THR A New Ride Begins - The Puckhead's recovery

Happy One Month Anniversary!
I hope you have a wonderful weekend. :wave:
@thepuckhead
 
Happy month anniversary from me too, loving the updates and eagerly awaiting the Puck series on my kindle.
 
Hello from end of week 5/start of week 6! Thanks for the anniversary greetings, @Layla and @Klassy. Time is both flying by and standing still. Can't believe it's been a month. Pretty nice view from here. I’m sitting in a chaise lounge while a machine ices and compresses my leg, sipping a black nitro brew from a coffee shop, looking out my window at a sunny, almost 40 degree (F) day. Have just returned from a few short errands that included a trip to the grocery store because I had a mad craving for Fruity Pebbles (that's what happens when you watch a history show about the production of sugar cereals). Drove with the windows down and music blaring (ABBA -- yes, I am a cheeseball) because that's how we roll here in the Midwest.

Think we can recap this week and the next few as my finally getting why these weeks, after the acute pain of the surgery pain is faded, are both rewarding and frustrating.

Or, also, "Lessons in learning to walk again after THR and weeks of partial weight bearing AND over a year of walking like a penguin" (which is totally not as cool as walking like an Egyptian as the Bangles 80s song goes).

Lesson One: Shows on the Teevee Get a Lot Wrong
The terrible television I’m streaming (“Falcon Crest”) just happens to be featuring a storyline where a main character has to learn to walk again. But um....quelle surprise....nurses wearing white hats and dresses is not the only thing wrong with this picture.

Chase (the “studly” leading man) takes a bullet to his abdomen and some shrapnel gets lodged in his spine. He is paralyzed. Then, teevee doctor character comes in, says, “Chase, only YOU are going to decide whether these legs walk again,” and slams his hand down on Chase’s leg. Chase says, “Wait! I felt something!” (note to self: ask surgeon to perform this miracle slap on my leg next time I see him).

Next ep has Chase on those parallel bar trainers, using his arms to pull himself along as his entire family (er, HIPAA wasn’t a thing back then?), teevee doctor watch. You know what’s coming…sure enough, he falls in a heap and teevee doctor yells “Orderly! Help! Now!” Said “orderly” runs over with crutches, but Chase is too busy shaking his fist at the sky to notice. He is hauled to his feet by teevee doctor as the orderly gets him back on crutches. Now I’m really nervous about PT next week.

Next ep has Chase on crutches working in the winery during bottling or something (this takes place on a vineyard, btw) and he is goaded by evil Lorenzo Lamas to climb up metal stairs to a catwalk where he is further goaded (“sorry, is this too taxing for you?”) to checking a tap on a barrel (evil Lorenzo has loosened this) and…da da dum…suddenly the tap breaks and Chase is awash in a flood of cabernet that knocks him down and leaves him clinging to the catwalk, soaked and now cursing not only the skies again but also evil Lorenzo. Chase, maybe try a more graduated OT next time?

On the same ep, we now have Chase crutching through his vineyards, fed up and sweaty. Chase throws the crutches, does the patented teevee zombie stagger and face plants in the dirt. Good choice, dude. It’s 1982. No cell phones for you. So he somehow manages to drag himself standing and get his crutches under him again and repeats. Zombie stagger/faceplant/more sweat/award-winning look of grit and determination/hauls himself up/throws his crutches down and zombie staggers/faceplants again.

Next scene is in his house: his family sits, worried to death, and here he comes through the door, clothes in tatters, sweaty and filthy, and he dramatically throws the crutches to the floor. Everyone cheers. It’s dark out, so this means Chase has been zombie staggering through the vineyards for hours in the dark and he’s not even asking for an aspirin or an ice pack. What a man! I, personally, would recommend a soak in some ice cold pinot grigio, both for drinking and because it is going to take an obscene amount of cold to even touch the amount of swelling and pain and regrets he would discover were he not on teevee, but that’s how you do recovery, soap opera style. So all of you manly men out there…get thee to a vineyard and get going. You’ll be cured in no fewer than 2 episodes and you may earn an Emmy nomination to boot if you grimace and sweat hard enough.

