THR Mayhip8's recovery thread

Good evening everybody, I can’t begin to thank you once again for your amazing support and words of comfort, I confess I had a little bit too much alcohol than is good for me last night but also some good chats online and face-to-face with my friends and family, “ Chewing the fat” so to speak, and ended up putting the world to rights one - of my friends reckons she is a witch and she offered to put a spell on He who shall not be named but forever referred to as ‘DRACONIAN DOC’ for me! Needless to say I woke up this morning feeling awful mainly because of the wine I drank and going to bed at 4AM !!! Initially I felt quite despondent and then I remembered I have a saying I say to others frequently ..“ When things go wrong don’t go with them “....I lay on my bed and made a playlist on Spotify full of positive songs and proceeded to connect to my Bluetooth speaker and blasted it through the house singing at the top of my voice whilst preparing breakfast for the family, who entered the room looking perplexed and surprised !,,, I think I scared them with the loudness of my amazing voice ( I may have mentioned before I think , I sing like Alison Moyet and have the comedy value of Dawn French, and look like a good mix between the two of them !,,,) It’s Hard to stay negative when you’re belting out the lyrics to “ What’s going on” (by 4 non blondes) . We spent the morning together and then my youngest daughter came with me to physio where I had some good massage and manipulation of my shoulder joint which is easing every day. One of my sisters came round later on and we had some good time together, after a couple of hours in front of the telly having an “ it’s and bits “ type of tea meal. We watched a particularly harrowing episode of Coronation Street and then ‘goggle box,‘- it’s “stand up to cancer “ night on our telly here tonight, and hearing some of the harrowing stories that others have experienced sort of puts my predicament into perspective. I will get over this and I will get through this with your amazing support and positive messages for which I thank you from the bottom of my heart. I think I’m going to see my GP on Monday and ask for a change of consultant, I’m also going to go back to work next week as I feel ready to psychologically. It’s time I gave something back. I hope everyone has a lovely weekend and that you are Comfortable pain-free and as happy as you can be. @CrissyW, I hope you have a fantastic time in Alderley edge and that the rain holds off for you, (which I absolutely doubt because the forecast is dreadful!,) I wonder if next time you plan to come over this way we could think about meeting up as I am literally 20 minutes away from there. It would be good to meet you in person?!
Love hugs and positive vibes xxxxxxxx
 
Oh my stars, @Mayhip8 :xmark:

What a total jerk and:blackcloud:oooh, that makes me angry on your behalf.
Not worth letting his horrid remarks live rent free in your mind.
Not sure what the alternatives are across the pond, but please try to pursue this somehow and if there is a way to issue a complaint, I would do that too.
You ARE a nurse, and the whole conversation is patronizing considering this and as you say, how are we to address our weight when we cant get mobile? Im so sorry he hurt you with his insensitive words.
Hugs xxxx:roseshwr:
 
@Mayhip8 i think your suggestion sounds fantastic. We could do coffee, cake and chat on a non virtual visit!! You stay positive and I'm making sure I have my umbrella to hand as that rain forecast sounds dreadful! Xx
 
May hip that is awful and I completely empathise. My own surgeon was pretty horrible to me too and I had to wait two years for surgery. He even had a go at me after the op re my weight when doing the rounds with his acolytes. Also thanks to him I was very undernedicated as he believed in minimal dosage so was in a lot of pain immediately after the surgery. I was on the same dosage as a neighbouring patient half my weight. She was in nirvana and I was in hell... If I were in the same situation again I think I would have made more fuss and got the op done earlier. My surgeon has a reputation for being very rude and even the nurses pulled faces when his name was mentioned. My bmi after the weightloss was around 33 so borderline obese!

the good news is that the surgeon did know what he was doing and the hip is very good now and I am finally losing weight. Please get another surgeon ,jaycey had some good advice for me I was in despair over this. @Jaycey...

I hope you get a resolution soon.
 
