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THR Terrified of surgery - and it's happening next week

AftermarketPart

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I'm having a THR next week and I'm completely terrified. I know it's the right thing to do. I know I have selected the best possible team to do it. But this is my first real medical procedure and I'm really scared. I've tried informing myself, getting super well prepared, hypno therapy but none of that is really taking the edge off the fear. Any suggestions for other things to try most welcome.
 

Pumpkln

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I'm having a THR next week and I'm completely terrified.
I am having toe surgery tomorrow, understand your feeling terrified.
Doing relaxation breathing, and finishing up getting ready seems to help with the pre surgery jitters.

@djklaugh , has some great advice about positive affirmations that may help ease your fears.

Please post your surgery date, a moderator will add it to your signature for you. Having the exact date will help us properly advise you. Thanks!
 
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AftermarketPart

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Surgery date is 3rd May. I'll check out the affirmations.
 

djklaugh

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@AftermarketPart Welcome to BoneSmart :welome: Yes it can be very anxiety producing to have a first major surgery! First thing to keep in mind is that everyone you come in contact with - nurses, surgeon, anesthesiologist, etc - are professionals. They do these surgeries nearly every working day and have your best out come as their top priority!

One of the things I did before my hip replacements ( had 2 bad hips at the same time so had both replaced at the same time) was to spend some time in meditation. I did this the night before surgery. I got as comfortable as possible on my couch and put my attention on my old and very painful hip joints. Quietly, to myself, I thanked both for their service, remembered some really wonderful things we'd done together during my life, and let them know that their pain would soon be over.

Some affirmations that may help:

I am relaxed and calm as I prepare for this surgery
My surgery will be successful
I will wake up easily and feel refreshed after surgery.
When I wake up after surgery, my pain will be managed.
My body will work efficiently to heal after my surgery.
I trust my health care team to use their skills for my good and to promote healing

I also found that hanging on to my sense of humor helped as well - not to make a joke of every thing but just to be aware of any thing that might have a bit of silly with in it. Just an example from my own experience. During the pre op time the nurse who was helping me get ready (into gown, start IV, do vital signs, etc) approached with a large marker pen in hand - it is standard procedure for hospitals to mark which body part is being operated on and you will be asked by nearly EVERY PERSON which hip is to be replaced - she asked which hip was going to be replaced and when I said both she looked very confused and had to go back to my chart to check. As she saw that yes I was having both hips replaced she slipped the pen back into her pocket. And I just grinned at her.

If you still have a lot of anxiety the day of surgery do tell the nurse - they are very use to this and can give you something to ease the anxiety.

I hope this helps! And do ask any other questions you might have. We do like to help
 

Mersada

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I was terrified as well. I am so happy I got it over with. Still recovering right now but my imagination was much worse than the actual. You will be ok. There is alot of support on this forum. Keep posting your concerns because most likely there will be people reading who are lurkers with similar concerns. I lurked and also posted for about over two years. I learned a lot from this forum about how to prepare and a little on what to expect... Which is hard to determine because no two recoveriea are the same. good luck on your surgery... Will be looking forward to.your recovery thread.
 

karwask

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I'm scheduled for my THR on May 25th. In my mind I've kind of divided things up into categories and I think that's what's helping me be not afraid and actually looking forward to the moment I'm on the gurney being wheeled in for the procedure! I'm expending so much energy in getting prepared to do all I can to have a great recovery. And/but, when the big day comes, it's not my jurisdiction, so to speak. I cannot do anything to be the person who is the surgeon or who can perform the function of the nurses or the aesthetician, etc. So, at that juncture in time, there's nothing to do but relax and let the pros take over and do what they do best, put myself totally and entirely in their hands. Fortunately I have a long time meditation practice and when I picture myself on the table, to whatever degree I'm awake, I would just focus on my breathing in and out and just tune out everything and everyone around me, just go deeply inside and breathe. So, I don't know if this helps but I'm wishing for you that there is calm and serenity to be found. Best to you.
 
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AftermarketPart

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Thanks all. I don't actually think anything bad will happen, and while I'm not exactly looking forward to the recovery, I think it will be fine. I just have a complete horror of bits of me being removed. I've managed to deal with most of the anxiety with a LOT of information (seriously - I've read a great deal about the procedure, I've met all the people involved, I've even chosen my bed, I know what I'm going to eat afterwards, I know what drugs I'll be given). So my rational self is doing great. It's just that lizard brain is still in a total panic. This is literally my first ever invasive medical procedure (unless you count that wart I had frozen off my finger 20 years ago....)
 

DGrant

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I'm having a TRHR next week also, and even though it's my second one, I'm a bit apprehensive. I'm having a new surgeon this time, and apparently a different approach(anterior this time vs posterior last time).... so it will be a bit different.

On top of that, because of covid-19, no visitors or family allowed in the facility.. period. My wife will drop me at the front door, and pick me up 24hrs later(give or take).
That's my biggest problem. My main support and rock won't be there... and I must go this journey alone.

The first thing I will do is ask for the happy pills... no doubt. I want them, I want them all! The surgery aspect is what it is, but that I can't have any support base from outside the hospital is disheartening.
The last time I had my LTHR in 2015 my wife was there for the duration... stayed in the recliner in the room. I wanted for nothing, and we did very well as a team... and I recovered quickly and very well.

I totally understand the fear though. It helps to me think about what life will be like in a few months or less though, as I do believe it will be much better.