Lesson 2: These next few weeks may be a tad Dickensian -the worst of recovery and the best of recovery


Big old weekend excursion. We met some friends to watch their daughter’s high school hockey tournament game. That meant: in car, drive 20 min, park, walk from car to arena which included a fun skyway that has one heck of an incline, more walking in the arena, sitting for two hours (aside from standing to cheer, of course), then more standing as we chatted with said friends and waited to say hi to their daughter (and, if you’ve ever waited for a teenage girl to get ready to go out, you know that’s not exactly a short wait), walk back to car (decline this time!), into car, drive home.

And guess what? The walking around the smooth, flat concourse on my walker felt AMAZING. Some muscles complained initially, but they figured it out and pretty soon I was zipping along, faster and taller than I ever did before surgery. We ran into several people we knew and everyone commented on how well I was moving – guess people expect someone using a walker to be all hunched over and mincing along, but I was hardly leaning on it at all. That was a celebration day for sure.

I've also been working in the cane (short putters around the house) a bit as surgeon suggested I could do. Did NOT like it at first – the balance and grip just feel so weird and I’m trying to follow the instructions (use opposite arm of op leg, place just ahead of foot, step with weight on op leg and cane) but it just feels so awkward. Also, my back and wrist really weren’t too keen on it, but I figured out taking smaller strides helped and it’s better for use in the kitchen, anyway. So I also did more of that this weekend.

Also, have gone from prescription strength naproxen (anti inflammatory) to OTC dose. From 1000 mgs a day to 500 mgs.

Soooo....Sunday night I'm sitting on the couch with over 20 pounds of purramedic happily sunk into my lap and...huh. Glute isn't too happy. Oh, wait, neither is the quad. Oh, IT band, too? Oh, ****, now the hip flexors/hip area. Ouch. Ouch. Ouch. Pain reaches a 4. Sigh. Take oxy before bed. Better in the morning.

Ah. So that's why this particular part in recovery is so frustrating and why it’s just as much a mental game as it is physical. My wife reminded me that the PT at the surgery center warned me about such things. PT said “you may feel like you can do more – if one lap feels good, you’ll want to do two. Don’t.” Sigh. Hi, I’m the puckhead. Nice club you have here. It’s called the overdid it club, right? When’s dinner?

This must be the period in recovery where I feel better than I actually am? Well, at least I've rehabbed other injuries and surgeries and this part is relatively familiar to me -- the two steps forward/one step back/dosey-do/bang your head/stick your elbow in-hokey pokey recovery dance.

Assorted Other Sights and Experiences from the Week 5 Trail

I crossed my op leg over the non op leg, baseball player style, to put on a sock. Stretch, but no pain. Can thank a purramedic for that, as she was obsessed with the ropes on the sock putter-on-er and wasn’t giving them up for anything, so I said, fine, you can have it and gave it a go putting on my sock and I could do it! Whooo! I got dressed without aids this morning. I like the dressing stick, though. It’s very dapper. I may take it with me when I start going to the gym for style points.

Scar is feeling a lot less nasty to the touch – smoother and a lot of the glue has worn off

Water balloon seems to be gone. What a relief.

*medical graphic trigger warning* So, while at the hockey game, was chatting with someone who claimed knowledge of medical procedures. She claims that THR is the "bloodiest" ortho surgery there is (really? I only lost 30 ccs of blood, which is nothing compared to the abdominal surgeries I had) and that, if the surgeon is tall enough, blood splatter will go right over h/her head, but if h/she is short, the blood will splatter all over their legs. Nice. Will have to ask my surgeon if he avoided the splatter zone. Think it’s a little personal to just ask, “hey, how tall are ya, doc? And do you like long walks on the beach and good conversation?”

I have missed being around people and all their unfiltered glory.

Next week, PT starts, and I look forward to getting some advice progressing to FWB as well as some reassurance that yes, I will eventually walk without aids. I’m still quite anxious about the fracture, even though I know I’m starting week 6, the beginning of the time range for fracture healing, and my surgeon has given the OK to start a slow transition. Don’t think I’ll feel completely at ease until my next post-op at 8 weeks and I plan to ask for an x-ray just to confirm bone growth. Thing is, because the fracture is inside the socket, it’s not visible on the x-ray, so I’m not going to see any proof (not that I can make out anything on xrays anyway), but I think, if I’m understanding correctly, if there’s good bone growth, the fracture would have healed up in that process.

