Ok. Finally had pt and massage after being gone for 10 days and dreaded it because I knew in massage it was the day we started work on my “terror zone” but more about that in a minute.
My pt measured me the minute I walked in, no warm up and in the position I measure lowest (on my back heel slide) 76. Not unhappy with that at all. We did some stretches with gravity and patellar manipulation and bang 87-90.
Due to a booking booboo I had massage right then instead after all my pt so she wished me luck and said to come see her when we were done and we would finished stretching.
So I’ve been putting off letting ANYONE touch medial border of my patella along my old scars. It’s a mental thing because I associate it with so much pain and the fact they reopened same scar twice in 2 diff surgeries. It’s also where I have the ripping and pain and block feeling trying to bend.
Today my rmt wanted to start working on it. She knows it’s my fear so she just put her hand on it gently so I get used to it and I broke into tears. Told her go for it.
We got thru 15min before I had to tap out. She said there is a chunk of scar tissue she estimates about 8cm x 5cm that is the worst she’s ever seen in all her years and it’s no wonder I’m struggling to bend further. It’s going to take a lot to break thru it.
She walked me back to my pt who took one look at my swollen red eyes and said “you’re done today. Onto the ice machine and ifc immediately “ Rmt told physio they should talk about what she found with OS when he arrived after lunch.
Home now in bed, ice hip to ankle, perc swallowed. Dear lord help me get thru this next few massage Fridays.