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Encouragement needed badly....

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madame uk

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Hi Dewey, This time last year I was in Los Angeles visiting my son, I attempted to do some Christmas shopping, and after 15 minutes , had to return to the car, I was in tears, all those fabulous stores, and My knee just wouldnt let me walk, I was in agony, so did the best I could by ordering online.I had my LTKR 11 weeks ago, and 3 weeks ago, I was Christmas shopping here in London for 3 hours, with just short breaks, for rest and coffee, that to me sums up the difference.I was petrified of surgery, even though Id already had a replacement of my R knee in 2008, but this forum, and the thought of never being able to get to the shops, and being housebound gave me the c :chrisglitter: ourage to " get it over with" and, Im so glad I did.Just think Christmas shopping next year, for you, will be a pleasure, not long now, Best Wishes Teresa
 

ladyj

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Don't worry, Dewey, you will be fine.
It is frustrating not being able to get out to the shops, and Christmas buying on line is a good idea. Just think of next Christmas when you will be able to walk miles around town and will have your life back.
Just for this year, let the family look after you.
 
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Dewey

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Thank you all so much for your encouragement! It truly does help to be reminded that I WILL be able to make Christmas wonderful for my family next year! I'll find out what this is all about in just one month and 6 days! Then it's on to bigger and better things!

Thanks, again! I'm so, so glad I found this great site!
 

Lori-M

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Thank you all so much for your encouragement! It truly does help to be reminded that I WILL be able to make Christmas wonderful for my family next year! I'll find out what this is all about in just one month and 6 days! Then it's on to bigger and better things!

Thanks, again! I'm so, so glad I found this great site!
AMEN!

Merry Christmas Dewey!
:reindeers:
 

kneesrus

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As many have posted, life in pain is awful. Just doing a simple task because difficult. I had to wait 2 months before my OS could do my last knee. I did not eat breakfast for those 2 months just in case there was a cancellation, I could rush over fill in the spot. I was that desperate. It made the relief much more gratifying.
Since the Earth did not explode, you are only weeks away from starting a new life. I, on the other hand, have to do a great deal of shopping because the Earth didn't explode and there will be a Christmas. So, off to Wal-Mart I go. Shop 'til I drop.
David
 

misskitty

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I don't know if I should have started a new thread for this, but I wasn't sure how many people were following my other one. I am in need of encouraging words this morning.....

Just returned from a trip to Walmart. It was so hard to walk around that store and get some needed Christmas gifts! I have absolutely NO stamina now, and the pain is just horrible. I am afraid I'm just not going to be able to give my family a Christmas celebration like we've always had. I cried all the way home. I have a wonderful, supportive husband who will do anything I ask of him ( I know I'm so, so lucky!), but I WANT TO DO IT!

I'm scheduled for both knees in the beginning of the new year (end of Jan for right, and then 6 weeks later for left), and I just need someone to tell me that it WILL get better! I know the recovery period will be tough (and I'm dreading that), but I have to be able to believe that this constant pain when walking will go away! I feel like I've given up so much, and now I have to give up Christmas.

Sorry......this is just my first "real" pitty party, I guess. I have felt so fortunate to have found this site and all of it's wonderfully supportive posters. I'm looking for your kind, encouraging words today. Thanks, so much, in advance for anything you can say to help me cope.


Hey Dewey,

It really is going to fine. I am 53 single no kids or family and I am getting ready to do my second TKR. I did the 1st one on my right knee 2 years ago. Because I had to do recovery by myself I healed quicker then expected. I was back to work at 5 1/2 weeks. Do your therapy and you will feel so much better then you do now. It's ok to get a little down sometimes, but know the outcome is much better then your life with pain now. I check in January 7th, and surgery set for January 8th. I will keep you updated on how I am doing and I want you to do the same. Hang in there!!!
 

Knitter4444

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We are "pity party central". Bring it all here. I have used BS for several years to cry, yell and also support.
So my dear..right now your are so on edge with this pain. Pain brings people down. There is no strength to deal with the day to day stuff when you are fighting the pain..and it's hard to "just go with the flow" when you are suffering so.
Know that you will feel better. The pain post op is not the same. Just being able to walk without that horrible bone on bone..and with straight legs to boot.
We are here for you. Hard to understand right now that it will get better..but it does..really!!!!
 

RestAssured

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Dewey,
Anything you have questions about just ask! this is the friendliest and the most honest forum I have ever had the privilege of belonging to!
 
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Dewey

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There are so many wonderful people here! Thank you all so much for your support and encouragement. I already feel blessed to have you all to help me through this! And I WILL get through it......

I just have so many "What if's" going on in my head right now! And, for some reason, this is the worst pain I've ever experienced with these knees. Once the cortisone wore off, it's been worse than ever. It is so hard to function and think clearly when all I want to do is sit down! I'm actually wishing my surgery date was sooner than the end of January. Sure hope I can hold out like this that long!

I managed to prepare and serve a meal to 20 last night, and again for 8 today. My husband did A LOT of it, and I'm sure no one knew the pain I was in. It was hard, but I tried really hard to hide it from all. I am now exhausted and ready for bed! I'm praying that next Christmas is much, much better for me. Thank you all for helping me to realize that that hope really could come true!

I'm wishing a very Merry Christmas to you all! Thank you, again and again, for being there for me......and I haven't even truly begun the journey yet!
 