Meanwhile, key things:

Smaller, shorter, slower steps
Stop when I'm feeling good
My body is the only timeline that matters
Fruity Pebbles are not what they used to be. :(
My wife is usually right

Cheers!
 
re the PWB, I have one word for you:
ONIONS! :rotfl:
Seriously though, @HollyNY 's article makes a great deal of sense to me. I will continue to hope that is all it is.

You made me look up fondant potatoes! Wow that looks sinful.... it sounds as picky as risotto though-- do try again when you're having me over:wink:

Yeah, but....how would I make anything spicy enough without onions or cayenne or red pepper flakes or jalapenos???? :snork:I know here in the Heartland we're supposed to pass out at the sight of a green pepper, but....

Attached for your viewing pleasure and your guided meditations are a few local-color ideas!
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When you come over for fondant potatoes, if you would kindly bring the names of those beautiful blooms? Maybe even a seedling or shoot? I know the daffodils, but not the others. As it happens, we started a landscaping project last year and dug up the rock pits so they could be turned into planting areas. I love those pink ones in the picture - not sure they'd be up for a northern zone, but I'm definitely looking for ideas for planting.

I will think of you doing the church lotus the first time I cross my legs or sit on my foot and get that streeeeeetttch in the IT band. I miss that stretch a lot. The things you get excited about after THR....

Happy week and spring flowers, @zauberflöte Eventually, or so I'm told, we also get some kind of green up here!
 
Great write up @thepuckhead thanks for cheering me up. I'm a week or so ahead of you and have joined the ODIC these last few days so I recognise the two steps forward / one step back dance! Planning to take paracetamol and codeine at bedtime tonight in the hope of staying ahead of the aches and pains. Good luck with your ongoing healing & take care!
 
Re: Falcon Crest, hysterical!!!
I watched that History Channel episode on Fruity Pebbles too. No more Sunday night football so have to resort to other shows.
Sounds like you are coming along nicely, as you know, zings and zaps all part of healing.
 
Great update and also love the Falcon Crest stuff! Fantastic to get out and be in an Arena again with the cool air and stinky sock smell I’m sure lol! Wishing you loads of healing energy over the transition in the next few weeks.
 
Nice summary @thepuckhead as always! I never watched those prime time soaps like Dynasty or Falcon Crest, but I know my mom did. But had I known it contained miracle medical advice, I might have changed my tune. Off to find the nearest barrel of Cabernet.

Glad you are getting around better despite the various aches and pains. I have self-diagnosed IT band tightness in my op-side knee. Has all the hallmarks and has made sleeping a challenge (although last night was the best in over a week). Once I have some more healing under my belt, I'm going to attack that IT band like it owes me money.

I've watched a few videos of hip surgeries and haven't seen obscene amounts of blood (not to mention any splatter). I know we all lose our fair share, but it's not like it's pouring out these days. They cauterize as they cut.

Continued good thoughts! And get working on that book!
 
You will have more progress days than pain days.

As you feel better you try to do more.

Yesterday I cleared 4" of snow from my car and moved it myself for the plow.

My leg and lower back feel it slightly but they have not been tested to this degree.

Last year a neighbor had to do it for me.

Will be the last time I am glad to move snow.
 
@the puck head oh my oh my you are On A Roll!! Your Falconcrest narration is hilarious! I'm thinking that in my hospital visits in the 1980's, some of the RN's did wear white dresses. I know the candy-stripers wore pink/white stripey dresses and couldn't read the Do Not Disturb sign on my door....this was in the day we had to pay extra to get single-occupancy!

A warm welcome to our ODIC..... we all have to learn! And now you know, so one might think you'll never darken the door again, but if you're normal, you will! However, they do say we swim in Cabernet....

The flowers: the pink one is a camellia, not sure how it would do in a colder climate. I never even heard of them until I moved here. The mass of purple is a tall mature "star magnolia" tree, not in my yard. It has another name but I don't know it. The flowers against the fence are hellebores, Lenten Roses they are also called.

So.... dressing stick to the gym eh? I vote you get a nice proper walking stick and start thinking about dancing up the walls and across the ceiling! It will come! You will walk sans aids. You will dance sans aida. You will skate sans aids but with mucho padding!!! (Oh no! There is no ice-rink sporty emoji!!!!)
 
Well, hello from a lovely overcast, SNOWING day Week 6 checkpoint!

