BoneSmart® Hip / Knee Replacement Forum
Joint Replacement Patient Advocacy
and Online Community
  1. Announcing BoneSmart's NEW Joint Surgeon Locator tool

    We are pleased to now offer a tool to help you find just the right surgeon for your needs.

    Read more about this in this announcement:

    Dismiss Notice

I will have a date tomorrow really scared

Discussion in 'Hip Replacement Pre-Op Area' started by mikeycat, May 5, 2019.

  1. Layla

    Layla FORUM ADVISOR Forum Advisor

    Member Since:
    Jun 26, 2017
    Messages:
    14,829
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    Minnesota
    Country:
    United States United States
    Extra, extra, read all about it, lol. You just successfully put it out there. :heehee:

    I think by the time we get here (BoneSmart) we're aware of the fact that we'll have a incision. Most of us not giving much thought to it since through the process we're given a second chance at life.
    Small price to pay. Wear it proudly.

    I experienced Posterior approach and as my only surgery, I have no comparison. I'm wondering where you got the idea it "will be harder". I had no difficulty sitting or sleeping. By choice, I slept in a recliner for three weeks straight, in two blocks of three-four hrs each, waking only once to use the bathroom midway through the night. I chose to sleep in the recliner only because I feared rolling over onto my incision while asleep. I had zero restrictions. I was cautioned to move slowly, cautiously and if something hurt, STOP.

    You can get through this. Many have successfully gone before you and many will triumphantly follow you.
    We do this for ourselves, first. No one expects us to be a martyr. It is our body and our choice, alone, to submit to surgery. You are doing it to lose the pain you're suffering, to increase the flexibility and mobility you've lost and move beyond the limitations imposed on you. Your husband may benefit in you having more to offer, physically, mentally and emotionally, sans the pain you're suffering, but the main reason you're doing it is for yourself. And you can still be a cheerful person, it's a choice. Fake it till you make it. And you will make it.
    Wishing you comfort and peace of mind.
    @mikeycat
     
    • Like Like x 4
    • Agree Agree x 4
  2. leejaa

    leejaa post-grad

    Member Since:
    Feb 3, 2013
    Age:
    65
    Messages:
    1,354
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    NY State
    Country:
    United States United States
    I had a posterior approach on my left hip and recovery was pretty smooth. I did not have an issue laying on my back at all - the incision is not on your buttocks but more to the side so you are not laying on it. I slept in my recliner for a couple of nights but then used my bed with no problems. Hip recovery is fairly smooth for most of us and easier than the knees. Even though you say you do not have pain, the loss of mobility must be a huge impact on your life especially as you like the great outdoors. It is frustrating not to be able to go out there and walk and see nature easily. This will enable you to enjoy the solitude and nature again. I, too, am not big on crowds and in fact live in the country on 70 acres with very few houses around. It is my haven to look out the windows and see fields and trees and birds, deer and fox and coyote in the fields. Right now it is frustrating that I cannot go walking around the property and see the changes that spring brings.

    When you get concerned, keep thinking of the things you will be able to do again easily and go and experience, it might help with the dark thoughts and concerns. You are too young to be limited by your hips.
     
    • Like Like x 4
    • Agree Agree x 1
    • Friendly Friendly x 1
  3. Elf1

    Elf1 member

    Member Since:
    Apr 2, 2019
    Age:
    63
    Messages:
    143
    Gender:
    Female
    Country:
    United States United States
    I had back surgery (fusion of L5/S1) a few years back, had two incisions where they entered the back to work on my spine and add my hardware, really wasn't hard to sleep on my back other than I'm not much of a back sleeper. They had pillows propped up all around me, between the legs, pretty much like everyone describes on here after surgery. Realize it was a different surgery but just to give you an idea. Think you will be ok, it's just the fear of the unknown that gets us.
     
    • Agree Agree x 1
  4. Ptarmigan

    Ptarmigan junior member

    Member Since:
    Apr 20, 2019
    Messages:
    58
    Gender:
    Female
    Country:
    United States United States
    @Jaycey @Layla One doesn’t have to look very far to see hundreds of articles - not on BoneSmart - that discuss many ways that posterior is a more difficult recovery than anterior, most of them written by doctors! In fact, this is the only place I know of that disagrees with that “conventional wisdom”. It’s an incredible relief for me to see this information here, because my surgeon is leaning towards posterior, but willing to do anterior if I prefer, and my older brother is adamantly in favor of anterior (he’s had both hips done).

