No one can understand the journey pre and post TKR and while family and friends hopefully are there for support, but unless they have 'been there and got the TKR tee-shirt' it is hard for them to fully understand.

@Reebok is wise to remind all of us to celebrate the small accomplishments, they may not be "news worthy" to the world, but make a difference to each of us.

This is for me the longest and most tiring physically and mentally post- op I have ever experienced and each hour seems to have a different aspect good moments, then less good moments.

Trying to stay optimistic is hard and I have to almost will myself to stay positive in the dark hours of nighttime pain and discomfort.
Or when after PT, I feel that I didn't accomplish anything or that my progress is at a stand still.

But, what does get me through and for those of us here is the support found on Bone Smart.

Take care and for all of us let there be better days ahead.

Cathie
 
@tealeaves My record has turned into more of a whine I'm afraid. I'm glad I may be of some help to you in some way. I see you are going to have both of your knees done also. Will you do both at the same time or one by one like I am? Before I had this done and even in the beginning I thought no way would I ever do both at the same time. But, my thinking on that is changing as time goes on. I'm sure the challenges in the beginning must be harder to overcome with both knees in the game at the same time but one recovery seems very appealing to me now. Too late for me, I guess. When will you have your date(s)?

@marmora Hi there! I know you know these frustrations. Maybe the post op blues are just now hitting? I'm ready to feel better as I know you are. Both physically and emotionally. I have a cousin who had a knee replaced 5 or 6 years ago and I've emailed with her. She says she only remembers being swollen for about a week!! She did have a scar tissue problem that had to be broken up and then she says she has been fine since and is glad she did it. I guess I just want to be glad I did this and not be scared for the next one. It almost seems like she's forgotten or something and can't provide any details now. Wouldn't that be nice? I keep telling myself everything should be good by next spring but that seems so far away now.

Anyway, I need to cheer up. We're having family pictures taken later this afternoon. Can't go into that with a sad face :)
 
@gr82cu2 I know it's hard to believe but you are pretty early out and so it's not surprising that thinking about doing a 2nd knee feels daunting. My guess is by the time you hit the date for your second one you'll be feeling more positive. I'm on the verge of 4 months and I'm just starting to feel closer to normal. Or should I say better than the old normal. :)
 
@gr82cu2 my brain fog has temporarily lifted today so I'm catching up on posts. Pardon me while I add my comments from your last week!

Kids: I got married at 27 (not b/c I wanted it that way- I kept dating guys who thought marriage was a wonderful institution but they didn't want to be institutionalized (an actual quote from one!) It took five years plus fertility drugs to have our first son at 32, then a son at 34 and a daughter at 37 (no help with the last two). We were "old" parents and hubby was in the military (enlisted), so we transferred to stations and never were able to build up a "nest egg" in a home of our own. Our kids have never been to Disney ( most of our "vacations" involved transferring to a new station or obligatory visits to relatives) and we just made it to the Grand Canyon two years ago as part of a family reunion. I don't think our kids are spoiled or deprived- they've had a lot of attention from us but don't have a travelogue. Hubby retired seven years ago and we'll have a mortgage well past the normal retirement age (hopefully all my joints will cooperate and I can work and help pay it off). Not sure why I felt the need to ramble- I don't think there's a bonus to having kids old/ young- life's journey just kind of dictates how and where our path winds.

DIY- my hubby is a great guy and handyman, but not very detail oriented ( I feel your pain with the painting). I do all dry walling and painting projects in the house. I rehabbed my hip enough to finish the drywalling projects in several rooms before my BTKR. Then, right before my surgery, we discovered a slab leak. This past Friday, all the hot water lines ( it was a hot water line leak) had to be rerouted through the attic (it was either that or dig up the floors and repair and possibly face another one in the future). The plumbers were great, but guess what? They routed down from the attic and had to cut through drywall. Now I have more drywalling projects. I wanted to cry- I probably did, just can't remember it right now. The repairs were about $3000, which is astronomical for us since I haven't worked since March, so our house will stay in a state of disrepair til by body is all better. I'm trying to remember that "this, too, shall pass" but some days it's HARD! For now, do what you can, and if the neighbors complain, maybe they'll have a painting party at your house?

