THR I am the Storm

[danelady]

So I had a phone meeting with my PCP caregiver. I had agreed to it last week....uchhh. They wanted to know if I needed a behavioral health person to help me. I said NO, we already spoken! I said it nicely, too. I've listened to everything they said and there's nothing more they have to offer me.
I really liked the hospital but I've caught them in too many lies. Did I tell you a nurse claimed I refused pain pills? The nurse told me about how I turned down pain meds.
I was never even asked. There's another hospital around the corner from them...don't get in my way next.time, lol.

Too bad, the Skilled Nursing Unit was nice.
I need to lay down again.
Take care all.

 

[Merrimay]

Do you get to go home soon, @danelady, or will you transfer to the other hospital? Rooting for you!!!

 

[danelady]

@Merrimay Merrimay I came home Sunday night....and they tried to keep me.

I forgot my phone in the truck when the nurse jerked me back and brought me back upstairs, so they couldn't contact me and the hospital wouldn't tell them where I was!

 

[Merrimay]

Oh, wow, yes, I've lost track! How are things going for you tonight?

 

[danelady]

@Merrimay I don't scream as much as I did yesterday so I guess it's improving, lol.
Today I was trying to turn on my side and even though I keep a pillow between my legs, it slipped a little while I was sleeping and my legs got tangled. Lol. I had to just STOP and totally relax my legs to untangle them.

My caretaker and her mom had to go shopping tonight but she will check on me before turning in for the night. That's all I need, someone to do and get the things I'm unable to do myself.

I live in southern Arizona and the next town over will be getting snow tonight. Um....what in the world? Lol. Me n Val are nice and warm at least.

 

[Merrimay]

You and Val being safe and warm and watched over sounds real good to me!

 

[Jamie]

I'm glad you have someone who is helping you. It's going to be really important for you to treat this hip very carefully for quite a while. Those bones will take weeks before they are healed. I'm thankful you have another hospital to use when needed. Obviously the one you were in didn't know how to deal with a patient who could think on their own. For the life of me, I can't figure out why they thought you might have needed a behavioral health person......they deal with substance abuse patients primarily.

Be sure and rate your past hospital if you have the opportunity to do a survey. Medicare tracks what patients record and it hits the hospitals in the financial belly if they get too many bad reports. Did you check to see if your surgeon has privileges at this other hospital?

 

[danelady]

Just want to pop in and say hi. I spend most of my days resting but it's getting easier and easier to get from the bed to the wheelchair and back again. I do the toe-touch shuffle a little faster now too. Don't worry, it's no where near fast...it just feels fast considering my past 2 weeks, lol.
@Jamie Jamie, they know how damn frustrated I am over this. They tell me how overwhelmed I must be feeling and they are there for me to talk to. I'm sorry, I don't need to talk, I need for this to end. I know all the buzzwords too, so they should stop using them on me. I know in my heart that so many of the people here understand what I'm going thru but I don't feel that any one in my PCP's office....including the mental health dept....understands so I have nothing to say. They all make appointments to have phone chats with me and each one asks me the same damn questions. Do they get paid by the question or by the answers they wrangle out of me?

I'm getting better, that's all that matters.
Thank you all again just for being here.

ps: It snowed the other night and unless the sun touched it directly.....it's still there!
Crazy! Soon it will be 100° and I cannot wait.

 

[Constanze]

Hi @danelady . You've said it well. I understand what it feels when medical staff are patronising. But you want to think for yourself und be involved in the recovery process. I had that experience after my accident when I broke my tibia head and they slowed down my recovery although I listened to my body and didn't overdo. So I changed my rehab doctor then.
I wish you a steady recovery and a nice spring

 

[Jamie]

Danelady.....this is how people behave when they don't know what they're doing. They just follow a script, check boxes, and write reports when dealing with people and don't really listen to them. You're wiser than they are about your body. You'll be fine if you keep listening to the messages it sends you and continue to give it time to heal from all this trauma.

 

[danelady]

@Jamie Thank you. My PCP called me earlier and I thought of ignoring it but I knew they would just continue calling.

I answered and asked why they were calling now. She said following up on my progress and did I want to talk.

I said I'm doing everything I should be doing and getting better without consulting with anyone. Am I in pain? Of course I have pain, but this week is better than last week.
The real pain I'm feeling is in my wallet.. .wanna talk about that? I didn't think so.

She took the hint and we said goodbye. You're so right Jaime, it takes knowing your body and being able to read the messages it sends you. In the hospital, PT wants to rush you through the check points so they can get you out of the bed and put another body in it.
I am not helpless, you are not helpless, so many of us are strong enough. They helped me and I'm grateful but right now let me continue this my way.

Thank you Constanze. I'm so glad I am part of this group of strong women. No men yet, but they are welcome, lol.

 

[Elf1]

@danelady happy to hear things are getting better, albeit slowly, but better. I know the longer I wander through life, its ups and downs, the harder it seems to put your faith and trust in the folks that are supposed to be the professionals. Unfortunately the medical community has become a huge business and less about taking care of people. That is why we have to continue to be strong and be our own advocates.

