TKR From Difficult Moment to Some Positive Moments

[Jamie]

Re: Having a difficult moment

Karen, I merged your latest thread with your first recovery one. We like to keep all of your updates, questions and concerns in one spot so we can go back and see where you've been as you progress through recovery.

Hon.....you MUST realize that you have had major surgery. It is way, way too soon to be trying to get out and about socially or even to run a short errand. You will get the result you have experienced.

Fortunately, you can make things better. Rest, ice and elevate non-stop for a few days. Dave's suggestions are excellent also to get that fluid moving out of your body.

It does sound like you may be undermedicating yourself. What are you taking and how often?

 

[tashia]

Re: Having a difficult moment

What I did for cabin fever was to watch tv that did traveling shows. I started keeping a diary on places I wanted to visit. Then looked into the internet on the places. Then I was feeling better I would just go the door and stand outside and just take a couple of steps outside. Even the backyard. Now I live in a apartment and would go to the mailbox and sit in the patio and have some tea knowing that time was not important. Healing takes time and try not to hurry it. I comes when the body is ready. Depression and cabin fever is part of recovery so accept it the best you can. I know its not great but it is what it is. Having friends over is also great. Please remember we are here all the time so you are not alone. I found also reading stories gave me so much hope and streagth (spelling) sorry. I hope you know what I mean. Do take care and stay safe. :doggieshmooze:Tashia

 

[Dhare63]

Re: Having a difficult moment

Hang in there, we all know how tough it is. Come here, vent, let it out. The empathy and compassion will help you through. I hit several very low spots in my recovery and had unrealistic expectations for returning to a "normal" routine. Remember that this is a process, which means there are steps you can't skip, and that it just takes time.

I feel for you and hope that the cabin fever will pass. AS suggested, start slowly adding activity, then add more as you feel the knee can handle it. If you can get on a stationary bike soon, try that. It is good for helping with swelling, just take it very easy.

Here's hoping for better days ahead!

Best,

Dawn

 

[Onestepatatime]

Re: Having a difficult moment

Thank you all so much for your replies and words of encouragement so far. I am so so so glad I found this board!!! It is discouraging at almost a month a simple thing like having dinner at a friends house caused swelling and pain that kept me up half the night. Another friend wants to get me out of the house later and go for a quick dinner, and I think I have to say no, for now. Maybe next week I will try again.

I also wrote a touch base email to my boss letting her know that 6 week return is not happening. She was hopeful I would be back around then, and I had to explain again, that the recovery for a total knee replacement will be more like 8 weeks plus. I am feeling insecure about that, and hope nothing is in jepoardy on that end. May be my own insecurities kicking in from feeling so isolated.

It is just hard to keep asking others for help, everyone has their own busy lives. I live alone with my 14 year old, and while he is good, I am just so used to doing all the cooking, driving, etc. His Dad is terrific and helps out a lot, we have a great divorced relationship and are close friends. But still....

Ok, off to do some quads, and ice.
Thanks again!!!!

Hugs,
Karen

 

[speccybecky]

Re: Having a difficult moment

Today I am 10 weeks and still not ready for work! No longer in a hurry.....

 

[kneeper]

Re: Having a difficult moment

Yes, it is frustrating that what seems like a simple outing is just too much at this stage. But remember it's just the process. Listen to the knee. It will tell you when you're ready for more and sheer willpower won't do it.

Do you have some friends who could just pop in and visit with you and would understand if you told them you were only up to short visits?

I'm quite a homebody but even I got cabin fever. I think the thing that helped me fight it early on was that I had some friends who would stop in and bring me a dinner or just stay to visit for about 15 minutes to a half hour. Also my sister came out to help me with stuff every weekend for a while so I got some socializing in that way.

 

[Onestepatatime]

Re: Having a difficult moment

Hello,
I do have some friends that live close and they visit every few days or as needed. People helped a lot the first two weeks, then everyone gets busy with their own lives. A lot of people have commented to me and ask if it is normal at this late stage in the process if it is normal to be so limited still and not be able to do errands, be out, etc. I find it frustrating to explain to people that it is still early on, and it sometimes makes me feel like people think I am not trying or whatever. I definitely need to dismiss those feelings or comments like that.

My mom is in Florida, my brother is caught up in his own home life issues, and I feel like ripping my hair out. The occasional pity party starts setting in that I live alone and don't have a mate to help. But I need to shake that off, those feelings of despair do not help at all. Maybe another two weeks will be a breakthrough.