Because I know you're all dying to know - good thing Chase He-Manned himself out of paralysis and back to his regular old self in under 3 episodes because the man cannot catch a break. His wife got an "unoperable" brain tumor! She was gonna die. Except, wait, Dr. TeeVee just happens to be the only surgeon in the world who can save her. Funny, he didn't smack her on the head and tell her, "only YOU can decide whether that tumor kills you or not!" So then she got the operation and was in a coma so Chase had to bring her back to life by leaning close and saying, "I love you." Well, that woke her up! True love has nothing on the medical advances of the 80s. THEN, a psychotic murderer comes to town and kidnaps Chase's grandson and locks herself in something called a "springhouse" (is this a California thing? Or a rich people thing? Or are spring houses standard on large vineyards? Must Google.). The sniper who is set up in a thicket of ivy manages to hit a lamp that catches some curtains on fire (um....was that a whale oil lamp or....?) and then every man standing around has to rush right into the fire and then Chase has to rush in to save all the other idiots and drag them out. I think the psycho dies, but I'm more concerned with how inadequate I feel. No way could I save anyone from a burning building right now and I wasn't even paralyzed. Oh well.

Meanwhile, in the non-soap version of recovery, things are going pretty darn well. Milestones:
  • Started PT
  • First dip in a pool!
  • Went up and down the steps reciprocating/grown up style (with cane) and for the first time I could walk all the way up without collapsing on the banister like I did pre-op.
  • My normally cast-iron stomach has hit its limit with the naproxen or Tylenol or both, so today I did not take anything in the morning.
  • Took my walker to the walking track last weekend and wheeled around a bit. Totally got lapped by the Very Serious Silver Sneaker Walkers in Track Suits. Wouldn't have happened to Chase, I'm sure.
  • Have been running short errands for regular walking/exposure to other people. Bonus points for getting pesky things like oil changes and routine lab appointments done and then rewarding myself with another box of cereal from childhood (this week, Cocoa Pebbles). THANKS, Food that Built America!
Notes from the PT front
Whew. Got a good one. Rehabbing various sprains and some back problems and one back surgery has made me a pretty discerning PT customer. Was worried I'd get one of those people who relies on inputting my answers to the questions on the computer rather than talking to me. "How far would you say you could walk during your normal day time activities?" Are you serious? Do you not see that I've brought in a CANE and a WALKER and I'm shoveling Fruity Pebbles down my gullet! "Hmmmm...would you say fifty yards, more than a mile, or less than an inch? Those are my choices the AI is giving me." Yeah, very glad my PT is not like that!

She came to collect me and saw I had a notebook. Said, "Are those your questions for me?" She had read my case and emailed my surgeon to confirm any special considerations. Agrees that the priority is still protecting that blasted fracture until a full 8 weeks have passed (max healing timeframe for stress fractures). Has a very good approach to the exercises and stretches. As in, try it, if it's too aggressive, feels even a bit too much, stop. Talked about my goals and pain levels. She said, "you seem like somebody who may do too much too soon, so give yourself a little grace over the next two weeks." Who, me? She answered all my questions and watched me walk with a cane, adjusted the cane so it was a better height. She pronounced my walk "pretty darn good...you're hardly using the cane, actually." And....no limp!!

My range of motion is very good except for external rotation, which means that I wasn't crazy at all about this idea that I'm supposed to be able to turn my leg OUT at the knee. When does THAT ever happen? Oh, wait...yeah, goaltending...my wife said, 'well, no WONDER you couldn't butterfly!' Yeah, ya think?

I asked about the various muscles at the top of the front of the thigh. Even before surgery, that was a spot that was pretty painful. This is when I learned there's a stubby little muscle in there called the tensor fasciae latae (not to be confused with a latte, which sounds awfully good right about now) that gets all the work of walking and stairs when the glutes are weak and not working and the piriformis takes over and then calls it quits. I've named him Napoleon because he's short and crabby and sick of the other troops not pulling their weight. It's nice to know there is actually a muscle in there that's the culprit.

She gave me some stretches and exercises to do (actually loaded them on my phone so I could watch a video demo, too) and recommended swimming or stationary cycling over walking with a walker - more benefit. She's a big swimmer,so she could suggest specific strokes to start with and starting with no more than 15 minutes (stern look). No fly or breast stroke just yet. Water walking encouraged.