I know @Jamie had suggested that when you're feeling up to it you might want to send a letter to the hospital administrator/CEO about the treatment you received. These folks don't know what's happening on the floors in their hospitals if we don't tell them. I sent a very detailed letter to the CEO at the hospital where I had my THR. It got their attention, I received a call from the head Patient Advocate and the head of PT/OT about it. They also asked if they could read my letter to staff and use it for training purposes. They wanted to make sure the staff heard directly from a patient what its like to lay in that bed and be at their mercy. And I had nowhere near the issue s you did.

Keeping you in my thoughts, prayers and sending healing cyber hugs your way!

 

[danelady]

@Elf1 This is so true! I keep getting survey questionnaires but I don't feel that they are touching the heart of the issue. I believe letter is more appropriate.

The trucking industry has fallen by the wayside as well. It's become too expensive to own your own truck. The mega carriers are only interested in keeping their investors happy, not the driver's. Those days of the freedom of the open are going away...now they just want a warm body in the drivers seat. I had fun for a while but I want nothing to do with this modern trucking.....or healthcare.
Thank you so much for the kind words.

 

[Merrimay]

@danelady, a few years ago, a friend of mine contacted the office of the state of SC's Medical Omsbudsman when she received what she considered unacceptable treatment at a medical facility. I'm not sure about all the steps involved, but she began with a simple phone call to the state capitol. She was pleased with their investigation and advocacy on her behalf.

Another option for you maybe?

 

[spaniel]

Glad to hear you are doing a bit better. Gee- at least you get the "buzzwords" from the docs office. Where I am you just get mocked! Hah. With that said, complaining to the the patient advocate is rather fruitless as is writing to the hospital. The Reviews show very badly so its likely that the places dont really care about that given the circumstances in which they are working. With that siad, this does not mean you can be pushed around. The one place that strikes terror in a paractioner is the Office of Professional Misconduct. Again, here all complaints must be in writing and must be pretty objective. I have found that I personally wish to get along with practitioners as healing goes so much better, but I do know that ultimately a written report to the office of professional misconduct is a vital way to get action. BUT it is a very very serious thing to do and it must be absolutely justified. Any kind of actual abuse or significant neglect is reviewed. Every single case. That does not mean that it would resolve in your favor by any means. I worked toeghter with a doctor who was on the board of the OPMC and I did let my PC know this. I have no complaint with my PC... just saaying that I know the system, whcih, as you indicate, is rather broken at this time. But I have found good folks out there too and am very blessed for this. I do hope your healing continues. At some point for myself, I may contact a very very seasoned therapist who deals exlusinvely with medical PTSD. Not saying you should, but that can be helpful. I spoke to one the other day and man oh man she knocked it out of the ballpark. But yea, your run of the mill "behavioral" therapist is simply not trained in medical trauma just like they are not trained in soldiers' trauma. Well my two cents as I limp around in pain after a year post THR!

 

[Brookeer]

Oh my word! I’ve been catching up on what you’ve been going through. It’s horrendous having to go through all that. I haven’t got the words to say how sorry I am that your recovery is so awful.
I really hope you’ve turned a corner and you have a good recovery now.

 

[Layla]

Hi @danelady
I hope you're resting comfortably and your weekend is a peaceful one.
We're here for you when you need us.

 

[CricketHip]

Checking in! I bet you are all snugged up in bed watching some old murder mysteries.
At least I imagine you would enjoy those.

I can feel your frustration and am so sorry!
I had an incident once, in fact I've had several. But this one last ER and hospital stay was so egregious in their lack of care.
I checked myself out the next morning and got admitted to another hospital and had surgery later that night.
The next few weeks were a painful blur so I missed my chance to complain in a timely manner--
but when they sent me a bill for the balance due after the insurance portion was paid? I walked into the accounting office and told them I wouldn't be paying it and that they were lucky that I didn't talk to my insurance company about getting their payment refunded. I asked them to speak to the surgeon, since he knew what had happened, and who also helped get me discharged out of there that morning and poof! The balance was wiped clean!

So glad that you have yourself some "helpers" That eases the worry/frustration a bit, right?
Take care and try not to get into any trouble.. just kidding, but only a little.. hugs.!!

 

[Yogini]

I just caught up with your story. I will add you to my (kinda buddhist) healing prayers. Glad you have this supportive group to log your story with.

Dealing with over worked, bull headed medical staff is a real challenge. They do indeed need feedback and even deserve being reported. You may prevent further patient abuse. You are very courageous.

So terrible when you fall into that category of "oh so rare" medical "complications."

 

[danelady]

Been thinkin' 'bout you all, thank you so much for the kind and thoughtful words. Hope you are all doing well.

It's been the same here....1 warm day a week, then the rest of the week cold and blustery with snow or rain or snow AND rain. The reason I watch the weather so intensely is because my body feels less pain and wants to wake up when it's warm, lol. It was in the 70s for one day and I felt great!

But I do have a bit of good news to share!
I can now put my whole foot down and even a little weight as well! I am actually taking small steps now....with the walker of course.
I feel well enough to cook myself a couple of eggs in the morning from the wheelchair!
Peanut butter (super chunky) and jelly sandwich for lunch and light soup for dinner. I would rather regain my independence and prepare myself simple fare than expect friends to always feed me.

I definitely feel myself coming back. Slow and steady.

Am I wrong to not want this dr to touch me again? I said it many times last year but I needed help so I trusted him. I think when the fracture heals I'll be fine.

Love to you all.