    I understand a fearful reaction to seeing the scars, too. I’ve been so lucky - I don’t have any. I have never had stitches. Those “badges of honor” do answer questions about what to expect, but the hard truth here for me is this surgery represents a significant trauma - necessary, to be sure - but one I would have preferred to avoid - being a rational human being. I am coming to accept all of this as time goes by, but my first reaction was tears.

    It’s taken time for me to move through all the emotions associated with getting my diagnosis, learning about hip replacement and what it means for me in the short term, and making peace with what lies ahead. It is even harder to do this when managing a combination of sleep deprivation, chronic pain, and curtailed daily activity. I am so glad to see my normal cheerfulness return, but I wouldn’t say it was a choice. I would describe it more as an emotional storm running its course.
     
    • Like Like x 3
    • Friendly Friendly x 2
    Last edited: May 9, 2019
  5. Jaycey

    Jaycey SUPER MODERATOR Moderator

    Member Since:
    Jan 27, 2010
    Messages:
    27,760
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    Yorkshire
    Country:
    United Kingdom United Kingdom
    I would guess that the authors have not had THR. I had posterior for the left and lateral for the right hip. Having limped around for literally years before my left meant the recovery was more complex. But it was not complex due to the approach - more due to the condition of the joint prior to surgery.
     
    • Like Like x 1
  6. alexthecat

    alexthecat MODERATOR Administrator

    Member Since:
    Mar 1, 2010
    Age:
    52
    Messages:
    9,384
    Gender:
    Female
    Country:
    United States United States
    Many of those articles are sales pitches, written by people trying to sell readers on a particular surgical approach, performed by a particular surgeon. It's not "conventional wisdom". It's just advertising. The information that you find here is different because this is not a commercial website. We aren't here to make money off anyone's fears.

    Sent from my SM-S327VL using Tapatalk
     
    • Agree Agree x 2
    • Useful Useful x 1
  7. Cecropia

    Cecropia member

    Member Since:
    Apr 17, 2019
    Age:
    67
    Messages:
    118
    Gender:
    Female
    Country:
    United States United States
    If you Google something like "Why I went back to posterior hip replacement" an article will come up by a doctor who did both and why he went back to posterior. Anterior is a newer approach and you really want a doctor who has done a lot of them as they can be more difficult as the surgeon cannot get as good of a view of the hip joint and not everyone is as good candidate for anterior. So if you go with anterior ask how many your OS has done just for ease of mind. Whenever something is newer more doctors will be promoting it. Posterior is old school, but a lot of great improvements have been made doing posterior. I Google a lot too, too much actually, :shocked:I'm okay with my OS doing posterior. Try not to worry...:SUNsmile:
     
    • Like Like x 1
    • Agree Agree x 1
  8. julesglass

    julesglass senior

    Member Since:
    Apr 27, 2016
    Age:
    60
    Messages:
    347
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    Iowa
    Country:
    United States United States
    You know, I wish I had even thought of asking to have both done at one time. Would of saved me another surgery three yrs later. Mine was posterior and lefty will be the same. Gotta look hard to see the scar as he "super glued" incision. I love watching nature stuff on tv as I live in town. Can't wait to see if I can ride my son's horse when said and done. Oh, I did bowl a little four months after surgery and managed to get two strikes. Take peace into your heart and keep expressing your concerns with all here. Because we are all pulling for you cause we're all in this together.
     
    • Friendly Friendly x 4
    • Like Like x 1
  9. safari91

    safari91 new member

    Member Since:
    Apr 29, 2019
    Age:
    65
    Messages:
    9
    Gender:
    Male
    Country:
    United States United States
    Hey there :). I am a newbie here, and Monday coming up will be 7 weeks post op for me. I was pretty scared as well. My surgery was scheduled for 8:30 am with an arrival time at 5:30 am. Well I had a really had a rough night before. We overslept, and arrived at the Hospital at 6:30 am. I got undressed and slipped my gown on. The nurse came in, stuck a needle in my arm. A few minutes later the Dr. came in, about 8 seconds of chit chat and signed his name on my top right leg. He left, and in less than a minute I awoke in recovery. True story. They knocked me right out, and got with the program!! When I awoke, the very first thing I did was move both of my feet up and down. I was concerned about drop foot. That's where they accidently cut or stretch a nerve which limits your foots mobility. They both worked just fine. Amen.