I am thrilled to say that the standing hip flexor stretch felt great. I can also do straight leg raises now without pain! I could never do that before surgery. So excited!

Less excited about the stupid clamshells. I am not a mollusk. I have never known a PT to NOT do these and I've always hated them. I gave 'em the college try, but my IT band was just having none of it, so nope, no pretending I'm lying on the bottom of the ocean floor just waiting to be made into a chowder. It's not that they hurt, but my IT band is just too tight right now so if there is no progress I will ask for an alternative. I get that the glute medius needs to pick up its game, but there have to be other options.

It's been really helpful for me to approach the PT movements as an exploration or almost a meditation. A gentle asking what still hurts, what's doing well. I used to think I needed to grit my teeth, exceed the recommended reps and earn...well, what? A sticker? A cookie? Very glad to have made listening to my body a priority above all else.

The Big Swim (or, lessons in perspective and gratitude)
OK, so, the reason the actual swimming shouldn't be longer than 15 minutes is because it's QUITE the production to get into the pool. I showed up at the rec center with walker, cane, gym bag, purse, and a big old smile on my face. I'm FREE! But first, make sure I get a locker on the TOP row, close to the showers. Then, decide to go down the very shallow 5 steps instead of use the elevator. Fold up walker, hold cane and walker in one hand, sling purse and gym bag behind me and hold on to the railing. Start to go down. Realize I'm going down grown-up style without even thinking about it! Have to stop and remind myself I should still be doing these toddler style? I'm creating kind of a scene - several people offer to carry something. I smile like a crazy person. Heck no, I almost went down steps without thinking! This is FABULOUS!!

In the locker room, I take up the entire bench and hope the sight of my walker and cane makes people less irritated. I can bend over now without twinges or pain so getting on my swimsuit isn't quite the ordeal I was afraid of. A little scary on the bathroom tile, but get myself into a shower to get my swim cap on and then out we go!

****, there's someone already in the lane right by the steps. Hmmm. Oh, what a nice person - she sees me walker-ing over to the steps and offers to move. Sometimes, people don't suck!

And now....a few slow kicks hanging on to the wall. Hmmmm. Not bad. Begin a slow freestyle. Oh, come ON, IT band, really? I did not make you do clamshells. Can't you please take one for the team so that my upper body can have some fun? FINE! Switch to water walking. Better. But...I want to SWIM. Backstroke. IT band starts whining. Look, I am NOT turning this car around....just a few more. Oh, it's 20 minutes already? ****, I used to do ten times this much, but OK, fine, have it your way, you bratty IT band.

Back to the locker room to collect various soapy things so I do not smell like chemicals. Am very happy for the accessible shower though I nearly break the shower head trying to adjust the height before realizing it is non-adjustable. Walker also got good and sudsy, so I guess it's clean now, too. Claim the entire bench again to get dressed and thankfully I remembered to bring the sock putter-on-er. I can do it without, but the stretch when I do is just a little bit deeper than I really want right now.

Up the steps and out the door and it is SNOWING again. Grrrrrrrrrr. I start walker-ing up the ramp to my car, kinda bummed that the swim didn't feel as good as I'd hoped and then...I stopped in my tracks. Because I remembered the last time I went swimming before surgery. Because I remembered hurting like crazy just walking up those shallow stairs and limping all the way back to my car. Because I fully get the difference now between arthritis pain that won't go away and muscle complaints that are completely temporary and don't leave me limping or even in pain. This is amazing. It really is.

Back home to ice machine and cup of something called kaskara, given to me as a recovery gift. It's a strange cross between tea and coffee but I kind of like it. And I have no pain right now. I can get up and just walk when I need to. That's with no pain medication whatsoever this morning.

And I know that few people except those on this board would understand, so thanks again for letting me natter on.

Cheers and onward we go!

Once I have some more healing under my belt, I'm going to attack that IT band like it owes me money.
Ha ha!! I haven't heard that saying before. Now I'm picturing you and me as mafia bosses, shining a spotlight on those IT bands and saying, "THERE ARE THREE WAYS OF DOING THINGS AROUND HERE: THE RIGHT WAY, THE WRONG WAY, AND THE WAY THAT I DO IT."

A warm welcome to our ODIC..... we all have to learn! And now you know, so one might think you'll never darken the door again, but if you're normal, you will! However, they do say we swim in Cabernet....

