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Depression before surgery

Discussion in 'Knee Replacement Pre-Op Area' started by HollyM, Apr 13, 2012.

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  1. HollyM

    HollyM Junior Member

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    I have to ask - is there anyone else out there that is kinda depressed?? I'm excited to get the surgery done, but this waiting is so DEPRESSING for me! I wake up and plan on having a great day - and by the mid-afternoon I'm sad and hurting. :cry4: By evening I'm downright crabby to my poor husband and daughter. I know it's from my knee...but its not who I am.

    I want to smile again...

    Holly
     
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  2. Jamie

    Jamie Administrator

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    Oh, Holly.......you have LOTS of company with your fellow BoneSmarties!!! Pain can turn even the sunniest person grumpy. It affects EVERYTHING. You have a cycle of hurting, not resting properly, working harder to compensate for the painful movements....it is a cycle that we are all familiar with.

    The best thing I can tell you is to try and keep the pain at bay with medications, ice and resting. I know the time goes slowly when waiting for surgery! The wait is the HARDEST PART!!! But your day in the sun is coming soon....hang in there. We are always here to listen to a whine or venting of that frustration. Believe me....BoneSmarties understand!!!
     
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  3. Josephine

    Josephine NURSE DIRECTOR, BONESMART Administrator

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    I can't imagine anyone not being depressed pre-op! and I bet you're the kind of girl who smiles through it and everyone thinks you are all sweet and bubbly but you're really crying inside. :grouphug2: :console:
     
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  4. Jazyb

    Jazyb Post-Grad

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    Hi Holly

    I can completely relate to your comments. I was just the same the months I had to wait before surgery. It is stress, anxiety and depression all rolled into one!! It is a tough time but you will get through it and in no time your life will be so much better. Keep your chin up and it's not too long for you now :thumb:
     
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  5. Roy Gardiner

    Roy Gardiner Forum Advisor

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    Me too. My family say I'm now a 'changed man', for the better, too!
     
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  6. Jacky48

    Jacky48 Don

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    Hi Holly,
    I sure hear where you're coming from, because I'm in the same boat! The waiting is a pain and I mean PAIN!:tantrum2: Our replacements are so close and yet so far! It seems every step you take, every move you make there's a pain from somewhere if not your knees from your shoulders or your back because your whole body is out of whack! It's no wonder we get bouts of depression and crankiness. When the pain takes over our minds it also takes over our good disposition!:hissyfit: However WE WILL WIN this fight! We have begun to fight back by setting ourselves up for our new knees!:yahoo: I equate this waiting period by feeling like a car that's revving up at high speed with the car in park!:rolleyespink:

    So my dear you are not alone!:friends:We will win this and we will be able to retain that happy feeling we get when we first start our day.:loll:Every day I think ahead to a new pain free life that is a short distance in the future. I too get crabby at my husband from time to time, and he also gets crabby with me at times, so I figure it's a wash!:th_heehee:

    I say allow yourself your moods it's not like you get them without a cause! This way when your mood lifts you don't have to think about what happened and feel bad about it, you can look forward and think ahead to brighter days!

    I wish you the best and we both will look ahead to happier days!:hapydancsmil:
     
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  7. Jazyb

    Jazyb Post-Grad

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    :goodpost: Jacky and I agree :thumb:
     
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  8. tashia

    tashia Sr Bonesmartie

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    :goodpost:I agree.:doggieshmooze:Tashia:friends:
     
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  9. newnee

    newnee Graduate

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    Hi Holly I certainly understand how you feel The waiting for my TKR was horrible I thought my surgery date would never get here. I would go to work and by the time I got home my knee was screaming. I was trying to train people at work without taking my pain and frustration out on them. I jumped a on a few of my co workers but they for the most part ignored it.

    This time will go by quicker than you think one day you will wake up and realize your surgery date is here and you will be on the road to recovery. Come back anytime you need to talk we are here for you. i and others have been where you are now and we understand what you are going through you are not alone
     
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  10. proskier

    proskier Junior Member

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    I never thought my surgery date would come. I was totally obsessed. Now that I'm 30 days past surgery and 24 days before my next TKR, I'm wishing time would slow down. Rehab is tough going and frankly, I'm really dreading the next but I have to keep reminding myself that this will pass and the rest of my life will be so much better. Depression is part of the process as is anger and frustration. You need give yourself a break, let the feelings out, then move on. I give myself a set time to scream, cry, feel really sorry for myself ( about 10-15 min) then go back to the public, positive face most of my friends see. Just know, that you have lots of company.
     
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  11. Nyland

    Nyland Post-Grad

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    Good morning Proskier,
    Can you delay your 2nd surgery a few weeks so that you may heal a bit more? I know that we all want surgery and recovery over and done with, but what's a few more weeks if it is easier? I know that those that have the surgeries at the same time or a day or 2 apart get one recovery, but maybe in this case a little respite would be a good thing?
    Hope you feel FABULOUS today!
     