    Within an hour or two, the nurses and PT came in and had me standing up, and walking to the restroom. For the life of me, I could not go. :( :bawl:. It was several hours later, and the threat of a catheter before I was finally able. Thank Goodness, lol.

    I did have the posterior approach done. ( It was on my right side ), and is absolutely fine, including the length. The point that I am trying to make for you is this. This site is hands down the Best support group you will find on the internet for what we all are having , or have already had for your particular surgery. I promise You!! And just a couple more things I would like to mention. Do yourself a favor. A couple days prior to surgery, take a really good laxative , and clean yourself out as best you can. Drink plenty of water, at least (4) 12 oz. glasses per day, and keep your meals light. Some good soups and salad. Stay away from breads and the like. This will make your trips to the restroom a lot easier. I'm sorry, not sure if your married or have a significant other that can help you get your home in order. Make sure you have one of those grabber things, to pick things up on the floor, or where ever you may need it. The other thing you might want to consider is raising your furniture if needed. (I had to raise all of our furniture up to 4 inches as I was to tall, and it was to short for me. Had I left alone, it was way to difficult to get up and down, and the degree to which I sat was way off of the guidelines they were asking for. And finally, If you need a toilet riser (I did not), get it in place prior to arrival home. Same thing with a cane , and walker. Get your house in order. Clean sheets the day of coming home!! Get some foods premade and reay to go. Soups, snacks, whatever you are going to want to eat. Depending on your level of support of course.

    Time is going to fly by. Don't Fear the Surgery. That's the easy part, it's over in the blink of an eye. It's the recovery is where the work comes in. For me, day 10 was the absolute worst, and best. That was the turning point where I could see it was all getting better very quickly. (Less a couple of complications I Had). Please where your leggings for as long as you are told. And most important of All. Do Not Hurry. Listen to the Moderator, and Nurse here. Your hips are going to heal just fine, without doing a whole lot. Just let Them. My thoughts and prayers will be with you daily, as well as many others here. Don't worry about little things, like scar lines and such. (I'm 65, and have many conversation starters, lol).

    And finally, sorry for rambling. I know I am forgetting to share something with you, but the other members here will help me out. You are going to feel like a whole new person very soon. God Bless, Take care, and cannot wait to hear from you on the other side.
     
    • Like Like x 6
    • Friendly Friendly x 2
    • Agree Agree x 1
  10. Carriemay60

    Carriemay60 post-grad

    Member Since:
    Aug 9, 2014
    Age:
    59
    Messages:
    1,788
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    Hamilton
    Country:
    Canada Canada
    My first surgery was posterior, this one was lateral. ( I only needed the revision because I broke my hip and they only did a partial replacement at that time). My current OS is the Chief here and very involved with the University as is my GP as a Prof. I don't want to claim my OS is the best because we all think that and they are the best for us if we get a good fit. My GP, who I trust 100% said if he or his family member had THR, my surgeon would be his only choice here. Although happy to go with my surgeons approach plan, I did ask about alternate approaches and it's his opinion that anterior is more susceptible to infection. My posterior was glued and you seriously have to hunt for the scar 5 years later but before it faded, it was hidden by my panties and bathing suit. My lateral scar is not but to be honest my scar doesn't bother me in the least, it's a reminder of how grateful I am for my eventual full recovery. The posterior is curved along the side of your bum so you do not sit or lay directly on it at all. Back sleeping is no fun for me but it is temporary and you do get used to it once you get your pillows, etc. all figured out. If I had two hips needing attention, I would go with the BTHR just to get it all done and overwith; not put myself the pre-op jitters twice, etc. The first few days will be tough but they are for every THR no matter if they are bilateral or single or what approach is used.
    Who is your surgeon?
     
