What is the first week like?

[TC15]

It is really going to be hard for me to just worry about me. I have always been the caregiver. My husband works long 12 hour days at a very physically demanding job. It will make me feel bad to watch him do all the things I usually do around the house, it's just me and him, so we will have to get through this. I am trying to get food in the freezer since he doesn't cook.

 

[Angel1978]

My husband has same kind demanding job. And I could not let him do it all. But he did it cause he loves me. It was hard to watch him work,cook,clean, and attend to me. But I believe it olny brought us closer. Know we butted heads. But we both learned to work good with one another. Don't over do it. Know that there will be a way made out of no way. You all will get through it. And you will see that it's not so bad letting some one help you...

Xxx happy healing.


FaithMitchmommy
PKR December.1,2014
TKREV MARCH.2,2015

 

[KarriB]

My best friend has has cancer and knee issues for over 20 years. I was always there to help with her children so her husband could handle the drs and medical issues. Last year our positions were reversed, she was visiting me, bringing me meals, cleaning my house, etc. I learned how hard and long recovery time can be and now don't expect as much from her after hospital stays. It was hard, but I had to learn how to be a patient and ask for help. We are better friends because of it.
Believe me when I say, you won't be able to do much the first few weeks. So you are preparing ahead of time, which is good.

 

[Celle]

I know it's hard to let go, but do try not to feel guilty about it. It may help if you look at it like this - time invested in resting and recuperating after your surgery is really an investment in a healthier you, who will be more able to do helpful things later.

You don't have children at home, but much of what is in this thread could be helpful for you:
Nurturing mother: how to let go and accept help

It's a great idea to cook and freeze meals in advance. Also, be prepared to have a few more takeaway meals and even frozen TV dinners. Anything like that, which makes it easier for both you and hubby after your surgery, will be a big help.

I guess you both made a promise to care for each other "in sickness and in health", or similar words. If your roles were reversed and your husband was having the surgery, I'm sure you'd be glad to look after him. Now it will be his turn to care for you. Talk to him before your surgery and see if you can make some plans together, to make life easier for you both during the first few weeks of your recovery.

 

[skigirl]

I found that the first week was a blur to me. Pain meds made me tired---and let's face it, I had just had major surgery---of course i was tired!! LOL Most of the time, I lay in bed with my leg propped up on three pillows. I also did not have an ice machine and did quite well with four cold packs that I rotated often.

 

[referee54]

I found that the first week was a blur to me. Pain meds made me tired--

Pretty much the same for me---the pain meds knocked me out and I really could not think of anybody else or anything---I really could not think much at all.

 

[referee54]

Believe me when I say, you won't be able to do much the first few weeks. So you are preparing ahead of time, which is good.

Yes, taking care of thing prior to the surgery/recovery will be a big help!

I know it's hard to let go, but do try not to feel guilty about it.

Excellent point here---it is only temporary, and you are not at all being selfish---you are being realistic and taking care of yourself---which is a must.

 

[Kansas Teacher]

Yep, this is a time when it is perfectly acceptable to be a bit selfish -- as a matter of fact, it's advised!

Roxie