You are only a few years older than me, what do you do for work?

 

[davrunner]

Re: Having a difficult moment

Karen,
I see from your location that you are in NJ, what exit?:th_heehee:
When your son is home have him help set you up a spot outside where you can sit and put your leg up. You can elevate and ice under an umbrella when it's nice, it may help with some of the down feeling and isolation.
With the work you do can you do some of it via tele-work? I was able to begin some work at home before I went back full time. It helped me as well as my empolyer, when I got tired I'd send them an email letting them know I had to rest awhile. It worked out well.

 

[viver45]

Re: Having a difficult moment

Karen,

Hugs to you! I know what you mean. I officially haven't been out in a public place since I left the hospital on March 22, 2012. I miss all the social part of work (but not ready for the work part yet), being out with people and just exchanging a casual Hi when walking by.

I'll admit I'm lucky that my husband has been home with me but is going back to work on Thursday. He is a fireman and works 24 and off 48. It will be a long 24 hours. My stepkids all live in town, but busy with their own lifes.

I'm anxious to get back to my "normal" life, but know it is going to be some time still - just keep thinking about how your life is going to be!

 

[Onestepatatime]

Re: Having a difficult moment

Hey DavRunner and Viver45!,
I am up in Northern Bergen County, where you at DavRunner? I actually sent an email to my boss to call me tomorrow, letting her know I wanted to talk through what work I can do remote to help out the team in my absence. See what she has to say. I live in a townhouse and have a tiny deck so when it warms up again I will sit outside. I also walk outside 2x a day briefly.

Viver45, that is good your husband has been around. But I am sure you will be fine in his absence. You can chat with all of us here too. Usually when I am bored home I cook and cook and cook. And go to the gym. Those two things aint happening right now. I might have to check out Angry Birds, lol.

Thanks,
Karen

 

[davrunner]

Re: Having a difficult moment

I live in Memphis, Tn, except for a few weeks of cold we really didn't have a winter. It appears we are getting an early summer as the temps are in the 80's already.
Hope your boss works with you on doing some tele-work. It really helped me get through some days. I just made sure my boss knew I was at the mercy of my knee and would get back to the office when I could. Tele-work helped out the office and me.

 

[jerseychick]

Re: Having a difficult moment

Karen we are neighbors. I live in Northwestern Morris County, but I grew up in Bergen County. I hope you are doing better today. I know it is hard, but try to be patient and enjoy the time off recovering.

 

[Ditzzeechick]

Re: Having a difficult moment

Karen-

I'm in south jersey, transplanted from Ft. Lee/Mahwah. I'm going into week 7 with a bilateral and would find it difficult to return to work right now if I were employed. My knees were shot and I ended up quitting my job and moving my surgery forward a month. This surgery requires a tough recovery period. I hope you're out on FMLA and have an understanding boss. I think it's up to the doc to release you to go back to work. Maybe you can direct her to this site and she'll derive a better understanding of what you're going thru with this recovery. Best of Luck!

Exit 74 :biggrin:

 

[PhoenixS]

Re: Having a difficult moment

Hi and welcome;
We all have all the stuff you are describing.
I have been out of the public eye (on medical leave) since June, 2011.
I know a bit about cabin fever!!!
I had my Revision on Feb 29th so I'm a bit ahead of you.
You MUST rest because your stamina took a huge hit with this surgery, however, like you, I am sick of my house!!
Those beautiful 80 degree days here in the northeast US went by and I didn't step outside unless I was going to a Dr. appt. It is tough. Your head wants to go out, run errands, and generally get on with life, yet your body will not allow it.
Here, in this recovery, patience is nescessary, but it is in short supply!!!
I'm going through a rough patch the last few days as well. We all hit these blockades and are forced to find our way around them, only to veer off course yet again.
The bottom line is you have to look way ahead into the future to see your prize.
Best to you

 

[referee54]

Re: Having a difficult moment

The occasional pity party starts setting in that I live alone and don't have a mate to help. But I need to shake that off, those feelings of despair do not help at all

When I was in the hospital recovering from a BTKR, my wife was at work at another hospital and would visit me at night. When I got home, my wife had to keep going to work, so my mom would come over for a few hours and then leave around lunch time. I was by myself for the rest of the day until around 4:30 or 5:00 PM.