    • Like Like x 1
    • Friendly Friendly x 1
  11. Mojo333

    Mojo333 FORUM ADVISOR Forum Advisor

    Member Since:
    Mar 8, 2017
    Age:
    55
    Messages:
    16,783
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    GA
    Country:
    United States United States
    Very true!

    Hope you are getting some peace about this @mikeycat
    Your surgeon sounds splendid and you deserve to get your life back!
    You can do this!
     
    • Agree Agree x 2
  12. jwadds

    jwadds junior member

    Member Since:
    Apr 4, 2019
    Messages:
    61
    Gender:
    Female
    Country:
    Canada Canada
    Hi @mikeycat, I'm day 12 of a bilateral THR, posterior approach, and even though the first week was rough, I'm quite amazed how much better I'm doing. Hips are stiff and sore, but pain can be managed with Tylenol, Tramadol and ice. I was really debilitated before I had the surgery so I was ready to have it, really didn't have a choice.... but I came to terms with the prospect that it may have to get worse, for a few days post op, before it gets better. But the good news is, after surgery, you are on the road to recovery and a better quality of life. I just keep visualizing all the things that l'll be able to do once I'm recovered... walk around Stanley Park, walk on the beach in Maui and maybe even take up yoga again. Just keep your eye on the prize and think of this stage as temporary. I only had 1 month notice for my surgery, so I didn't really have a lot of time to get too nervous. I'm sure you are in great hands with your surgeon. I think the best thing I did was rent a powerlift recliner and I've spent the last 5 days allowing myself to rest and get better. I live by myself and stocked the freezer with frozen meals so I can do quick prep without having to stand too long, although even only being 12 days out I think I can stand longer now that I could post op. Will be thinking of you and glad you found this site, everyone is incredibly helpful and supportive.
     
    • Like Like x 5
    • Friendly Friendly x 1
    Last edited: May 16, 2019 at 12:04 AM
  13. ahipgma

    ahipgma junior member

    Member Since:
    Apr 27, 2019
    Age:
    63
    Messages:
    38
    Gender:
    Female
    Country:
    United States United States
    I am hoping to have my second hip done hopefully Aug /Sept,-- 17 days out right now from my RTHR.
    One thing I definitely will not be afraid of next time is the surgery itself. It was unbelievably well organized and slick
    Knew nothing until I woke up in recovery.
    I am a nurse for 40 years I believe they will be able to find an antibiotic that will do what it needs to-- there is more than one way to skin a cat.
    Already this short time out my operated hip is getting better and less pain while this one that needs done is bugging me.
    Surgeons do what they do well. My surgeon would not do a bilateral but I wanted him so I went for it.
    Your surgeon is ready willing and able to do the bilateral--put yourself in his hands and be at peace.
    I had fears about everything concerning the surgery but all was well.
    For me it has not been a cake walk but I see light at the end of the tunnel--without the surgery for me at least there was only worsening pain and more and more limits on my activity.
    Come here often--- everyone cares and its wonderful.
    .
     
    • Like Like x 3
    • Friendly Friendly x 1
  14. mikeycat

    mikeycat junior member
    Thread Starter

    Member Since:
    Mar 2, 2019
    Messages:
    37
    Gender:
    Female
    Country:
    Canada Canada
    I have since seen my family doc who put me on prednisone again because of swelling in my hand and elbow and ativan for anxiety. I have never taken these kind of drugs--only thing I had been on is advil. Well the ativan makes me sleepy and makes me think of things I don't like to. Having reverse effect I would say. Barely got through this week-end and things appear bleaker to me rather than sunnier. I am to see my family doc again on Wednesday. She says if I m not ready I should postpone and she has never seen me this way--nor I. I know I should feel grateful that I can even have this surgery but I would rather not be here. I should forfeit my place to someone else more deserving and who wants this.At least I saw humming birds this week-end as we set up feeders-highlight of my week-end.
     
