Depression/post-op blues - open for all

[Layla]

I’m sorry you’re struggling. This has to be disruptive to sleep, which is important as you’re healing.

I’d also recommend calling your OS. So many meds list anxiety as a possible side effect also difficult or labored breathing. Most seem to do well with these meds short term, but obviously not everyone. It may be a single med, or the combination of what you’re taking. Also, shortness of breath can make one anxious, causing it to feel as though one symptom is contributing to another. Please let us know what you hear.
Best of luck!

 

[highdesertlife]

I am 11 weeks post left hip replacement. Still pain when walking. Due to have right hip replacement this Oct 20, 2020. Am concerned because I still have pain when walking. Some of my pain is due to the right hip. Worried that I will not be able to walk because of the additional pain. What is normal? When will the pain resolve? Does it take up to a year?

 

[Jaycey]

@highdesertlife Welcome to BoneSmart! At only 11 weeks out what you are feeling is normal. It can take up to one year for a full recovery from THR. And I am sure that right hip is adding to your pain levels as you are not walking properly trying to stay off that side.

Since this thread is for depression and post op blues why don't you start your own thread in the hip recovery forum. We can then give you some guidelines to help you get through this recovery and the next.

Here's a tutorial on Starting a new thread and posting.

 

[lyn12]

God bless AII of you for talking about your postsurgical emotions, especially depression. I had the Girdlestone procedure so I will NEVER or get better. Pre-disposed toward depression (genetic), my reactions 3 months after surgery is just getting worse. This is not living.The life I lived is gone. I don't know that I want to go on living. I cant do anything I loved - weight training, swim, even play pool. We used to go out to our islands and camp. These trips always bring me and my husband closer now that's gone.
Because of my 20+surgeries, the crutches have given me rotator cuff pain on top of everything else. Boredom and cabin fever getting worse. I don't see any future for myself. Living in this horrible wheelchair is awful and I can't see using it forever. If I hear "oh you'll get better or be patient, take it one day at a time" one more time, I'm going to punch somebody out.
I'd love to hear from anyone who shares my feelings. I have good friends and a great husband but unless you have been through something like this, they really can't understand.

By the way hair loss is usually caused by general anesthesia. I also learned that general anesthesia promotes dementia, especiallyin people over 65! I'm a biologist so I can understand medical terms in any journal article. When I learned about the dementia, I wrote all my doctors why they didn't tell me this BEFORE the surgery - I was furious. My favorite surgeon called and said he's now advising epidurals or spinals rather than general. My brain MRI already shows some atrophy and my memory has worsened.

Let me hear from any of you in the same boat!

 

[Mojo333]

had the Girdlestone procedure so I will NEVER or get bette

I refuse to believe this

 

[dapplega]

@lyn12 - Really sorry to hear you are struggling. I won't tell you the things you don't want to hear, but I will tell you that depression can certainly make it seem like things won't get better. I went through a bout of depression for the first, and hopefully only time (fingers crossed) after my hip surgery. I ended up getting some help and it made all the difference. You say you are familiar with depression so I assume you have a counselor or trusted Dr. to confide in and who can help. If not, I encourage you to seek that path.
Wishing you peace and positivity for the future.

 

[Layla]

Your words are heartbreaking to read. I sense your despair and wish you felt more hopeful.
I understand you’re dealing with more than Post Op Blues, but I’m sure that in part your depression can be attributed to your recent major surgery and the physical adjustments you’re trying to implement.

While weight training, swimming and playing pool may no longer be possible, rather than wanting to give up, how about researching what you can do to make life feel fulfilling once again. While physical activity may look different than before, there is the possibility that what you achieve can be equally as satisfying, possibly even more than you’d imagine.

While the majority of us can’t fully relate, as you’ve mentioned, it would seem commiserating with someone who does have a better understanding would only dampen your spirits more. I’d hate to see you risk that right now.

Rather than let negativity take over in regard to any increased risk of dementia due to exposure to GA, how about researching how to ward off dementia through a healthy diet, exercising your mind, quitting smoking (only if it’s an issue) drinking less alcohol (only if it pertains) researching supplements that promote healthy cognition and ward off signs of dementia. Sadly, you can’t undo the past, so the best option is to research preventative measures.

