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TKR Recovering nicely

Jaycey

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Maybe the grief explains why I can’t seem to want to read or knit or quilt.
Grief coupled with recovery from major surgery. Very tough! Hang in there my friend. It does take awhile for the energy to return.
 
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Mrty2019

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Maybe the grief explains why I can’t seem to want to read or knit or quilt.
Grief coupled with recovery from major surgery. Very tough! Hang in there my friend. It does take awhile for the energy to return.
I wonder if the grief and surgery is my excuse to just wallow. I am usually busy and active with things, but just don’t feel like engaging right now. Thanks for your thoughts.
 

Jaycey

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I wonder if the grief and surgery is my excuse to just wallow.
Well, you are the only person who can answer that question. But there's nothing wrong with a period of inactivity. Do you have friends who might meet up for coffee or lunch?
 
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Mrty2019

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Yes I have have friends and my sister and that helps. Thx
 
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Mrty2019

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Monday will be 12 weeks PO. I am still doing steps one at a time. When and how will I know I can trust taking stairs the normal way? Thx
 

Jaycey

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When and how will I know I can trust taking stairs the normal way?
There is no timeframe for this. But in most cases our members suddenly find themselves taking stairs the normal way. It's all about having the strength in your legs. If you haven't done stairs the normal way for a long time - it may take awhile.
 
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Mrty2019

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My knee was a sudden blowout this summer so I think my legs are strong. I occasionally catch myself taking steps the normal way. I think I will just not worry about it and let it happen like you said, thx
 

tlfiore

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@Mrty2019 I read and re-read your posts and I really feel for you. You have been through so much. I am glad you found this website and the wonderful people. I sound repetitive but I do not know how I'd be, or where I'd be if not for this website and these forums.

I was amongst the many who thought this surgery was next to nothing-silly me. A huge portion of my sentiment was influenced by what I heard from others. The standard placation about TKR is, "Oh...doctors perform millions of those things these days...it's nothing...people walk around within days...you'll be just fine." RIGHT!

Of course, most of us miss our autonomy, want our strength & independence back, dislike being burdensome on others. Soon after finding BoneSmart, which was just a few days before my TKR, I decided to go with the flow and let the process unfold.

It's been difficult, to say the least. Hardest things for me have been lack of an actual support system and poor pain management.

So here's an example, right?:
-Husband: "How did PT go today? What did the therapist say?"
-Me: "I had a rough day with hydrocodone, PT discharged me to outpatient. PT says though, "I'm doing too much, too soon...need to whittle it back some." Laundry, housework, pet care, etc
-Husband: "No worries...rest...I'll bring carry-out tonight."
-Me: "Hi...how was your day...take out?"
-Husband: "Oh, I THOUGHT YOU WOULD LIKE THIS...I BOUGHT TWO SIRLOIN BURGERS WITH BACON & MUSHROOMS FOR YOU TO GRILL TONIGHT."
-ME: :beg:

Feel better.
 
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Macknit

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@tlfiore Well the sirloin burgers sound good....what is he missing??? Have you always been the one to carry the chores and cooking...time for another sit down conversation!!:whistle:
 

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@Mrty2019 Grief is part of surgery too (loss of mobility, independence, and relaxation are a few) add that to your loss of your son, and I would say you have plenty of reason to just sit back and reflect. The busy-ness and projects will return, but you need time to process all of the loss. It doesn't ever go away though, I can say from personal experience, but it does fit into the tapestry of your life and your stamina and activity levels will improve.

Positive thoughts and prayers :praying: during this time!
 
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Mrty2019

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Thank you for everyone’s support. It helps a lot.
 
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Mrty2019

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Thursday it was 6 months since my son died. The Hospice counselor called to check on me the week before. At one point she said she thought I had PTSD due to witnessing everything my son went thru and end of life decisions that we had to make. Keep in mind I could not walk and was in a wheelchair for all of this. She said her supervisor is trained on a treatment for PTSD so I may call and see what that involves. I still have flash backs to the ventilator and all the tubes etc in SICU.
 

Jockette

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:console2: I’m sorry that there was so much trauma with your son’s death. PTSD is very real, I have some level of it from my partial replacement recovery. If you choose to talk with this person, I hope it will help.:console2:
 

Macknit

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@Mrty2019 PTSD happens for so many reasons. The number one statistic for PTSD is car accidents, not war or other types of abuse (sorry, my counseling background might spill over here.) Talking through the issues and about your flashbacks is one of the steps to help your brain process all that you had to do and all that happened to you and your family.

I would highly recommend talking to the person your Hospice counselor mentioned. I wish you the best with this huge aspect in your life.

Blessings :praying:
 

Macknit

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I love knitting, but with this recovery overall I don't think I really got back into it until 5 or 6 weeks! I liked just watching Netflix or Hallmark movies....to numb myself! I came to life when I could write and whine on BoneSmart :heehee:
 

Motherbone

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I've had zero attention span after all of my various surgeries. Hopefully yours will gradually improve as mine did. You've had a terrible year. These losses burn themselves into our character but they don't have to control our future, so don't feel bad about talking to someone about how you are doing.
 

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