RestAssured

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I managed to prepare and serve a meal to 20 last night, and again for 8 today. My husband did A LOT of it, and I'm sure no one knew the pain I was in. It was hard, but I tried really hard to hide it from all. I am now exhausted and ready for bed! I'm praying that next Christmas is much, much better for me. Thank you all for helping me to realize that that hope really could come true!

Thank you, again and again, for being there for me......and I haven't even truly begun the journey yet!
Dewey,

That's just it! We are here for you before, during and after! We care about all of our BoneSmart family!

Serving and preparing for 20 people? No wonder your knees hurt! Did you feel obligated to do the dishes afterwords also? :yikes:

Before surgery I did good to get my braces on, take my walker and hobble to the table! Put those knees up, ice them and tell them you will be nicer until surgery! :happydance:
 

Roy Gardiner

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I'm praying that next Christmas is much, much better for me.
It will be.

Spring will be a challenge, summer will be pain-free getting better and better, autumn will be back to normal (how cool is that?), Christmas --- well, you might have forgotten all about your knees by then.
 

Lori-M

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I managed to prepare and serve a meal to 20 last night, and again for 8 today. My husband did A LOT of it, and I'm sure no one knew the pain I was in. It was hard, but I tried really hard to hide it from all. ...
Kudos to your husband!:yes!: Can I ask why you're hiding your pain from the people who care about you?:shrug: At least I imagine they're family and maybe friends who care about you. This might be presumptuous but I would think that your family would want to help you through the days and weeks leading up to your surgery; to make your life a little easier if possible. None of us can tell you what to do or how to handle your circumstances. We can only share our own stories. I needed help and my family and friends were very supportive.:yes: Perhaps there are reasons you don't want to share the extent of your pain with them.:what: I don't know of any benefit to be reaped by keeping your pain a secret but you have to do what is right for you. Just know that we care about you and want the very best outcome for you! Take care!
:console2:
 
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Dewey

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Thanks, again, for your caring words!

I don't really know why I try hard to hide how awful my knees are right now. I've always been a postitive person that goes and goes and seldom gives in to illness so I guess I'm trying to do that now. I absolutely hate to say I can't do it, even though it's really hard for me right now.

I know I'll have to change the way I think after the surgery, and I plan to really concentrate on my rehab instead of trying to push too hard. I WILL let others help me during the weeks after surgery because I know how important it is to listen to my knees.

Thanks, again, for listening and offering your thoughts. It truly does help!
 

referee54

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I just have so many "What if's" going on in my head right now! And, for some reason, this is the worst pain I've ever experienced with these knees. Once the cortisone wore off, it's been worse than ever. It is so hard to function and think clearly when all I want to do is sit down! I'm actually wishing my surgery date was sooner than the end of January. Sure hope I can hold out like this that long!
Many of us (OK--I would say all of us!) felt the same way. Thousands of thoughts spinning round and round---the "What if's" were always lurking somewhere. Don't worry about those "iffy" thoughts---things will become clearer---they did for me, and, while I was still somewhat nervous, I had an epiphany and realized just how terrible my knees were, and that I could not live with them and the pain that they brought me any more. You may, too, just like I did, that you will actually become excited about reclaiming your pain-free life!

I had to wait nine months before I could get my surgery done---I made the decision in February but my surgeon was booked all the way through most of October! I finally, nearly nine months later, had a BTKR on November 8th. Perhpas there will be a cancellation and yo can sneak in sooner!
 
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Dewey, start practicing now asking for help and accepting it gracefully so it is easier on you after surgery. Trust me, you will need help and the people who are your friends are happy to give it to you! For starters line up a few of your twenty to give you a meal after you get home and find one or two who can take a list to the store for you and pick up stuff that is easy to fix for weeks two and three of recovery. Our husbands get overworked in all of this too and sometimes grocery shopping on top of all the other stuff he has to do to keep things working is just too much.
 
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Dewey

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Just reread this nice post because I'm feeling pretty nervous tonight. I do pretty well during the day when I'm busy, but nighttime and early mornings in bed are particularily hard for me right now. My mind just won't stop with the "what ifs" about this upcoming surgery. I want to do things now to get ready for it so I don't have to think about it anymore!! I actually get sick to my stomach just thinking about what's to come!

I have a little more than THREE WEEKS yet. I'm afraid I will be a basket case by the time the surgery date gets here! What can I do to calm down a bit???
 

Campervan

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Try focusing on the positive side of the surgery - no more bone on bone pain. Yes you'll have post surgical pain for a while, but thats going to go away with time. Prior to my surgery I was very busy at work so I didn't have time to focus on he surgery until 5 days pre op. If you can't sleep, then get up and watch some TV, read a book, internet etc - anything to stop the negative thought process, which for some reason is always worse when in bed. Good luck.
 

Lori-M

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I agree with Margaret - fill up the quiet. I've read advice for people with plain old insomnia (not because of upcoming surgery in other words) and they say if you're having trouble sleeping then get up. Don't continue to lay there unable to sleep. Whether you choose to read, play a game, watch a movie or bake a cake, it's the quiet time that allows your mind to dwell on the what ifs so find somewhere else to put your focus. For example, have you thought about making up food and freezing it for after? You could cook a bunch of meals now, freeze them so your Hubby can prepare dinner for you two more easily after. That serves a double purpose.

Also? Use some of that time here on the boards -- especially the success stories.:yay: Reading all the positive outcomes should help with some of the what ifs, particularly if combined with doing other things to keep your mind occupied. It's natural to be nervous, but you're going to do fine.:yes!: Hang in there.
 
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