THR Marvellous Marvin's New Home

[Pumpkin]

Whew! Glad you did not become unhinged during the last week. At least it is behind you and you are on the mend. Please let the hospital know of your experience, there is no excuse. Bring the housekeeper in, does she cook?

 

[Jamie]

Carol....your journal events are something else! As Z says, at least you'll have some great stories to swap the next time you sit around the old campfire. Holy bejeebies!!!!

It speaks well of your spirit to see how you have coped with all this. You should be very proud of that and give yourself a HUGE pat on the back. You are home now where you'll have a lot more control over what goes on and I'm sure things will begin to settle down quickly.

Make a list of things you need dear hubby to help with. I've found my guy does much better with specific instructions on a day-by-day (sometimes hourly-by-hourly :th_heehee basis. It's not that he doesn't care.....he likely just can't relate to what needs to be done.

Give us lots of posts! We love hearing from you and we're here for you always. (((HUGS)))

 

[Hagar]

Wow, Carol, WOW! You are one tough woman. Almost the opposite of my experience. I am disappointed in your husband, though. As my wife kept telling me, "for sickness and in health". If I could drive I would head up your way and give you a hand for a couple days. Courage, my friend - and keep your sense of humor!

 

[goatram]

Carol,
I will say this in defense of your husband. If you have not asked for help do so. If you have do so again. Us men are hard headed and Lost when the SWMBO is down for the Count. (SWMBO = She Who Must BE Obayed).The Knock upside the head does work on some of us. Jamie has it right we (Men) Need Directions but are afraid to ask for them. After my Wedding, First meal at home My wife sent me to watch TV while she cleaned up, Hate to say it but she set the pattern. I offered and She Declined so the story goes.

Your Pre Surgery Ordeal sounds unreal. I would have walked out when the pulled the IV out. Little did you know that things were going to get worse before they get Better. At day 6 things do start getting better thou. Things get easier, The walker starts to be left by the chair when you get up. You went to the Loo so many times in the past few days getting rid of the IV fluids, don't forget to continue drinking. Things return to normal except for the Scar and need for pain Meds.

Wish you well. It is cold but Sunny and I have a few more hours of Daylight so I am off to launch my boat and Play in the Lake with my new Fish Finder and Radar. Gotta learn it for the up coming fishing season.:hate-shocked:

I am Stupid enough to demand my other hip be cut out as well asap.:rolleyespink: See what I mean about us men?:th_heehee:
John aka goatram

 

[gizmo]

Hi Carol,
So sorry its been so hard for you. You deserved to have been looked after better than that. No wonder you have been feeling down, I doubt it possible to feel anything else after such a horrible time. You are so brave and will get through all this. So many good BoneSmartie thoughts are coming your way. At the start it can be just about getting through each day. I felt I was on a kind of survival mode. Four months on I occasionally have moments when I totally forget that I had a hip op -and I guess that happens more and more. As the days go on, it does take a while but normality does start to come back. My husband found it all very difficult too. And I found it difficult that he was finding it so difficult! Its tough physically and emotionally but you will get through.
Sending HUGS
Gizmo

 

[Lindawalms]

My husband found it extremely difficult - especially w/ young children - was a nightmare really - but it did end (well almost, still not 100 percent but close) and it does get better - just try to communicate as much as possible...you are doing great!!!
xoxo,
Linda.

 

[Jen]

The cluster that is my last day at the hospital is going to be a tough one to forget, but if I hang on to the memory I will have given it the permission to control a part of my life. I hope that the feeling surrounding it will fade as even now it's knocking me off my feet (that is if I was standing). <o:p></o:p>
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Carol, I do think that feeling will fade a little as you start feeling better, gain some strength and can appreciate Marvelous Marvin. Right now it is COMPLETELY understandable as to why you would have that feeling. It will get better .

 

[DallasSarah]

Wow Nelly!! What an experience, double, triple yikes!

Carol you write so well and love the way you journal! John-Goatram you rock with your male side of things and how it's tough to handle sometimes as a husband. I'm sure it's tough to see you other half go through this type of journey.

Carol hope you are resting, taking pain Meds, plus icing and being good to yourself.