As hard as it is, just trust the doctors and staff. They will take good care of you... especially if you're scared. I wish you well on your journey, and I wish you many years of good life with your new hip. I'm confident you'll find your peace too. There's many good people right on this forum, and very good information.
 

Spex10

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The feeling of relief after 'it' is over is terrific. The prospect of my first then second knee replacements hung over me casting a shadow over life until, one day, it was past. Suddenly all I had to do was recover.
Trust to the doctors' skill and the kindness and efficiency of the nurses. All wool go better than you think.
 

Layla

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I just have a complete horror of bits of me being removed.
I think this is common to varying degrees for everyone. No one really wants to lose their natural hip. I know that I didn’t and even had tearful moments falling asleep the night before my surgery. I thanked God for all of the years my natural hip served me well with the realization is was no longer allowing me to partake in life in the way I wanted to due to pain and limited mobility. We’re blessed we live in a time that THR allows us a second chance and the ability to move forward without pain and limitations. You’re going to love the result this surgery brings. I look forward to following your healing journey and will see you on the flip side soon!

Wishing you comfort as you await your big day on Monday. :)
 

Rhiannon89

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I completely understand, I'm going in tuesday and although I've been through it before this time seems different and its purely because I have to do it alone. I have to say goodbye to my boyfriend at the door and wont see him again until I'm allowed to be discharged! Such a horrible way to go through surgery. But we can do it, we will be pain free soon and will just have to deal with the horrible bit inbetween (but it wont last long)

I hope your surgery is uneventful and you'll be on the other side in no time
 

DancerHips

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I was completely insane before mine. Went around updating beneficiaries, doing healthcare POA (while in quarantine, needing non-family witnesses, that was fun). I allowed myself to "hit the wall" and just veg out at the end of the day when it all got to be too much. I also told myself that I had done everything right that I controlled (prepping per bonesmart recs, good doctor etc) and it was just too controlling to worry after that. Wish I had better advice but alas I didn't really handle it well and still got through. Good luck!
 

DGrant

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Thanks @Layla
I've decided that current hip is a bit of a traitor to the cause - and needs to be replaced with one that is more aligned with the general program of what I need it to do. Also I am choosing a name for new hip and making plans for us :)
I like it! I haven't named my new hip, but I did feed my old hip a nice grilled Rib Eye steak last night, and thanked it for everywhere it's taken me over the years. Strangely today it's reciprocating by giving me very little pain, and we'll be saying our goodbyes to it next week. I'm sure it's ready to go on it's journey as well, and it will do great at welcoming my new hip. A little humor goes a long way right.

As I thought about it over a glass of wine last night I figured why not... so my wife and I started coming with all kinds of crazy stuff for a send off for my old hip.... and talking about what we're going to do with our new hip. There's some serious possibilities that will be soon well within our reach. We both had a good laugh we so needed, as well as now have a new lease on hopes and dreams.

We're getting close to having the healing begin... and now in many ways it's already started, as yours sounds like it has as well... :)
 

BellaMac

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I'm having a THR next week and I'm completely terrified. I know it's the right thing to do. I know I have selected the best possible team to do it. But this is my first real medical procedure and I'm really scared. I've tried informing myself, getting super well prepared, hypno therapy but none of that is really taking the edge off the fear. Any suggestions for other things to try most welcome.
Good luck on your surgery tomorrow
 

BellaMac

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I'm having a TRHR next week also, and even though it's my second one, I'm a bit apprehensive. I'm having a new surgeon this time, and apparently a different approach(anterior this time vs posterior last time).... so it will be a bit different.

On top of that, because of covid-19, no visitors or family allowed in the facility.. period. My wife will drop me at the front door, and pick me up 24hrs later(give or take).
That's my biggest problem. My main support and rock won't be there... and I must go this journey alone.

The first thing I will do is ask for the happy pills... no doubt. I want them, I want them all! The surgery aspect is what it is, but that I can't have any support base from outside the hospital is disheartening.
The last time I had my LTHR in 2015 my wife was there for the duration... stayed in the recliner in the room. I wanted for nothing, and we did very well as a team... and I recovered quickly and very well.

I totally understand the fear though. It helps to me think about what life will be like in a few months or less though, as I do believe it will be much better.

As hard as it is, just trust the doctors and staff. They will take good care of you... especially if you're scared. I wish you well on your journey, and I wish you many years of good life with your new hip. I'm confident you'll find your peace too. There's many good people right on this forum, and very good information.
When my surgery was scheduled, I was told no support person allowed too. A few days before my surgery I was informed the updated covid restrictions at my hospital, will allow me one support person. Hallelujah! Do double check!!!!
 

DGrant

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When my surgery was scheduled, I was told no support person allowed too. A few days before my surgery I was informed the updated covid restrictions at my hospital, will allow me one support person. Hallelujah! Do double check!!!!
Thank you Thank you! We will definitely do that... and that's somewhat what I'm hoping for. I did question it again when I got the scheduling call last week, but as things ease up, it's worth another try...we are in the month of May now, vs last week was April... We've both got our vaccinations several weeks ago, in anticipation of the upcoming surgery and hospital stay so there'd be no question about that.
You gave me hope right there... and thank you again!
 

NightQuilter

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Good luck tomorrow @AftermarketPart ! You've done what you can to prepare mentally and physically. Apprehension is normal, but tomorrow is the first day on the way to a more productive, painfree way of living. We'll be here waiting to hear from you and support you through recovery.
 

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