@Mayhip8 This is just appalling! Head should roll! After so many cancellations they should be apologising to you and getting you the first possible slot on the surgery list!

I guess the question is do you want to find another surgeon? If so, I may be able to help. If you tell me what hospital you went to and the surgeon you saw (and the supposedly sick one as well) we will try and find you someone who has no connection this group. Are you willing to travel?
 
Can’t believe how appallingly you’ve been treated, your surgeons arrogance is breathtaking....do hope you make an official complaint when you’re in a better place, he can’t be allowed to behave like the bully that he is.

I’m not sure if you’re aware, but as a NHS patient you can choose your own hospital & surgeon anywhere in the country ( or at least you could when I asked for referral to OP back in May ). My GP was going to refer me to Whiston hospital but I asked if I could choose my own - he confirmed I could, and would send me a letter with choices in my locality. Letter arrived two days later, I rung the number provided & booked Liverpool Spire Hospital and appointment with consultant of my choice for June 6th. surgeon was lovely, with a gentle unassuming manner - he checked his diary & confirmed op would be 10/9 or 12/9 ....letter arrived two days later confirming former.

The hospital has its own dedicated bone & joint unit with around ten surgeons, half of who do THRs - you can view their profiles on Liverpool Spire website.I have nothing but praise for hospital & staff there....I’m making really good progress & would choose my surgeon & hospital again in a heartbeat.

I think I read that you were in Cheshire, so not that far away.....just a thought, as presumably you’ll be looking for yet another surgeon - whatever you decide to do, I wish you the very best, you certainly deserve it ! xx
 
:flwrysmile:Hi @Mayhip8
So glad to see everyone rallyed round on so many fronts to offer love and support and that you seem to be closer to your lovely optimistic self! In re all the advice you got from your fellow UK citizens it sounds like you have options and I hope you pursue them and get the respect and care you deserve. Going back to work is good too because you'll put on your nurse hat and your mind will be occupied with helping others feel better and will help pass the time till your turn comes again! Sending prayers for courage and perseverance your way.
You've got this!
 
Soooo... an update.. I’ve been mulling things over again today and asked two colleagues from different hospitals - NHS and private - both who worked with this surgeon - apparently he’s renowned for his poor communication skills and they judge him to be “ an OK” surgeon ... but both gave me the name of a better surgeon to consider . Also had a recommendation from my sons friend to consider Wrightington hospital( where I do know the famous surgeon John Charley developed the hip replacement back in the day) I think at the moment I will make an appointment to see my GP and discuss other options/ surgeon and hospital wise, with a view to the possibility of choosing the better alternative. I’m definitely more positive today and sort of made a decision to postpone surgery until the new year which gives me a chance to recouperate physically and mentally from the stress I’ve been under over the past few months. I had been looking at adjusting my diet in order to lose more weight anyway ( and by swimming and walking felt I was making inroads to my fitness) so have decided to start “ The fast 800/5:2 diet “ designed and supported by a medic and nutritionists. I’ve ordered the books off Amazon and they should arrive soon- I’ll give it a good chance to work and if I find I’m too hungry I will put the books to good use and make a book curry to scoff!!!!:heehee::rotfl:
once again I have been heartend by your support and great advice - and cannot thank you enough.
@Jaycey after I’ve spoken to my GP if I feel You can further help with finding me a surgeon / hospital I will be in touch ( I have to say I was blown away by your offer to step in and help me :thankyou:)
for everyone who took the time to respond and reply - I thank you :roseshwr:
sending love back to you all :loveshwr::loveshwr:
@ahipgma @ChrissyW @Elf1 @Calgal @Mojo333 @KarenKat @SurreyGirl
( apologies if I missed anyone!)
 
Also had a recommendation from my sons friend to consider Wrightington hospital
Well if you have a recommendation to go to Wrightington - go for it. Top in the country for THR!

So sorry you have to wait yet again. Maybe get on the wait list soon?
 