I do agree with the member above who sought help with a bout of depression he suffered, that enlisting temporary help through counseling, and anti-depressants if necessary, could serve as a bridge to get you back to a healthier frame of mind and brighter outlook in regard to your future. Please consider that option if you haven’t already. Hang onto hope for a brighter tomorrow and know that we’re here anytime you need us.

Sending love, a hug, prayers for your peace of mind and healing.
@lyn12

 

[Carolinagirl54]

I think I'm going thru it now. I'm at about 9.5 weeks and recovery has been slow, partially due to infection and 2nd surgery, plus a UTI and ear infection. Appears since immunity is low everything has popped out! Hubby is now back to work long hours, and due to Covid and my lower immune system, no one is visiting. I try to call people as much as possible. I need to force myself to go out, but I have no energy since surgery..how can showering wipe me out so? I am still on Doxy due to the infection, maybe that is also zapping me.

 

[Jaycey]

@Carolinagirl54 Your body is fighting quite a bit now. Healing along with the infections - that's a big burden. Rest as much as you can. Yes, the medication can also make you tired.

Here in the UK we are in lockdown again. Dealing with this virus certainly isn't enhancing anyone's mood.

Hang in there - better days are coming!

 

[lyn12]

I live in a small town with no support groups, As you said, it is so hard to get out (on my hateful walker.)
Friends do call but i just don't feel like talking. what interesting things have i to say - 'hey it takes an hour to take a shower?' Getting to find a
place that makes those built up shoes (left leg way shorter than right). I pray this works - it might enable me walk one day with crutch or cane.

I SO appreciate all the kind words you have all sent me. So glad I'm not alone!

 

[Layla]

Friends do call but i just don't feel like talking. what interesting things have i to say - 'hey it takes an hour to take a shower?'

Please try to engage with others, such as your friends, your husband, extended family etc. You may have to push yourself initially, but after a pleasant conversation with a beloved friend or family member, you may find you feel a little better. Reach out to friends via the phone, video chats, emails or even texts. Isolating yourself will only lead to loneliness and add to any anxiety or depression you’re dealing with.

If the small town you reside in doesn’t have any support groups, consider the next largest town nearby and seek options there. I’m sure you could find a clinical therapist, psychologist, licensed professional counselor within driving range. Through their resources they could point you in the right direction. Another option...a local church, or pastor, may be able to guide you also.

Contact your Primary Care Physician to see if there are any telehealth options available for you, or check healthline.com and look under Mental Health for resources.

I hope you have a peaceful end to the week and contemplate taking the steps necessary to work toward a brighter future.

 

[ncarlson]

From the article on "Post Op Blues"
"Post op blues is feeling depressed, weepy, nervy, shaky, fearful of the future, anxious, overwhelmed by what is happening to you, convinced it's never going to get any better and finally, uttering that most intense of all cries "I wish I never had this done!"

And here I am, day 5 after RTHR. Crying. I don't know why. And saying the exact thing in the quote. Why did I do this! I could have lived with the pain, and so what that there were some things I couldn't do anymore. There was a lot I could still do. Some days I didn't even have pain if I just took things easy.

I am always so afraid of making mistakes, I've made enough in 62 years. Everybody today says THR surgery is "no big deal! it's all so good!" They just send you right out the door in 4 hours, you don't even stay in the hospital anymore.

At least I'm glad to know this part is "normal". This post Op Blues. This is a very sad thread of the forum. So many are so much worse off. Makes me wish even more I had never done this.

 

[Mojo333]

Oh @ncarlson
So sorry you are in the duldrums right now.
The first weeks are indeed rough as this is a major surgery ...but please don't think that this was not a good and necessary thing you did.
I felt the same way... And I doubled up with BTHR.
Told my OS on follow up at day ten, that I guessed he sets the first pre-op appointment for 10 days out because that's how long it took me too quit hating him.
Please let us know if you need help starting a post op recovery thread.
That way we can leave you some recovery guidelines. Lots of great folks with great advice who have been through the same and Really did come out grateful....
Stay on schedule with your meds, stay icing and elevating, and keep the faith.
All Temporary.

 

[Ric A]

From the article on "Post Op Blues"
"Post op blues is feeling depressed, weepy, nervy, shaky, fearful of the future, anxious, overwhelmed by what is happening to you, convinced it's never going to get any better and finally, uttering that most intense of all cries "I wish I never had this done!"