    • Friendly Friendly x 1
  15. Mojo333

    Mojo333 FORUM ADVISOR Forum Advisor

    Member Since:
    Mar 8, 2017
    Age:
    55
    Messages:
    16,783
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    GA
    Country:
    United States United States
    Hummingbirds are amazing. The ruby-throated flies 500 miles NON-STOP across the Gulf of Mexico during both its spring and fall migration.
    Now that is a great example of determination, persistence, and faith.
    If this hip surgery is creating uncontrollable anxiety..then maybe you should put it off.
    I would be lying if I said I wasn't afraid prior to my surgery though I never said it out loud.
    I was also desperate to get this done and get back to my life - and sleep.
    I hope you are able to get some peace about your decision.
     
    • Friendly Friendly x 1
  16. julesglass

    julesglass senior

    Member Since:
    Apr 27, 2016
    Age:
    60
    Messages:
    347
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    Iowa
    Country:
    United States United States
    Morning @mikeycat. You sound low in your mind. My heart goes out to you in your time of stress. I have dealt with depression and anxiety for most of my adult life. Went through a highly stressful two years in 91-92. I developed chest pains due to anxiety. It took meds and counseling to handle it. I'm much better with the meds, however it took some time finding the right meds and the right dose. Lack of sleep only adds to anxiety and the feeling of helplessness. If you think you need more time to except the need for new hips that's fine, however you are deserving for this surgery as anyone else. Just a thought, if you decide to cancel ask to schedule maybe three months from now. This would give you time to let your mind regain peace. The thought of surgery is overwhelming at first and when the date does get closer it does play on your mind, believe me we understand. You take care, peace be to you.
     
    • Friendly Friendly x 1
  17. Carriemay60

    Carriemay60 post-grad

    Member Since:
    Aug 9, 2014
    Age:
    59
    Messages:
    1,788
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    Hamilton
    Country:
    Canada Canada
    You have come so far into the waiting now, it would be a shame to cancel now and have to face another 3-4 months of anxiety. Only because it's now legal here, I wonder if you have considered cannabis? I think a lot of people that use for medical reasons are using for anxiety. You might think about having the discussion with your family doctor on Wednesday.
    Who is your Ortho surgeon?
     
    • Friendly Friendly x 1
  18. Cecropia

    Cecropia member

    Member Since:
    Apr 17, 2019
    Age:
    67
    Messages:
    118
    Gender:
    Female
    Country:
    United States United States
    @mikeycat
    You are 3 days after me. I am on klonopin for off label use, but is helping me get through this. I want to cancel my surgery too, but I'll be in bad shape if I do because I am in pain. My step son who works in orthopedic surgery gave me a pep talk last night. It calmed me down some. I have not had to increase my dose for klonopin, but I still have a week to go. I'm really scared too....very scared. I hope you make it....XOXO
     
    • Friendly Friendly x 2
    Last edited by a moderator: May 20, 2019 at 8:48 AM
  19. mikeycat

    mikeycat junior member
    Thread Starter

    Member Since:
    Mar 2, 2019
    Messages:
    37
    Gender:
    Female
    Country:
    Canada Canada
    Thank you all .Everything helps and yes Carriemay60 I have thought of cannabis. I need that 'I don't care attitude' and mellowness that cannabis would provide. I believe there is a dispensary close to my house. I will ask doc but it would have to be in pill form or edible as I will not smoke.I am experiencing this heightened raw feeling of doom.And I am so analytical. I have had a CLSC PT (I'm in Québec).They visit you at your house and tell you what you need to change etc. and they will be your PT for the time it needs at your house. They decide if you need re-hab and make arrangements, also other assistance with hygiene, meals, etc.There is a nurse who will visit 2x the second time to remove the staples.I am trying to see the future, down the road, really trying.And I know I am lucky.
     
    • Friendly Friendly x 1
  20. mikeycat

    mikeycat junior member
    Thread Starter

    Member Since:
    Mar 2, 2019
    Messages:
    37
    Gender:
    Female
    Country:
    Canada Canada
    @Cecropia I will ask about that med as well. I well know what you are feeling and it aint pretty. I don't know what to say to you as I am in the same water treading as you are. Somewhere we need to find it--that which will makes us move forward. You have pain that in and of itself must be a motivator like when you have a toothache and you just want it to end. I don't have the pain and I see pain afterward that's my little vision. But as many say here once over you will wonder why you did not do it earlier. I want to feel like that.
     
    • Friendly Friendly x 1

Share This Page

Sponsors
Close X