Oh @Mayhip8 I can't tell you how devastated and sorry I am for you.

Mr L needs an attitude adjustment. Who made him judge and jury??
It doesn't sound like he prepared for your consult, either! I sincerely hope you lodge a complaint.. maybe later, after you get the hip addressed by another, more competent surgeon!
You impress me with how you are able to shake things off and move on and am sure you are so thankful for your support team..oh and the wine. :heehee:

I interviewed with 4 surgeons before making my choice. One Dr stood out as being very arrogant, after leaving me in the waiting room for 2 hours and I finally get back into an exam room and asked him about my back issues and how that plays into a THR, he arrogantly asked me how did I even know I had back issues?? It was his tone and approach in delivering that question that was so insulting.
I am still mad at him, 4 years later! :gaah:
I hate to even ask this, dear Mayhip but will it be a long wait to see your primary physician again?

If I were in your country and knew the details I would be sending you a huge bouquet of flowers! But at least I can send you this: :flwrysmile: :console2:


Hang tough, I know you will, your resolve is so strong, but I am sorry it's being tested so!
 
You never know, this situation might end up as positive, you give yourself time to lose a bit more weight which will help with the recovery, and get yourself on the Wrightington list with a decent surgeon.

good luck with the diet. Post hip op I am doing the 16/8 combined with My Fitness Pal app. This is working slowly but surely. Pre-op my GP had me on the dreaded Orlistat pills which worked but were hard to do with a f/t job. The side effects can be awful!

best of luck!
 
Goodness many of us hippy sisters battle the weight as well. I started intermittent fasting and am trying to lower my carbs.
Except that I could never eat the plant based diet so highly recommended. It's so hard because at menopause and after it's another whammy on your efforts.
From what I learned it's never a diet, it's a lifestyle change that never goes away, so I'm doing the 1 step forward 2 steps back. Oh and over here @Thanksgiving people get stuffed along with the turkey then--- Christmas!!!!!. We could talk dieting and recovery, dear @Mayhip8 and cheer each other on. I'm so sad tho--- I guess my chocolate has to become virtual ????:bawl:
 
True about the weight issues. I'm right there too. Plus I've gained with my recovery.. which I am so mad at myself about.. I looked up your diet plan, Mayhip and I think I could manage that, too.
I rarely have time for a lunch break anyway, so I may as well make it into a planned way of eating.

I like how SurreyGirl thinks, this could be a positive and things could start moving very quickly in the right direction.. sure hope so!
 
Hi @Mayhip8
Just wanted to pop in and ask how you are feeling? November promises to be pretty crazy as a run up to the holidays.
How is your shoulder and being back to work? Thinking you are settled in with a plan for your surgery in the future, but living life in the meanwhile.
At my daughters house today watching Ari while our two night shift workers sleep.
They both work in ICU so no chance that they'll sleep while at work.
Please keep us in the loop if anything is new in your plan.
Take care! :flwrysmile:
 
Hi @Mayhip8
I think waiting until the new year and taking the time to collect yourself after the roller coaster ride you've been on is a great idea. You can prepare and look forward to the holidays with family and those you hold dear and when that's over move forward with your plans. You know we'll be here for you, staying close. That's a promise! :wink:
I hope you're enjoying the week so far. A relaxing afternoon and evening to you!
 
Adding to rant here. Oh my stars!!! The nerve of these surgeons. :hissy: I am glad you had a good “wine talk“ with your girlfriends, and that you are already moving on in your mind to a far superior surgeon.

My OS has been rude and insensitive many times over. Ended up there in emergency situation, but can say he would not have been selected if I’d had time to interview several. Just yesterday he was patronizing and indifferent to my situation. I think you are making a wise choice to move on. So good riddance!
 