I've had the mental ups and downs in the past few weeks. The first week was "I am crazy for doing this", then, I'm glad I had bilateral- mine were both so bad I can't imagine trying to rehab on the other bad knee- I don't think it would have helped. If you figure out any comfy sleeping positions, please share. I'm still in my recliner ( tricked out with an egg crate mattress cut to shape, then covered in a sheet) and lots of pillows and blankets. I try the bed every few days and last a few minutes. I pretty much live in my recliner in various poses and take regular walks around the house. I haven't found any other chairs I like and it's more comfy with my legs elevated on the recliner.

Thanks (or apologies) for letting me ramble on your thread. I watched one of this Convos videos and it brought back memories...I wonder what the videos will be like when she's a teen? :heehee: I hope you have a pleasant afternoon!
 
Hi @PuppyLove Ramble away, anytime! Sorry about your plumbing issue. When it rains it pours. Yep, Kent is a great guy but details are not his thing and he is not handy, at all! He tries bless his heart but tools are just not his thing either. We took today off from the painting project because of the family pictures. I told him I didn't want to get all hot and sweaty and tired and grumpy and then go do the pictures. Tomorrow we calk :) Whoohoo! All the scraping and priming is done. At least the parts we're trying to do this fall. Hopefully next spring I'll be back on my feet and feeling good and we can get after some other places. I vividly remember painting this entire house by myself, even the siding up high on the eves before we got vinyl. I could go all day and not be bothered. I miss that woman!

Our little picture outing today was 5 hours in total. By the time we drove (45 minutes) to where we needed to be, were there 90 minutes, went out to eat with everyone, drove Kent's folks home and then 45 minutes back here my leg was screaming :sos: Not to mention all the cleaning up, hair doing and makeuping I had to do to get ready. Hopefully the photographer got some good ones. Kent's mom and dad are 85 and 83 and not in the greatest health so it was important to get some nice pictures with them and them with the kids and all.

I'm right back here in the recliner, leg up and iced for the night. I tried that one night in bed and that was enough for me. I was sick of the couch so I've settled into the recliner. I woke up once last night and was so comfy I considered never going back to bed, LOL. Thank goodness we got new recliners with last year's tax return so they are still nice and cushy :)

Have a great night everyone!
 
@gr82cu2 At first I thought about doing both knees at the same time, but have been advised that with my hands/arms disability that I would do better having a leg up, even if it was a damaged one, to get me through the recovery. So, I will be doing one knee at a time. I'm hoping that I can get the first done by the end of October and the other done by January or February so that I will have a few months to get the second one healing good, before summer. I've missed enough.

The pain of the surgery is in my thoughts, but then I also look at the family members (dad/aunt) who have had this done and especially my 87 year old MIL who had one of her knees done when she was 86 and I feel like a wimp. I went to a specialist (at the urging of my os) because the x-rays are not matching the amount of pain I am in and he advised that I had 3 options. - Be in pain, stay drugged up enough that I don't care that I am pain, or have the tkr's -- which he said out of the three, he would pick the tkr's. It's funny in that the specialist said that what I had always thought of as my 'better' knee is actually the worse one.

I have an appointment in mid week with my os to go over the specialists visit. I am hoping this will nudge him enough to get this moving and give me surgery dates. I don't know if he will go as far as set up both dates without seeing how the first is healing, but I'm going to try to convince him so at least I have it on the calendar, even if I have to move it further out for some unforeseen reason. It will certainly give me an incentive to work toward after getting the first done.