And here I am, day 5 after RTHR. Crying. I don't know why. And saying the exact thing in the quote. Why did I do this! I could have lived with the pain, and so what that there were some things I couldn't do anymore. There was a lot I could still do. Some days I didn't even have pain if I just took things easy.

I am always so afraid of making mistakes, I've made enough in 62 years. Everybody today says THR surgery is "no big deal! it's all so good!" They just send you right out the door in 4 hours, you don't even stay in the hospital anymore.

At least I'm glad to know this part is "normal". This post Op Blues. This is a very sad thread of the forum. So many are so much worse off. Makes me wish even more I had never done this.

THR is a big deal. And a big op. But things do get better. Often it can be 4 weeks before the benefits start too appear.

You did the right thing. Just keep going.

 

[Debru4]

@lyn12 It's so hard to feel hopeful when you get into that very dark place that depression takes you to. I think you have taken a very big, very important step by speaking your truth here on this thread.Your willingness to reach out to others and verbalize your despair, sadness, and huge sense of loss Is a brave thing to do.

I had a couple of very bad days right after my hip replacement surgery--I was having horrendous reactions to my medications. My pain felt enhanced, my mind felt out of control, and I was so nauseous that all I could think about was what a terrible mistake I had made. I kept repeating to myself and to my caregiver that I felt ripped off---that had I known it would be so awful, I would never have done it. My mind, at that time, was stuck in that loop. While I had nowhere near the rough situation you find yourself in, I was really worried about myself. For me, the medications had a huge impact. I'm wondering if you have talked to your doctor to see if a shift in your medications might be an option? I think for each of us our triggers are unique, and that's where following up with a professional might help you figure out how to best understand and manage yours.

There have been so many positive, caring suggestions made in the comments above. I hope that each day finds you a little (or a lot) lighter in spirit, and a bit more able to move into the next chapter of your life.

 

[Magsmom]

Thx for raising this - even though the post is old, I only joined the hip recovery grp today.
I’ve had 8 orthopedic surgeries in the last 2.5 years. Every single time I go into a total “funk” about 2 weeks post-op. Really bump along the bottom, catastrophizing everything and thinking I will never get better, go to the gym again, be fun to be with. Rationally and logically, I know things will improve but I FEEL like they won’t.
I’ve always blamed it on the anesthesia but I think that’s just part of the larger picture. Surgery is a really big deal - Your body is thrown into chaos and recovering is hard! It helps a lot to know you’re not alone….

 

[Jaycey]

@Magsmom this thread is old but the subject remains. Post op blues is real! But the good news is all this will pass and you will get to a better place soon. Hang in there!

 

[Twilight71]

I've also been suffering from severe depression even though I had my first post op all fine appointment my surgeon was impressed with my recovery so I didn't understand why I felt this way,this post makes it clearer to see why,hopefully it will pass

 

[Jaycey]

@Twilight71 Indeed the post op blues will pass. Be good to yourself. This recovery can be overwhelming at times. But you will get to a better place very soon!

 

[Hopefulhopalong]

Thank you for this thread, I thought I was losing it. At week seven today and I feel like I might be coming out the other side, but wow, this op was way worse than I anticipated. I don’t think the info pack from the hospital prepares you well at all. At week four I just sat and cried....not like me at all...I’m living alone as my husband died suddenly two years ago, I’m still dealing with legal cases about that, and going through this op made me miss him even more than usual. At three weeks a horrible allergic reaction appeared round the incision. Itches like crazy...surgeon said to take piriton....after four days my whole thigh was bright red and inflamed, my gp gave antibiotics which helped. For two weeks I was terrified the joint was infected and it would need more surgery. It made me feel weak, vulnerable, desperate. My mood was very low and I had no motivation to do anything....even talking to friends was wearing me out. But...at week 7 I am feeling better, the infection has gone, my skin is nearly back to normal, I am a bit more mobile. I still have some issues but they are not seeming so scary. I had a bit of a blue day yesterday but a short walk in the sun to a local woodland area made me feel much brighter. Cabin fever is real! So thanks for letting me know that post op blues are normal, and I’m here to reassure anyone that, yes, they do pass....just keep going x