Oh! @Fit4Family I’m so sorry to hear you too have been on the receiving end of an unprofessional surgeon, it saddens me in this day and age that there are still practitioners who feel they can speak to their patients the way they do. It’s not big and its not clever however if we can get the strength to rise above it we shall recover with the dignity we deserve. Thank you for dropping me a message, @ahipgma I had a telephone conversation with my Manager today who continues to be immensely supportive and she has arranged another phased return starting on Saturday for me. I have to say I am looking forward to returning to the office and the camaraderie of my lovely colleagues. I hope you had a lovely day with Ari and that your children managed some shuteye between shifts.
i’m feeling much more positive than I was this time last week, and went for a long walk in Alderley edge @ChrissyW :hiking:. I met a total stranger there and once again felt I was touched by an angel from the story she told and the coincidences we shared ! and now have a new friend in her as she wants to keep in touch. It never ceases to amaze me that there are so many people who want to remain positive and share their lives for the good. For me the good outweighs the less good.
So ladies I’ll await the letter from the consultant I spoke with last week, as I’m interested in what he thought he said to me, and whether he’s actually looked at my x-rays in the meantime, and then I shall respond to the letter accordingly. Im still not going with him he lost his chance to operate on the fabulous Mayhip8 !!! :heehee::rotfl:
sending you love hugs and positive vibes:loveshwr::roseshwr::flwrysmile::loveshwr:
 
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Atta girl @Mayhip8 !
Your optimism and emojis back in full force!
That's what I like to see!:ok:
I guess our @ChrissyW is still on the high seas?
I took my mom to my old hospital campus for a doctors appointment. I dont miss it at all. But I've got almost 10 years on you, and you've got dependent kids and at your age I was still saving for college years! It was always good for me to go to work when I had troubles because I could immerse myself in my patient's care and forget my own issues.
Colleagues can be very supportive and it seems as though your manager is too. All good!
Since my surgeries I have been trying to take better care of myself with other issues, mostly post menopausal stuff, weight gain
Etc. I figure this is my time now with both children gone, when you're busy with family stuff, your own needs get set aside.
I think we women just do that.
I live in a city with many hospitals and I think there is some competition for the patient dollar and many of the docs are nicer because of it. I hope you find all the help you need to have a first rate surgeon..... did you ever find out what was up with the doc that did your first surgery? Will check in again soon and maybe when our sailor girl gets home we should take a trip somewhere.
Love and hugs from:swim:across the pond!
 
Hey Ho hey Ho it’s back to work I go! :hiking:

A short shift for me followed by a nice relaxing swim, :swim:and a night with the family. @ahipgma I hope all is well with you and your mum, and that you are getting maximum enjoyment out of your retirement.I think another virtual trip away sounds fantastic, where shall we go this time ?:martini::):SUNsmile:
well ladies it’s been a busy few days for me catching up with domestic stuff and such to keep my mind occupied.
@ChrissyW I hope you had an enjoyable half term and look forward to hearing of your travels.

I‘ll love you and leave you there for now and hope you have a superb Saturday :dancy::spin:
much love:loveshwr::roseshwr::flwrysmile:
 
Hello and good morning! I'm back! Can't say I had the best time during the holiday as I've been, and still am, absolutely full of cold. I'm coughing and sneezing and sniffling for ENgland and have been since about Tuesday and feel dreadful if I'm being honest but the places visited were lovely, especially Honfleur. Some other issues too but I won't dwell on those. Glad to see what you have all been up to and that you had a lively walk in Alderley @Mayhip8. You sound more positive and I think your plans for new year are good, just nake sure this Christmas is as festive, fun filled and fantastic as you can. I love the whole festive season and am actually sat with a Christmas film on now. @ahipgma , I hope you will be sharing in the excitement that little Ari will have now Christmas is coming. Do you all go to midnight mass? Anyway, normality resumes today and back to work tomorrow so hoping this cold just does one and disappears quickly because I'm now officially bored of it!
Love and hugs (and probably best they are sent virtually so I don't spread my germs!) to you all and catch you all later. Ps @Mayhip8 ive not forgotten that we will need to plan a real catch up at some point xxx
 

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