Revision TKR Sondrals’ Revision

[sondrals]

Thank you @Jockette, I’m trying not to let my anxiety get the best of me but feeling really down especially given the person I live with thinks I’ll never get better.

 

[Jockette]

Thank you @Jockette, I’m trying not to let my anxiety get the best of me but feeling really down especially given the person I live with thinks I’ll never get better.

It’s totally understandable to be anxious and depressed in the circumstances you are in. The after affects of surgery increase these feelings. We here at Bonesmart are here for you.

 

[sistersinhim]

It's hard to not have the support and encouragement of those we love in this recovery. The thing is, they have not had this surgery and have no idea of what you are going through, both physically and mentally. We do. We have been there and are here for you. Come on here every time you need us. In your struggles, you can also help those that are coming up behind you or having a worse time than you. This site has been a Godsend for thousands and thousands through the years. I spent many hours on Bonesmart during my recovery because I had no one else who understood.

 

[sondrals]

Yeah, he doesn’t know what it’s like and honestly everything has fallen to him which while not fair, there isn’t a way around. I try not to nag him too much about “little” things. I’m a neat freak and clean house 2-3 times a week. The house has been swept and vacuumed exactly once since I had surgery. It drives me nuts but the world will not end if it doesn’t get done. So we’re both having to learn a little bit.

I’m pretty miserable today, joys of being on blood thinners and child bearing age I guess. It also might explain my anxiety and mood the last few days as well. I found an app that does relaxation stuff and is supposed to help you sleep and it did. Then my friend texted me at 2am! So I used it again to go back to sleep and it worked again so I may use that more often. We also went back to bed after my 6 am meds and both of us slept until 9. So pretty big deal except now my dang hip hurts.

My August knee feels bleh today, swollen and kinda poppy/clunky again. I used only the cane a good part of yesterday and today and I assume that’s why. So icing and stuff today but still trying to use the cane. Still can’t figure it out left handed I am not that talented I guess.

 

[Celle]

My boyfriend said he’s just going to start preparing the house for wheelchair access because I’m not ever going to be able to trust my new knees we paid so much for. So whatever wind I had in my sails is now gone and I just want to lay in bed and cry. I don’t know why I feel like I can’t trust them but I am terrified of falling

I think your boyfriend needs to read some of the articles here on BoneSmart. He obviously wasn't prepared for your knees to take the time they need, to recover.

Try not to be upset with him. He's speaking out of ignorance and fear for you. But, if you both give your knees the time they need, everything is going to work out all right in the end.

To be honest, I think that both of you went into this unprepared for the time that recovery takes. Now you both need a dose of reality - and the application of some common sense.
Your left knee isn't yet 5 months old - that is only 5/12 of the way to full recovery and not even half way yet.
Your right knee is only just one month old, so it's still a helpless baby that will need another 11 months before it's 100% recovered.
That's not to say that both your knees won't be much more reliable in less time than it takes to recover fully but, right now, you're both being rather unrealistic, and expecting more progress than is possible.

You are having a normal recovery and you are going to come out of this able to walk well and to trust both your knees. Try to take some deep breaths and stop imagining the worst. Give yourself some time.
Remember this:

and also this:

 

[Celle]

@sondrals , you had two major surgeries in 5 months, so you have a double whammy of things like the
Energy drain for TKRs . That means that your knees will be taking almost all of your energy and there isn't much left at all for all your other needs.

In addition, your left knee is having to do extra duty as your main support, while your right knee is so new. That's putting additional load on it, so it will recover a little more slowly than if you had only had one knee replaced.

Don't try to push yourself to use a cane yet, if you're finding it difficult, and don't let anyone tell you that you should. Your December knee isn't ready for it and your August knee still needs some help. Keep using the walker until you feel ready to manage without it. It's only a tool and there are no prizes for giving it up early. Some people use them for months, until their gait is normal.

 

[sondrals]

I think neither of us was prepared for one tkr let alone two. The second was kind of unplanned and a little rushed as to get it in before the end of the year. I also assumed my mom would be around to help but that ended up not being the case.

I have to go back to work part time Monday, very nervous, not about work but getting in/out of the building. I did take a big step tonight and drove for the first time since surgery. On the plus side other than being a bit nervous and it’s -6 outside it went fine. First we went the long way out of our neighborhood then we drove to McDonald’s for a snack (so healthy I know!). But it’s the same route and distance as my work. My knee felt fine, honestly better than before surgery as prior to surgery it sometimes felt like it might dislocate when I had to sit pressing on the brake. None of that now at all. Practiced stomping on the brakes and that was fine other than it being worthless because it’s so icy here due to negative temperatures and ice fog.

Ive decided I’m just going to use my walker a while longer. It’s too icy and I’m just not ready. the metal frame one should be easy to fold down and pull into the car with me. My surgeon can be mad at me if he wants but I’m they’re my knees and my life and I do not want to fall. I don’t know if he’ll be mad or not, I hope he understands but oh well if he doesn’t.

 

[LD of Michigan]

I hear you sandrals. Just try to be gentle to yourself as you heal. Don't try to do superwoman when you return, just do your work and your coworkers cannot judge that, especially as you're easing back in ala part-time status. I am ordering a extra cane to have on my job site should I need it on those days I may tire unexpectedly. A cane is socially acceptable especially when people know it is part of recovery.

Come here to vent. We are here for you when some people just may not get it.

I was alway nervous about falling in the weather we have and that will only increase for certain.