  12. Mad Rocker

    Mad Rocker Senior

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    Hi Holly

    I feel alot of the times like my avatar. My counsellor says it is post- op depression but I know it was there before the surgery. We all go through it. It's the anticipation, the lack of control and just the darn blues. :tantrum2:

    It sounds almost like a really bad country and western song. :loll:

    Take care
     
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  13. Jacky48

    Jacky48 Don

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    Carol, you really gave me a good laugh!:hysterical: And I do love your avatar! I think we can all relate at times! Thanks again for that laugh!:wink1:
     
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  14. PhoenixS

    PhoenixS Forum Advisor

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    Hi Holly;
    Yup, been there, done that, went there again. I'm now recovering from my revision, but believe me, depression is part of the whole thing.
    You unfortunately can expect more of the same since recovery is a real roller coaster.
    It eventually smooths out to a kiddie ride, but getting there is tough.

    Feel free to vent here, since we have all had it at one time or another.
    I have a history of depression and I was stable for many years. My Dr. bumped up my meds before surgery, and there I stay.
    Will plan to wean back to my original dose sometime in the fall.
    Best of luck to you;
    Sandy
     
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  15. bassplayer

    bassplayer Senior

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    Hi Holly,
    I might be having my RTKR the same week as you!

    To avoid getting depressed I generally distract myself by watching TV, surfing the web, calling friends, etc. Distraction is what gets me through. I watch TV more now than I ever did; but hey - whatever works!
     
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  16. Mad Rocker

    Mad Rocker Senior

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    Holly

    I made up my mind (when I can find it) to not watch yucky TV. I mean no CSI (too realistic---gory) and no sad TV (I'm already sad don't need extra sad. Sad is not a spice.)

    I just watch really bad B movies. Like the Attack of the Killer Tomatoes---The Thin Man series and anything from the 1930s to 1960s that is funny or weird. Trust me my brain was very susceptible to dreary suggestive sad TV.

    I found it worked. I read light fare in books. I love mystery but I stay away from the gory and real life. There is lots of selection in any "line" of literature that is not depressing.

    Here is a smile for you today, as I once heard that laughter is the best medicine.

    Laughter isn't always appropriate... I got sacked from my last job for laughing: mind you, I was driving the hearse at the time! :biggrin:

    To quote Norman Cousins:

    Drugs are not always necessary. Belief in recovery always is.

    Take care :friends:
     
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  17. HollyM

    HollyM Junior Member

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    Thanks for all the kind words and ideas! I wouldn't wish feeling depressed on any of you - but am glad to know I'm in good company!! HA!:th_heehee:

    I'm trying to focus on getting some of those pesky things done around my house that I know will have to wait for a bit after surgery. That makes me feel productive - however, sometimes I of course do too much and then my knee reminds me who's in charge! :sigh:

    I've started taking my cryo cuff with me when we visit friends. I of course have to explain it to them, but am glad that it's my traveling partner now. That way - I can still participate AND ice at the same time!!

    I think part of the issue for me is that I am a planner. This is good when you have CONTROL - but if you don't have CONTROL - then it really sucks!! :hissyfit:So I'm planning all that I can and just am going to wing it on the rest. I think once I have been to my pre-surgery meeting with the physical therapy team I'll work with at the hospital and get the chance to see my room, etc. - it will help. I'll have a visual.

    Thanks for the encouragement!!! Have a fantastic day!
     
  18. davrunner

    davrunner Senior

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    Mad Rocker, what a great sense of humor you have. Your hearse line reminded me of when my Grandfather passed. All the grandsons were pall bearers and we had one of the limos. On the way back from the cemetary we decided that if grandpa was still here he'd stop for a beer so that's what we did. The Funeral Home wasn't too happy with us but heck with the price of the funeral, taking their limo for a spin while drinking beer was okay with us.

    Holly, I'm more analytical than emotional and when I was hit with depression, trying to analyze what was going on made it that much worse. If it gets really bad, there is help out there.
     
  19. viver45

    viver45 Member

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    Holly,

    Hang in there! I believe we have all been depressed prior to surgery. For many it takes us so long to get to the place where they will do surgery, and then the waiting for our scheduled surgery date. It is a long drawn out affairs - a very painful one for most of us.

    You can vent all you want on this site - we've all been there and understand you and don't judge you! I know what you mean about getting crabby by the end of the day. I don't know how my poor husband put up with me when I came home - I know sometimes I took my pain,etc. out on him. But he just kept telling me he understood (did he really????), but that he loved me and we would get through this together - every step of the way. And we have 1 month post-op today.

    Try to find things to keep you busy - look at the exercises that are on this website - start doing them now - you will be so thankful you did them before. The better prepared you are before the easier your recovery will be.

    Try to keep a smile on your face - keep us posted!
     
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