The flowers: the pink one is a camellia, not sure how it would do in a colder climate. I never even heard of them until I moved here. The mass of purple is a tall mature "star magnolia" tree, not in my yard. It has another name but I don't know it. The flowers against the fence are hellebores, Lenten Roses they are also called.

Well, why didn't anyone tell me about this pool of Cabernet?? Is there also a champagne fountain that bubbles over into a nice infinity pool of chardonnay? And I suppose, this being the ODIC, no horseplay allowed on the deck and no diving or spitting?

Oh, yeah, the camellia is beautiful but cold is not its thing. However, you're the second poster to mention hellebores as a lovely sight (can't remember who else, but someone mentioned seeing them on a walk). I may have to check these out....

Oh, my gosh, candy stripers. You know, I wouldn't necessarily mind someone coming around at the hospital with water and magazines. I might prefer a copy of a 1976 Good Housekeeping and read about the grapefruit diet to being rudely awakened at 3am for the mandatory blood pressure/temp check. Now I'm nostalgic. And hungry. :loll:
 
@thepuckhead ROFL if you ever need a different career you'd make a fortune writing a disaster sit-com with a HER-O-INE who can't put her socks on cuz the leg won't bend at the knee to get onto the opposite knee.

You do write a very entertaining and excellent update! Conga rats on getting what sounds like an excellent and effective PT gal .... I did enjoy the two I had during recupe from hip replacements. And kud oos on getting into the pool, doing errands, climbing stairs like a real grown up .... all of those are wonderful milestones to mark your progress.

And those old timey amusements are some fun once in awhile

:dancy: :cheers2::flwrysmile:
 
you'd make a fortune writing a disaster sit-com with a HER-O-INE who can't put her socks on cuz the leg won't bend at the knee to get onto the opposite knee
Don't know about a fortune (though I wouldn't turn it down), but I'm really starting to think @Caison113 is on to something and there may need to be a cozy mystery series of joint replacement HER-oines who use not only their brains and wit and seemingly innocent personalities to solve crimes. They get themselves out of predicaments using the tools only they know how to use - canes, walkers, sock-putter-on-ers, long shoehorns, dressing sticks, etc. Kind of like James Bond except they don't need stunt doubles.

I would need a more logical brain, though, to actually write a mystery. They're very, very hard to do!

Thanks for the laugh!
 
"Head. Puck Head" has a sort of a ...... very strange ring to it.... @thepuckhead .....

I will bet you there is a seminar/intensive class thingy for writing mysteries just as there is Clarion and Clarion West for SF! There must be a formula or algorithm for mysteries. I know!! Ask chatGPT to write you something:heehee:

Your update was fabulous! Your "a new dawn" moment on the ramp after swimming-- not everybody gets a moment like that! And your PT Yoda, she's a gift too.

@HollyNY you just wrote three novel-openers at least as good as "It was a dark and stormy night"-- maybe you two can collaborate on these mysteries....
 
Greetings from almost 2 months out or week 7-8 transition checkpoint!

There's a lot going well, but Falcon Crest is not one of those things. For one, I know that ladies' fashion from the 80s gets a really well deserved bad rep (shoulder pads, L'Oreal studio style shellacked claw bangs), but gentlemen were making all kinds of questionable choices too, especially with regards to athletic wear. In particular, I need not EVER see a guy fresh off the tennis court sporting ultra tight-tight,ultra- white and ultra short shorts and tube socks. Also, who goes jogging wearing a pair of said shorts OVER a pair of long wind pants?

Our stud, Chase, that's who! I shouldn't rip on the guy's fashion choices when he has made a miracle recovery from paralysis and brought his wife out of a coma and ALSO survived a plane crash, but....guess I'll be glad I didn't have to see him in sport shorts alone.

And yes, he did survive a plane crash - he was the pilot (because, you know, being a pilot provides excellent training for running a vineyard) and the plane was sabotaged by the bad guys (the mysterious "cartel" that is either mafia, Nazis or some combo of both but they have limitless ability to plant phone bugs, blow up cars and kidnap people in broad daylight). The show has hit that awkward phase (also called contract negotiations) where original characters vanish mysteriously or perish in previously mentioned car booms (or do they???) and a slew of new characters crash the show and now there are soooooo many middle aged white guys and sultry blonde women running around I need captions or a ticker to remind me who they are.