Much of the stuff could be pre-prepared, so I just stayed on the recliner and watched TV, dozed or slept soundly, and did gentle exercises. About week two or three upon my return to home I began to develop cabin fever and some minor depression---I couldn't wait to get out of the house.

The pain meds help with the pain, but they mess with you psychologically. I was lonely---I think that the lack of spontaneity was also an issue. Even when I did get out for a little while, it took quite some effort and it wiped me out.

It does challenge one's patience---you, like the vast majority of us, have to reach deep down inside and find the patience that you need---it lies within you.

 

[RestAssured]

Re: Three Weeks Post Recovery - I had NO idea that....

Thanks for the posts and words of encouragement!

Bev asked how this happened to me at a young age.....MY MOTHER, lol. She had both her knees done 10 years ago. Doctor said it is hereditary, thanks mom! I had gone on this big exercise and diet thing a year ago. Started doing spin like 4 days a week, body sculpt, etc. My knee started to hurt, and I thought I tore something. It got worse and worse, and one day I stepped off the curb leaving work, and I couldt walk. The pain was through the roof and I ended up in the ER. Got MRI done, and the doctor said to me..."this can't be right...you have advanced arthritis and I cannot even do arthroscopic surgery". I walked out wondering what was going on. I got two more opinions and all said the same thing. Eventually I could not even work out and simple things like food shopping became very painful. I figured, I should bite the bullet and do it now, while I was secure in my job and before the summer.
Like I said, I had no real idea how bad recovery was going to be.

Heredity, hmmm, check:wink1:, Exercise only mine was track and field from high school and college, plus basketball, check. 45 years of age, check. Gained weight, check, New knees when you get well, priceless!

 

[Dhare63]

Re: Having a difficult moment

HI Karen,

I had my ACL repaired in 1997. I was home for 6 weeks and could not drive during much of that time. It was awful, as my bedroom was up stairs and had to rely on my hubby and mother-in-law for assistance. THey were great, but it was still so isolating. One day I had a breakdown and called a dear friend. She took the day off work, came over with a box of chocolates and laid in bed with me watching movies for the entire afternoon. That renewed my spirit and helped me get over the hump. I sent her an email after my TKR asking if she would like to come the 350 miles to spend the afternoon and I would provide the chocolates!

THis time around, same issues, felt very out of touch. The first week home, I had a lot of nausea from the pain meds. My hubby had to work and my son couldn't stick around. One of my friends came to my rescue, brought me chicken noodle soup and crackers. I was so sick I couldn't even get out of bed. Her son, who is like an adopted son to me, came along as well. They were so kind and that little act of kindness helped me through a tough time.

Eventually you will get there. Have faith and use the small things to propel you forward. Its easier said than done, we all know that.

Keep us posted and be well!

Dawn

 

[Onestepatatime]

Re: Having a difficult moment

Good morning everyone,
Thanks again for the support, it really helps. I am pretty sure I am having a bad reaction to the Vidodin just prescribed to me. Insomnia, restlessness, sweating, and bad mood swings/crying then happy, that are just not me. Placed a call into the doctors office, see what they suggest. Past two nights I was up until 2 in the morning, feeling all speedy. That aint the experience I am looking for, lol. At week four, the only real times I need pain killers is towards the end of the day, bed time, and when I go to pt.

I feel like at this point I should not have all this swelling, and it is affecting my range of motion. Just feels discouraging, but this is not like weight loss and fitness where the harder I try the better it gets. Hence all the frustration!!!!

As always, look forward to more input and sharing!!!!

Hugs,
Karen

 

[Ditzzeechick]

Re: Having a difficult moment

I had a horrible day this past Sunday but yesterday was great, today, kinda off kilter. One of the things I think may be causing some of my depression are my pain meds. My GP put me back on Dilaudid and I think it's too much. I feel tired all the time. I asked them today to place me back on the hydrocodone/acetaminophin 7.25/325. This gave me relief and some minor sleepiness but I was able to function. Check your meds, I'm certain that mine impacted my mood levels. Good luck!

 

[Onestepatatime]

Re: Having a difficult moment

Hi Bev,
Was it the pain and swelling that caused you such a bad Sunday? I left a message for the doctor's office. I want to get off the hydrocodone, but I am not a pill expert. I read tramadol with tylenol could be effective.

My new task is to find recipes that require 5 minutes prep and cook in one pot, so I can be drop more self sufficient in cooking and not eat take out or pre-made frozen foods.