Solar7
junior member
United States
I'll update the title (or ask mods to do so) as things update, but I'm approved to move forward, and the surgical date will be locked in soon... most likely very late August, or early-mid September. As anyone that's read my threads knows, I'm following up a pretty complicated situation as a younger person (36) where I broke my pelvis last year. I've had lots of doubts about this, but I have avascular necrosis in my femoral head on the opposite side of my break.
Followup scans are showing that the avascular necrosis (AVN) on the soon-to-be-replaced left side has halted if not healed a bit, and the AVN on my right side has recovered to levels that radiologists aren't diagnosing it at all, meaning I'm years away from needing any replacement there, if at all. Regardless, I'm getting my left side replaced. A year ago my cartilage was perfect... now the AVN is starting to hurt it.
What's frustrating is that tonight I was able to singularly balance on my soon to be operative hip for the first time in a while, with no assistance. I've always had the balance of a flamingo, meaning I could stand on one leg practically indefinitely. And on the side of the pelvis that I broke, it's healed so much so that doctors say there's not even evidence of the break. I'm able to stand and balance on that leg like nothing ever happened, and I can pick myself up and out of a chair with it without using my arms or the pre-operative leg (not that I'm planning on trying that out of a chair when surgery is complete, but I have some newfound confidence that I won't be really struggling trying to get into a walker).
I'm having an anterior approach with Mako assist, and while I 100% have listened to the others on the forum here about how approach isn't that important vs. trusting your surgeon and care team, it's what I want. I feel too young to cut through a lot of tissue, I feel the restrictions imposed on a posterior approach are really bad for me given how I normally function, and the chances of a limp from the lateral approach would make me wonder why I bothered with the surgery in the first place if I had to deal with that permanently. Being numb in my thigh and some zaps seem more tolerable long term.
But, that brings me to my next point - I don't have any strong trust in my surgeon or care team. He seems good enough. I guess the best of my limited options. I prefer him to the other insurance covered surgeons. He's not sending any home PT. He's leaving the state for good after my 6 week appointment. If anything goes wrong... I have no idea what we'll do (the we being myself and my parents who are taking care of me and temporarily helping me financially). I really wish I had a wider range of options, but it's either this office, or I pay out of pocket, and I'm at least relatively closer to paying my high deductible in this case.
There's some layers of interest here. If I hadn't quit my job last year, I'd have better coverage for a replacement, but I wouldn't have gone on the vacation where I broke my pelvis, and I wouldn't have gone to the doctor because my career doesn't let time off for doctor/dentist visits. You save those for interviews with other companies. My limp wouldn't be as pronounced without the time I spent in the hospital for that break. So I'd just be coping with no idea there was a problem. It's a mixed blessing I'm unemployed and hurt.
But I can't get a job for better insurance. No one wants to hire someone who needs 8-12 weeks off right off the bat.
It's so scary right now knowing that I can still do a fair amount of things with my legs, getting into this surgery where I don't know what waits for me on the other side. I've limped into some movies this year, and I still have what I call "good leg days" where I can stand like a normal person... and after those three months on crutches/in a wheelchair, I'm afraid to let those days go. Just today I stood for a nice ten minutes talking to my friend that's in from out of town, and while I wasn't walking right, the mostly pain free standing made me wonder if I'm making the right choice.
Lastly, I'm so frustrated with people's expectations of me. Something that has helped me in my career is to "underpromise and overdeliver," but everyone around me, including my surgeon, seems to want to constantly push the best case scenario as if it's the only scenario. I post here, on the hip replacement subreddit, and on a THR Facebook group, and I very much prefer to hear the realism of those going through struggles than hear the miraculous recovery stories. I don't want to get too optimistic about my own recovery, or let people around me set expectations of where I should be and when I should be getting back to work.
Like, my surgeon promised to my mom and I that I'd be driving at two weeks... but not 100% independent to be in my home until six weeks. That's insanely incongruent. How am I going to be able to drive and go do things, but not capable of say... safely taking a shower alone for another month after? Maybe he means a joyride around the neighborhood to see the sun, and not an hour in traffic, but the standards being set by him and the "my 96 year old aunt Eunice rejoined the circus on day three" crowd don't match what I hear here on BoneSmart, or from others who have actually had the procedure. The false positivity is becoming toxic, and will lead to people in my life getting disappointed with me.