Anyhow, enough of high jacking your thread. I am sure I will also be doing more than my share of 'whining' once this gets moving. Heck, I whine about the missing out of life and the pain now when I reach my tolerance level after some really bad days in a row. One of the things about BoneSmart is that we can get things off of our chests and no one thinks any lesser about us for doing it. I really like that you are posting what you feel as well as your progress and not hiding the reality of it all. If we only read the 'miracle' recoveries, we'd be in major panics if we went off those timelines.
Here's to better days ahead.... :cheers: :friends: :flwrysmile:
 
Hello Janet @gr82cu2

The book of the ups and downs of TKR will never make the best seller list.
But, most of us know the story and hopefully, we will all have a happy ending.

Your family photos will become a treasured memory.

I have a recliner and have never even sat in it since coming home from rehab.

I was in the hospital for 7 days and then in a rehab centre for 14 days, so after 21 nights of sleeping in a bed adapting to my bed at home wasn't a problem for me.

Although, I am sleeping in my son' old bedroom, with the waking up at night, turning on the light to go out to the toilet, re-icing the knee, tossing and turning to get comfortable in bed, sometimes insomnia, it wasn't fair on
my husband. He is still working and I felt that it would be unfair to disturb his sleep.

Take it easy and rest today,
Cathie
 
Second the thoughts from cathie.

I havent moved rooms though, been with the wife for almost 40 yrs, not sleeping apart yet. But definitely know what it is like to be awake in the wee hrs.




Sent from my iPad using BoneSmart Forum
 
@gr82cu2 I agree with @tealeaves about posting what you feel. The personal experience and a place to share both ups and downs is a great part of bonesmart. Glad you were able to have the family pictures done. Hopefully the icing helped. Please don't over do it today.
 
So glad you were able to get the photos done. I knew car travel wouldn't be fun, but after your story I really dread it. Sounds like you need a day of total relaxation. Rest well!
 
@tealeaves I started the campaign with my OS to do the 2nd one before the 1st was even done! LOL!! He wouldn't schedule it of course. When I went for my 2 week checkup with his PA I again expressed my strong desire to do the 2nd so he got the ball rolling and got me penciled in on the schedule and at my 6 week check with my OS he approved to go ahead. So, here we are. I'll be going in again 5 weeks from tomorrow. My main concern at this point is standing up from a seated position in a chair or from the potty. Hopefully my left knee will be able to take the burden by then.

@marmora We could each write a chapter for that book and self publish :)

@Reebok Kent and I have been married 37 years and have never slept in separate beds except at times like this or when he had to travel for work.

@Minnie's knees It is still more sore and more stiff this morning from yesterday's activities. Hopefully it will work itself out through the day today. I'm always (even before the op) more stiff in the mornings.

@PuppyLove You'll just want to keep your car trips very brief for now if you can. I don't think it was the car rides yesterday so much as all of it put together. It all just added up but is temporary I'm sure. We still have a life to live.
 
@gr82cu2 Had company so didn't get on Bonesmart much just my alerts, so trying to catch up with everyone throughout today. You aren't that far ahead of hubby on your knee. He still gets stiffness (especially if he sits to long or walks around too much) , it still swells once in awhile (but not much), he still only has a small amount of the energy he use to have, he still gets pain in the quad muscle and one of the tendons beside the knee hurts sometimes, but he knows it will get better! His first knee still has some pain (usually not over a 2), but it is so much better than it was pre-surgery. He can walk without his knees giving out on him and that is how he knows he will be a lot better than before surgery. He never expected the surgery to leave him pain free, he just wanted to be able to walk without fear of falling and with less pain that before. He couldn't drive without a lot of pain before surgery and now when he drives (for about a week now) he doesn't have pain. You will get better too, I know you are tired of hearing it, but be patient it will get better.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Active Antimicrobial Hydrogel
Corganics CBD

Staff online

Members online

Total: 740 (members: 1, guests: 739)

Latest posts

Back
Top Bottom