Except Lorenzo Lamas, who is now gratuitously featured shirtless and executing various martial arts kicks at (at least to my non-stud self) very strange times. Pretty sure this is when he was at the zenith of his heartthrob days and so, yeah, why not have him doing roundhouses on the veranda at breakfast as Jane Wyman sips her coffee and raises her eyebrow at him. So @Caison113 - I await the moment in your recovery when you surprise your wife with shirtless kicks over breakfast tea and scones.

Meanwhile, Dr. TeeVee died in the plane crash, so I guess no more magical hero slaps to heal people. Oh, but one more flashback that had me rolling. Dr. TeeVee comes up to the nurses' station because the nurse (in white cap and skirt and WHITE NYLONS...sweet beet pie, those used to exist!) has PAGED him to let him know some X-rays are in. He shows up and she asks him, "Doctor, may I get you a cup of coffee?" I can't....you guys....I can't...

Oh. The hip. Right, then! Let's get to it.

Ratio of progress and giddy moments to freaky deaky,"recovery is weird" (thanks to @Merrimay for that description) moments is definitely in favor of the white hat side!

  • Zings and zaps came and went - shout out to bonesmart search tool. I figured, from reading here, that these were nerves waking up and complaining at their rebuild effort, but I also consulted Dr. Google and of course, "NERVE DAMAGE FROM SURGERY!" came right up. It pays to search here; it really does.
  • Because the body can really be a freakshow, here's something super trippy that happened - I started to reach down and pick up a purramedic's water bowl and suddenly it was as if my legs couldn't figure out how to move. They froze. For a second or two, I was just stuck. It wasn't painful, just really, really weird. Of course, after I figured out that I could move, of course, then I had a big old cramp in my inner thigh like the aftermath of a powerful muscle spasm and THEN of course it was off the races with anxiety, but since I have been listening to my body and know the difference now between fatigue, complaining, stop and STOP NOW AND CALL THE PROFESSIONALS, I took the antihistamine prescribed to help with spasms and also started magnesium supplements (thanks again, BS!). Talked to both my PT and surgeon about said trippy experience and PT thinks I may have turned at an angle that pushed the new joint to its limit of flexibility - kind of like if I were to try to do the splits and reached the point where my hips weren't going to go any further, no way, no how. Neither PT nor surgeon was concerned, so I will not be, either. If I think about it, had this happened when I wasn't in recovery and was just exerting myself, I would have just shrugged it off as "eh, pushed myself to my limit." Now that my muscles are recovering, my "limit" is new and will be changing.
OK, that's it for the edition of "Recovery is Weird." Now, onto the list of "This is Freaking Amazing!"