Lots of love!

xxooxx

 

[Mad Rocker]

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You are not going to believe it I am getting sympathy pains on my left side (I had RTHR.) My left hip is pinching right in the ball/joint area. :rolleyespink:
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What a wonderful moment to open my blog and see the multitude of messages from you crazy bunch of guys. Who needs pain meds? <o:p></o:p>
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I really appreciate your thoughts John about the real other side of this situation and that is my hubby. I really have to remember that he is a team player and when the other part of the team is missing (and I mean even when I was away visiting ill mother) he was somewhat aimless. I have known that for ages (after all it's been 40 years) that he prefers to work with me around than say like me I'm quite OK alone.) Thanks John for the attitude adjustment. <o:p></o:p>
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I also have to remind myself that I created this :DOH:but today was much better; I was downstairs for the first time for a long period of time (although sleeping for the majority of it.) We watched golf and hockey (me with my eyes closed). Ladies you have reminded me that just as I would tell a stranger what I need I best start telling my hubby.
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I read somewhere that intimacy is a very different notion with women and men. Women want the hugging and kissing and holding hands, men just need to know that you are around somewhere. It works for hubby and me because I will be in the den on the computer or in the back yard puttering around and I'll look up and there he'll be just checking up on me.
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I must have been napping the day they told us the importance of ice. I missed icing the whole day I was discharged. Just iced some on the next day but have been icing almost continually these past two days and what a difference in the pain. And I knew that from in the hospital. Ice melted pain increased.
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I slept pretty good last night probably 6 hours somewhat broken. I find I am getting stiff from being in bed yet when I am sitting up I ache. What a conundrum! Pain is so much better. The OS did not leave a prescription for pain meds at the hospital. (He had mentioned to continue using the morphine, but of course the SR morphine is not enough for the days right after surgery. )Luckily I still had some percocet around, but that will run out before I see the OS on Friday. So I am hoping that I can get some without seeing my GP tomorrow to hold me til Friday.
Since I will be getting my left hip done within the year I have to assess what I will do. Stay with the same OS or find someone else. What do they say about the lessor of two evils?

Take Care Everyone

7:42 pm
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[Jen]

No prescription for pain meds?!? Carol, I hope your OS will give you the opportunity to address all of this when you see him this week. The post-op care has just not been right.

On a happier note, I am so glad you are getting some relief with the ice. They provided it in my hospital and I used it off and on when I got home but it took me a couple of days to realize that I should be more consistent with it. After that it was pure bliss.

Can you find a happy medium between sitting up straight and lying in bed? I found that it felt best if I could sit slightly reclined with my hips at a greater than 90 degree angle. Of course, take into account any precautions you might have.

Ahem. Tell Ms. Left Hip that now is not the time to be acting up and that she will just have to behave and wait her turn.

 

[Hagar]

Hello again, Carol.

My wife has to ask me to do things as men are just not as observant as women. We are generally airheads. Genetic malfunction. But once she lets me know she needs neither heaven nor hell will stop me from doing whatever she needs done. I just need to be poked!

I am just stunned about not getting a prescription for pain meds. I believe you are in Vancouver, CA. If you can make it down here to Seattle I would absolutely recommend my surgeon, my anesthesiologist, my nurses, even the hospital bed I was in. All except maybe the food, but the cream of wheat with brown sugar and raisins carried me through. That and the chicken noodle soup. What I really wanted was a couple pieces of pizza, loaded but for mushrooms. With your experiences, I would be a basket case. But women are far tougher than men!

Joking aside, I don't think I would use any part of your health care providers again. My Gosh, Carol, you must feel like you went 12 rounds with Muhammad Ali. There I go again.... men... we just can't help it!

Keep the posts coming, girl!

 

[Jaycey]

I just don't understand your OS not giving you enough pain meds. Please try your GP. It's so important at this stage to stay ahead of the pain.

Good news about getting your much needed sleep. Long may it continue! The other hip may just be reacting to the new way you are walking. Don't worry about that THR for now. Rest, ice and elevate. You'll get there!

 

[Pumpkin]

Hi Carol,
Hope today is a better day, I really appreciated Goatram's insight into the male psyche, great advice.
Hope you are able to sort out the medication problems, and get what you need so you can concentrate healing.
Rest, Ice, Elevate, and Medicate.

 

[Z15]

I would just like to formally disassociate myself with all the male bashing going on here... :wink1:

I've seen men do really dumb stuff...I've seen women do dumb stuff...I HAVE DONE dumb stuff. I think both gender are quite capable of less than ideal execution on a regular basis.

I'm guessing this is not a gender thing...

Z

 

[Jaycey]

Probably right Z. But I don't think it's male bashing. More educating ourselves and a reminder that everyone reacts differently to a situation.

Carol, any luck on the pain meds?

 

[dectjc]

Carol,
I just finished reading your whole post and all I can say is WOW. I like to think I am an easy going person, but from the point of them telling you the surgery was going to have to be rescheduled, to the ongoing mistakes they made during recovery, to them sending you home without pain meds, I would have went totally over the edge.

I have to say that it shows in your postings that you have an incredible sense of humor and that alone is probably the only reason you did not take any hostages in the hospital (well ok maybe the fact you couldnt walk was another reason).