I walk unapologetically slowly on ice/ snow and plan on reducing the stuff in my purse to lighten my load. Hah. I too had a righty TKR so driving first time will be most interesting. Though I am more than ready! Laughed about your going to McDonalds. I had a friend drive me to a local coney island yesterday for a couple of dogs and chili-cheese fries. Total trash food, but sometimes you just gotta have some!!

The good thing you'll find, looking back, is that both knees have been addressed. You'll get thru this.

 

[Macknit]

@sondrals, I think you posted earlier, but how far is your work from your home? I've spent a bit of time blaming my 35 minute one-way drive...it is ok in the AM, it's the evening that my knee starts to bark at me ( I wish it was a love nudge instead!)

And we're getting the snow and ice again ! White out conditions today...so glad it's Saturday...recumbent bike only for me today!

I try to move often at work, for all my other arthritis issues and I continue elevate and ice, with gel packs 80-90% of the time, however, my knee is still unhappy at the end of the day.

Hopefully, if you have a shorter drive and the ability to use the ice packs at work, your knees will make it! Do plan to rest once you're home...I still have DH do part of the dinner prep. As for the walker, I used it always when I went out up until about 6 weeks, then I used the cane at work for a long time.

My coworkers do try to invite me on the short 15 minute break walks that I periodically partake in, the loop includes a few hills so I don't do that every day...because it is too much for my entire leg. The IT band tightens and it pulls on my lower back and hip. I still have to go very slowly with my 4 month old!
PS...I take the grand-babies to McDonald's periodically, just as an excuse for me to enjoy the junk food too!!!

 

[Celle]

Ive decided I’m just going to use my walker a while longer. It’s too icy and I’m just not ready. the metal frame one should be easy to fold down and pull into the car with me. My surgeon can be mad at me if he wants but I’m they’re my knees and my life and I do not want to fall. I don’t know if he’ll be mad or not, I hope he understands but oh well if he doesn’t.

I'm really glad you've decided to stick with the walker for a while longer. You'll know when you're ready to give it up.

Don't worry about your surgeon. If he decides to be mad, that's his problem, not yours. You've made an adult decision, based on how you feel you will cope better - and that's perfectly OK. It;s your right to do that.

 

[sondrals]

@Macknit, my work is a mile from my house lol. I actually bought my house with work in mind (and I liked the area). So it’s maybe a 3-5 minute drive.

I’m going back for 4 hours. I’m still struggling with sleep so I know I’ll be pretty tired.

Sorry you’re getting ice and snow too. It warmed up to a whopping 0 today! I’m currently cuddled up with the dog under a blanket icing my knees.

 

[Starsfan22]

@sondrals...re: housework, one word.....roomba....saved my husbands life!

 

[sondrals]

@Starsfan22 we have a dog, there’s a really funny story about dog poo vs Roomba that’s kind of made me think they might not be a great idea. It’s hilarious but horrifying. We may have to reconsider though

 

[Macknit]

I'm not sure what the story is but the Roomba seems like a problem with any animal...or small child!!!

@sondrals, being part-time you should do OK as long as you come home and really rest or even nap! I did on my part time days at first, then it I had to go to fulltime! That still is hard for me... and it's been 2 months.

You are lucky that the drive is nice and short.

 

[sistersinhim]

Ive decided I’m just going to use my walker a while longer. It’s too icy and I’m just not ready.

I'm so glad you decided to keep on using it. That is the smart thing to do. Your safety comes first and you will know when it's time to give it up. Maybe it won't be until the spring, but who cares?

My surgeon can be mad at me if he wants but I’m they’re my knees and my life and I do not want to fall.

I bet you he would rather you be safe than fall. There's no reason at all for him to be angry.

 

[tlfiore]

@sondrals you have been so supportive of me and others. It's amazing how we can view other folks objectively; however, when it comes to viewing ourselves, some of us tend to be quite harsh!

PLEASE don't make the same mistake I made by trying to please the surgeon, the PT, the PA, the friend(s) and anyone else who has a "say" about your surgery. LISTEN TO YOUR INNER SELF. Listen to your body, heart, mind & soul.

You have been through a lot and you are only a few weeks out from your TKR. If it's icy and slick outside, of course use a walker, or whatever else makes you feel stabilized. Forget what anyone has to say about walkers. If you see progress and you are reaching milestones (however small), take heart to the progress you ARE making. Believe what is normal in recovery and try going with those things that IMPROVE WITH TIME. The tightness, the nagging pain, the swelling, the infusion, the discomfort, the sleep disturbances. All of these things are part of the process and do take time to correct.

As others have said, I think your boyfriend means well and he's trying to "do" something to help. Many times, people (especially men) feel helpless when someone they love is sad, or not feeling well. Natural inclination for many is to "do" something to help. It's hard for many folks to just remain still and think, process...provide support in non-measurable ways.

Please keep posting. We are all here for you!

 

[sondrals]

First day back to work for 4 hours. It felt good to get out of the house and be productive. Used my walker even in the office. I think somehow both legs are really weak, maybe it’s the winter and the recovery. It went relatively well though but after 4 hours I was ready to go home and ice/elevate. So that’s what I’m doing now and probably all I will do this evening. I’m hoping maybe work will help me to sleep at night *crosses fingers*

 

[Macknit]

I'm glad to hear things went well at work! I wish I did part-time for longer than 2 weeks! Enjoy your I & E time and remember to relax at work too!

 

[Helizabug]

I am glad that first day was good. I do the same when I get home, hit the ice and elevation.

 

[sistersinhim]

It is amazing how much ice and elevation helps to relieve the swelling and pain.