  • Post-op visit with surgeon confirmed the new hip has not budged from where he placed it. Fracture is not causing any issues at all. I am clear to not only progress with "regular" rehab, but to "live my life." He pointed out the bone growth around the femur spike and there isn't a speck of gap. I asked about the risk of psoas tendinopathy (thanks again, BS, for providing info on complications!) and he pointed out that the cup was nowhere near my psoas tendon, so I shouldn't have any problems. Told him that while I understood falling may well be a catastrophe, I'm human and I'm probably going to live long enough that my chances of falling is NOT zero, so worse case, what happens? He said the risk of fracture, especially after the first few months, is very small, so not to live my life in fear. Check. I asked what "thin bone" referred to from my scary surgery report and confirmed it is an anatomical description. Some people have thin acetabular cups, some have thick ones. It is probably the only thing about me that anyone will ever describe as "thin" (except my patience), so I'll take that as a compliment.
  • Plug for discussing goals with your surgeon - mine said he felt bad that my rehab was slower because of the fracture, but he also said that he knew "what I wanted to get back to" and so that clearly informed his decision. Open discussions/questions with your surgeon can definitely have an impact on decisions made regarding your care, so very important to do.
  • He said I could get back on the ice AFTER I am 100% confident painlessly walking without a limp and can do some strengthening and flexibility. He said I could do anything I needed to do out there but I'd benefit from some off ice training, especially if I was a real butterfly style goalie. I said I was more of a "belly flop" style goalie and only a backup, but point taken.
  • I thanked him from the bottom of my heart and tears gathering in my eyes. I also accidentally kept the pair of gym shorts they gave me to change into for the x-ray. :heehee: Oops. I've been sherpa-ing myself around with a backpack for several weeks and it's just habit to pack up everything in reach!
  • PT said the walker could go. And it's folded up in my car "just in case," but the case is pretty much closed. Bye, walker! :egypdance: Am now 'graduated' to a cane and walking indoors without one if I can. And I can. Thanks to BS, I knew to practice "heel to toe" and so I am very nearly without a limp. I do have a tendency to "sink" into my left hip on the first step, so my first steps are very small and slow, but they're steps! Speaking of steps, that's next week at PT.
  • Am enjoying making the PT exercises a daily meditation/connection with my body. Since my surgeon has given me the confidence that the implant is just fine and I can do whatever with it, now I know that all the soft tissues need some attention and care and that is way more familiar to me. Any twinges or aches are no longer signs of impending doom.
  • I can do clamshells now. I'm not ready for my close up, but I can do 'em
  • Best of all - I asked her to show me how to get down to the floor and so I followed her movements and got down to the floor! I almost started rolling around and kicking my feet in glee, but I restrained myself. AND, when getting back up, IT DIDN'T HURT. So now I can get down on the floor and back up without pain. I can be on my knees without pain. Did someone say gardening? Did someone say resuming my volunteer work with wildlife? Did someone say resuming purramedic toilet duties? :skep:
  • Have been swimming a few more times - each time gets better. Walked into the locker room of one of the fancier gym locations and remembered the last time I was there, I could hardly stand to walk to the first row of lockers. Now, I can choose where-ever I want to go.
  • At the fancy place, I found a Roman chair, which sounds like a torture device, but it's just a way to do abs while bracing your forearms and back on supports. Oh, abs. I have missed our sessions so! And I found another machine where I could stand and do some chest and back work. I'm usually a basic dumbbell and pull down kinda gal and those machines had about a billion levers to figure out (I don't think a rocketship has as many controls), but I managed.
  • Also found that there is a heavybag at the fancy place! @Caison113 - first time I punch that thing when I'm stronger will be in your honor!
  • The toenails. They are clipped. It was an ugly hack job, but I got 'er done!
  • I put on socks and tie my shoes with only a little tightness in the IT band. And that is continuing to get better, too.
  • Finally saw my mother-in-law for the first time since both of us had our surgeries. She is a very different person now. None of the pending anxiety or tears -- talking about how she can't wait to get outside and the progress she's making with the in-home PT (able to get in and out of the car on her own, able to stand for 6 minutes without aid, doing laps with her walker). She did say she occasionally gives the PT the rude finger once in a while. She admired my cane and said she's taking notes of all the different styles of cane she sees at her doctor's offices, thinking of which one she wants when she progresses to a cane. Both of us are now booing the weather forecasts of more snow - we're both from very snow-familiar states and live in a state that doesn't skimp on winter, but we are both so ready to get OUTSIDE and enjoy. I sat in the same room and just marveled at how different it was from the last time when I was there - how tired and anxious and miserable we all were. The entire house felt lighter and happier. At some point we'll have to compare incisions and scars because her primary care doc said my MIL's scar was plastic-surgeon quality! Well! Mine's delightfully pink and pretty smooth, but I don't know about plastic surgeon quality!
I'm also finding that I'm laughing more - didn't realize how much the pain had really taken away from me. I am just filled with gratitude and thankfulness today and have a new, very organic desire to take care of myself instead of pushing through old routines out of habit or because I think I "should."

Sending everyone healing strength and good wishes! :thumb:


They cauterize as they cut

Blood spatter and now the smell of burning flesh. Y’all really know how to sell the surgery.

Thanks for these updates @thepuckhead — despite the Monty Python-esque visuals — your recovery stories are giving me some hope for me too!

Hi, @LaKarune - was just thinking about you because I picked up one of the books you suggested in your post (What My Bones Know) and am really glad I did. It's an incredible read. Have the other title on my wish list at the library, too. Hope your decision-making process and research are fruitful and helpful - I'm glad these posts give you some hope and optimism. I'm a pretty skeptical and overly analytical person by nature, so I promise, I am not just blowing sunshine and rainbows because it's the nice thing to do! I truly have found some sunshine and rainbows in all of this.
 

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