Anyways, I figured I'd let my whole story live in this thread instead of the others I'd posted before, and as I get updates, I can ask the community here about other things I should know. Thanks for letting me vent.
Followup scans are showing that the avascular necrosis (AVN) on the soon-to-be-replaced left side has halted if not healed a bit, and the AVN on my right side has recovered to levels that radiologists aren't diagnosing it at all, meaning I'm years away from needing any replacement there, if at all. Regardless, I'm getting my left side replaced. A year ago my cartilage was perfect... now the AVN is starting to hurt it.
What's frustrating is that tonight I was able to singularly balance on my soon to be operative hip for the first time in a while, with no assistance. I've always had the balance of a flamingo, meaning I could stand on one leg practically indefinitely. And on the side of the pelvis that I broke, it's healed so much so that doctors say there's not even evidence of the break. I'm able to stand and balance on that leg like nothing ever happened, and I can pick myself up and out of a chair with it without using my arms or the pre-operative leg (not that I'm planning on trying that out of a chair when surgery is complete, but I have some newfound confidence that I won't be really struggling trying to get into a walker).
I'm having an anterior approach with Mako assist, and while I 100% have listened to the others on the forum here about how approach isn't that important vs. trusting your surgeon and care team, it's what I want. I feel too young to cut through a lot of tissue, I feel the restrictions imposed on a posterior approach are really bad for me given how I normally function, and the chances of a limp from the lateral approach would make me wonder why I bothered with the surgery in the first place if I had to deal with that permanently. Being numb in my thigh and some zaps seem more tolerable long term.
But, that brings me to my next point - I don't have any strong trust in my surgeon or care team. He seems good enough. I guess the best of my limited options. I prefer him to the other insurance covered surgeons. He's not sending any home PT. He's leaving the state for good after my 6 week appointment. If anything goes wrong... I have no idea what we'll do (the we being myself and my parents who are taking care of me and temporarily helping me financially). I really wish I had a wider range of options, but it's either this office, or I pay out of pocket, and I'm at least relatively closer to paying my high deductible in this case.
There's some layers of interest here. If I hadn't quit my job last year, I'd have better coverage for a replacement, but I wouldn't have gone on the vacation where I broke my pelvis, and I wouldn't have gone to the doctor because my career doesn't let time off for doctor/dentist visits. You save those for interviews with other companies. My limp wouldn't be as pronounced without the time I spent in the hospital for that break. So I'd just be coping with no idea there was a problem. It's a mixed blessing I'm unemployed and hurt.
But I can't get a job for better insurance. No one wants to hire someone who needs 8-12 weeks off right off the bat.
It's so scary right now knowing that I can still do a fair amount of things with my legs, getting into this surgery where I don't know what waits for me on the other side. I've limped into some movies this year, and I still have what I call "good leg days" where I can stand like a normal person... and after those three months on crutches/in a wheelchair, I'm afraid to let those days go. Just today I stood for a nice ten minutes talking to my friend that's in from out of town, and while I wasn't walking right, the mostly pain free standing made me wonder if I'm making the right choice.
Lastly, I'm so frustrated with people's expectations of me. Something that has helped me in my career is to "underpromise and overdeliver," but everyone around me, including my surgeon, seems to want to constantly push the best case scenario as if it's the only scenario. I post here, on the hip replacement subreddit, and on a THR Facebook group, and I very much prefer to hear the realism of those going through struggles than hear the miraculous recovery stories. I don't want to get too optimistic about my own recovery, or let people around me set expectations of where I should be and when I should be getting back to work.
Like, my surgeon promised to my mom and I that I'd be driving at two weeks... but not 100% independent to be in my home until six weeks. That's insanely incongruent. How am I going to be able to drive and go do things, but not capable of say... safely taking a shower alone for another month after? Maybe he means a joyride around the neighborhood to see the sun, and not an hour in traffic, but the standards being set by him and the "my 96 year old aunt Eunice rejoined the circus on day three" crowd don't match what I hear here on BoneSmart, or from others who have actually had the procedure. The false positivity is becoming toxic, and will lead to people in my life getting disappointed with me.
Anyways, I figured I'd let my whole story live in this thread instead of the others I'd posted before, and as I get updates, I can ask the community here about other things I should know. Thanks for letting me vent.
