Oh my, you need to give yourself more time (Jamie and others are probably rolling their eyes right now because they had to give me the same advice, lol) I REALLY understand how hard it is to accept help from other people. I have finally put a painful, year long battle behind me.....
5 surgeries
4 dislocations
3 ambulance rides
2 new prosthetic devices
1 staph infection (and anaphylactic shock thrown in for good measure, lol.)
Give yourself time. My first failed revision on my 5 year old hip transplant was on
January 3 2022. After so many restarts, I was allowed to leave rehab and to administer IV antibiotics to myself on January 3, 2023. I never expected ANY of this but I finally see the light at the end of the tunnel ( and it's not another train this time, lol)
Stay strong! I gained so much strength just from the support of people on this site that I've never even met before. Get angry, get sad....but stay focused in your recovery. People need you!