I am purposly avoiding the gender discussion lol (yeah I am well trained!). I will say this, I like most men have to be told what the better half really wants (hope that helps)

Hang in there Carol, and that great sense of humor will get you through this. Oh yeah, you are just like my wife, naming everything, its great!

Best of luck

 

[Mad Rocker]

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7 days POP<o:p></o:p>
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Hello Everyone<o:p></o:p>
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I am doing much better thank you for all your best wishes and concern. I have been on the phone regarding getting narcotic meds without seeing me (my GP and OS need to swing this). <o:p></o:p>
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Today is a good day, sun shining, hummingbirds flying around, flowers starting to bloom. Thank heavens for the Pacific Westcoast.<o:p></o:p>
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I did not sleep very well; my pain was a dull ache all night in spite of the meds. I am starting to figure it out if I do too much my body will give me a kick in the head. :DOH: Also I have discovered the Holy Grail and its name is Ice and there ain't no Vanilla in it. Ice is the answer to the pain. I ran out last night and I knew it.<o:p></o:p>
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It started yesterday and I really noticed it this morning. My hubby…We are a weird pair as a matter of fact my sons (love them both) warn friends, girlfriends that we natter at each other all the time. It's chucking stuff at each other but strangely not in a malicious manner. Both of us grew up in difficult circumstances him much worse than me. We tease each other and I suppose it's the way we show affection. What has been happening ever since my surgery is I am not "normal". I am…frail is not the word but you get the idea. This has thrown him for a loop and it's not anything that I considered at all. I thought up of meals, housekeeper and stuff but I didn't consider the emotional part at all and in a way he has been swaying in the wind waiting for an anchor. <o:p></o:p>
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When I joined him downstairs yesterday to watch TV that was normal and the fact that I asked dumb irritating questions like I always do is normal. This morning I yelled out that I would like to have another cup of coffee and he said I thought that you would be walking by now. What do you think this is a nursing home? That started it---I said in sickness and in health and he said It's like living in a nut house for 40 years doesn't that count. That is normal.<o:p></o:p>
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He brought up the coffee and we discussed the upcoming income taxes and that he was going to a funeral after playing hockey did I need anything? How could I have missed this, but then identifying normality in this house is not really a clear thing to do.<o:p></o:p>
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<o:p></o:p>I just wanted everyone to know that before we start a war of the genders that sometimes women have no idea at all what is going on. One of our biggest problems is we are lateral thinkers. We are thinking of everything at once---what's for dinner, did I pay for the cable, do these pants make me look skinnier than my neighbour? Most of my life I have worked with men (I am a house painter by trade) and one of the biggest assets of working with men is they see a problem deal with it and then move on to another problem. They couldn't be bothered thinking of everything at once. What gets accomplished? I figure it has to do with primitive times. Men went out to hunt. Women were at home caring for the kiddies and making use of whatever came home for food. They would plan for a buffalo and sometimes have to adjust to a rabbit. Different thinking that is all that it is and believe you me sometimes I am embarrassed to be a female because we make it so darned difficult for ourselves. But then that's what we invented carnations. As my hubby once told a young fellow don't worry about it carnations are cheaper than roses. Gotta love him…..<o:p></o:p>

Take Care Everyone<o:p></o:p>
12:15 pm

BTW Tom I was considering going federal (I'm a public servant we go federal.) I just conldn't stop thinking how stupid the headlines would read Crazed woman in Walker takes hostages at Hopital. Didn't work....:hysterical:

 

[Yellowgopher]

Hey there Carol, it's great to read your updates, the sense of humour surrounding the events you had to endure and I can see that things are ever so slightly better - keep going, it's early days, keep going!

As for the male/female talk going on here - I'm male and I just wanted hugs and hand holding when I got out of hospital! I guess I am just in touch with my feminine side...

 

[Hagar]

As usual, Carol, an entertaining post!

As my daughter puts it, men want to fix things. Women sometimes just want their man to listen. She taught me a lot! And she reminds me to laugh at myself.

And the flowers aren't blooming down here in Seattle but you are right, what a gorgeous day! I just took a 400 yard walk with my wife and dogs and it was absolutely wonderful. Now resting with ice!

 

[goatram]

Carol,Z,and Hagar
I was not trying to start a International Domestic Dispute. I was just pointing out If Carol always took care of the Home front her Husband would be lost on what to do for her. We know how to fix things mechanically for the most part. Pain and Hurt is not easily fixed.

Carol it sounds like things are looking up for you. By now you have your meds and restocked the Ice reserves. I got the Gel Ice packs used two at a time and when not in use they where in the chest freezer. Easy and no mess, less chance to spring a leak.

Good night. I wish you a good sleep, pain free.
John